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Multiple Lines Per Player: A Limericks Special Edition
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Here's an experiment with the Limerick form. In this game (and this one only) it is permissible for players to contribute more than one line each to each limerick, just to see if we can increase the level of coherence in this much-loved form as practised in the Morniverse. Everything else is the same as normal... Take it away!
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a feller from
Caen,
Who
juggled two
logs then went on ... u. s. a. alert
He
next tried with
sticks,
to perform
cunning tricks
But
missed as he
asked what he'd won

A
Who
     When
     It
So

A young
Who was
When all
It went
So sad

A young whippersnapper
Who was singing
    When all others
    It went "Take
So sad his
A young whippersnapper named
Who was singing off-key
When all others lamented
It went "Take Your
So sad his pathetic
A young whippersnapper named
Who was singing off-key
When all others lamented
It went "Take Your
So sad his pathetic
That might have worked if everyone had stuck to the same syllable count when adding. This is my feeble attempt to pull it together:

A young whippersnapper named Jake
Who was singing off-key at Ted's wake
When all others lamented.
It went "Take your rent, Ted" [the off-key song]
So sad his pathetic mistake.
[Chalky] Silk purse out of sow's ear, IMO, good stuff. Let's try another. Maybe we'll get better at it if we practice.
There
Who
     The
     All
And
There was
Who threw
     The old
     All five
And tied
Chalky] Nice finish.
There was a sting-ray
Who threw shrimp
The old octopi
All five chose
And tied that ray
[irach]hope you were aiming at something better than this?
There was a sting-ray named Irach
Who threw shrimp-pate at his flock
The old octopi (and four mates)
All five chose to die (as shark baits)
And tied that ray-gun to his jock
we may need some more practice?
[Randy] I'd have it a little differently:
There was a sting-ray, not so bright,
Who threw shrimp all around in a fight
The old octopi
(All five) chose not to die
And tied that ray up for the night
(still far from brilliant, but scans better :) )

You
Till
    But
    And
So

You said
Till the
    But I
    And you
So I'll
You said you would
Till the cows mooed
But I won't
And you will
So I'll wait in
You said you would stay
Till the cows mooed "Old
But I won't go
And you will just
So I'll wait in York

You said you would stay incognito
Till the cows mooed "Old Faithful" to Tito
But I won't go by
And you will just cry
So I'll wait in York Station. Finito.

[Blob]Excellent ‘finito’ considering raw-material provided!
A humble suggestion: Let’s try it from rear end for once:
vacation,
temptation,
fear,
near,
salvation!

...summer vacation
...to temptation
...never fear
...is near
...your salvation!

...on a summer vacation
...yield to temptation
...safe, never fear
Wonder Woman is near
...be your salvation!
...go on a summer vacation
...not yield to temptation
...are safe, never fear
Wonder Woman is near
...will be your salvation!
 (boring set of moves, that)
Batman, go on a summer vacation
Robin will not yield to temptation
Caves are safe, never fear
Wonder Woman is near
Her magic will be your salvation!
[irach] Well done, squire!
[everyone] How about a first - last - first - last - first word effort? Work backwards from the last words, forwards from the first...? I'm confident in you guys...

There
hated
The
fruit
Of
There was...
...was hated
The waste...
...was fruit
Of what...
There was a...
...truly was hated
The waste basket...
...rotten was fruit
Of what rancid...
hope it's not presumptuous to try finishing
There was a boss whose worth equated
With how much he truly was hated
The waste basket chute
Was rotten was fruit
Of what rancid answers he baited
OK, acrostic time; remember, the subject matter must reflect the word in the acrostic:

