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The Banter Page
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If you're wanting to get something off your chest, make general comments about the server, or post lonely hearts ads, then this is the place for you.
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Mad? Me? Who says I'm mad? Mad am I? That's what those fools said in medical school. Could a madman do this? Hahahahahaaaa!!!!
[FG] Not wanting to bore on this topic any more than necessary, but yes, the more engrossed I am in something the less OCD I am, and the less, the more, if you see what I mean. But I think this applies to everyone to some degree. Aristotle says that the only people who eat sweets at the theatre are those who are bored by the play, the point being that there's no such thing as generic "pleasure", but rather each activity has its own pleasure, and the more engaged you are in an activity, the more you enjoy it. In other words, you can't completely enjoy two things at once, because they will compete for your attention; and conversely, if you aren't enjoying something, your mind will try to find something else to enjoy. Discuss.
I'm bored, too
Heavy, saucer-shaped object they throw in athletics competitions. Discus. sorrysorrysorry
Fidgeting
I can't sit still, especially in things that I'm required to sit still for. My mum refuses to sit by me at the theatre as i'm constantly shuffling in my seat and my boyfriend clobbers me when i fidget whilst sat next to him at the cinema. Its not cos I'm bored (as I'm often accused of) I just get un-comfy so feel the need to move.
numb-bum
[Lib] I find lot of theatre and cinema seats are rather uncomfortable at about the one hour stage. Shuffling is somewhat necessary.
stretchy legs
[Lib]I try to sit in the front row or on an aisle seat - more leg room that way.
Chat
Apparently, the MCiOS chat room does work for me at work. This is good. I should be along on Monday, meetings permitting.
The Kiki Thing
[FG] I know what you mean. I find some meetings to be similarly frustrating.
Hats
[st d] It's a wooly hat. It was on the floor. It was knitted by my mum with big thick wool and consequently (a) stands up on its own, and (b) has holes in it especially a nice one in the top. I managed to get a cigarette wedged in the hole, pointing vertically, and then attempted to balance another one on top of that, and so on. Quite a challenge actually, I never made it further than one on top of another.
Fag balancing
I remember a book by Julian Barnes in which someone lies on her back and smokes a cigarette all the way down without tapping it out, so that a thin grey column of ash is balanced perilously on top of her lips. She then reveals that she had stuck a hairpin down the length of the cigarette before lighting it to hold it together. If I knew how to smoke, I'd use that trick to impress girls.
If I knew...
[BM] Surely there must be some evening class you can go to.
For some reason I thought BM was going to give us the low-down on the ping-pong ball scene from Priscilla Queen Of The Desert. Its a great trick for impressing the boys...
ping pong
Oh how I laughed... What's the trick? It's dead easy!
What the?
After running in the high teens and low twenties, the weather has turned = 36°C as I type. Urrgh. Don't get me wrong, I am happy with that - it's tonight I'm worried about.
Someone broke the weather
That's interesting, here on the east end of the US we've had the opposite problem - High of 60ºF and low of 30 one day, high of 30 and snow the very next day.
Ping Pong
[BtD] Oh, if only I knew the low-down on that...
[Dujon] Where do you live?
talking of the weather...
It's a cracking day here in the mid-south of dear old Blighty... an azure blue sky, fluffy while cloudy things and lots of smiley faces .. especially on rugby fans.. Kinda makes me glad to be alive.
Outlook uncertain...
Lovely day here in mid UK too. I wonder what Edinburgh will be like?
Embraclime
According to my guest from that fine city, it's been warmer and drier than Manchester. Though that doesn't surprise me.
A porridge of high pressure
rab] Good. I shall bring mt Bermuda kilt!
for mt read my.
A boys weekend
Not only was the weather good here but the wife (and mother of three) left on Friday for a weekend of shopping with some of her friends, returning after tea today. Just a quick tidy up half hour before she arrived...a free weekend of no 'lists of thing-to-do', no 'we can't sit around here all day', just coke,crisps, playstation and the occasional nappy...easy.

Meanwhile over at Celebrity MC mini league Chalky takes over from DrQ at No 1, and staight in at No3 is the mysterious x_sugarbabe_x

slacking off and daq-ing off
[Inkspot] Lovely! I managed to grab about three hours of my own company this afternoon. I built a log fire and sprawled in front of the TV. Grand.
Re: Celebdaq ... yes, that daughter of mine is going to be SO smug when she sees how well she's performing. Strangely enough - I put all my pounds on the same person as she did after divi-time last Friday .. and today she has somehow managed to get ahead of me. Beginner's luck I say.
dak dik dak dik _ dak dak dik dak

Grumbles something about 'children these days!' and heads for the shed.
to do lists
Inkspot] Sounds like you should make her a list with: 1.leave me alone Please ! and 2. Stop making me lists and: 3. realise that not only CAN he sit around all day and do nothing, but he finds it remarkably therapeutic.
cross-posting
[To all Radio4 listeners] 1830 GMT tonight is the first of the new series of ISIHaC from Winchester. I'm hoping to hear myself laughing.
wish lists
Chalky]Three hours in a single afternoon? to yourself? Now that's sounds wonderful, I'll exchange you that for my Tom the toddler ("Read books daddy", "Do puzzle daddy", "Train track...", "Play cars...")The other two being 9 and 12 can be left to their own devices.

On second thoughts ignore that, I wouldn't change him for anything...
st d] It's not the just lists but the silent looks, perhaps Chalky could give some insight ;)

A plea
Why are there only two of us playing Mornington Crescent? :(
annoyed glares
[Inkspot] Doubt if I can share any insights, not knowing if the lists/silent looks are aimed at your role as a husband [B&Q, DIY, manly household chores] or father [guidance & gainful occupation of young things]. To be honest, I'm a fan of the school of 'sitting round all day at home with the TV/video/DVD/Playstation/CDplayer/piano/PC/Internet' especially when there's little ink smudges to look after.
Children actually enjoy sharing stay-at-home-stuff with relaxed adults.
I think there's far too much - [oh dear - high horse alert] - "Oh yah, to develop their full potential, little Venetia and young Felix are always occupied with ballet, moderndance, jazz/tap dancing, drama, horseriding, t'ai chi, judo, karate, kick boxing, cordon bleu vegetarian cookery, screen printing, blah-de-blah classes and isn't my 4-wheel drive so handy for running them around in?" Bollocks to all that. As long as they walk regularly, go swimming as often as possible, and actually spend some time with their parents, they usually turn out OK.
[Ahem - that is, provided their parent/parents are normal :-)]
adults
Hurrah! A non-neurotic parenting-type! Any room on that horse for the rest of us?
zk
Maybe they've got us on ignore...
ignorami
[AP] No chance Pet! I'm assuming that most of the 'onliners' last evening were in the chat server in MCiOS. I even leapt off my high horse to join 'em.
late chat
[Chalky] Ah, the pantomime. I was still chuckling about it even as I wwent to bed. There were a few more characters that I forgot to own up to... although this may have been before you came in. I was also the rocket and the Qualified Master Sofa Assembly Technician (who was ejected into high orbit when CdM pressed the eject button on the old sofa).
guffawing
[pen] Wonderful stuff - if I'd had more wits about me [or less vino IN me] I would have worked out how you managed that without my noticing. *plots fiendish strategy for next time*
Ah-ha!!
[pen] So it was you!! I think flerdle must have been the Door-to-Door salesperson - no idea who the monkeys were though. And I wasn't impersonating anyone. It was all I could do to keep myself upright on the chair most of the time. I wish I could have stayed :-/
*innocent*
I wasn't anybody other than myself. And I stayed to the very end. Seven hours in all. *was insane*
Oh, and I did get work done today. Honest, guv.
chatty
I was planning to do stuff last night, but so much for that.. :)
owning up
I was the Door-to-Door Salesman and one of the Shakespear-quoting monkeys - although I'm not sure who the other one was. I was sniggering so hard throughout I had aching ribs and cheeks by the end of the evening. As a form of laughter therapy, I reckon that would cure anything :o)
two windows
[Chalky] You just have two chat rooms windows open side-by-side. At one stage I had three - there was me as penelope, the (Retired) Firework Salesman, and the rocket, which fortunately didn't stay in the room very long as I was having trouble keeping track of what was what by that stage.
Regrets
It was a riot. I really wish I could have stayed, but playing from work and trying to work is too difficult for my brain to cope with.
roles
I was just me. Oh, and the IKEA delivery person, of course. And my apologies to everyone for being so non-communicative -- I kept getting tied up in these long work phone calls that required my brain.
I missed this. Will another be arranged?
[BM] It seemed like Monday night was a good night to meet, so it may happen, to a larger or smaller extent, any Monday from here on in. Or any other time. I think some people might be there this Saturday afternoon too. Check here for other announcements of a gathering-type nature.
chatroom
How does one find the chatroom?
Over yonder
Tina] On the MC5 front page there is a link to Orange and MCiOS, under the clock, click on "the Real time chat server Beta", enter your name. Whatever you do, don't press the red button!
chatroom
Thanks Inkspot.
What a load of fucking crap this site is, compared to Pants. No wonder I've left
Refusing to accept that that was the 'real' Rosie.
My apologies - that should have read:
Now, where was I?
Ah, yes. I shall endeavour to join those who may partake of the delights of the 'chat room' next Monday - I shall most likely be a wee bit late (assuming I make it at all) as 8pm on Monday to most of you is 7am to me on Tuesday.
monkey-business
[penelope] The other monkey was Phil.
simian episodes
[flerdle] Phil, was it? Cheeky monkey. He was poking fun at me all night. Just tell him I know where his pub is...
EEEEEEEEK!
My Celebdaq went all pink and has Simon Cowell on it! GAAAAAAAH!
Backchat
Sorry I was unavailable on Monday. I was engaged in an alternative form of chat with Bob the dog. It was a bizarre experience - there was no delay between send and receipt of message, furthermore the conversation didn't get out of synch with itself and we were able to teleport alcoholic beverages to one another in real time. I don't think my brain can cope with the sensory overload, and I'll have to revert to the old-fashioned style next week.
Brooms
Oh... and I feel it might be time to get the brooms out and cobweb away some of the games that are starting to putrify. Someone want to set the ball rolling?
Sweeping
I placed a fairly strong hint in the Carpe Diem game, though no-one seems to want to be The One Who Finished A Game.
Clang!
Just dropped another hint in the Centurion game.
Marvellous
Those were the two that were at the top of my list for treatment. So folks - remember the rules: revivals of old classics require a case for support.
alternative form of chat
Rab] Most enjoyable. Would be very happy to attempt further teleportations at some point in the future. Conference over, I am now sitting in an internet cafe in Waverly station awaiting my 8 hour train journey home.
New Game] never contributed but always enjoyed the longwinded game on !York...
Huit heures
[Bob] Do you have a bit of a long onward journey at your destination (as train conductors like to put it)? I wouldn't have thought it would take that long to get to where you're going...
Please, please, please, please, please?
There is a spare game slot. Would anyone mind if I started up a Lost Consonants Cat Room, so as to get out of the darkened cupboard that is the old game on MCiOS?
[Im] Well I dot min at all.
*hands Kim a torch and firmly shuts the cupboard door* I'm kidding!! I jet!
.. and now for the game of Mornington Crescent
Although there are plenty of MC variants scattered around the other two sites, might it not be appropriate to use one of the two available slots in here for a new one? We only have the Long Game. Perhaps an Imposters version of some sort ... like Literary giants? Or an old classic that I'm not aware of.
Guests
I think there's two slots, so we could accomodate both Kim and Chalky.
acknowledging
Hmmm rab .. I think I'll wait to see if there's any support for my idea, or even an alternative suggestion/theme, eg. a couple of weeks ago, Huxley mentioned [in MCiOS?] the Worldwide Underground Station map which drew some favourable murmers. Mind you, I haven't seen him around much lately.
[Chalky] Indeed - there was that; also I recall (possibly) Boolbar suggesting a story game in which each player pastiches an author of his or her choice. This could be interesting...
Oddly....
...it appears that someone has decided for the masses. Oh, and the worldwide map was from me. The author game was each player "plays" an author continuing the ongoing story in their own style and trying to introduce their own characters and elements whilst removing the other authors stuff. A sort of Authors Tag Wrestling.
Yeah - what's that all about? Sound charades is up and running at Orange so there's no need for it here.
Also both new games violate the principle expounded 11 moves up. Does anyone ever actually read these things?
deciding for the masses
I just created 2 new games, cos I felt like it, which was actually purely coincidental. I wasn't trying to undermine any of the ideas on here, I promise!!! I didn't know about the sound charades at orange cos this is the only site I use *slinks away in to the corner feeling very very ashamed*
Resolution
Comments from the floor please...
Oh dear. I've just spent ages combining my and Boobar's idea into an amusing posting for here, in a blatant attempt to 'sell' the idea - now it's all gone to waste. Humph. ?

