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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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Has the vegetable part been processed in order to be a part of this?
Is it used by artists?
Does it contain writing?
Is the mineral part mostly or usually wood?
Oh my God - the bifurcation's spreading
Is part of it metal?
[Iroleguy]I thought wood as a vegetable?
Is it something that can be made from either natural or artificial substances? (eg rubber or neoprene)
[Raak] Vegetable Processed? Yes
[Raak] Used by artists? It can be.
[Darren] Contain writing? No.
[Irouleguy] Mineral part wood? No. And neither is the vegatable part.
[Inkspot] Part metal? No. [Rosie] Can be made from natural or artificial substances? Yes. (Some applause.)
[Irouleguy] er, or the vegetable part.
A paintbrush?
Ink?
[Raak] Paintbrush? No.
[Darren] Ink? (Major applause). Very close, but I want something more precise.
Is it used in a domestic environment?
[Chalky] It is not typically used anywhere. (Well, I can think of one place.) But focus on Darren's answer -- he has basically gotten there.
(And yes, it can be used by artists, as I said. But normally you would not think of this as something that was being used.)
Well, it is gone midnight here in Singapore, and I am about to go to bed. And so, since Darren really did get the answer, I think I should pass the baton to him, rather than keep you all waiting until tomorrow. I was surprised how hard it was to answer some of those questions; my apologies if I misled in any way. The exact answer I was looking for was:

An Inkspot.
CdM] Nice one
self] Write out 'Wood is not a mineral' 100 times
Thanks to CdM! (It's the second time I've won one of these on a "ohhh... close enough"!) [Irouleguy] What about petrified wood?
Now we are Abstract.
Is it a human construct?
Is it an action?
Is it part of, or found in, all cultures?
Darren] True...
Is it a belief system?
Is it related to music?
[Rosie] Yes, but not necessarily. But yes.
{Inkspot] Yes.
[Irouleguy] I'm not sure if it's found in all, but certainly many.
[Gusset Login] No.
[Tuj] Indirectly, it can be.
[Rosie] Actually, just make that yes.
Is it a narrative activity?
Is it a physical activity?
[Raak] No.
[Irouleguy] Yes.
Dancing?
[Raak] No.
Is it a sport of some kind?
Is it done with the whole body?
Does it involve more than one person?
Is it something that only humans can do?
sorry - I think you've answered that last one already with your 'human construct' answer.
Is it restricted to adults only?
[CdM] Mostly no, although some people treat it like one.
[Inkspot] No.
[Gusset Login] Yes.
[Chalky] (1) Well, this is the reason for my vagueness about the "human construct." I'm going to say yes and no, depending on how you look at it. (2) No.
[Gusset Login] I need to be a bit more vague again. A better answer is this: normally yes, but sometimes no.
Is it a game?
[Chalky] No.
Whistling?
[Irouleguy] No.
Sex?
[Raak] I was waiting for someone to say this. No, it's not sex.
Waving
[Inkspot] No.
Drowning? (oblig.)
Is the part of the body the head, or part of the head?
Does it involve communication of one form or another?
Is it legal?
[Irouleguy] (1) No. (2) What part of the body?! I never mentioned a part of the body.
[Kim] Yes.
[Gusset Login] Yes.
talking?
[Inkspot] No.
[Irouleguy] (2) I wasn't really fair there, was I? The answer is generally no.
Acting?
[Raak] No.
txtng?
Do you need equipment of some sort to do it?
[Raak] No.
[Chalky] No.
I'll provide a clue if anyone wants one.
Summary
It is...a human construct, an action, found in many (if not all) cultures, a physical activity, involving communication of some sort, legal
It could be...related to music (indirectly), a solo activity
It is not...a narrative activity, dancing, a sport (though some people treat it like one), done with the whole body, a game, whistling, sex, waving, drowning, restricted to humans, talking, acting, txting [sic], done with equipment, generally done with the head

I'm having trouble with the idea that this is a human construct but not restricted to humans. So, yes, a clue might help, but I'll have a couple of guesses as well.
praying?
pointing?
[Irouleguy] No, and no.
Here's a clue: Raak has guessed a number of activities which can be associated with this. Not always, of course, but certainly sometimes. In essence, you're getting towards the right area.
And in response to Irouleguy's doubts, there is at least one type of animal (other than humans) which can do this activity, although I don't think it does it for the same reason!
Performing?
[Chalky] No.
Is this something which would be acceptable if performed in public?
Well, Raak has guessed dancing, sex, and acting...
Yoga?
[Dujon] Depends where you do it, but generally yes.
[Raak] No.
[CdM] What would you hope would go with them?
Smoking ?
Drinking alcohol?
[Chalky] No and no. (You're getting colder.)
Partying?
[Raak] No.
Applauding?
Drinking alcohol?
Oops, didn't notice Chalky just asked that,
Conversation?
[Irouleguy] YES!!!! (Well, actually it was "a ripple of applause" but you're easily close enough.) Just to explain my animal comments above, I don't think I imagined seals clapping in circuses.
[Raak] (1) No. (2) No.