S
W
I
F
T

Speeding
While
In
Forever
Tachometers
Speeding down
While the rain
In the dark
Forever
Tachometers
Speeding down country
While the rain spatters
In the dark I
Forever aglow
Tachometers telling
(assuming a stress on "down" there, btw)
I just looked at my last post... "Was rotten was fruit"?? Oi, somehow I read it as "Was rotten WITH fruit", which you must admit makes a lot more sense... now back to your regularly scheduled players with talent.
My first attempt at this manner of Limerick writing. Here goes.
Speeding down country lanes in my lorry
While the rain spatters o'er Tobermory
In the dark I'm gung ho -
Forever aglow -
Tachometers telling their story
[Phil] A splendid effort - first or not.
What's next?
Well done Phil! (but as always winner must start the next, mustn't they... ;-)
Ok then, here goes for another acrostic:
My
Or
Neither
Even
Yet
My fortune
Or else
Neither rust
Even taxes
Yet I
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else
Neither rust
Even taxes
Yet I
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else all my hopes are to fade
Neither rust nor
Even taxes must
Yet I still
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else all my hopes are to fade
Neither rust nor moth doth corrupt
Even taxes must...
Yet I still....
sorry Marc- your stray 'moth' is making life awful difficult for us feeble souls that would wish to complete - any chance of revising?
Please Chalky, feel free to ignore my awfully difficult line. I thought you needed a few xtra syllables to be able to finish line 4? Good luck!
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else all my hopes are to fade
Neither rust nor revising
Even taxes must...
Yet I still...
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else all my hopes are to fade
Neither rust nor to get laid
Even taxes must be paid
Yet I still...
interesting concept with 5 rhyming lines....
My fortune is yet to be made
Or else all my hopes are to fade
Neither rust nor to get laid
(Even taxes must be paid)
Yet I still live my life as a maid
5 rhyming lines is acceptable - however, lines 3 & 4 with 3 beats each is not.
Another acrostic,shall we?
P
A
N
I
C
let's shall.
Perhaps
About
No
I fear
Could
(3,3,3,3,3, so far - so good)
Perhaps when
About time
No longer
I fear that
Could never
Perhaps when our
About time that
No longer will
I fear that swan's
Could never be

[Iroulay] Make it easy, why don't you? :-)

Perhaps when our experts arrive
About time! That means it's past five?
"No longer" Will said,
"I fear that swan's dead."
"Could never be classed as alive"


What
Who
When
Why
How
What matter
Who mutter
When nutters
Why splutter
How utterly
What matter those
Who stutter "F-f-flutter
When nutters whose
Why splutter those
How utterly buttered
What matter those guttersnipe's chatter
Who stutter "F-f-flutter
When nutters whose twitters
Why splutter those
How utterly buttered's my
What matter those guttersnipe's chatter
Who stutter "F-f-flutter" Such patter!
When nutters whose twitters
Why splutter those bitters
How utterly buttered's my batter
[Chalky] Well done, never thought this attempt could be landed safely!
Just a reminder of where we started:
This ‘peri-mental Limerick form
Trying to find its steady-state norm,

Can't help but to flux,
And thus the game's crux -
To gain a safe harbor mid-storm.
How about a seasonal acrostic?

A
P
R
I
L

A Springtime
Pretty
Rosebuds
Incredible
Lovely

A Springtime night frost
Pretty ice crystals
Rosebuds withering
Incredible sad
Lovely white hoarfrost
A Springtime night frost on the lawn
Pretty ice crystals glist`ning at dawn
Rosebuds withering
Incredible sad
Lovely white hoarfrost
 (I had to use a `, because the \\\\\\\' still appears to be adding obliques and I wanted to indicate the scansion)
Is it my fault? Sorry.
- Kill, kill...this limerick I mean.
A Springtime night frost on the lawn
Pretty ice crystals glist`ning at dawn
Rosebuds withering sadly
Incredible sad, so badly
Lovely white hoarfrost, foregone.....
Suggesting another try starting with the end rhymes:
….better,
….wetter,
….got,
….spot,
….get her.
...lot better
...yacht wetter
...pantaloons got
embarrasing spot
...not get her.
...I felt a lot better
...employ a yacht wetter
When her pantaloons got
An embarrassing spot
...I just could not get her.
…anyone having a better (or wetter?) suggestion?
Prince Andrews statement after the Fastnet-race 1985 as he (still somewhat seasick and with a hammering hangover) met with Fergie in Cowes, Isle of Wight (I was there so I know):
Last night as I felt a lot better
I swore to employ a yacht wetter
When her pantaloons got
An embarrassing spot
I knew that I just could not get her

