[CdM] ... and I hope you all admired my cunning disguise when I came to the Pilg.

[CdM] ... and another thing. It was kind of you to refer to a 61 year old as "middle-aged".

Boolbar was born in Jamaica in 1932 and works as a kipper skinner with other escaped convicts aboard the ‘Jolly Badger’, a fishing vessel docked in Northampton for tax reasons. Trade is not good, so he spends much of his time surfing the internet and plucking his bikini line in preparation for his cabaret act - impersonating Justin Timberlake. Fast approaching his 72nd birthday, he is suprisingly popular, especially with lady farmers.

Shy, retiring, modest St Dogmael, a clergyman, samaritan in his spare time, amateur volekeeper, world-renowned horsebrass collector and prosthetic leg fitter to the stars, would rather lurk than post, rather agree than argue, rather defer to authority than cause a fuss, and never, never causes offence to anyone. Unfortunately, there's a nasty name spoofer in these MC pages who keeps representing himself as St Dog, St D.* (regular expression) etc., and who is getting the Saint a bad name. And you know what happens when you give St Dog a bad name... I put it down to an over-developed sensitivity to the Velcro fasteners that hold his brolly closed, myself.

Ah, the good doctor, who, like his tardis-travelling namesake, can be found virtually in any place at any time. Erudite, learned, witty, with nary a hint of the malice, agression or repressed hostility that seems so often to pervade the contributions of many of his fellow toilers in the fertile linguistic vineyard that is MC, he straddles the virtual multiverse like a Titan, needing to make nothing more than a comment here and there, the odd line of verse and occasionally an MC move of such subtelty and finess as to defy analysis, to leave us mere mortals quailing and floundering in the bow wave of the battleship of his intellect. Such a pity that his real name's Malcolm and that he's the assistant manager of Beaumont Beds in Lewisham High Street.