Sorry ZK ... nothing personal :-)

reading back a bit ....
I'm afraid I had a crack at you [ZK] in the Balls Game - sorry if it seemed a bit snappy. As you're probably feeling uncomfortable about the whole thing- would you like rab to 'retract' the new games, then we can go back to where we were in the discussion process?
[rab] Is that possible?
Um...
[Chalky] It might involve closing the site for a few minutes, cos although in principle I know how to do it, in practice there could be traps for the unwary... (mostly because I've not had to do it before).
Surely you can just play MC to end the games....
end the games
well - shall we just 'end' the new games before they've begun, by using the magic words .. or does that mess up the Modern Classics archive bit?
simul-posted
[Boobar] Sorry - I simul-ed. And apologies for not crediting you with the World Map of Underground Stations a little while ago :-)
AGAIN!
Jeeeeeez - I've apologised 4 times in the last half-hour.
Sorry.
[Chalky] I'm sorry to hear about your apologising problem. I hope it isn't catching!
Endings
[rab] Trust me - you do not want to be in a position where you have to learn how to retract games rapidly.
Sorry to interrupt, by the way.
Other Endings
I'm seriously wondering whether we should end the Lies game, not because it is moribund but almost precisely because it isn't: have it go out on a high, so to speak.

thinks: I wonder if there is legs in games which never end, but which automatically drop off the front page if unused. Kind of half games which don't count against the game limit but which would be, as it were, already won when they're started. Hmm...

Phantom games
As long as people don't mind there being weird zero-move games in the archive, then not formally erasing them from the database gets my vote. I think I know how to remove things as though they never existed, but that's all a bit sinister and not very nice.
So...
A new game slot! What shall we do with it?
The Authorised Version
[Boolbar] Going back to the Authors .. *thinks* .. combine my Imposters MC idea with Boobar's pastiche using both writers/poets AND characters from literature - such as:
'William Shakespeare:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
Thus Shoreditch tavern proffers alms to me.
Bridget Jones:
Gah to your poxy tavern Willy-boy! The off-license in Shepherds Bush has a token collection scheme for cut-price chardonnay.'

OK - so perhaps my example is a bit crap, but you get the gist?

I have to say, I'm favouring the MC Game idea more than the continuous story - only because the recent StoryGame in MCiOS took off like a rocket and fizzled into the ether rather too quickly.

Or - gasp - you could have a story game with no MC connections at all...
backing off
rab - wasn't that the style of the MCiOS one I mentioned above? Whatever - I've made enough noise for one day - I'm still relatively new to this site and wouldn't presume to start a new game in any case. There must be all sorts of great and original ideas from the afficionados out there :-)
sotto voce
Quickfire Patience Mornington Crescent while we're waiting, anyone?
pen...
someone called ? :oD woof woof !
New games
Oh, please, not a longwinded game! I still haven't recovered from the last one. Over a year on, and I haven't yet even had the strength to open the folder it's all compiled in, and see if I want to actually try and make it into a proper novel.
I have always fancied the idea of a Who do you do? kind of game - moves in the style of famous (or obscure, in my case) authors - I tried to get the recent MCiOS story game moving in that direction, but there were few takers. I'd quite like to play a standard game of MC at some point - there seem to be only the Long Games going on atm.
But maybe there's an entirely new game out there somewhere, and all it needs is a little inspiration...

But not from me, obviously.

Pisces
I should perhaps iterate that our resident custodian of exotic fauna (trans. Zooological Keeper) is of course still welcome to ply his or her trade in these grounds. Today's little flurry of activity should not be taken as a signal of any animosity or resentment. I am merely keen to see a selection of games that will keep a reasonable number of people moderately happy for an undeterminable length of time. My personal stance (for that be the box into which I type) is that variety and originality are two virtues that have been shown to achieve that aim. I would say we don't always need a committee decision before starting a new game if the idea is particularly unusual/cute/timely/whatever; on the other hand, since slots tend to be at a premium (and I see no need to raise the limit1), it's probably a good idea - particularly with the those that come round often - to see if at least a couple of others are up for it. </Jerry's_Final_Thought> *group hug*

[1] Unless offered huge wads of cash, or favours to a similar value.

Gosh, people have figured out how to use the words "Mornington Crescent"...
Activity! Well done folks, a bit of pruning never hurt anybody. Or maybe it did, but as long as their in the minority, they'll have to lump it.
Re: the remaining slot, some sort of impostors, or in fact any of several of the suggestions above'd do. If anyone can think of anything new and exciting, go for that.
Re: what pen said, is it worth filling the time with a quick MC bash? An eleven-move puzzle one'd be what I'd post if it's still free soon.
more stories
I would be in favour of one of the story game, but with the rider that each is a short between 10-15 moves, roundabout 100 words a posting (not written in stone). Looking at the recent games of this type there is an initial flurry followed by a slow death. By reinventing a topic every several moves could allow various impostered authors amemding the style to suit. As I'm not widely read I may need to come as a character Dennis the Menace!

In other news Celebdaq is back up and I've finally made to the Players Chart front page...at No 30. Still along way to go to beat penelope who managed No6.

Errr....
[rab and all] I know I'm only fairly new around here and I don't want to tread on any toes. I think that Rab is absolutely right in that a proposal for any new game should be able to demonstrate some support. I think, from my last posting, that I have support from Penelope and Boolbar and an accommodation from Rab, so, unless there are howls of disapproval in the meantime (or some other basard nabs the slot, I will start it up tomorrow morning (GMT).
Celebdaq
Does anyone else absolutely hate the new Celebdaq look? It's bloody annoying..
the end of the list..
You know the game right down at the bottom - the one called 'oooh, I wanna try this'? Well, I've broken it. I didn't start it, btw, and I have no idea who Jack O'Neill is, but I was demonstrating and, rab, I'm sorry, it came away in my hand.
Daq
[snorgle] I don't mind it all - to be honest I found the old one somewhat dark for my liking.
Celebcaq!
[Dujon]I liked that retro look. I don't like my new icons, either. *pouts*
Game ideas
I like story games. But they tend to work best when:
a) all moves are around 1 line each (I'd point to the long-lived Film & Crescent series on !York if !York were up)
b) the moves are anonymous (e.g. this one, maybe because of multiple movers)

But I'd also like a round of "Misheard Lyrics". A bit like Spellcheck Songs (remember that from !York?), except we rewrite chosen songs using soundalike words (not lookalike words). The last game was popular, as long as we kept the songs short

Query
Hmm, some nice stuff in that referenced game, MF. The song bastardisation - how did that work? That is, one line per post or the whole kit and caboodle? This sort of thing, or am I missing the point?

"My Way" (Frank Sinatra)

Kow-tow, they send the beer;
Ah so I'll brace for the coming burton.
Please lend, me some buckshee
To save my face, or it's the slate on....

Yes, I know it's not good - just off the top of the head stuff: but is that the idea?

Eggs sealant!
Eck! Sacked Lee, thee I'd hear!
I said in the original, "write as much as you feel like"; Blob usually went and wrote the whole kit and caboodle. Gimme a sec...
That should do it...
Try here
Hmm, 4 minutes isn't bad!
Interesting

Thank you for your trouble

Sorry for the delay - I've been fighting the Geocities' pop-ups. ... :-)

Do you think it will work? There seemed to be few contributors on that one - although, even though I'm terrible with lyrics, it sounds intriguing.

After the storm
[Chalky] Reading up a lot (my word, you people typed a lot today) I've tried to find this game you had a crack at me in, but can't, so no offence taken! :)
[Duj]
thank you, yes, yes and yes. Like I said, if people kept their contributions (and the songs) short, it'd go better. And, hey, the new-found PantsMC talent'll make short work of the whole thing!
'avin' a fink
Well, I'm not going to wax lyrical about the thought so, being somewhat backward about coming forward in these matters, I shall await further comments. Given that it's early morn in the U.K. at the moment I'm assuming that any critiques will not be posted until such time as a few hours have passed us by.
Early morning
Must...go...to...sleep....
Nods
New game
So, will someone fill the slot with a game that more than one person actually wants to play before some oh so hilarious wankwit comes along and starts one with a ridiculous winning move?
Nods
The job puns seem to have gone down well on the lies game. I think this warrents a game of its own so we can all get on with bullshitting as ...so help me God intended. Unless there is an outcry in the next 15 minutes - this I will do.
Rab] 7 and a half hours to get to Stratford from Embra. Home at last - and knackered.
Dons
[Bob] Oof... don't I feel terribly northern with a mere 4 hour trek? I trust your shennanigan met an appropriate level of success.
Jobsworth
[BtD] Surely we've overdone the job puns? - we need a different thingy to get our teeth into.
shennanigans
rab] my input was particularly successful, although the conference created a huge amount of controversy...
Bool] Yes I agree, but I still think it could carry on in a themed way - e.g. relatives, the wild west, puddings etc.
recall of parliament
Has there been agreement between Lost Consonants Cat Room and a story type game

make that one more for the Lost Consnants

*raises had for lot consonants*
thirded
I agree on lost cosnants - but I still think it is time the lie game got back to some good ol' bollocks - hmmm...
Quoracy?
Would anyone lie to do the honours? I'm not very good at witty tiles.
Another hit game has begun...
In the pink
[Celebdaq] I like it, a lot more clear and easy to use. The colours could be a little less pink though. What surprised me is that I'm 4th after a pathetic % increase.
Kak 'daq
Sorry - I think the new look's utter pants (no connection with defunct MC site intended). And it's bloody slow, as well...
CelebDrag
I'll agree on the slow bit.
Cyber pilg
How did it go? Will there be more?
chattermongers
[Bob] Mayhem and insanity - and yes :-)
If you can be bothered there's some postings in here a couple of pages back.
please ignore my dreadful grammar
*resists urge to make a horrific pun*
Boo!
I wanted to call it: "Lost Consonants: this time its persona!"
woooooooooooooooo
It's pretty quiet in here - mind you, my home computer has fallen over and can't get up, so I can only access from work for now..*sniff*
Wakey-wakey
[snorgle] I'd wondered where you'd been...

