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... so help me God.
help
I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth...
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Liberal Democrats have no spin, leg or off. Luckily Charles Kennedy is a fast bowler.
I have posted in this game every day since I was born.
I wasn't born, I congealed.
I have never attempted to collect my farts in any type of glass container.
I have never farted.
My other car is a porch.
There were originally four coins in the fountain, but the fourth one left over artistic differences.
Meatloaf was later shown to have done that aswell, although in his defense it wasn't for love.
I bet you lot all feel embarrassed that you accidentally posted unbolded all this time eh?
My use of italics here is purely accidental and coincidental.
My use of italics here is because I am Italian
Everyone I know is excited about the forthcoming council elections.
Short-sightedness can be temporarily cured by being breathed on by a chicken.
Pope Urban IV was personally responsible for the creation of ninety-six different varieties of cheese.
Octopi can play the bagpipes, but refuse to on the grounds that it makes them look silly.
My employers weekly timesheet includes for non-productive codes, these include sick leave, annual leave, smoking break, coffee break, newspaper reading, idle chatter and non work related internet browsing.
My real name is Tog and I live in Pogles Wood.
Stealing the Mona Lisa is so easy it's like taking candy from a baby.
Why, I've stolen the Mona Lisa ten times if I've stolen it once.
Taking candy from a baby is a capital offence in Florida.
I'm going to rock down to electric avenue, and then I'll take it higher.
Manchester United often pop round to my flat for a quick massage.
Cair Paravel in the Narnia Books was actually converted into a castle from yuppie flats.
L. Frank Baum had a rare microbial stomach infestation that made him tunnel into doors and subsist on wood chippings.
I like to walk around the streets of Leicester in a striped nightshirt and cap, with red circles around my eyes, looking outraged and carrying a blunderbuss.
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