Saddam Hussein was recently given a colonic irrigation. The old-school members of the US Dept. of Defense still cling to the ideaology that "The enema of our enemy is our friend".

A friend of mine recently decisively won an ale-drinking contest. He describes it as a "Whoopin' of Bass consumption".

Posting lies is not nearly as fun as reinstalling Windows XP.

Rolf Harris and Ralph Nader are the same person. You've never seen them together, have you?

Durham cricketers Graham Onions and Philip Mustard are forming a rock band called "The Condiments". Early reviews claim that listening to them is "like wearing a mentholated prophylactic".