Right, another chance to alternately build our spirits up and then disappoint them. I can't be bothered to change the winning move so it's still Mornington Crescent.
There are numerous category D type celebs present too, including Ainsley Harriot (to whom you owe a sexual favour), plus you are getting paid in pigs trotters, which are no longer legal tender in your tent.
You ghe chance to get lots of healthy walking exercise, during which you can reflect edifyingly on the transgressions which led you to this sorry pass.
you have an unexplicable desire to write to all his victims families , to try and undo all the bad that's been done, in a rather clumsy and invasive manner.
Spilt tea in the keyboard of the computer controlling the sex-line telephone exchange puts paid to the enterprise before OFCOM can paste a closure notice on it and issue you with a warrant. Phew!
The roulette wheel is made out of swiss roll shaped french cheese, the casino is really a front for some bent butchers money laundering scam and you are accused of interfering with a dozen disabled dolphins by your unworthy peers.
the nudged bollard threw the contraflow system out of alignment and the resulting traffic confusion and congestion snaked back towards the M6 to the west and Ipswich to the east, preventing thousands of families from arriving on time for their holdays on the Norfolk Broads.
The Litmus paper states that the acid is benign, almost alkaline, and Morrissey walks into your living room with the acetate of his new LP "You are the Quarry"...you get a taxi to Bermondsey to celebrate.*champagne pops*
You are, therefore, ideally suited to a position in local government. you make stacks of money by awarding contracts to huge faceless corporations that bung you some tax-free cash in exchange. (oh just read the bath chronicle you'll see what I mean...)
And so does Mrs Trellis, who reliably informs me that there is a thriving drugs scene in these ultra-respectable Welsh versions of the Costa Geriatrica.
You have just realised that the clerical error means that you are now haunting Lancashire, when in fact the true depth of the error is that you never actually died yet.
My football team steadfastly follows the maxim "And pigs might fly" when it comes to winning - still, being bolt on trotters, it's to be expected. Lovely, Rosie, that brought out a large chuckle. Fortunately the better half is out shopping. :)
I shall stick equally steadfastly to my self-imposed prohibition against mentioning anything to do with my football team, except to say, contrary to what a historian might assume, that it is not located in a small village in North Yorkshire.
You get sacked for some misdemeanour in the broom cupboard, you try to appeal but realise you haven't got a leg to stand on. [ penelope, please get my coat while your at it ]
...which means it gets burned down in a midnight raid by Clan Campbell, the hereditary enemies of Clan MacDonald ever since the days of the Glencoe Massacre.
The sheer tenuousness of the story means that we've forgotten it, and we can now place ourselves wherever we like - say, as president of the United States.
'Good News' and 'Bad News' are now indistinguishable, meaning that newsreaders need no longer practise 'good news' and 'bad news' facial expressions and the ban on botox treatments and collagen lip-implants for newsreaders is lifted.
You're going with them, and because you've been designated an enemy combatant you won't have access to a lawyer, the right to trial, or even knowledge of what you are accused of while you languish in prison for an unspecified number of years.
You support Wimbledon. A very uncommon affliction indeed. Actually I support Chelsea and have done so for 48 years. Never taken themselves too seriously, I'm glad to say; winning something would be rather vulgar, I feel. :-)
The Mute button's working OK. (Snodders) Only been once to Loftus Rd, and saw them beaten 6-3 at home by Reading. All I can remember is that it was a warm midweek night and research shows it was 21st Aug 1961.
But the window is open and the sound will get through anyway. [Rosie] Mmmm It may have changed a bit since 1961. Heavens we all have! It obviously had a profound effect on you though - to remember it so vividly. If you go again before neat April you will still qualify as a regular though. I get to more away games - living in Leicester (Dont ask).
Its Saturday and the politicos are all in their constituencies kissing hands and shaking babies and keeping well off our TV's allowing us to concentrate on the Rugby. Well something like that.
You get analysed by Cosmopolitan's psychic wanger reader, who says you have severe psychological difficulties and are probably bad in bed too. (I am not making this up. It's like palmistry, only not.)
Rosie is a master of Photoshop Elements (ref Would you welcome please) and can edit the photo to make it look like you weren't there [just like the sixties]
I would have dictator's HQ on my doorstep here in South Croydon. It's true, with Rosie living about 15mins away from me, Croydon would be the centre of a tyrannical dictatorship...
It is 1984 but with a Totalitarian Communist Regime in power. Thatcher is tried in a show trial on TV and is thrown to the lions bringing in the largest TV audience the world has ever seen.
You realise you have forgotten what the hell is going on in the thread of the story, and at the same time are picked up in a big PANDA car by the Police.
Hooray! The Police have reformed and are going to give a free impromptu concert on this shiny tank (disguised as a panda) you happen to be riding. (See Weird Anime Excel Saga for reference)