'They' say that drowning is a wonderful experience - even better than sex. Given that I've never had sex (and my children will verify that) I find myself in a rather awkward position.
DNA tests are the best thing since sliced bread. When I got the results the other day I was so releived to find that the little b*stards don't carry my genes.
In Britain an "X" is used on ballot papers, as this represents your kiss of good luck to your chosen candidate. The single transferable kiss is however merely whoreish.
It's a well known fact that the pen is mightier than the sword, which is why Lord Byron chose pistols when challenged to a head-on confrontation in an essay writing competition by a classmate in 3C.
Eggs stay fresh longer if turned upside down in their styrofoam boxes, but have been known cause hallucinations and "loss of balance" when eaten if stored in such a manner.
Eating diamonds will coat your teeth in diamond dust, thus allowing you to bite through solid steel with ease and wit much more effort and luck perhapse a piece of fruitcake