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World's Worsest
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Start with World's Worst Chat Up Lines, till it wears out then start a new topic.
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"My licence is in the plastic pouch at the front, officer, the twenty quid is in the zipped bit at the back."
"psssssst! Ever DID IT in the backseat of a patrol car?" *[wink] * [wink]*"
I only had tee martoonis, ossifer - really!
Come on, get to the point; I'm dying for a piss.
Ooh, fancy that, officer! Aren't you the same cop who had vice squad duty last week and booked me for solicitation?
Now , now! You wouldn't ticket a poor disabled person, would you? I'm colour blind, you see. Red light, green light... makes no difference whatsoever to me.
As far as I was concerned the light was green. You say it was red. Well, that's a relativistic approach velocity for you. Nothing wrong in that, is there?
Does your head go right to the top of that hat?
On my word as a gent *hiccle* a gent *hiccle* man I hoin't been *hic* droinking orifice *hic* sir. In fact I am suffering such an orful deficit of the subshtituance I am *hic* halu *hic* halu *hic* inating and being convinced I am having sunstroke I am embracing this mirage in my dieing moments by confishcuing this camel to deliver me to the oasis. *hic*
Oink
Chill, man.
Want a toke on this?
You've left your engine running. And your mobile's just gone off.
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