Yeah, but that's brown trousers time if you're a pirate.

That's more than offset by the fact that you get to say things like "Arrrr! Splice the mizzen! Avast behind! Arrrrr!" etc.

But only once a year.

At Chrismas time, on a big stage, with lots of B status type celebs, from crap soaps and you get paid to do it!!!

There are numerous category D type celebs present too, including Ainsley Harriot (to whom you owe a sexual favour), plus you are getting paid in pigs trotters, which are no longer legal tender in your tent.