Back to basics, romantic setting, 'Red sails in the sunset...'
While sailing along in the breeze,
Wind steady and life is at ease,
As the sails bulge, I kiss her... Mills and Boone soppy limericks?
I whisper, "I miss yer"
She pukes and goes weak at the knees
I live as a modest young maid
Drink tea while I wait to get laid
And I'm hoping one night
FFS!
Not to be so uptight
With my saucy Aussie from Ad'laide
Dear Chalky, I think that you're mad,
offended, and that makes me sad,
Dear Marc, there's a rumour
You've no sense of humour
What's more - you're nowt but a lad :-)
I frequently eat Parma ham
With lashings of ketchup and jam
For dessert I partake
Of fried pumpkin and hake
No wonder I look like Saddam
I love a nice fragrant Thai dish
It's my very best favourite wish
To dine on Pad Thai
And sip on a Mai Tai
While savouring galangal fish
My armpits are starting to smell
My feet are quite rancid as well
My toes has turned lose
They're stuck in my shoes
I'm blaming this hot, humid spell
I'm off now to get my car mended
The bonnet has somehow got bended
The fog lights are smasht
My rear fender is gashed
All thanks to my being rear-ended
If I had more money, and time
I would give greater thought to this rhyme
As it turns out I don't
And so therefore I won't
Try to do more than dash off this line.
As darkness slides down o'er the hills
I set up my illegal stills
The moonshine I make
I ship over the lake
And sell by the old disused mills.
We need to be true to the cause
And do duty without any pause
Nor thought of the self
Or of grasping for pelf
Let us march to the drumbeat of wars!
Last night he went out to hunt beaver
Just armed with a dreadful meat cleaver
He arrived home today
In complete disarray
Empty-handed and singin' 'Night Fever' .. like you do
Tomorrow the clouds will obscure
My view of the glorious Ruhr
For I am so high
On Cloud 9 in the sky
I won't see anything- that's for sure
I'm spending the night in a tent
In a farmer's field just outside Ghent
I plan to make sure
I get his best manure -
My euros on cr*p won't be spent.
Apols all
Take it from me - he's a cad!
He tells as it is – I’m so glad!
About flowers and bees
(Taught me spreading my knees)
So thankful I am - he's my dad!
In China they have rice with noodles,
Grilled rats and occasion’ly poodles
In Botswana it's lizards
Served with roast ostrich gizzards
Fish and chips? Oh relief! Give me oodles!
The loaf that I wear on my head
Shows I'm clever and also well-bread
There's just no disputin'
My chapeau-plus-gluten
What's more, I'm exceedin' well-fed - [Jux - lovely!]
One don't have a clue 'bout the poor - invoking toffdom for another rind
I just shoo 'em from my door
I tell 'em "Eat Cake"
Appear on Rikki Lake
Saying "Chalky wouldn't gie us no more" invoking commonisms
It's these multiple lines that I dread
Nothing funny takes shape in my head
It’s OK, lim’rick friend,
Let us wait for the end
And find out what someone else said
In this one I need just one line
I get two and that suits me just fine
So I'll give it a go
And then it's my throw
So the fifth line - (the pay-off) - is mine.
I really can't think of a line
That will start off a lim'rick divine
So instead, this'll do
It's over to you
To end in a way that will shine.
Today is a good day to die!
Said the spider who'd captured a fly
Now kindly keep still
And make up your will
While I make a bluebottle-pie
The old lady who swallowed a fly
Washed it down with a cupful of chai
She swallowed the spider
And chased it with cider
The question remains - will she die?
Sojourning awhile in The Hague
I noticed a doorway marked "Plague"
Upon opening I
Found Dutch apple pie
But the connection with plague was quite vague
We left Frances-Bay with the tide,
Two ships in the dawn side by side
But while leaving the port
We found we were short
Of the captain - poor bugger had died.
So we steered a course by the stars
All brave men with swords, most with scars
At the helm boatswain Luke
Being seasick, did puke
O'er the strapping Swede helmsman named Lars.
They sailed but got lost and they stranded
And none of them knew where they’d landed [irach] How did you know my name and part-time occupation? A correction though, I’m not strapping - just well hung (o’r the rail of the yacht when I’m seasick at least)
They'd steered so far right
Home was just back in sight
Their horizons weren't greatly expanded
On that island they thought they'd see Crusoe
But the one they ran into was Clouseau
Who had stranded last year
And he said: “Have no fear”,
"Ay 'av nevar 'ad rezon to rue so."
With multiple lines writ per player
Our wit throve on different air
But this game is now done
And should give way to one
That is new: to hang on were unfair.
*shouts, screams generally goes wild for Raak*
Yes, quite.
This was a nice game and the basic idea was good, most contributors seemed to like it as well. The odd diversions such as starting all five lines in parallel either way was not always a success and may need some time to find a more steady approach. See you out there in the next couple of MANDATORY (!) limerick games...
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