mc5 - ... so help me God.

I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth...

I've had no problem since they redesignated Guinness as a fruit.

A whole bottle of syrup of figs counts as one of your five-a-day

Although most people think of tomatoes as a vegetable, they are actually a sort of weasel.

I eat five grapes a day, then go out for pizza.

I eat five pizzas a day and then go out for grapes.