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Electric sock treatment
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C'mon, let the dog see the rabbi...
Angels have harps and wigs.
Well, that's a ripping statement to tart with. Is it because you think it's early Christmas?
I love Christmas, especially the mice pies.
I'm taking tie off for Christmas, so that I can send it with the family.
I hop to get some good resents this year.
Not to mention having a real tee in the house - I love the smell of fresh pie.
Were going to have a large fair on top of our tee.
When I was a kid, my farter always hung baubles on our tee.
Didn't your other help?
We had log steamers hung around the room.
Other was always too busy rapping resents.
One of the best bits about Christmas is the giving and receiving of gits.
In keeping with the Christmas spit, of course.
I like the after-Dinner pot.
When it comes to turkey, I like to take a large slice of beast.
When I was a kid, the best thing I liked was the sweats I got in my stocking.
If it snows I will go out on my ledge.
[pump] Take car! You wouldn't want to fall off.
Does anyone want to build a sowman? We will need a scar and some ticks.
I don't like going out in the cod.
[Kim] Best stay by the fir and arm up.
I recommend a hot water battle.
[ZK] What is a hot water battle doing in a "Lost Consonants Cat Room"?
I am supposed to go to a wedding tomorrow but I don't really know the room and the brie is awful.
[st d] Maybe the bet man will be a bit of a chancer?
ZK may think we are laying a "Swupped Vawuls Chit Roam", which is a hit idea.
[Oh goody - a shiny new game and I've just finished work] Talking of Christmas presents, I'm buying my nephew a cockwork rainset.
What about some inky toys as well, Chalks?
Or how about a rocking hose?
I'm getting my nephew a Nintendo Gae Boy.
I tied for an Acton Man but he wasn't interested.
I've bought a Laystation 2, but it's not all it's cracked up to be.
My niece is learning to tell the time and since she has a big room I'm getting her a big inflatable cock.
I'm thinking of getting Korky Jnr a couple of rucks for his toy solder collection.
I know what you mean, Dave, my -Box is always laying around.
I'm not an imaginitive person, so I'll probably just give VDs for Christmas.
[Ibid] What a perfect git! (Oh I know I've used it before, so what?!!) My neices want tokes. They can go hopping and hose a book themselves from the sore.
I cannot stand the thought of all this hopping though I don't mind the January ales.
Hat can I get my boyfiend? A C layer maybe...
Angus] C layers are a little out of date. He may already have a mini-dik.
I would get a mini-dik, but I doubt I'd be able to get it to wok.
I'm definitely with Ibid on this one. I hope Santa brings me a VD player!
I'd get CDs, but I can't think of a single bad I'd like to ear.
Well, you could always go for the classics like Bur, David Boie and The Beales. Classic female siners are particularly popular at the moment and include Kate Bus, Toi Amos and Luu. If you are looking for something a little more mainsteam try Briney Spears, The Suababes, Pin and Cheryl Cow.
[BtD]Good choices! But a bit mainstream. How about those cousins, the Kins Of Leon, Turin Bakes, or the White Tripes? All very tasty!
Call me old-fashioned, but I like the Rolling tones.
[Kim] Bit sow on the old uptake there, sorry.
The Cash are quite good, but they haven't been about in ages. In any case, I preferred pop groups, like AA. They almost achieved word domination.
And let's not forget the singers who've been around forever - take Od Stewart as an example.
...and let's not forget the Artit formally known as Price.
Or Ink Flod.
Enough of these chat-topping lists! What about mood music? The sort you'd mooch to?
What sort of moo? A goo moo, or something on a bit of a doner? There's lots of kinds of sogging sog. (Wok that out.)
Or if you mean easy litening, there's always the likes of Any Willias.
Bit of a fan of We We We as it happens.
I quite like Wetlie myself
How about something with bagpies?
Nothing better than a bagpie ban arching along to 'Amazing Race'.
...nor the stirring sound of the massed pies and rums of the cots guards
I just adore the Iliary Aoo (work that one out!)
I ate bagpies.
[penelope] Even though when they're being payed you can see what a Scotsman really wears under his kit?
[Rab] I heard it was y-frots. And that's a sight I don't really want to see.
I heard nothing was won under the kit!
Is it true that a scotsman has sat in his porridge?
[Thos] I don't believe that's the origin of the brown hit.
It's not often these days you see a Scotsman brandishing his long dik.
Having said tat, no words or other harp tings should be waved about in pubic places.
Someboy could get hur.
Still trying to wok out long dik...
It's a type of log-laded agger.
Aah...now I et it.
And don't forget haggis. Tastes as goo as it sounds.
I'm also looking forward to New Ears Day.
and oxing day.
I bet I will get another rap CD from someone.
You could always fog it on eay.
My friends aren't that fond of New Ears. They always get a hagover.
The Sots enjoy it. They go fist fooing.
The spirit self in my cupboard is full of randy bottles.
I like a cool bee, my wife will have a GI with Toni.
I thought it was New Ears Ee hen parties wee, not New Ears Day.
BB] Toni goes down so well.
Christmas is my favorite - all those pesents.
[St.D, BB] Others' ruin, didn't they used to call it?
[PP] I hate Yue
Its the cackers that annoy me. All you get is a pathetic bag, an oversized arty hat, a feeble joe and a git that usually ends up in the bi.
I always like to see the Queens peech
At 3pm? We're usually still owning drinks at that time. Our fast comes later, when we're really amished. I eat my spouts first!
pen] I have heard you like to get your mouth around Russell's Spout.
I always think that arsnips make a welcome addition to the man meal.
It takes more than a little sill to coo a turke properly.
I usually have hot mice pies for desert.
[st d] Not alf.
[Dazed5] Oooh, yes! Mice pies with randy butter! Yum!
I'm told that my own bred sauce goes down a teat - it's the favour of love.
I don't eat mat, so I'll go for a stuffed arrow with mice tar to follow.
I am looking forward to proudly displaying my new christmas shit at dinner.
st dog] If comes from M&S, it is sure to be quite turdy.
But, while we indule ourselves in the tree-fold sins of slot, glutony and avarie, let us not forge the true meaning of this special tie: celebating of the birth of Chris.
I know the tory about the birth of Chris! It's the one with the sheers and the kins following a huge tar in the sky, isn't it?
[Tuj] The bay in the stale, and the three wise men bringing gits of god, frankinsense and myrhh? I though it was a fair tory. I never believed it myself.
Back in those pre compuetr days, there was never any ROM at the Inn.
... so they had to RAM themselves into a table.
They say in the bile a savour is born.
Stale, bile, gits, a ravelling tar and all the gusts filling up the inn to see the savour - sounds like a tall tory.
[pen] There is Ruth in the goo book!
Everyone ought all heir resents yet? The hops get crowed if you leave it too late.
No resents his ear - well, early one. My bother, siter and I agreed a few ears ago to give to goo causes instead, so the only resents are or my bay gil and my eices.[pen]Yes, the goo boo is rue!
I'll probably do most of my hopping at Luewater this ear.
I see that Cliff Richard is set to release another hit record this Christmas.
*cuckling at Bob* HM's aiming to shit several thousand copies of that in its winter ale.
I be The Darkness it the number one pot. All this talk of the 'goo boo'... well ruthfully, I ever read it.
When you hear it, the Christmas number one is almost always the pis. The best way of avoiding it is, when it starts to lay, tell everyone you have got a violet crap and need a wak outside.
Bob] I hear this year it will be a rap record.
It'll make you omit your turkey.
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