[all] Good weekend?

Weekend Loveliness
It was until I was awoken at 2:30 am this morning by a mouse which sounded like it was tearing floorboards apart with its teeth.
Rugby club bonanza
Boolbar] Are you sure it wasn't a giant, white, unbearably cute mouse?
I had a good weekend apart from the R A I N. I was also vaguely aware of England’s rugby victory (I found out on Sunday morning) - which was pleasant. What was unpleasant, however, was Christmas shopping on Sunday and having to tip-toe through a minefield of pavement-pizzas - a memento of local folks celebrations.
Weekend
Mac Expo on Friday afternoon, where I picked up a copy of Panther (MacOS 10.3), followed by spending the weekend in a hotel on a personal development course. Someone announced the rugby result at some point, and half the people went "YES!" and the other half "hm?". 20-17 in the last twenty seconds of extra time, apparently.
hm?
Raak] Do you feel personally developed as a result of your course?
Ooops - re reading that it sounds dreadfully rude - I didn't mean to be. What I mean was ...erm ..well, what is a personal development course?
personally developmented
[Raak] I would love to hear more. When I worked on a national newspaper many moons ago - they sent a group of us on one of those weekends. If I remember correctly, it was a hoot. I'm wondering if 2003 methods are less ... ahem ... aggressively american.
ISIHaC - round 2
Tonight at 1830 GMT. It was much funnier than the first episode broadcast last week.
Are we meeting tonight?
ce soir
[Rab] Usual tme, usual place. I'll be the one wearing a pink mink.
yesyesyes
... and I'll be cunningly disguised as a bricklayer's mate.
The enlightened being is [IN]
[Btd] Well, I found it worth while, though it would really be up to whoever knows me to judge the effect, if any. [Chalky] Do you remember what group it was? There are a lot of these things (perhaps less so now than ten or twenty years ago), and yards of self-help books in all the bookshops. I expect that Sturgeon's Law applies. I'll write more when I have time this evening.
Pilgy Pilgy
Probably won't be along this evening since I've a lot on at work today, what with the three day week and all.
Uselessness
Apologies for uselessness but what's the "usual" time? 8ish?
Excuses . . . .
Alas, I'll be working out in the gym. Then I'm chasing mice and putting doors up.
chasing through rooms
[Boolbar] If you put the doors up first, you can then shut them and therefore won't have so far to chase the mice. Also (if the mice co-operate) can the chase not be part of your workout? Could you persuade them to run at half-pace for the first ten minutes, then full-pelt for 15 minutes, then a cool down pace for the final ten? It would seem to be the organised thing to do.
Lost Consonants
[Kim] Surely that should be "his tie is personal"
M/R/S INKSPOT - HELP
A rather red faced Dujon appears before his accusers; "It wasn't me, Guv" He says. "The blasted Windows machine suddenly started opening windows everywhere and in my desperation to stop such infidelity I clicked all over the bloomin' place." He added, "Then I found I was no longer a member of the celebrated..." *sobs* "Mornington Crescent League on the Internet."
"Can you please put me back in there?"
"Sorry!"
Member No.: 3256726, Reg. Name: DUJON2774
Back in
Look what you have done! zipped in at No2.
The last time I looked I was the father of wonderful three boys ;)
Patch the dog
Last nights ball-gown cyberpilg was very amusing. By an incredible coincidence, this was in my mailbox this morning...

Its New, Its Safe!
Its The Most Advanced Penile Enlargement Solution! !
It's 100% Guaranteed To Enlarge Your Penis. 3+ INCHES!
MAGNA-RX PATCH! Etc etc

So now I know…

PS. I was under the impression that someone was transcribing events – or at least cutting and pasting. Is this correct, and if so, can I have a copy?
Transcript
I've got a bit of it, but I think DrQ's got the whole lot waiting for him on his machine at work. I guess it'll put in an appearance sometime this afternoon.
Weapons of Mice Destruction
[pen] Now why didn't I think of that . . . I used chemical warfare on the mice. Peppermint oil down the gaps in the floorboards that they want to get through. Didn't get as far as hanging the door.
As I was leaving the gym a young slim female was looking my way so I tossed my towel nonchalantly over my shoulder, only for the towel to land slap over my head. I guess it's a good job I'm already married.
throwing in the towel
[Boolbar] But you would have made her laugh - and that, probably above all, is what women like. Speaking personally, making me laugh would go a long way to making a man attractive to me. Our mate Phil the Landlord (who was working on a business proposal at the time) kindly help me draft a marriage proposal in the chatroom last night, but unfortunately it expired before I could use it. :o(
Laughter
Women like MONEY and IDIOTS.
an unvarnished truth
[st d] Yes, because both make them LAUGH. QED.
Dr Q has posted the link to the transcript of last night's cyberpilg in Orange 'Pilg game' - it's taken me a whole HOUR to speed-read it.
Yes. By the way, is Buttercup a regular visitor to the Crescent? I've been looking around for him/her.
Buttercup
Someone mentioned last night, when asked the same question, that 'Buttercup' is the person known as pl ... the pl person was around last week and is very funny.
Yes, I'd picked up on that... so presumably this is a 'chat-only' guise. Well the more the merrier, certainly! And it was pretty merry last night I thought. Toga party next week?
chat-a-tat
Aww! I'm sorry I missed that.. I have a blokie coming to look at my home computer tomorrow and hopefully he'll sort it out. It's acting very strange and will only boot in safe mode now. I can't work out what's wrong with it. Very annoying!
Diagnosis
[snorgle] I think the problem is that it's broken.
[Chalky] Before my intention to say some more vanishes off the top... The course I was on does come from the States originally, founded by two Anglican priests (although there's nothing specifically religious involved) something like 25 years ago. Difficult to say much concrete, really. It's mainly about learning to see things as they are, and noticing when we stop doing that. Just look at a lot of the postings in the Advice game at MCiOS for examples of the stuff people come out with when that happens. They're posted there in fun, of course, but how often do you hear people saying things like that in real life?
beta-talk
I had not been in a chat room before last night and enjoyed it greatly. Although I did not contribute very much(sorry), I'll try and do better next time, but my typing speed is tortoise slow.
paws are not so good to type with...
Inkspot] Thank heavens someone else is in the same boat! I nearly fell over in awe at the laser-wit demonstrated by some contributors - very notably Néa and Pen. Great evening – especially following on from the classic ISIHAC earlier.
Apologies for not being able to make it last night. The internet was broken. Or at least the bit of it that leads to my house was. However, an internet-fixer came by today, and so I have home connection again. See you all next week, maybe.
Mr Inkspot!
Thank you kind sir.
Aunty's slow
'Tis ok.
Is it just me at the moment, as I'm getting error messages and pages just not loading when looking round BBCi news.
I was barely there Monday night after the initial flurry of activity - the phone line and/or/therefore the internet decided to die, slowly and horribly. Am not going to be around the next two, probably three weeks. A pity.

and Dujon: please check your email, see if mine got through to you, and let us know what you think... Thanks.

flerdle
Your message has been responded.
Typos notwithstanding
[BtD] I'm flattered - and encouraged that my distinctive typo style didn't detract from your enjoyment :o). Mostly it comes from snorting with laughter so hard that I can't see to type.
keyboard madness
[Dunx] I managed to access the internet last night, but then the keyboard doesn't seem to be working. Then it started beeping and random numbers appeared. I'm sure it must be a virus, as I can't think why my keyboard would suddenly go mad..

Also, when I switched my computer off, it seemed to switch off, but I realised later that the screen was off but the power was still on in the base unit..

[snorgle] I think your computer needs a good defenestration.
[snorgle] Or some good, old-fashioned percussive maintenance.
quick fix
BB/Wol] You are both wrong. I would rather suggest hitting it with a hammer or throwing it out of the window. Far more effective.
fencing
[Boolbar]That sounds rude! [Wol]Tried it already. [st dogmael]Sorely tempted..
a window on the world
Ooh, I love a good defenestration first thing in the morning...
Seriously ...
[snorgle] sounds like it could be a virus (My father-in-law had - I think - Bugbear, which stopped him from turning his machine off. Of course, he could just have unplugged it ... It also seemed to disable Norton anti-virus, but AVG found it in the end.) grisoft.com have a good, free anti-virus (AVG), and also utilities for extracting individual viruses once they have been identified.
*Wandering through dragging a teddy bear and sleeping bag*
I'm off to have my second nap of the day. Ooh! Aren't I lazy?!?!
awooga!
[Wol]The faults make it difficult to get to websites and do things.. Hopefully, the blokie tonight will sort it out.. [Lib]Yes you are! Wake up now!
[Raak] Thanks for that. Your experience sounds altogether less pushy, for want of a better word, than mine. Yes, it was about 18 years ago and to be truthful, I've been raaking my brains trying to remember the name of the organisation - I've even looked for the notes I made at the time. I recall that the lady who did most of the front work was called Ross. As well as being highly articulate, she was also extremely funny, which may be why my abiding memory is that of an immensely enjoyable experience. Your interesting observation regarding the Advice Game in MCiOS has prompted me to revisit, reread and revise my interpretations of some entries. Fascinating :-)
Training
I used to have great fun watching training videos for a well-known electrical company borrowed from a friend who worked for them. Themes included "How to recognise a customer" and "What do customers need?” My own experience of corporate indoctrination was when I worked for a record company and was sent on an induction day. It was a disaster. We had to offer our perceptions about customer responses to their TV ads. I told them the truth, that the ads were patronising and superficial. I lasted two weeks.
Can there be any better time to say the word "pendulum"?
hanging time...
[Thos] I don't think so. It shut us all up for five hours!
Disappointing news :o( My first new staff member was supposed to be starting on Monday but she's accepted another job instead. Poo. The next one starts on 15th December though...
Today I read a sign in the hosptial foyer.

"Due to difficulties we are unable to serve hot food in the resturant tonight. Please bare with us".

Not entirely sure how taking our clothes off will help, but willing to try!

