Michael Grade has just been appointed Director General of the BBC, and, true to form, wants a clearout. Please provide inappropriate sentences that sound the death knell for a radio or television programme (for example: The Money Programme - Has anyone got 50p for the meter? or Upstairs Downstairs - "Rose! We're moving into a bungalow!"). Since Grade believes that he has God-like powers, you don't have to stick to the BBC.
- "No, nothing to declare.... Yes, yes that's me in the passport photo, admittedly the picture was taken a few years ago and I didn't have the beard then... No, I haven't any previous convictions for anything of the kind, I told you - I'm here on behalf of the Beeb, doing a report on your government's Human Rights record. These guys are my technicians, yes, all my papers are in order... What? ... No, I don't see why you need to open the case, but if it'll keep you happy I - wait, why is he putting on those gloves? Hey now, just a minute! Hey, get your filthy hands off of - Get off! Help! Help! Call the British Embassy before they stick their hands up my -" [Transmission Ends]
-"The Late Jeremy Bowen there, with a report on the situation in Zimbabwe, which he recorded earlier today."
They Think It's All Over - Just too easy, isn't it?
"I've found love on the internet. He's an account, works in New York, so I've decided to move to the Big Apple, leave the wide open country and settle down in a city apartment on the edge of Manhatten. Goodbye, I'll write you." Star in their Eyes
"And now, a word from our sponsor, Johnny Walker Whisky. Is your commute down the motorway a grind? Do you get tense, irritable, angry? Take a bottle of Johnny Walker with you to soothe your cares away. Relax, put the pedal to the floor, and fly down the fast lane with Johnny Walker."