I'm Jake the Peg, diddle-iddle-iddle-um,
With my extra ****, diddle-iddle-iddle-um -
Nuff said.

Oh, for a **** of **** that would ascend
The brightest ***** of ******.
A ***** for a ****, ***** to ****
And ***** to behold the swelling ****.

Milking the same cow...
They're ****ing guard at Buckingham Palace -
Christopher Robin went down with Alice.
Alice is ****ing one of the guard.
"A soldier's **** is terrible hard,"
Says Alice.

BM] surely "Christopher Robin went down *** Alice" ?

My **** gone ****, I wondering why I got out of bed at all
The morning **** up my **** and I can't **** at all
And even if I could it'd all be ****, but your **** on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad and

I want to **** you for giving me the best **** of my life
Oh just to **** with you is having the best **** of my life
Push the ****, I'm **** at last and I'm soaking through and through
Then you ****ed me a**** and all I **** is you

When you **** through a *****, hold your **** up high
And don't be afraid of the ****
At the end of the ****, there's a golden ****
And the sweet silver **** of the *****
**** on through the ****, **** on through the ****
Though your ***** be tossed and blown
**** on, **** on with **** in your ****
And you'll never **** alone, you'll never **** alone.

It's been a hard **** night
I've been ******** like a dog

Holding ***** at midnight,
'Neath a starry sky;
Nice work if you can get it -
And you can get it, if you ****.

[StD] Oh, I always felt that line had sufficient innuendo as it was. Maybe I'm just too unwholesome.
**** me baby, **** me all night long.
**** me baby, like my **** ain't got no bone.

Our little **** is four years old and quite a little ****
So we **** out the **** we don't want him to ****
Words like *-O-Y or maybe *-U-*-P-*-*-S-E
But the **** we're ****ing from him now
Tear the **** right out of me.

Our *-*-V-*-R-*-E becomes **** today
**** and little J-*-* will be ****in' away
I **** you both and it will be pure *-E double * for me
Oh, I wish that we could **** this D-*-*-O-*-*-E.

**** **** merrily on high,
In **** the bells are ****ing
**** **** verily the ****
Is riven with ****-****ing.

**************************************************************************************************************************a, Hosanna in *****!

**************************************************************************************************************************a, Hosanna in *****!

E'en so here below, below,
Let ****le **** be swungen. And *-o, *-o, *-o, By p*****s and ****e ****en.
**************************************************************************************************************************a, Hosanna in *****!

**************************************************************************************************************************a, Hosanna in *****!

Oh I love to love
But my baby just loves to ****, he wants to ****, he loves to ****, he's got to ****
Oh I love to love,
But there's no time for a romance, no no no-OH!
Oh I love to love, but my baby just loves to ****

The minute
The **** begins to **** it
He's on his feet to shake it
And **** the night away

Stop!
I'm ****ing like a top
We **** until we drop
But if I have my way...

I gotta **** a little ****
A little **** to **** things over
I better **** between the ****
In case I **** it when I'm older

Now this **** I must ****
Feels like a **** upon my shoulders
Through the **** I see **** shine
It keeps me **** as **** grows colder

In my **** there's been ****-ache and pain
I don't know if I can **** it again
Can't **** now, I've ****ed so far
To **** this lonely ****

I wanna know what **** is
I want you to **** me
I wanna feel what **** is
I know you can **** me

[Following Breadmaster's lead a while ago..]
This is the **** all **** and ****
That **** the man all **** and ****
That **** the maiden all ****
That **** the **** with the crumpled ****
That tossed the dog
That **** the cat
That **** the rat
That **** the malt
That **** in the house that **** built.

I know an old lady who ****ed a cow. Don't ask me how, but she ****ed a cow!
She ****ed the cow to **** the goat,
she ****ed the goat to **** the dog,
she ****ed the dog to **** the cat,
she ****ed the cat to **** the bird,
she ****ed the bird to **** the spider
that ****ed and ****ed and ****ed inside her.
She ****ed the spider to **** the fly.
I don't know why she ****ed the fly.
Perhaps she'll ****.

Underneath the ****ing ****nut tree,
I ****ed her, and she ****ed me.
There she used to **** upon my ****,
Neath the ****ing ****nut tree.

Underneath the ****ing ****nut tree,
There she said she'd **** me.
Now, you ought to **** our family
Neath the ****ing ****nut tree!

Daisy, Daisy, give me your ****, do.
I'm half crazy all for the **** of you.
It won't be a stylish ****.
I can't afford **** ****.
But you'd look sweet upon the ****
Of a **** ***** **** two.

My **** lies over the ****
My **** lies over the ****
My **** lies over the ****
Oh **** **** my **** to me, to me!
**** ****, **** ****, oh **** **** my **** to me!

**** Roasting on an open fire
**** **** nipping at your ****
**** **** being **** by a choir
And folk **** **** **** Eskimoes
Everybody knows, a **** and some ****, help to **** the **** bright
**** **** with their eyes all aglow, will find it **** to **** tonight