Dr in Undressed Salad Scandal!
Uh...no comment. :)
Celebdaq
[Inkspot] I'm confused. After kneecapping on Monday, I used my ten grand to buy shares in J Wilkinson. I don't appear to have received any dividends at all. Does one have to stay with the same celeb for a full 7 days to qualify? Also - where to we find the 'Dividend Payout' List for today?
Just a final word about that course...I've actually done several of their courses over the last 10 years or so, as well as being on the organising team a few times. It's called "The Life Training", and in London it's put on every two months.
Johnny who?
Chalky] I am suprised that you have no divis as the payout is proportional to how long its been held, if a dividend is £7, and you hold that celeb from Tuesday, you will get £3, the big winners will be those that had like evil_edna who had the shares for all seven days. You can request a daily update email from the daq towers which on Fridays gives your payout plus details on divi of the week. Otherwise it means waiting till Monday when the full list will be published.
ps the reason for my long tem minus weekly gain is I have a cunning plan!
*cackle*
Jonny Wilkinson is my pretty boy! And I made it to No. 81 in the national table :o)
feeling a bit short-changed
[evil cackling woman] Perhaps there wasn't enough of him to go round - everyone wants a slice of him now :-(
Anything interesting happening in MCiOS or Orange? My ISP isn't allowing me into either server - very annoying, especially as I'm having a quiet day at home and I've got time to play .... *sound of gnashing teeth*
Hmmm
I made the mistake of getting some Michael Jackson as well. Never mind. Well done miss evil :)
daqy
I got Michael Jackson as well.. better than nothing, I suppose.. it's probably not work going for Johnny next week now. At least my computer's working again! It was the keyboard, so one new keyboard later, and everything's fine.
ISPants
[Chalky] Hmm, I can't get into outer space either...
Nnnnoooo...no pars-s-s-slow....
No chat...GAAAH!
dubious parentage
Now look here all you ex Pants chaps, it's just not cricket, shutting up the clubhouse like that when a fella's off writing a novel and not leaving a forwarding address! It was a good job a small trail of crumbs was left at the profiles page and a friend of mine called Lycos knew where you'd all gone. Consider yourself heartily rebuke, nay, castigated.
Novel post
Welcome Mr Coyote, yet another Pants refugee. I believe we are distant cousins?
Wile E Smiley!
*popping in to flash a grin at Wile E*. Am watching Channel 4's 100 Best Sexiest Scenes from the Movies and it's really rather good.....
Channel Phoar
*Curses the day he through the TV out*
Super Genius!
Welcome to our new home, WEC! And how is Marie these days?
Hello again!
[WEC] Sorry to find out that various messages were not passed on - it's so hard to find decent help these days! ... :-) Anyway, you have found a few of us; did you employ Sherlock?
[DrQ] I'm more worried about Jeeves, to be quite honest, after all he's the one who serves the drinks. Marie simply, well, err, serves otherwise.
The lovely Marie
Ah, it's heart warming to be greeted by friends both new and old alike. [Bob] Would you be the Bob of the Kensington 'the Dogs' who was splashed all over the society pages last year? [DrQ and Duj] I found Marie stood on the steps of the old Clubhouse scraping a living selling sacks (at least I thought that's what she said) and she must have been down on her luck poor girl because it seemed she had hardly a stitch to wear! I did indeed send her to procure the services of the great Mr Holmes but the last I heard he had employed a new housekeeper and had retired to bed. I fear he may be ill because that was two weeks ago and not a sound has been heard from him or Marie since! No news of Jeeves, I assumed he had been packed up with the other chattels of the club when everyone moved. I'll keep my ear to the ground.
carpet bugger
wec] 'Fraid not. No I'm one of the Bromsgrove chapter. However, I did make a splash in the society pages. As a result, I had to spend the rest of the day outside.
monopoly
Every time I look down the Home page I feel like an evil taking-over-type person! Just clarifying here that I don't do it on purpose...
jeeves update
[Anyone even remotely interested] Popped round the old place looking for any clue of Jeeves' whereabouts and heard an odd scratching sound. Turned out the old chap was asleep in the billiard room when you all locked up and he's been surviving on the contents of the belowstairs larder and discarded podumes ever since. He had planned to dig a tunnel to escape and the plan was well, advanced, he had just unupholstered a couple of the old wing chairs from the servant's lounge to make the top of the vaulting horse that he had fashioned from the Dom Perignon crates in the member's cellar when I broke in and tok him home. He was beside himself with glee and ached for news off 'his gentlemen' and I tol him that I had tracked some of them down at a swanky new club. He seemed utterly delighted and asked to come down in order to seek employment and to meet you all agan but I put him to work immediately, buffing up my favourite 'Crescent Jacket' and digging out my Lumpton Jr texts from the library so that I may fully immerse myself in play once more. It's for his own good. See you soon, must fly, he's preparing a sumptuous dish of Bernard's Turkey Drummers and Alphabites and I don't want to miss that.
Termination of Face Pyjamas
May I suggest a game of "Christmas Cards you wish you'd never received"?
Goodnight
[gil] Hmmm... sounds interesting. Perhaps one could also pastiche those "newsy" letters that people insist on sending round this time of year.
stupid pewter
Agh! My computer has flipped out again! It refuses to even start up now - I must complain to computer blokie as I think it was something he did.. (v. stressful, this..)
Pastiche and chips
Newgame] How would Christmas cards work? Like postcards from Hell? That never seemed to take off.
Round robin game? Yes! Finish off previous sentence, start next sort of thing?
This year Mary and I decided to
Takeoff
[Bob] Really?
Bob the dog sentence
murder our parents, who had long been
Erm, no then.
All] Same time same place tonight?
Rab] Ah! I've not seen that one, it looks better than the last one on !York.
snorgle] blackmailing us with photographs they took of us on holiday when we were three. Fortunatly for my parents they had
silly sentence
[Btd}...thought of this, and had boobytrapped their...
sn] catflap with gelignite. I was most suprised, a little singed and completely failed to
..effect a surreptious entrance. Seconds after the blast..
Aside
(sounds like a player - shall we get it going?)

...Mother responding by getting...

Tear in the space-time contiuum thingy!
Reverse the polarity! Divert all power to deflector! Issue 'date 1201190703.34' as root! Hopefully dialling the server's clock back an hour won't break MC5 too much...
Another vote for the Bob-the-dog sentence spectacular.
...out her feather duster...
Or of course we could always do Good News / Bad News.
Too late! The deed is done
Tuj] coming to the Online cyber-pilg tonight on the MCiOS chat server? The dress code is Cowboys 'n' Injuns.
New Game
OK. It kinda worx.
New Game
[gil] It seems to have turned rather quickly into Random Prose, though.
*** game
I was grateful to be reminded, at about 6.50pm or so yesterday, of the fantastic potential of Censored Songbook (from the King and I - 'shall we *****, shall we *****, shall we *****?'). Any takers? Possibly only subtly different from the Pants Game but, for me, right at the other end of the comedy spectrum (ie funny).
****
[Wol] Yes indeed. I second that one.
I **** it.
Item of cutlery in a hot place.
I guess we could all give it a ***.
Is it just me or is a huge chunk of the 'net unavailable today?
nonet
[Wol] I think it's ******
Did you have a good time in the chatserver last night? I spared you a thought but was too busy chasing after a puppy with paper towels and wetwipes.
I so hate Geocities!
***** game
[Wol] Is that a vote for ****ing the pants game?
Tried to access the chatserver last night but ***** internet connection in my residence won't let me. Hope a good time was had by all.
*Warning, self promotion moment approaching* I was on national radio this morning! (Well, me and about 100 of my friends). Singing a Christmas Carol (recorded in June) from our CD. Rather exciting!
*****
[rab] Why yes, I believe it is. [Boolbar] I **** cute little puppies. [Lib] Oooh - which choir? Which radio station? Which carol? I've dropped out of the singing world a bit (job, studies, baby, etc) but I remember the thrills.
sick puppy
That is a very pretty puppy. I would like to ****** it.
it is ****
I did it. I ****** the pants game. :o)
i bet you do
pen] I've heard that you like ******** as well.
So was it an early night in the Chat Server last night? I say that, because I breezed in at 11.45 dressed as The Gal Who Cain't Say No to be greeted by a party of two. Thankfully, they had mildly silly names, so i didn't feel like a complete twonk. There are times when it would be useful to have a 'peep through the window' facility :-)
chat windows...
[Chalky] We don't encourage voyeurs! You are always welcome to come in as you are, we don't mind if you're inappropriately dressed (we always have spare costumes in the cupboard anyhow.) I was calamity pen, by the way, and Ma Whisky (I think Projoy recognised me as his mother), and also the Dusty Missionary. Ooh - and Zak from the Pony Express and Will Bill Hiccup. I was not, nor ever have been, the Spittoon or the Daddy of All Spittoons. And I'm sorry I sat and wriggled on Breadslinger's knee, I was in character and I got a little carried away.
Down with ****s
[Chalky] Yeah - we were being tired, methinks. Peeping through the window would be handy - but would anyone ever enter?

So the *** game - is it entire songs, just titles or indeed non-song specific?

[pen] I was one of the spittoons and the daddy, but not concurrently.

Massive Missive Musses Trellis
[gil, Raak] With the missive, I wonder whether it would be best to push this one to the end of the year, and perhaps set down some sort of 'theme' or similar for the next?
******* Whiskey and Wild Wild Women
[pen, rab] Sounds more fun than a stuttering dress rehearsal. Three of the principals have lost their voices and it's the First Night tonight. Ho hum.
Fer Gawd's Sake someone start the new game before some bozo drops by and claims it for a round of Spit the Pontoon.
[Chalky] Be my guest.
first night breakages
Break A Leg tonight, Chalks! I had great fun in the wild west saloon, and the theme was all down to your mention of Oaklahoma, so thanks for that. I'm womdering what the venue for next week's meeting will be... the Sports Centre? A restaurant? A Country House Hotel?
small squeak
... not quite brave enough to start a new game ...

Thanks pen :-)

*CLANG!*
I was the original spittoon. How they teased me at school.
Pro Joy
Projoy] You made me so much last night I'll be sending you the laundry bill.
I think I was all the misspelt 'spitoons'...

[*** game] I would start this, but I need clarification on whether it's strictly a songbook (i.e. song titles), songs themselves (as I believe is the case on ISIHAC) or a more general game.

