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Limerick Showcase
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A chance for players to showcase whole limericks for amusement & edification. Standard winning move for the purposes of euthanasia.
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It's the last Test for Alistair Cook
Who can now go and write a large book
About caring for sheep
With a square leg that's deep
And a Gray-Nicolls bat for a crook.
Let's go on a jaunt down to Florida!
We'll drive the I-95 corridor
And in this big van
Go as far as we can
Till the neighbours find out that we borrowed 'er.
Rosie, Raak, Software, Pablo, and CdM provided this on this site. Having just read an article on FOMMOG - Fear Of Meeting My Own Goals, which could form a new game - I felt this summed the subject up better than the article.

My mother said I should not
Complain of my God-given lot
But I feel I'm deprived
As I have not arrived
Where by now I should surely have got.


The life of a Scotsman in Liskey
Can – literally – be pretty risky,
'cause once in a bar
When rolling an ‘r’
The chap found an ‘e’ in his whisky.
In my mind's eye, I see this great wall
And behind it we'll have such a ball.
It's manned by bald eagles -
Keeps us free of illegals -
I'll be re-elected next fall!

Building walls is a question of will
Which the Dems that are now on the Hill
Have never possessed:
But mine is the best,
And the Chicos are footing the bill!
A good friend of mine told me how
The Sixties were better than now:
When, with no sense of guilt,
His boss had a wall built
Round Berlin, by soldiers, from Moscow.
And this one I heard in the Army
There was an old man of the Isles
Who had measles, consumption and piles
On top of all these,
Yes - venereal disease
You could smell the old bugger for miles.
Found this anonymus pearl at the side of a statue of Winston Churchill:
There was a young man from Dundee
who said: "They can't do without me.
No house is complete,
without me and my seat.
My initials are W.C."
(Must be an alternativa Winston...?)
There's a chap from the Mull of Kintyre
Who does dubious things with barbed wire
I could tell you a tale
That would make you go pale
But you'd probably call me a liar.
[Marc] I believe Winston lost the seat of Oldham early in his career, and got 'parachuted' in to represent Dundee as a way of returning to the Commons.
(checks) Sorry, not Oldham, Machester North West.
[Marc, Projoy] I thought that ditty was witty in the combining the Dundee MP with household conveniences. Well, it made me laugh anyway. ;)
Where I hoped an opener on MCIOS might go...
If you like, I'll put in a word
That you'd like to play Richard the Third
On the Lyttleton stage
Despite your old age
Though there's bugger all chance you'll be heard

So Theresa has gone off to Brussels
For a feed of hot chips and steamed mussels
To seek a new deal
At a Head-of-State meal
Getting nowhere, for all that she hustles
The place of her wedding is set
At the cost of penurious debt
I don't see the need
Of why I have to feed
80 relatives that I've never met
A                      whose                      and clucked
Was                      when he                      and                     
                     with his                     
And                      was in                     
The                     , he said I am                     .
[penelope] The version I know is:
"Fu**! Sh**!" listen who swears.
Christopher Robin has fallen downstairs.
On first looking into GPT-2's Homer:

It sounds like the real thing, for sure
But will its works really endure?
Or does its success
Mean that we must confess
That "real" poetry's just as obscure?

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