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Multiple Lines Per Player: A Limericks Special Edition
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Here's an experiment with the Limerick form. In this game (and this one only) it is permissible for players to contribute more than one line each to each limerick, just to see if we can increase the level of coherence in this much-loved form as practised in the Morniverse. Everything else is the same as normal... Take it away!
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As the sails bulge, I kiss her... Mills and Boone soppy limericks?
I whisper, "I miss yer"
She pukes and goes weak at the knees
I live as a modest young maid
Drink tea while I wait to get laid
And I'm hoping one night
FFS!
Not to be so uptight
With my saucy Aussie from Ad'laide
Dear Chalky, I think that you're mad,
offended, and that makes me sad,
Dear Marc, there's a rumour
You've no sense of humour
What's more - you're nowt but a lad :-)
I frequently eat Parma ham
With lashings of ketchup and jam
For dessert I partake
Of fried pumpkin and hake
No wonder I look like Saddam
I love a nice fragrant Thai dish
It's my very best favourite wish
To dine on Pad Thai
And sip on a Mai Tai
While savouring galangal fish
My armpits are starting to smell
My feet are quite rancid as well
My toes has turned lose
They're stuck in my shoes
I'm blaming this hot, humid spell
I'm off now to get my car mended
The bonnet has somehow got bended
The fog lights are smasht
My rear fender is gashed
All thanks to my being rear-ended
If I had more money, and time
I would give greater thought to this rhyme
As it turns out I don't
And so therefore I won't
Try to do more than dash off this line.
As darkness slides down o'er the hills
I set up my illegal stills
The moonshine I make
I ship over the lake
And sell by the old disused mills.
We need to be true to the cause
And do duty without any pause
Nor thought of the self
Or of grasping for pelf
Let us march to the drumbeat of wars!
Last night he went out to hunt beaver
Just armed with a dreadful meat cleaver
He arrived home today
In complete disarray
Empty-handed and singin' 'Night Fever' .. like you do
Tomorrow the clouds will obscure
My view of the glorious Ruhr
For I am so high
On Cloud 9 in the sky
I won't see anything- that's for sure
I'm spending the night in a tent
In a farmer's field just outside Ghent
I plan to make sure
I get his best manure -
My euros on cr*p won't be spent.
Apols all
Take it from me - he's a cad!
He tells as it is – I’m so glad!
About flowers and bees
(Taught me spreading my knees)
So thankful I am - he's my dad!
In China they have rice with noodles,
Grilled rats and occasion’ly poodles
In Botswana it's lizards
Served with roast ostrich gizzards
Fish and chips? Oh relief! Give me oodles!
The loaf that I wear on my head
Shows I'm clever and also well-bread
There's just no disputin'
My chapeau-plus-gluten
What's more, I'm exceedin' well-fed - [Jux - lovely!]
One don't have a clue 'bout the poor - invoking toffdom for another rind
I just shoo 'em from my door
I tell 'em "Eat Cake"
Appear on Rikki Lake
Saying "Chalky wouldn't gie us no more" invoking commonisms
It's these multiple lines that I dread
Nothing funny takes shape in my head
It’s OK, lim’rick friend,
Let us wait for the end
And find out what someone else said
In this one I need just one line
I get two and that suits me just fine
So I'll give it a go
And then it's my throw
So the fifth line - (the pay-off) - is mine.
I really can't think of a line
That will start off a lim'rick divine
So instead, this'll do
It's over to you
To end in a way that will shine.
Today is a good day to die!
Said the spider who'd captured a fly
Now kindly keep still
And make up your will
While I make a bluebottle-pie
The old lady who swallowed a fly
Washed it down with a cupful of chai
She swallowed the spider
And chased it with cider
The question remains - will she die?
Sojourning awhile in The Hague
I noticed a doorway marked "Plague"
Upon opening I
Found Dutch apple pie
But the connection with plague was quite vague
We left Frances-Bay with the tide,
Two ships in the dawn side by side
But while leaving the port
We found we were short
Of the captain - poor bugger had died.
So we steered a course by the stars
All brave men with swords, most with scars
At the helm boatswain Luke
Being seasick, did puke
O'er the strapping Swede helmsman named Lars.
They sailed but got lost and they stranded
And none of them knew where they’d landed [irach] How did you know my name and part-time occupation? A correction though, I’m not strapping - just well hung (o’r the rail of the yacht when I’m seasick at least)
They'd steered so far right
Home was just back in sight
Their horizons weren't greatly expanded
On that island they thought they'd see Crusoe
But the one they ran into was Clouseau
Who had stranded last year
And he said: “Have no fear”,
"Ay 'av nevar 'ad rezon to rue so."
With multiple lines writ per player
Our wit throve on different air
But this game is now done
And should give way to one
That is new: to hang on were unfair.
*shouts, screams generally goes wild for Raak*
Yes, quite.
This was a nice game and the basic idea was good, most contributors seemed to like it as well. The odd diversions such as starting all five lines in parallel either way was not always a success and may need some time to find a more steady approach. See you out there in the next couple of MANDATORY (!) limerick games...
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