mc5 - ... so help me God.

I invented the letter ð, but only the Icelanders were brave enough to use it.

Dutch was invented by an Austrian chef with a severe head-cold.

I recently bent a barman's ear but a panel beater has sorted all that out.

Bent barman's ears are an aphrodisiac, recently popularised by Sex In The City.

I did not go to bed at seven PM yester eve because a good book and a lie down was more attractive than the pap being served up on 'the box'.