So, Irouleguy is in the driving seat for the next lap.

WOO-HOO!
Darren] No you didn't imagine that - it was when you said one type of animal that I started to work it out.
Anyway, this is something else completely different - MINERAL
Antimony?
Mainly metallic?
Tuj] Antimony? No
Darren] Mainly metallic? No
Is it a monument?
Is it man-made?
Is it a single thing?
Inkspot] Is it a monument? No
Darren} Is it man-made? No
Raak] Is it a single thing? Um...yes and no. It's a collective noun, like 'the Alps' (but it's not a mountain range).
Is it a geographical feature?
Is it, collectively, larger than the Earth?
Is it an astronomical feature?
ImNotJohn] Is it a geographical feature? No
Darren] Is it, collectively, larger than the Earth? Um...define 'larger'.
Raak] Is it an astronomical feature? Yes *murmurs of approval from the audience*
Is it outside the Solar System?
Is it a consellation of stars?
consellation/constellation
Is it the Oort Cloud?
Darren] Is it outside the Solar System? No
Inkspot] Is it a constellation of stars? No. (I'd consider a constellation mineral/abstract.)
CdM] Is it the Oort Cloud? No - but closer
The asteroids?
Raak] The asteroids? No
The solar wind?
The rings of Saturn?
The Milky Way?
Rings around Uranus?
....and stop sniggering at the back
Raak] The solar wind? No
Darren] The rings of Saturn? YES!! We have a winner! And so the baton passes straight back to Darren.
OK, well, I'm back in the chair, it seems.
This one is MINERAL.
Is it man made?
[Inkspot] Yes.
Is it typically used inside?
Does it use electricity?
Is it mainly used for work, or for enjoyment?
[CdM] Inside the house, you mean? If so, yes.
[Raak] Yes.
[Irouleguy] These days, the latter.
A computer?
[Raak] Yes, but I need you to be more precise.
A computer running Windows?
An Amstrad?
A Macintosh?
[Raak] (1) No.
[Irouleguy] No.
[Raak] (2) No.
Is it a specific make or model of computer?
A BBC?
[Raak] Yes.
[Irouleguy] Close, but not close enough.
BBC Model B?
A BBC Acorn?
BBC Model A (Acorn)
[Raak] No.
[Irouleguy] A BBC Acorn? No such thing. Acorn produced all the BBC computers via a licensing deal.
[Inkspot] No.
Sinclair Spectrum?
[Raak] No (colder).
A Commodore 64?
[Raak] No, equally cold.
Hm, what's on the hot side of a BBC from a C64 or a Spectrum?
Is this type of computer still in current use (other than by retro geeks)?
Is it a BBC 'something'?
[Raak] No.
[Chalky] No.
I did give you a clue before. Remember, the BBC didn't make the BBC Micro - it was made by Acorn. So, what you might be looking for here is another (retro, we've established) computer made by Acorn, of which there were several.
Was this model named after a minute 'object'? - there's two I can think of.
Acorn Atom?
.. the one that was launched in 1980, she says knowledgeably.
Google? Wassat then :-)
Acorn Archimedes
Absolutely fascinated when reading the story about what they did back then
[Dujon] Yes.
[Chalky] No, too early.
[Inkspot] No, too recent.
The clues, together with Inkspot's posting of the history, strongly suggest the Electron.
[Raak] Absolutely so. It is indeed the Acorn Electron. CORRECT! It's Raak's turn.
The next is VEGETABLE
Is it edible?
Is it edible?
Sorry.
Is it commonly found indoors?
Is it a vegetable?
Is it something that has been processed?
[Darren] No.
[Tuj] It can be.
[Chalky] No.
[CdM] Yes.
Is it an item of furniture?
[Darren] No.
A crucifix?
YES
Game to Irouleguy.
Wow, that was quick.
Hell's bells!
I suspect telepathy!
Raak set it on Good Friday - what else could it have been? Do I sense someone else who grew up Catholic? Anyway, our next subject was also a cause of anguish and tension, albeit on a much smaller scale. It's VEGETABLE/MINERAL, ABSTRACT and the colour's a sort of clue.
Anything to do with Ireland?
Desultory Church of Scotland, actually.
Raak] Anything to do with Ireland? A very faint connection, but a misleading one
CoS? Is that like Anglican?
The green eye of the little yellow god?
Anglican? Certainly not, Anglicans are almost Papist idolaters from the point of view of the CoS. On the other hand, it can't really be described as Protestant either. It's full, Sunday best title has the word "Episcopalian" in it somewhere, but I don't have much idea what that means. Just one of the meaningless background elements of childhood.
Raak] The green eye of the little yellow god? No - actually 'clue' may be something of an exaggeration. More of a set of lateral thinking connections, really. The colour's really not the best way to get there.
Is it the title of a book?
Does it have punctuation in it?
Is it a fictional object?
Is this something to do with grass?
Inkspot] Is it the title of a book? No
Tuj] Does it have punctuation in it? Yes (odd question)
Darren] Is it a fictional object? Yes
Dujon] Is this something to do with grass? No. Really, I'm sorry I ever mentioned the colour.
Is the vegetable part wood?
Would it be found underground?
Irouleguy] Of course an odd question! What else would be expected though? Anyway, could be more useful than the green thing.
Raak] Is the vegetable part wood? Yes
Tuj] Would it be found underground? No
It was a comment, not a criticism, and it probably will be more useful than the green thing.
Is the mineral part metal fixings of some sort?
Raak] Is the mineral part metal fixings of some sort? Yes, but there's other (more important) mineral parts as well.
Is this a tool with a wooden handle and metal business end?
Is it part of the folklore of a particular people?
Is this a weapon?
Is the apostrophe a possessive one?
Raak] Is this a tool with a wooden handle and metal business end? No
Inkspot] Is it part of the folklore of a particular people? No
Dujon] Is this a weapon? No
Tuj] Is the apostrophe a possessive one? Yes
Harry Potter's staff?
Is the mineral a gem stone?
Raak] Harry Potter's staff? No, but thinking along the right lines
Inkspot] Is the mineral a gem stone? No *audience launches into karaoke version of Michelle Shocked's 'Anchorage'*
The Mona Lisa's Smile
Does have connections with Lords of the Ring?
'Cos if it does I'll back out as I know sweet nuffin' about it.
Inkspot] The Mona Lisa's Smile? No
Dujon] Does it have connections with The Lord of the Rings? No
Does the fictional work date from 1950 or later?
Is it from a television series?
Does it have any magical properties?
Raak] Does the fictional work date from 1950 or later? No
Inkspot] Is it from a television series? No
Darren] Does it have any magical properties? No

