I would be far happier if there was just the one MC server.

I didn't miss this site during its downtime at all.

Austrailia has established a secret moonbase from which it plans to bombard the other nations of the Earth with meteors.

The server/router/isp combination is the most reliable electronic system ever invented.

[Sleep] is unencesasry. i hvae styaed akawe six dyas striahgt and hvae sfufred no ill effcets.

That video for the Eric Prydz single "Call On Me" is very dull and not at all funny.

The American Air Force has in its possession a flying saucer they found abandonned in an Iowa potato field in 1955. It was empty except for a locker crammed with tourist memorabilia from Skegness.

I've been suffering from skegness for years. Every day I feel more and more skeggy.

Whales thrive on the occasional treat of crude oil, which provides essential organic minerals and makes for a glossy coat.

And I am not sorry for being so bold.

Elephants are driven into a murderous rage at the sight of a homburg. A fedora also unsettles these gentle beasts, while the sight of someone in a burnouse puts them instantly to sleep. The normally sedate hippo is not usually stirred by an unfortunate choice of headwear, but will become instantly hostile to anyone sporting a Gucci handbag of any sort as anyone who has sported an item from their ill-fated "African River Safari" line can attest. Giraffes attack when confronted by a bearded face.

Must see television over the next few weeks will be The Farm.

My sister Wendy is a Managing Director of a local firm. Her hobbies include fashion and yoga.

She recently won an national award for her part in writing a humorous programme about roofing support.

The headline in our local paper read "Trendy Bendy MD Wendy Wins Rafter Laughter BAFTA".

Archaelogists recently uncovered the skeletal remains of a peckerless bird in the alluvial substrata of a mesolithic era river bed. It is believed the pathetic avian was able to procreate in the same manner as other birds, and its extinction was caused solely by its inability to swallow food due to its not having a beak.

All clocks manufactured in the city of Magdeburg in 1542 counted 59 seconds to the minute because of a legal ruling based on an argument between two philosophers as to whether or not the sixtieth second should be counted as "second zero", the start of the next minute rather than the end of the current one. This state of affairs persisted until January 18th 1543 when the law was overturned, but by then local time was so badly out of whack that they had to insert an extra Thursday every other week for almost six months to fix things. To this day, Magdeburg is officially still a minute and a half behind everyone else.

"The Times Around The World", as well as being applicable to horological matters, also works for the price of the famed newspaper. Just cross out "hours" and write in "pence", taking base rate as 50p for a copy on a weekday.