The count has been counted, Returning Officers have returned, and party rosettes have been trampled underfoot in the Town Hall Chamber at the end of election night.
Get your glad rags on for the Local Party Election Victory Ball at the Town Hall Ballroom, 7.30pm for 8pm, black tie, carriages at midnight. But there are bound to be one or two late-comers...
Expose more Expose all
irach - Ah, and her come Mrs.Buktu and her husband Tim, Mrs. Geria and her husband Al and Dr. Insula and his lovely wife Penelope, that's Pen to us all.
Phil - Mrs & Mrs Eria have brought their son Nige and their daughter Lib. And I see Mr Congo has completed his PhD, and is now DR Congo.
nfras - Please welcome Mr. Tinentaldrift and his son Con. Heralding the arrival of Mrs. Wan and her daughter Tai, sorry, the young lady is now married to Mr. Pei. Late as usual we have Mr. and Mrs. Skye and their lovely daughter Isla.
irach - Here comes Mrs. Rocco, accompanied by her man Mo, Mr. Ablanca and his wife Cass, Mrs. Geria and her husband Al, and Mrs. Tius with her husband Maury.
Dandalf - And,arriving undercover - Q, keeper of spy gadgets for the IRA.
irach - Here's the gangster Don Davia accompanied by his moll, followed close on their heels by his ex-moll Ms. Ube, all dressed in blue, accompanied by her new gangster beau, Dan, and ahh, here come the Polis sisters, Anna and Minnie A.
nfras - Here come Mr and Mrs River and their two sons, Niall and Clyde. And following close behing them is Mr Issippi and his unmarried daughter, the beautiful Miss.
irach - Look who's now arriving- it's none other than Mr. Jevo with his wife Sara, Mrs Aragua and her husband Nick, Mrs. Vador with her lovely daughters Elle and Sal; oh! here come Master Raguay and little Miss Kistan who're both here with their Pas , Mr. Aide whose arrived with his lady Adele, and finally the henpecked Mrs. Oya with his wife- she's a real nag!
Botherer - The incredibly gifted lab Tech, Ms Cplates, familiarly known as Toni.
irach - Here comes Mr. Ir with his wife Pam, Mrs. Otho has just arrived accompanied by her hubby Les; Oh! here's Mr. Tok and his gang, and now arriving Mr. Tucket and his lovely wife Nan and his daday, affectionately known as Paw and finally Mrs. Bany who's arrived with husband Al.
Botherer - Over a week since I last looked and only one? Time to refresh with
SPORTING EVENTS BALL

And first up to the post, the delightful matriach d'National, affectionately known to all as Gran.
Dandalf - Here they come, making a terrible racket, Ms. Nis and her Ten kids
Rosie - Will you please welcome Mr and Mrs Perbowl and their daughter Sue.
irach - Here comes Ms. Jumping with her fiance Bernard Graham, popularly known to all as Bern G., Mrs. Polo's now arrived with her husband Walter; ah! here comes Mrs. Kerr with her hubby ChuckImpic-Games with her man Olly and Mr. Thon and his lovely wife Mara.
Rosie - Please be upstanding for Mr and Mrs DVvanstrophysemifinalsecondlegdecidedonpenalties and their daughter Elle.
Software - Please welcome from the USA Mr and Mrs Erofpolo and their son Chuck.
Irouléguy - Please stand back and allow the caretakers to remove the picture over the mantelpiece - we had thought it was an original Upfinal, but I'm afraid it's proved to be a Fake.
Software - Also from the US of A Mr and Mrs Ations and their young daughter, Fawn.
Robin - And a welcome please for Mr and Mrs Ing-Cup and their son Carl.
Rosie - A big hand please for Mr and Mrs Spoonrace and their son Egon.
Software - Just entering Admiral and Mrs Rhys-Cupp and their lovely daughter Amy.
Rosie - Prithee all abase y'selves before Mr and Mrs Bennettlookatthelengthofthatticketqueue and their son Gordon. (trad.)
Phil - From North of the border come Mr & Mrs Cutta Cup with their sone Cal
Dandalf - And here they come, weaving through the gates with a swish, that popular Neskiing couple, Al & Pi.
Phil - From Spain, Mr & Mrs Hundred-Metres are here, and a short dash away is their son Juan driving their 4 x 4
Irouléguy - And behind them that popular couple from the world of televised sport, Mr and Mrs Cingfromwarwick and their son Ray.
Software - Make way for Mr & Mrs National and their Gran.
irach - Here comes Mrs. Tuckyderby with her husband Ken and Mr. Te with his lovely wife Kara; here's Mr. and Mrs. Wando who've brought along their little tyke, accompanied by Mrs. Ido and her husband Ike.
Phil - [irach] Couldn't Ken Do come, or Solly "The Jew" Jitsu?
Dandalf - And here we have Mr. Larts his wife Martia, accompanied by their daughter Pauline who came by Tram.
plump - Please welcome Mr & Mrs Deeanappleizfivehundred and their son Ian
Phil - Please be upstanding for Mr & Mrs Manteetee and their biker daughter Isla
Dandalf - A big hand for the Raleigh brothers, Monty and Carlo.
Software - Please welcome Mr and Mrs Mulerwan and their quadruplets, known as the Four.
plump - Please welcome Mr & Mrs Sh and their son Lou and his friend Bob Slay
irach - Please give a rousing welcome to Mrs. Atta and her husband Reg and Mr. Ving who's accompanied by his lady Di; look- here's Mr. Vault with his fiancee from Wroclaw- (she's a Pole), and Mr. Xing with his wife Bo.
Phil - From the International Olympic Committee, please welcome from Spain, Senor Slipofthefingerandthewrongsoddingcitygetstheolympics and his button-pushing pal, Juan
irach - Here comes Mrs. Mostlost-DeMatch with her husband Al, followed by Mrs. Tplace and her husband N. Lars; Oh! and here come Miss Elle Bow and her fiance T. Ennis.
penelope - Are we fed up of the continual party circuit yet? Is it time for a new game?
rab - It would seem so - since it's been a week since you posed that question: Mornington Crescent.
Audience - *shouts, screams generally goes wild for rab*
This is the end of the line. There is no more.