Do we want a clue?
Is the object man made?
Prospero's staff?
With Inkspot's and Raak's questions immediately above to be answered, the state of the nation seems to be (I hope I've not missed something):

It is not/does not:

The eye of the little yellow god
The title of a book
A tool with wooden handle and metal business end
Have anything to do with grass
Not found underground
Part of fokelore of a particlar people
A weapon
Harry Potter's staff - but the right line of thinking
Contain a gem stone
The Mona Lisa smile
Have connection with Lord of the Rings
From a television series
Have magical properties

It is/does:

Have a very faint connection with Ireland but this would be misleading
Have punctuation in it
Fictional
Wood in the vegetable part
Contain a possessive apostrophe
Have metal fixings of some sort - but there's (more important) mineral parts as well
Pre-date 1950

Inkspot] Is the object man made? Yes
Raak] Prospero's staff? No, but the answer could be said to lie on a point midway between two of Raak's guesses
Dujon] A good summary
Is it somebody's staff?
Darren] Is it somebody's staff? No
Was it supposed to belong to a particular person?
Does it have a knob on the end?
Darren] Was it supposed to belong to a particular person? Not sure what this means. It does belong to a particular person - the form of the answer is {person's name}'s {object}.
Raak] Does it have a knob on the end? I refer the honourable gentleman to my last answer but one.
Is it any sort of ship?
Was the owner a real person?
[Irouleguy] Re: the "particular person" question. That was what I meant.
Is it too heavy for a single person to lift?
Is it something that is worn?
Raak] Is it any sort of ship? No
Darren - Was the owner a real person? No
CdM - Is it too heavy for a single person to lift? Good question - yes
Inkspot - Is it something that is worn? No
Is it something large enough that a human could get inside?
Is it a building?
Darren] Is it something large enough that a human could get inside? No
Raak] Is it a building? No
Is the object made from stone?
is it connected with transport?
Would it help me if I understood your reference to "Anchorage"?
'Cos, like, maybe I'm being dumb, but I know that song pretty well, and yet I have no idea what you were getting at...
Was Shakespeare the author of the fictional work in question?
Inkspot] Is the object made from stone? No
Chalky] Is it connected with transport? No
CdM - Would it help me if I understood your reference to "Anchorage"? No.
Sorry - it was just a joke about being cold. It's the only song I know about Alaska.
CdM - Was Shakespeare the author of the fictional work in question? No
Could a human wrap his/her arms around it?
When you said "Harry Potter's staff" was the "right line of thinking" did you mean something more than that it was of the form {person's name}'s {object}?
Is it time for me to shut up and let someone else ask a question?
19th century?
Is the person's name more than one word?
CdM] Could a human wrap his/her arms around it? Almost certainly not
CdM] When you said "Harry Potter's staff" was the "right line of thinking" did you mean something more than that it was of the form {person's name}'s {object}? No
CdM] Is it time for me to shut up and let someone else ask a question? Not at all - they're good questions and it's not that busy today
Raak] 19th century? Yes
Darren] Is the person's name more than one word? Yes
A clue for Friday afternoon
The person in the answer shares a name with the author of the fictional work.
Lady Windermere's Fan?
Is the fictional work - a film?
Is the fictional work - a play?
Raak] Lady Windermere's Fan? No, but in several respects the closest approach yet.
Chalky] Is the fictional work - a film? Not originally, but it has been filmed.
Chalky] Is the fictional work - a play? No
Was the fictional work originally written in English?
Was the film made before 1950?
Is there more than one filmed version (including cinematic and television versions, if applicable)?
Is it an item of furniture?