Missive T
Rab] You are right about MT game - it'd be better in bite sized portions. I wondered about a Jekyll and Hyde theme where player alternate personas. Bit like Goodnewsbadnews in letter format...?
Executive decision
Right - it's verses of songs (for now) but feel free to do poetry, short stories, or whatever else tickles your ****.
**** advice
I tried to start one of these **** games back at !York, but my poor attempt at explaining it (and its lack of having appeared on a then-recent ISIHAC) caused it to mutate and ultimately perish. Use it wisely, citizens of MC5.
[Wol] Hallé Orchestra and Choir, Christmas CD, on Classic FM at 7.50 this morning.
Missy Penny-lope, any time y'all wanna wriggle on ma knee, y'all go right ahead. Just watch out for ma spurs. Hhhhhhwaaaa-ding!
knee-sittin'
[Breadslinger] Did you have your cotton-pickin' eyes shut? It weren't no Miss Penny-lope a-sittin' on yer knee, it was mah own beeeootiful self!
blackballing Ma Whisky
Can we do something about that woman? She keeps following me around!
Wasn't Brian Ma Whisky the chairman of the Conservative Party under John Major?
Eeeew! And I let him sit on my knee!
Hmmph!
[Breadmaster] Pffft!
*CLANG*
* rolls slowly across the plain *
Ewired
I've just got me an evoke digital radio. Oooooooooh its soooooo good!
digirad...
Oooooh! Lucky you! I might treat myself to one for the kitchen after Christmas. Then I can listen to it while I'm surfing at home :o)
evocative
[Btd]I've had my eye on one of those..staticy radios are so-o-o-o-o annoying..
rad-ing the kitchen
[Btd, pen, snorgs] I'm still waiting for them to go down in price.
[pen] Sounds as though your PC is in your kitchen. Not so unusual really. I have a kitchen-cum-diner-cum-office, which rather places me in the centre of ground floor activity; fine if I'm home alone. It does lend itself to easy raiding of fridge, though.
gone digin'
This one was on special offer - I think because it is a 'classic fm' model and has a button to get you straight to there. I do not like classic fm very much so that button will (mostly) remain unused. Its the other channels I'm enjoying - BBC radios 6 and 7 are top of my list at the moment. 6 'cos it has interesting music and 7 because of the archived comedies including ISIHAC. And it has a pretty blue screen too.
writing in stereo
I bought a new stereo in september. When I was looking around I wanted a CD player, tape and digital radio combo, preferably in a mini hi-fi system with good speakers. However such a device is not made 9which seems a bit daft to me). Grrrr. So I just bought the stereo and will wait for a digi-radio to get cheaper. My bro has one though, so I might pinch it when he's not looking (in the evil-little sister way of doing things!).
cheapskate, me? The 7th Earl of Lancaster?
[Btd]The one I saw at Boots was £99, so how much is the Classic FM model? Is that the one at WH Smiths?
Yup - reduced to £71.
That was me by the way.
Personally I'd want a hi-fi separate digiradio, cos although these retro-style portables are all well and good I don't understand why you would want a high-quality, distortion-free digital signal piped through a three-inch speaker.
rab] This one has line out on the back (I checked before buying) - so I can (and will) use it with my seperates. And the speaker isn't bad at all!
random question
What countries are we all from on this place? I sometimes detect language/ideas from the other side of the pond, and I find it all very interesting.
countries
USA. Although I try to use the British spelling when I think about it.
Why, I'm in London. Where are you, ZK?
UK - Statford-upon-Avon.
[Bm] Kicking about a messy student flat in Birmingham :)
Kicking a dog about in a messy house in Bucks!
UK also..Birmingham also..Sutton Coldfield exactly
Oh, Angus...
[AP] (ignoring the obvious rspca-needing overtones) You just told me it wasn't that bad! :)
Kicking about in a small, scruffy semi in Herts. [Angus - where are you in Bucks? I'm just 500 yards from the county line, sheriff]
[Chalky] It's a laptop on the kitchen table. Very handy for grilling sausages while I surf, although there's never anything interesting left in my fridge. Sometimes I take the laptop upstairs to watch DVDs in bed :o)
Multi-tasking
[Pen] Does that mean that it is used as an electric frying pan cum hot water bottle? How often do you need to wash the bedding?
[Dujon] It only really needs doing if I fry fish.
Luxury
When I was small, I read a book in which a character declared that mangos should always be eaten in the bath, because of the mess. For years, eating mangos in the bath has been my idea of utter decadent pleasure. But I have since revised this to watching DVDs in bed on a laptop, which I now do frequently and with enormous satisfaction.
Eeek!
[Pen] *Urrgh!* ... ;-) [Pen & Breadmaster] Without mentioning names, there are some who frequent this web site who worry me!
Hang on, officer
Not those kinds of DVDs. Dear me...
thereabouts
I'm in Cardiff - which has finally got rather cold..
Pretty chilly in Mancatraz this morning too.

Got a delightful letter from my Grandma this weekend. My favourite comment was "The things that go on in the Villages. I could write a book about it, but they'd have to bin it.". I presume she meant that it would have to be binned because of the scandalous content, but with that combined with her rather free-form jazz writing style, there could be a Booker Prize in her...

Narrrch here, in the flatlands north east of London. Cold and sunny today.
CD DVDs?
[Dujon] Lord no, not those kinds of DVDs! The ones I can remember watching in bed are the Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon...and it's generally when I get 'flu, which isn't very often at all.
The NW London 'burbs are very bright and sunny. At 11.30GMT, my car is still thoroughly frosted over.
Icy here. The water inside the chicken coop froze last night. Poor chooks.
Is there a dress code for tonight? May I suggest Inuit?
[Bob] Bring your own igloo party? As long we can speak in English this week...
Cold?
It's -10 C here in balmy Pittsburgh, after Friday's 8-10 inches of thick, wet snow. Woo-hoo!
brr..
As my damn 'puters still doolally, I probably won't be there again.. :( I'll take a hammer to it tonight and try to threaten into submission, we'll see how that goes!
Geographically speaking...
Currently lurking in the Essex suburbs, to answer the earlier enquiry...
Location, Location, Location
[ZK] Portland, Oregon USA now, but formerly of various parts of the UK, and originally growing up in the fine Surrey outpost of Ilkley, W. Yorks.
random things one knows
Alan Titchmarsh grew up in Ilkley. Fact. Is Oregon east or west?
Orientation
[ZK] Of what?
[Location] Currently, just in Bucks (by about 300 yards from Beds) Very close to the Herts border, too - in fact, I drive through all 3 counties to get to work.
[Watty] Well that's a coincidence. I was born in Chorleywood, which happens to be on the Herts/Bucks border: I was born on the Herts side, by a couple of hundred yards. (A road actually runs along the border, and is appropriately called "Shire Lane" - the odd-numbered houses are Herts, the even numbers are Bucks. Or it may be the other way around.) Not so near to Berks or Beds, though.

Whereas, having gone to school in darkest mid-Somerset, now I live in Manchester...

The Titchy One
[ZK] Indeed he did - he's a patron of the theatre where I did some acting when I was growing up, and where my sisters still do.

Oregon is west coast. It's the state between California and Washington (Washington state being a completely different place from Washington DC, of course).

more interuptions
This has taken a bit longer than needed and its still not right I'm not happy about the table layout, the colours, border but finally, with my apologies for the late arrival, Dec 5 and Chalky has topped the Celebrity MC League.

At least I know slightly more than I did two weeks ago about style sheets, attributes, values and syntax, but I still need to do boxes and margins.

Oooh... nice!
[Inkspot] Nice table. I'm hanging onto Jonny Wilkinson for now ;o) even though he's gone down in value. Hoping that there'll be more about him in the papers after today's victory parade.
top chocolate
Well done Inkspot. I'm growing rather fond of my four green Mars Bars :-)
Cresdaq
How did everyone join that?
Joining Fees
[ZK] If you are interested in silly games, join up on the BBC web site, get sorted with registration and, if you ask nicely and advise your player name and number, Inkspot just might add you to the 'team'.
Where?
Sorry - it would help if I gave you an address:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/cgi-perl/celebdaq/trade.cgi?registershow=1

