mc5 - World's Worsest

"Well, the good news is you don't need to worry about the government raising the pension age."

"The baby seems healthy enough on the ultrasound, but it looks like those claws are designed so it can cut its way out on its own."

Dandalf

I'll give you something for the pain. It was a vasectomy you came in for wasn't it?

Projoy

Just before we give you the anaesthetic, do you mind if I ask you how you voted in the last election?

Falstaff

"I am not a real doctor, but I did play one on the BBC." [nights] i am taking it on the lam! but it wasn't me, honest, it was the one-armed man.