I used to be part of a team of venetian blind salesman, but then my boss said it was curtains for all of us.

I was once an elevator attendant, but after I while I realised that the owners were giving me the shaft.

I was a watchmaker but I left because the boss kept winding me up.

[FG} Funny that. I worked for a watchmaker once, but I left because I kept getting run down.

I was a weather forecaster for a while, but left under a cloud.

I used to be really good at this game before we started discussing our career history.

I used to be a display waterskier, but they cut me loose.

When I realised my job on an old-fashioned railway wasn't for me, I left under my own steam.

I tried dairy farming for a while, but after a drought, I left for greener pastures.

I also tried being an attendant on the QE2, but I missed the boat.

I switched then to selling face make up, but the work was so stressful, I took a powder.

My boyfriend ran into some trouble with the law and took a job on a sheep farm. He finally left because he didn't want them to know he was on the lam.

Then he worked bottling apertifs, but was terminated for excessive absinthe.

I used to work as a flaggelator, necrophiliac and bestialist, until I realised I was just flogging a dead horse.

I then became an army bandsman, but they let me go because (they said) I was marching to the beat of a different drum.

I also tried being a tyre salesman, but now I'm on the skids.

I used to sell DIY equipment, but I throw a spanner in the works by getting hammered, completely plastered. It was a wrench to leave. I felt I was left on the shelf. I saw myself being screwed by the job market. Luckily I got a new job and can paint myself a better future.

I thought I would do well in the undertaking business, but I was passed over for promotion.

I once owned a shoe store. Since I couldn't really give myself the boot, I decided it'd be best if I just soled out.

I had a job installing traffic calming measures but eventually I got the hump.

I had a job on a wind farm but I blew it.