Celebdaq tables
[Inkspot] Unless you are deriving some pleasure out of composing your own table, why not use a screen capture program? I hope that I am not being rude, as I do appreciate your time and trouble spent on this 'game'.
If you are interested, there is a freeware programme available at This site
An example of its output can be seen here.
That, by the way, is my one and only attempt so I'm sure it could be improved.
Hmmm
Then again, it's a bit big. I'll take that back. ... :-(
speak up!
Is anyone going to say anything today?
[pen] Still in shock from last night...
[rab] I should imagine you're exhausted . .
?
So will anyone admit what went on? It's very mysterious...
mystery
[snorgle] rab rode a bicycle around the chatroom (which relocated to an igloo last night) for about two hours. Nothing remarkable about that, you might think, until you realise the saddle was made of ice. I think he might also be suffering from being in the company of Lib in a mackerel-skin basque, Chalky in Lycra and me in a seal-skin bikini. That's a lot to take in. ;o)
We also had a visitation from a nude Jade Goody. Least said, soonest mended.
oooh rab - your SO SWEEEEET!!!! I fort youd say summink NHAAHAHAHHH!
Am I dreaming?
That was NOT me... I know I'm responsible for a lot of weird stuff in the chatroom on a Monday night, but I wouldn't dream of inviting Jade Goody on here... honest. Naaahahahahhahh!
This places Chalky firmly in the frame...
What's happened to Mr Wildpants' Mornington Crescent site? I've lost Puckoon to the ether...
A Death in the Family
[Mr T] Sadly, Pants MC went the way of all flesh a couple of months ago. The Lock Cup has been transferred to the new Lockisseum site, but players of other games have been finding a warm welcome here and at the other MC sites which remain.
Igloo pilg
Damn - had to miss it because of deadlines and computer problems. It sounds like it was a classic. Will the transcripts go up on Orange?
And welcome Mr T. All you need is here.
oooh missus
[Bob] I'm afraid the link to the transcript is already there. *blushes*
Hello Mr Trebus :-)
exciting happenins
My computer is being mended again - but I'm getting a new one for xmas, a nice shiny new computer with dvd re-writer and flashing lights(maybe)! Yay!
Speaking of the late Pants MC....
Does anyone know if Rosie is posting anywhere these days, following his little flounce-out of here a little while back?
Hello Bigsmith
Dujon may know a little more. Yes, a petulant flounce is certainly what it was. Seems we weren't quite good enough for him :-)
Yeah.
Does anyone know what all that was about? I'm all for constructive criticism, but I thought his exit comment was rather uncalled for.
[rab] I was rather hoping it was a misdirected moment of madness in the wee small hours after one pint too many, so was waiting for some form of apology or even explanation. I agree that the comment was crass and puerile; as for what lay behind it, one can only surmise that, as a mature adult, Rosie had his reasons. A dignified exit would have, at least, demonstrated a modicum of respect for you, the host.
rab] I thought some arsehole had posted using his name.
[Bob] Me too, which is why I didn't think too much of it at the time.
Time out on rugby ball
Oh sh*t. You know I was chatting about my fabbo date planned for tonight with the rugby coach? Well it's off. His grandfather 'died this morning'. It's either a big lie to get rid of me, or his grandfather did it deliberately to f*ck up any chance I had of graduating out of my enforced spinsterhood. Either way, I'm taking it personally. *reaches out blindly for proffered hankie from sympathetic MC-fivers*
a clean handkerchief
[pen] Aw! And I was just about to post a 'break a leg/wing bone/bottle of bubbly' sort of message to you because I'd remembered that tonight was supposed to be the night. Intending no disrespect to his grandfather who may/may not have passed on today/recently/ages ago, it's probably for the best. You know what they say about men who talk about themselves all the time ....
and a box of choccys.
pen] Either he has no imagination or he is telling the truth. Either way you win!
*sniff*
Thanks you two. I'm going to spend the evening in a Bridget Jones way, wrapping Christmas presents to within an inch of their lives and painting my toenails.
Reason I asked
I too thought Rosie's last entry totally out of character and probably bogus. However time has passed with no further sightings, and I was curious that's all. Miss the old buffer truth be told.
Penelope's night in
Watching DVDs in bed seems a popular choice for a night in these days. I have a quiet night in for once myself tonight which I shall spend with my nose in a book - wading through George MacDonald Fraser's Flashman papers for the umpteenth time. Fantastic stuff.
pondering
Rosie was great! It isn't that bad here, so maybe it was the loss of a particular game that upset him?
It isn't bad at all
It seems that he is missed. I hope he gets to know.
Colin Firth around the corner
[Penelope] It seems to me that this chap can't have been of good genetic stock, given his grandfather's propensity to die at socially inconvenient moments. A night in with your toenails sounds far more enjoyable. If it's any consolation, I have to spend tonight in with the Venerable Bede, who is not the best company.
mine's the one with the faux fur around the neck..
[BM]The dead rarely are. They often smell, for a start.
feeling sorry all round
[pen] I think the word 'arse' sums up things. Hope the DVDs hit the spot. [all] I'm feeling very sorry for myself today. Hangover. Seemed a good idea at the time. Hows everyone else today?
[pen] Tsk. [lib] A little tipsy, after preparing for a 2pm meeting with a couple of pints during lunch, and looking forward to seeing Johnny Vegas in Liverpool this evening. I hope to be hungover tomorrow, saturday and/or sunday, though, at which juncture I shall feel your pain.
Feelings
[Lib] Very well, thank you, although I can't figure out why I'm so tired today. I fear I may be battling a bug of some kind, my wife having had a sore throat for a few days now. With any luck a nice vigorous run this morning will shake the various bits of phlegm loose.
[pen] *hug* Sorry about that, chuck.
All hugs welcomed but....
[Dunx] Thanks.. but maybe you should just keep your distance until you get over your bug! (I've already kept off one lurgy from my Kiwi flatmate this week). BTW, a rib-splitting belly-laughing session has just done wonders for shifting the phlegm from my tubes this afternoon. My colleague has discovered my weakness for anyone doing impressions of Jim Royle's 'ha-HA' laugh and now my ribs ache. :o)
Santa Ted
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, he's back!
And this time it's not even accidental. Must remember to take him down at the end of the festive period.
Poo, lots of it.
Hmmm, I wonder who chewed that hole in the carpet.....
If that's a reference to Christmas Ted, then I would suggest your browser is to blame.
missing persons
[Boolbar] Ah - so Poo Puppy is responsible for keeping you away from the Crescent?
relief road
phew - the traffic has started moving again in the Limerick game..
One down, three to go
The first of my attempts to avoid the prospect of unemployment next year has been put into action. Won't hear the outcome til May though...
[Chalky] Is that a reference to Boolbar's poo post?!
[Darren] oh dear, yes - the juxtapositioning is rather questionable :-)
Be vewy vewy quiet....
[rab] Is it grant season already?
[DrQ] Oh yes indeedy.
Academia
How does that work? Does lack of grant mean loss of tenure, or does lack of grant mean that work to gain tenure cannot be undertaken (unless independently funded)? Sorry if the question seems imbecilic but I have no knowledge of how it all dovetails.
Foo!
I dunno how it goes on the Eastside of the Atlantic, but over here profs apply for only-God-and-her-secretary-knows-how-many grants, out of which they pay their postdocs/grad students/other staff, as well as equipment costs, and *cough*40% university overhead. Around here, if you want to get a tenure-track professorship, you pretty much need to have grants in tow.
[DrQ] That's pretty much what happens over here as well. Except that we don't have tenure any more, so even when you have a job, you still have to run as fast as you can to keep it. Especially if you're in a 4-desperate-to-be-a-5 rated department.
hang on
Rosie's back!
The house at poo corner
[Chalky] Indeed. The puppy (Frodo) is delightful but he also needs a lot of attention. Plus the ongoing mouse in the roof situation and the leeking outside loo means I shouldn't be here now.
cupboard love
[Boolbar] Where are you? Hiding in the cupboard under the stairs until those problems are sorted out by someone else?
(again)
I'd just like to say that I've found the perfect combination of undergarments for inclement weather whilst walking and exhibition-visiting in town. A long-sleeved thermal vest plus a long sleeved shirt will keep you warm but not bulk you out. Can I also recommend the '100 Years of the Art Fund' exhibition at the Hayward Gallery.? Bloody excellent. And now I'm going to bed for some well-earned sleep. See you all Monday night in the chatroom when I will tell you how my new member of staff got on during his first day with me as his boss! :o)
(and no, I'm not pissed, but I hope to be tomorrow)
A weekend away and I return to find that penelope's well insulated for the weather and likely to be pissed by now (11.50GMT), Frodo puppy is as demanding as he is appealing and it's grant season in academia - so the only contribution I can make is, yes I had a wicked time and can we do something Christmassy tomorrow night, like Santa's Toy Factory in Lapland, or something like ....?
Lapland and frigidity
It's 'funny' at this time of year to read the various comments about the cold weather. ... :-)
I'm sitting here in my workshop in a light short-sleeved top with a coolish - for this time of year - day outside. It's about 23°C at the moment (11:57Z) and one of flerdle's eight legged friends is sitting on the Holland blind a couple of feet away from me. Sorry, I don't have a digital camera otherwise I'd take a pic for you. He's a Huntsman, which generally have a much larger body size than the Wolf Spider which flerdle displayed a while ago. No doubt he's having a nap, being daytime, and only occasionally moves his legs around.
Should I get the chance tomorrow morning I shall attempt to join you in the chat room of MCiOS, but having work to do it may not be possible.
toasty
I'm just back from Melbourne, Sydney and Cairns (well, Atherton Tablelands, actually) where it was occasionally stormy but nice, beautiful, and stinking hot respectively. It is rather warm here but not too bad, all things considered.

Having missed it for the last couple of weeks, I'm afraid I probably won't make it to the MCiOS chatroom this Monday night either as I have to fly to Newcastle (near Sydney) for work. Plus I'm just knackered. *groans*

