The Union of Evil Henchmen has instructed us to refuse any tasks not required by our contract until the management (that is, you) agree to talks without preconditions on an equitable pay rise for all employees while maintaining proper differentials between Henchmen, Minions, and Underlings.

But we've talked it all through, and we really want a kitten. Please?

(Voice Mode=Sergeant Wilson) The third switch? Do you think that's wise sir?

But sir, that would be wrong.

I always wear my lucky underpants when we go visiting only thing is this will be the third time this week.

(During the job interview, when asked where you see yourself in five years:) Replacing you, sir.

... 'an I sez to the old girl "You looking at me then?" when she says "Yeah!", I helped 'er cross the road safely like.

Welcome back master! While you were out I threw out all that nasty dirt in your coffin and gave it a good scrub with the water from the old church font.

"Oh dear ... tell me THAT is not *blood*. Because, if that is *blood* I am going to faint dead away."

"Sorry, I forgot again. Does the two quick claps thing mean 'take him away' or 'throw him to the floor'?"

"Why can't I commute? I don't want to live under a volcano."

But master, your enemy is but a single callow youth. What threat can he possibly pose?

Look, y' knew the deal when y' borrered the money from Big Tony. If y' can't pay woss owed we're going to have to give you another three month extension on the dealine and reduce the payments again.