It was so nice and thoughtful of you to pass me that dish with all the money in it during the service. It will make a most wonderful addition to my coin and banknote collection back home in Thailand.
"Erm.... s'cuse me parson, I don't mean to be interruptive of your indoctrination of us miserable sinners but your sermon has been a grueling one up to the moment and a man builds a thirst sitting here made to sweat like dear Ol' Job in these dusty pews. Could we maybe have a short intermission and you have them pretty choir girls pass out the libations!"
Umm.., Father, could you please settle an issue for us? My friend Tom here and I have a bet going on whether priests wear anything under their frocks. I was right about, and won our last bet on Scotsmen and kilts.
Those were some neat names you thought up for that story you told. Shadrach...Meshach...Abednago...Nebuchadnezzzar. I'll use them as characters the next time I play Dungeons and Dragons.
Rattlesnakes! Rattlesnakes for the true believers! Everybody, gather round, get your Rattlesnakes here! Don't be shy sister, jes' reach your hand waaaaay down deep in the bag, that be whar the jedgemental ones are........"