mints
I'll try to make it..my computer is sort of working, and I should manage it. Is 8pm too early?
pilght
I'd love to pilg tonight as I had so much fun prancing around in my mackerel skin bikini last week, but I've got a problem. Can anyone help? What it is, is there's a big content filter here (where I live and work and have my only net connection), so Shhhh, don't tell anyone I access (as I've not asked but am sure if I do then will be told its not allowed). Anyway. The chatroom doesn't work. The clock on MCiOS functions (so I think I have flash 6) and the chatroom page loads and tells me nicely to type my name 'here' and then press connect, but it refuses to connect. I've tried clicking on it many ways (including whilst doing a handstand, which quite frankly just looked silly!) but can't figure it out. Any bright ideas? Please?!?!
light
[Lib] You might be better off asking Dan at MCiOS since he's the one who understands how the chatroom works. My guess is that the communication between your computer and the chat server is done using a "port" (which is a bit like a particular telephone extension on a switchboard) that the hospital doesn't want you to have access to and there ain't much you can do about that.
blight
My work computer doesn't like the chatroom either - I'm not going to complain as I get to use the internet as much as I like, otherwise..
new game ideas
Now that the crossword chat has crept into the crypt ... I would love to play an Imposters game of some sort.
Impostulating
How about murder in the dark imposters. Correctly guess the identity of other players for points. And what do points mean..?
points mean
Piccalili?
Tonight
It looks like I may not make it to the chatroom tonight, on account of entertaining a visitor to our department. On the other hand, that may well not go on too late, so I might make a late entrance if I take my laptop with me.
re: Tonight
[rab] You mean someone *willingly* went to Manchester? *ducks* Then again, one could make the same claim for Pittsburgh and its 16" of snow the past two weeks....
Belatedly
PRIZES!! sorry
Impostors Crescent - the return?
Well, if anybody wants to play over on Mornington Crescent in Outer Space, you'll see that somebody has started an Impostors Game there - with a twist. The more players, the merrier, and let's see how it develops...
Oh goody ... how about Good News/Bad News ... here?
oops
It seems to have happened :-)
Impostors
How does this imposters crescent thing work?
Imposing
[ZK] You pretend to be someone else, and play the entire game in character as that person. (Hint: browse the archives!). You display your imposted moniker using a '!' sign in front. I'm afraid this is a geeky thing: '!' means 'not' in C and related computer languages. Oh, and the game's at MCiOS in case you were unaware.
Andanovverthing
Usually once the game has ended, the unmasking begins. I think I've worked one of them out already!
Groovy
Sounds like fun to me! However, must go and clean out fridge. Less fun but entirely necessary.
It's not that bad....
[Dr Q] You should visit Manchester, it's not half as bad as rab makes out. Maybe we should have a mini-plig here......
Mini-plig
Maybe when Nik comes out of his coma and JLE has finished his piano practice, this could be arranged...
I've been wondering about a Super Pilg. Format - our very own ISIHAC. MCers are warned of the games and prepare in advance. We'd probably have to stay up late so a hotel venue would be best. Any takers?
A nod to Bob
[Bob] Thought I'd best acknowledge your wonderings, particularly as they incorporate the words 'staying up late', 'hotel venue' and end in 'Any takers?' - not a question one would wish to leave hanging overnight :-)
Obviously the whole shebang would be recorded, or even filmed, and in the true tradition of the travelling ISIHAC which has torn itself away from its London roots, perhaps somewhere central to all participants, say ... the West Midlands?
Freelance MC
Sounds a fab idea - and if I were able to attend could offer my services as cameraperson and/or video editor, although I've not any decent sound recording equipment.
100
Should anyone fancy a go, I've posted a cryptic film quiz that has turned up in the office. There are gaps which stumped us.
[Inky] Is part of the test of the quiz to find it?!?! Or am I being daft? [BtD] A super-pilg would be fantastic. Let's do it!
Lights come on!
[Inky] I've Found it!
Did I forget something?
Oh yes I put it in 'Obscure vault 99 '
Coma? What coma? I'm fine. Honest (note: I'm not fine).
ISIHAC pilg
Ok seems like that ones a goer. Wishlist for venue:
Real Ales(?) or decent beer at least
Overnight accomodation for those wishing to stay
Not too expensive
Centrally based - Perhaps Oxfordshire?
Room to use as venue for parlour games - preferably with piano (is someone prepared to take the place of Colin Sell? Projoy?)
Any suggestions?
Organisational wishlist:
I'd love to help prepare the programme, but who will compare? rab?
Camerawork - blamelewis (excellent) And we'd need at least 8 regular players (and their spouces, friends, relatives, animals etc). + piano player...
As for timing, how does a weekend in May sound? We should have time to plan, hotels will be cheap, weather not too bad...
Did somebody say piano player?
Ooh
If I'm not tied down by those meddling exams I'd love to come along...if not, circulate tapes!
... and I would've gotten away with it too if it hadn't've been for you meddling exams!
Oh look, it's the only other human we've seen all episode
That was where I was going with it :)
Crescent celebdaq
Can I join?
Mr Piano
JLE are you a pianist? If so would you be interested in a diverting evening of entertainment playing parlour games?
Wild night
How does THIS look as a potential venue?
Comparison
Not sure I have the necessary wit, charm or smuttiness to be a viable compere.
[Bob] Well, I'd say I was a pianist, if no less than six qualifications of various different types from music colleges and still an inability to get a steady job means anything of the sort...
Noteworthy
JLE] Fantastic - and a willing participant?
rab] I beg to differ.
Spank
I'd need a script.
more players
ZK] Visit Celebdaq towers to create a player profile and buy some shares. Come back here and post your player ID No and I will add you straight away. For my sins I have two accounts in the league as does Uncle Korky. I'm still not sure how blamelewis has managed to grab the No1 shot at the moment but there will tears before bedtime after the divis are paid out on Friday!
[BtD] I see a plan forming. Thos might be willing to help work on a script of some sort (if we could cope with all those puns!). And the proposed venue is acceptable to me.
A Thos script would be superb. The St George is OK but only has 8 rooms (Mostly double and en-suite) cost £70 per room B&B. There are other B&Bs within walking distance of the pub. I've been ringing some contacts at the BBC and I may have secured a guest appearance by the one and only Samantha. I assume she would be available to tot-up the teams’ points.
Would love to do it, but depends very much on the cost.
celebdaq
am already registered, but haven't looked for aaaages...*goes to find number*...3058974.
oh_danny_boy
ZK] You are in and added to the league, I hope you will enjoy the friendly competition ;)
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
Fabbo! Thanks!
Returning from bbc.co.uk
Wahey! I already suck! This'll be fun!
ISIHA?
JLE] Thanks.
Lib] Can you ask Thos if he'd be able to do some scripting?
all] I think that £70 per room is probably too expensive. Plus the getting to the venue. If I could find somewhere for about £30 B&B, how many would like to participate? As I said, we'd need about 8 definites to make it worthwhile. So far:
Btd
Lib
ZK (as long as no exam conflict)
blamelewis (I assume yes)
JLE (As long as not too pricey)
maybe...
[BtD] I don't know where Thos hides, but Projoy does, so maybe if he's reading this he could ask him. Thanks Projoy. And I have to say that I'm really not that witty. Early in May would probably be better for me (as already have work, choir, hen night and wedding to schedule around!)
'I like driving in my car'
[JLE] I'll most likely be driving down to the super-pilg from Manchester(ish), so you could have a lift (to make it a bit easier on the pocket).
I would echo "not too priciness" comments.
[Lib] Lovely, as I'll be going from Manchester. The only trouble would be getting back afterwards, assuming the usual amount of Pilgrimage alcohol-consumption... unless you happen to be the one and only teetotal person in the world of MC. ;-)
Alcoholiday
JLE/Lib] If you can afford to B&B it, then you have at least one night to recover.
Seeing as rab is also from Manchester, is there room for further car sharing?
rabbiting
[BtD/rab] rab can have a lift too, provided we're still talking at that point! And if Nik, the other near-Manchester crescenter (that I know of) wanted to join our car-party then he'd be welcome too. We could have a very long game in the car to extend the pleasure! Whee! [JLE] I'd rather B&B it to facititate alcohol consumption, if it fits in with your buget.
Frolicing in May
I've just cross posted the idea onto Orange and MCiOS. Lets see what happens ...
seasons bleatings
May I just say, there are some truly revolting Christmas card illustrations out there? I just unearthed a pack of 50 hideous ones. OH well, they came out at 5c each...
Unconventional
[Lib, rab, Btd] This sounds more like a "convention" than a pilg. Although I suppose I should avoid that dread word, rendered frightening by SciFi fans. Thos hasn't been hanging around lately, so I've popped him an email. It sounds like the kind of thing I'd enjoy, tho, so put me down as a willing participant. If JLE's on the ivories, perhaps I could turn his pages or play the swannee.
If singing is required, I can also sing reasonably well in tune, but would need to be provided with *both* music *and* words, as I know remarkably little music that is less than a hundred years old.
(This is just in case we end up doing One Song To The Tune Of Another. My voice, by the way, is a fairly high tenor, as those who have met me in Pilgrimages can attest. I've sung lead tenor in a barbershop quartet before.)
Conventionality
How very flattering to be remembered! I would of course be delighted to contribute in any way thought useful - and though there are many, many funnier people round these 'ere parts, and several script writers amongst us, I would be exceedingly happy to provide/contribute to/collaborate on scripts. I would just need a brief and a spot of notice! *Thos bows*
seasons bleatings
[flerdle] Feel free! I have in fact been telling anyone who'll listen about this cultural epidemic I have lovingly termed "Ugly Jesus". This Christ bloke (apparently some kind of child star in his day) has made a startling comeback this year in cribs, nativity scenes, christmas cards and so on, about which of course I am thrilled, were it not for the fact that he tends to be portrayed as anything from rather gangly to positively misshapen, and every so often poor Mary makes it look genetic. Send me your sightings of Ugly Jesus - you'll notice it's true!
Interesting fact. Well, interestingish.
There was a tradition in ancient times that Jesus was ugly. I think that this came not from any genuine historical fact but from Isaiah 53, which the Christians believed was about Jesus, and which describes the "suffering servant" as not beautiful to look at.
There is also an apocryphal book called the Acts of Paul, which describes Paul as a short, bald hunchback with a single furry eyebrow like a big caterpillar. However, these were considered signs of beauty in ancient times, so they are probably not historical either - apart from the baldness.
in tune
[JLE] Personally, I think singing in tune is probably a disadvantage.
Re: in tune
[Projoy] Quite right -- Jeremy Hardy gets the biggest round of applause in 1S2TTOA....
Intonation
(Dr Q) That's because his singing is so magnificently awful. The worst thing would be just a little out of tune. Garden and Cryer are both really good singers, especially boozy Barry.
Singing
I can't remember who it was who did Mr Boombastic by Shaggy (I think it was Garden) but it was absolutely superb.
Hardy - a laughing matter
All] I am planning to have one song to the tune of another. Projoy & Thos - you are very welcome to contribute and play (email me - my details are on the Orange pilg board).
It looks as if it is going to be a lot of fun! I nearly gave Samantha the job of preparing the briefs, but have decided to handle them myself. This will be done by New Year. Dunx is helping out with parts of the script and I've also had offers from I Say Porter. This works out well because both are abroad and can't attend (although Dunx has suggested a live phone session - is this a technical possibility blamelewis?) LotUS and Herr Bratche are also keen to attend and help.

Does anyone have a supply of Swannee Whistles and Kazoos?
Musical Instruments
It shouldn't be too difficult to fashion a Swanee Whistle out of a bicycle pump and a descant recorder mouthpiece though the pump might need to be sacrificed. A Kazoo is a comb with a bit of thin paper stuck to it.
technicalities
You'll get plastic kazoos and quite possibly swanees in most tacky gift shops :) Phone sesh: I believe you can buy a mic to fit to a phone to amplify what the person on the other end is saying, but I'm really not all that confident with sound stuff - a lot depends on numbers and size of room - if it's fairly small scale then a phone with speakerphone and everyone else keeping quiet might do it, if it's pretty big then you're into PA's and so on - none of it impossible but it begins to need careful planning and cost money!
The critical info for me is really just the details of when and where... Date, location and cost of staying will determine if I can make it - I'll try my damndest! Assuming I can then I reckon we should find out what sort of size the place is and what sort of equipment the venue has, or can accomodate. In terms of video recording and sound:
Camera: Mine (miniDV camcorder) - and if we have 2 or 3 other attendees willing to lend theirs we could record fixed close ups of team a, team b and "humph" with the option of a fourth camera doing a wider angle and audience reaction shots, piano cutaways etc etc... The venues lighting will be a consideration especially as my camera is a consumer model and therefore not too good under anything other than bright lights
Sound: for that I reckon if we have Bob the Dog's 4 track and mics for team a, team b, "humph" and the piano.
My thinking is based on the assumption that it's primarily a live show for an audience, with two teams, a chairperson and a pianist. We want to perform it live and only use retakes if absolutely necessary. I'd be interested to hear from anyone who's attended a recording of ISIHAC about how the day ran in technical terms - if they recorded items out of sequence or with breaks in the recording... My email is blamelewis at yahoo dot co dot uk. In terms of operators for all that technology it could be done on a minimum of two (1 sound and 1 camera) but the more the merrier...
Singing in the pain
I belong to the Jeremy Hardy school of singing.
Exactly
Blame] I've been lucky enough to go to a recording and I suggest we follow exactly the same format. At a particular venue, two shows for two consecutive weeks are recorded. They are recorded with a break in the middle which acts as refreshment time. I suggest that we have a Humph and four players for the first half followed by a beer break then a different four players for the second half. If we get more interest, we could get a second Humph (It'd be nice to ring the changes and offer the seat to more than one person). I've already had enough MCers showing interest to guarantee at least nine attendees, and if we get more (and I think we will) - we either have a bigger audience or will have to plan for more games.
Technically the shows are recorded in one go. Obviously there are times when a line is muddled (Humph is king of this). He simply starts again and the fluff is edited.
For those who have never attended and do not wish to know some of the secrets, I will paste the rest of this message on the laser display board.The show is semi-improvised, players having prepared for questions but still happy to ad-lib. The laser display board is John Naysmith with a piece of cardboard and you never actually see Samantha.
live recs
On the occasions I've seen it recorded there are usually some drop-in retakes to do at the end as well, but we perhaps might not be quite as fussy as the Beeb.
musical instruments of the plastic variety
I'm pretty sure I can get a decent kazoo from the local music shop for about a quid, if that.
Uber-pilg
Colour me interested.
pilg
Can I ask that I only be semi-coloured interested, tinted perhaps, as I won't want to disappoint nearer the time should it turn out I can't make it.
more interuptions again
Good luck to you all going to the pilg I'm not able to get a day or weekend pass.

And in other news, blamelewis is hiding his light under a bushel, so in the time honoured fashion it gives me great pleasure to announce, he is this weeks No1 on the Celebdaq.

The Mother of all Pilgs
...and I can't get there. :(
celebdaq
oooh [Inkspot] Ta for the mention. I suck, but who knows? I may get better! :)
Celeb!
OOh - I hadn't noticed! It's all down to Michael Jackson and Liv Tyler. One of whom I idolise...
Nice things
It's all right, Lewis, they say he's a nice fellow if you dig deep enough. Now, your shout isn't it?
anglo-australian misunderstanding
Gary Packer's a poof!
Or whatever the name was...
Feeling bored
Okay, okay, so I can blame insomnia and lack of common sense for my feeling deserted at this time of night I suppose but where have all the other late-nighters got to?
Late night?
[ZK] It's only 8 PM local time here :)
forgetting international time-difs
Ah yes of course. currently 1.11 am. Am often up far later, which is why I'm so grateful for the game's wide appeal :)
Silent Night
Bit quiet here today? If anyone's epilging tonight I probably won't make it as I think my house is doing Christmas drinks.
The Missing E-Pilgrim....oh, here it is!
I'm in right now.
[Dr Q] I would be, but I need to concentrate on writing this document.
[Dunx] I've taken the liberty of doing that for you.

