Right, another chance to alternately build our spirits up and then disappoint them. I can't be bothered to change the winning move so it's still Mornington Crescent.
The roulette wheel is made out of swiss roll shaped french cheese, the casino is really a front for some bent butchers money laundering scam and you are accused of interfering with a dozen disabled dolphins by your unworthy peers.
the nudged bollard threw the contraflow system out of alignment and the resulting traffic confusion and congestion snaked back towards the M6 to the west and Ipswich to the east, preventing thousands of families from arriving on time for their holdays on the Norfolk Broads.
The Litmus paper states that the acid is benign, almost alkaline, and Morrissey walks into your living room with the acetate of his new LP "You are the Quarry"...you get a taxi to Bermondsey to celebrate.*champagne pops*
You are, therefore, ideally suited to a position in local government. you make stacks of money by awarding contracts to huge faceless corporations that bung you some tax-free cash in exchange. (oh just read the bath chronicle you'll see what I mean...)
And so does Mrs Trellis, who reliably informs me that there is a thriving drugs scene in these ultra-respectable Welsh versions of the Costa Geriatrica.
You have just realised that the clerical error means that you are now haunting Lancashire, when in fact the true depth of the error is that you never actually died yet.
My football team steadfastly follows the maxim "And pigs might fly" when it comes to winning - still, being bolt on trotters, it's to be expected. Lovely, Rosie, that brought out a large chuckle. Fortunately the better half is out shopping. :)
I shall stick equally steadfastly to my self-imposed prohibition against mentioning anything to do with my football team, except to say, contrary to what a historian might assume, that it is not located in a small village in North Yorkshire.
You get sacked for some misdemeanour in the broom cupboard, you try to appeal but realise you haven't got a leg to stand on. [ penelope, please get my coat while your at it ]
...which means it gets burned down in a midnight raid by Clan Campbell, the hereditary enemies of Clan MacDonald ever since the days of the Glencoe Massacre.