Is it anything to do with Oscar Wilde, or in fact Dorian Gray, and am I allowed to ask more than one question at a time?
Tom Brown's Schooldays?
As abstract as you get
buit it's not the title of a book.....*retracts already abstract answer*
CdM] Was the fictional work originally written in English? Yes
Inkspot] Was the film made before 1950? No, for all versions (see below)
Darren] Is there more than one filmed version (including cinematic and television versions, if applicable)? Yes, according to IMBd three (one cinematic, two television). Obligatory trivia - the actor playing the person in the answer in the first TV version was once in Blake's seven, and also has a connection to the colour clue.
Raak] Is it an item of furniture? Yes, though that's not its primary function
ZK] Is it anything to do with Oscar Wilde, or in fact Dorian Gray, and am I allowed to ask more than one question at a time? No, and no, and apparently yes
ZK] Tom Brown's Schooldays? I refer the honourable gentleman to his subsequent answer
Is the entire answer a phrase that is in reasonably common use?
(For example, do you think it would be an acceptable solution in a crossword?)
CDM] Is the entire answer a phrase that is in reasonably common use? No - it'd only really be acceptable in a crossword if the whole crossword was themed around the author.
Is the author Dickens?
Is the person male?
is it a musical instrument?
Regarding the mineral part: (a) is it in part glass? (b) you said there are "metal fixings" but are there also other metal parts?
is it a timepiece of any kind?
Raak] Is the author Dickens? No
Darren] Is the person male? No
ZK]Is it a musical instrument? Yes
CdM] Regarding the mineral part: (a) is it in part glass? (b) you said there are "metal fixings" but are there also other metal parts? (a) No; (b) Yes
ZK] Is it a timepiece of any kind? No
Is it a piano?
I can't think of anyone who has a piano except in Jane Austen novels so I don't know why I'm asking!
Having a guess
Did Jane Fairfax have a piano?
*applauds*
You have definitely got the right person (having checked all the imdb clues). And I am guessing that the piano is right as well.
ZK - YES!!! Congratulations! I'd thought after the last round of answers that someone must get it soon. The colour clue is that everyone thought that the piano was a gift to Jane Fairfax from the Dixons, which leads by association to Dixon of Dock Green, which Ania Marson, who played Jane Fairfax in the first TV version of Emma, appeared in a number of times. I did say it wasn't so much a clue as a lateral association which wouldn't help...
I'll shut up now and hand over the baton to ZK.
thank god for that
I don't know why, but I developed an obsession with this round! I'm glad my brain worked the right way....eventually.....shame on me because I've only read Emma once! I do own that version, though. I think I got it for my 13th birthday. I must say I didn't get any of the Dixon clues. Anyway...
What was the irish connection?
I guess this is ABSTRACT with ANIMAL connections.
A constellation?
[Raak] No. But cool :)
Are the connections to a specific animal?
[Tuj] Yes.
Would this animal have appeared in an animated film and a musical?
[Dujon]Certainly, but I suspect you're barking up the wrong tree.
Toto?
Is the animal human?
[Raak] No.
[Gusset Login] Yes! Yay :)
Are they female?
Are they best known for the animated film/musical?
Sorry, the Irish connection. JF had been with the Dixons in Ireland before she came to Highbury.
Anything to do with Gilbert & Sullivan?
Is it connected with religion?
Anything to do with Walt Disney?
Would you like an extra strong mint?
Female?
What are your major influences?
Is it one human or a group of them?
Could you hold this for a second?
Can I quote you?
Did you threaten to overrule him?
Was the person written about before 1900?
Did you *threaten* to overrule him?
Would you like a cup of tea and a Hob-nob?
Is there any truth to the rumors?
Did you THREATEN to overrule him?
Can I count on your vote?
I say, are you still there?
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