(Actually, that was done in xfig using splines. Sad to say that's infinitely neater than my actual handwriting.)
[Cross-post] I'm away from today (23/12/2003) until I don't know when (latest, new year's eve). This means that if anything should happen to angrycake.com, I won't be around to resurrect it, and so MC^5 will be down. With any luck, it'll all be fine and dandy, but if it's not, be forewarned.
Just checking ;-)
Still working...
Do you need me at all?
Merry, Merry, Quite Contrary
If I don't get to post before - have a Happy Christmas / midwinter non-culture specific break.
reciprocating
... and you, rabsome one. xxxx
Hurrah!
Christmas cheer all, may your presents be unwoolly and jumperish (or if they are may you have wanted them to be), may your surroundings be loving, may your company be cheerful and may your crackers bring forth crap jokes. xxx
Festivites
Given that it's only just over twelve hours to Christmas Day in my neck of the woods I offer my warmest wishes for Christmas and the New Year to all who read this. I shall think of those of you in cooler climes as I sit back tomorrow in shorts and lightweight top, sipping on something cool, whilst the King Parrots and various versions of Lorikeets dazzle my eyes as they execute precision fly pasts.

Merry Christmas!

bah (sheep?) humbug and other such noises
I'm working all the way through the fun n laughter. Does the NHS ever sleep I wonder?????
[widey] Not in my experience.
lunchtime requests
Can we have an imposters thread? It looks like fun!
Yuletide greetings to all!
At work!!
Merry Xmas to all, particularly those like me who have to go into work.
More holiday cheer
May I wish a pre-emptive Happy Boxing Day to all, and if you're Antipodean, enjoy the tests (despite the NZ-Pak test being delayed for bad light after just 3 overs. Feh!)
testing time
It is Boxing Day here now, stinking hot as usual (11:30am, 34C, 50% humidity)so we're staying in the two airconditioned rooms in the house and playing with new toys. Yesterday was a scorcher too, and the city was completely deserted. It took three hours to finish lunch with relatives and we all just lolled around under the fans until night fell and it was time for a spot of backyard cricket, and then on to the next party. Strangely enough, I didn't feel like having breakfast this morning...
I know you don't really want to know this, but later on...............
I'm going to get very very drunk, which is nice!Happy day of boxing one and all.
Outrageous
Poor Plump! What do you do? I was scheduled to work nights over Christmas, but luckily weaselled out of it - won't be so lucky at New Year though...
Happy Holidays. Oh Yes.
Hmm. I can't wait for work again on Jan 5th. :o(
work
[Breadmaster] I work for BT and yes you've guessed I am in work this weekend as well.
Work?
I, too, am at work, after a freak brownout took out our webserver and several other machines. Feh!
Oh sweet merciful heaven
The voting public have just named Grease the greatest musical of all time. I have lost the last lingering thread of my hope for this country....
Of all time???
Surely you jest!
I jest ye not!!! It beat the sound of music to number one!
And Cats, Joseph, Les Mis, Chorus Line, Top Hat, the Wizard of Oz...I could go on, but it's just too depressing...
TOMMY CAN YOU HEAR ME?
Now, I'm no musical buff...but how does Grease rank above Tommy and Phantom?
It doesn't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My theory is, that it wasn't intentional voting. You see, on these channel 4 polls you can vote for up to 10 of the things on the list. Now, what I'll do on these polls (I didn't know about this one) is vote for the ones I like and if those run out I'll then vote for the ones I've seen and thought were okay. I bet that about 40% of Grease's votes were fom proper fans and that the rest came from these 'leftover' votes of people going "ooh, I liked Grease, I guess that deserves a vote" and the witless ba*ds made it number one!!! I wonder how many people voting for it to do well meant to vote it into that position! You should have heard the screaming in our living room when Sound of Music came up as number two - cos we knew what the only two choices were by then!!
trouble right here in River City...
Are we talking movie or stage here?
A nation [or those that be bothered to vote] decides
My all-time favourite, West Side Story, came fourth, but I have to agree that overall the results indicate some bizarre opinions on what constitutes a 'musical'.
Ta, Chalky
West Side Story - magnificent. Porgy and Bess at No. 77! Sacrilege.
Well, it's a fun and eclectic list, and I'm happy to have Grease in the top 100. But the order is a bit whacky, and given what is on there, I miss The Music Man and Into the Woods (but am tickled to find Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and Bugsy Malone). Probably from the Big Read voters, or the folks at IMDB who would have us believe that Finding Nemo is a better movie than Notorious, Manhattan, The Bicycle Thief or The Graduate...
Durrrr
Well, I have never seen The Sound of Music, West Side Story, or Porgy and Bess, and I liked Grease. Lucky I don't vote in TV polls, really, isn't it?
Grease fans are entitled to their vote but I still don't believe it's the greatest musical ever! [Toby] Both. The oddest thing is that she said two hundred thousand people voted. Oh, I guess that really reflects the opinions of the 5 million strong public, doesn't it? I say that channel 4 never advertises these things properly - always the programmes, but never the votes. I didn't find out about it until the poll was closed. Even this "Musicality" competition they were advertising after it closes on January the 7th - it's the first i've heard of it. Come on, channel 4, put yourself about more!
putting it about
[ZK] I guess Channel 4 were relying on the sponsors, The Daily Mail, to promote and encourage voting, which to be fair, the newspaper did with considerable gusto back in the Autumn. Trouble is, many of our select community are too sniffy to read the aforementioned rag.
the daily mail
or skint....
Breadmaster
I for one am more horrified that Breadmaster has never seen The Sound of Music. How is this possible?
Musicality
Ha! Next he'll be claiming he's never dressed up in fishnets and sung I'm just a sweet transvestite!
Well, just call me uncultured. I'm tone deaf and I don't like musicals, although whether these two things have anything to do with each other is a moot point. I have therefore never sung I'm just a sweet transvestite, but I decline to comment on anything else.
Question?
Question?
Oops.....At what number was Guys n dolls?
G & D
No 36, Widey. Next time you can go find it yourself ... ;-)
Attention, Rosie.
Answering your question in the limerick game - rather than clutter up the thing.
mallee is a low growing eucalypt. There is an area in (I think) N.W. Victoria where these are endemic and which is known as 'The Mallee'.
Standing to attention
OK, Duj - thanks. Nice pong, eucalyptus, probably due to isopropyl and tert-butyl groups attached to an aromatic ring. Better than the assortment of sulphur compounds my aromatic ring tends to produce.
Peg-on-nose
[Rosie] Eee, by gum, lad! The oil of the eucalypt is used for many a 'good' thing; whether or not sulphuric substances fall into any of those catagories is food for thought, though it is oft used as a balm. ;-)
Hrmmph
Catagories s/b categories. .... sorry - brain fade - again.
100 Best Musicals
This passed me by completely -- you see what you miss if you don't stay alert? -- and it turns out to be quite an interesting list. Some predictable injustices -- Sweeney Todd at 80 vs Phantom at 20? No Follies or 42nd Street (the movie, I mean) or The Band Wagon? But it's nice to see Cabaret and West Side Story so high, and indeed (though some will scoff) Once More With Feeling and Moulin Rouge, two sterling attempts to keep the form alive and popular in the 21st century.

The bottom end of the list is probably more interesting than the mainstream top, with unexpected appearances by The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, All That Jazz, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Dancer in the Dark and so on. Was it being made into a (rarely screened) film or just having "Send in the Clowns" that got A Little Night Music onto the list? A good thing, either way. Curious that they list the 1962 film version of Gypsy but the pic and review are for the 1993 TV movie with Bette Midler.

And did anyone really vote for The Jazz Singer (#65) as the "Best Musical"? Historically important, for sure -- but best? Smells a bit fishy to me...

Intermission
Not wishing to interrupt, but I thought I'd just remind people of an impending pilgrimage on the 10th January. More here. Now, back to your usual programming...
100, er, musicals
I was just upset that Hair came in so low (below Starlight Express, for goodness' sake!). I've never seen Once More With Feeling, but the samples they gave left me distinctly unimpressed. Wasn't there a cop series (Cop Rock?) a while ago that did this kind of thing with considerably more style? I, too, missed Into the Woods, among other Sondheims, but his stage-bound nature got him there, I think.
The hills... the hills!
Incidentally, despite liking musicals a lot, I've never seen The Sound of Music either.
more musicals
These are admittedly one my least favoured forms of entertainment, but I did manage a half dazed interest in the top twenty. But I wonder how many of those made in the last 10 years will have a following in 30 years time, hopefully the mistake of Once More With Feeling will have been long forgotten.

Also congrats to blamelewis for his second week on top

What, this is still here? Criminy.
I've some ideas for the May event (provisionally entitled ISIHAC 2 (This time it's unprofessional!) and I've started using the To Be A Pilgrim message board on Orange as the main mixing desk. I've had lots more feedback over Christmas although I'm still hoping to hear from Projoy and Thos - so contact me if you want to help put it together.
contact
[BtD] Beagle-style missive sent off.
The Beagle has landed.
[Btd] Yeah, but is it talking to the mother ship?
A Happy New Year to all you fine, fluffy people. Thank you for letting me sidle in amongst you.
Bonne Annee
Happy New Year to everyone too! (Only 32 minutes before I finish..)
I'm required to leave so the table can be set up for an impending New Year Eve's party. So ... happy new year. See you tomorrow with a hangover, probably.
Happy New Year to all you fine people! Let us drink a toast to the year that has seen the sad demise of PantsMC, and remember all those who *finally sucumbs to the whirling pits and falls down*
knock knock
Happy New Year!
once more with feeling
Bleedin' 'eck, 2004 already? Seems like only yesterday it was 2003. Happy New Year!
Emergency supplies for stray chicken
[Bob] Tomorrow, it seems that I may become foster-mother to a stray chicken. It's too late to tell the full story - but what do I need to get in to make the poor mite comfortable until it's reclaimed? Straw and what ...? I've got budgie food ...
again
By the way - Happy New Year to one and all.
Chicken rescue
Happy New Year too! Chalky] What an odd way to start the new year!
Basics for chicken care - chucks eat:
Grass,
Porridge,
Cabbage, lettuce, any greens,
Grains - preferably corn and wheat - but budgie food may do in the short term,
Worms and stuff they dig up themselves,
And don't forget some water!
If this becomes a long-term thing you'll need to let her have a supply of fine grit too.
If you have a lawn and can set up a small fenced area - four bamboos and some pea netting would do - as day-time housing. An old rabbit hutch would do at night or a very big cardboard box with some chicken wire over the top. If you have sawdust in the bottom of the housing, it helps make poo-disposal easier. Longer-term, stick in a short thick branch (as thick as your fist) for Chuck to perch on at night, and some straw in a corner for it to lay on. And all the best! I'd love to know the story...
arrow_circle_down
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