Just as it says on the tin. What happens in the game may be debated in the game: perhaps it'll be a conversation, perhaps a word-limited reprise of various games we play, or whatever.
Expose all
CdM - We could bet on who counts wrong first.
Kim - Well, it won't be me, that's for sure.
Software - Has anyone written formal rules for this game?
snorgle - No, for rules are a form of enslavement!
CdM - I think we need a ruling on contractions.
Tuj - I'd say they're one word. What about abbreviations?
Raak -
Endless disputing,
Legalisms abounding;
Eight words - so simple!
Knobbly - What a concise, elegant and poetic summing up.
Darren - I think abbreviations are fine, but not contractions.
Irouléguy - Is an abbreviation precisely one word, or less?
rab - As resident pedant, I say unto you "fewer".
Darren - So, we count abbreviations as half a word?
Raak - These are not the robots you are seeking.
Rosie - Thank God for that; makes me feel old.
Software - You are only as old as you feel.
Mae West - Or as old as the man you feel.
Lib - Eight words is easy. Five is more tricky.
Raak - Five words makes one thought. Eight allows two.
Darren - Five allow two! Perhaps more! (How many more?)
Chalky - Gathering thoughts in eight words requires considerable focus.
Raak - Mathematics! Scientifiction! Sufism! Mornington Crescent! My head explodes!
Software - This is all too philosophical for average MC-ers.
Kim - How would you describe the "average" Crescenter, then?
snorgle - Me - five foot six, brown hair, green eyes.
Darren - Is that average? I'm taller with brown eyes.
rab - "Average" and "typical" are rarely, if ever, synonymous.
Chalky - I'm like snorgle only I have blue eyes.
Chalky - That simulpost made nonsense out of my entry.
snorgle - Should the number of consecutive posts be limited?
CdM - I think that a strong case can be
CdM - made for limiting the number of consecutive postings
CdM - by a single player, and although I could
CdM - make out a detailed and reasoned argument, I
CdM - think the point is best made by example.
Software - So will you give us an example then?
Rosie - We must reassemble Raak's head, all of us.
Tuj - But he never told us his eye colour!
snorgle - I suggest we use both blue and brown.
Darren - I still have a photo of him somewhere.
Rosie - His original eyes must be somewhere around, surely?
Darren - I found the photo. Raak has brown eyes.
Knobbly - I do to. Not sure if that's relevant.
Rosie - I've found his brain. It'll need a reboot.
CdM - Here is a boot that you can use.
Darren - Could we use Knobbly's eyes in Raak's sockets?
Raak - Where was my head before I was born?
Knobbly - I'm not sure that I like Raak's idea.
Rosie - I think Knobbly meant to say "Darren's idea".
Software - One asks where is all this leading to?
Raak - The raindrop is extinguished on reaching the ocean.
Inkspot - Only to be evaporated again the following Tuesday.
snorgle - While Tuesdays themselves are reborn every single week.
Darren - Change the subject before someone quotes Rod Stewart.
Raak - What is the sound of one hand clapping?
Kim - Game suggestion: quotable quotes in exactly eight words.
Kim - Extended, truncated or paraphrased as necessary to fit.
Robin - I feel the need, the need for speed.
Kim - To be or not: that is the question.
Inkspot - When the apple does fall the worm will fly.
Raak - Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Nine!
Raak - The bough grows as the twig is bent.
Rosie - Silk purse from a sow's ear? You're joking.
Kim - The proper study of mankind is man, dude.
Software - Many hands can easily form a trade union.
Kim - Name's Ozymandias, Uber-rex: regardez these, dudes and despair.
Darren - Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies, banana.
Raak - Everyone agrees a wealthy bachelor needs a wife.
Darren - Ask not for whom the bell tolls (you).
Inkspot - Told you before how to peel an orange.
Knobbly` - Never say 'I doubt that will ever happen!'
Tuj - Bird in hand equals two in the bush.
Kim - Best to get it done sharpish, as t'were.
Raak - Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
Raak - Red rings, sneezing, falling down dead? Probably plague.
Inkspot - Curse your house one thousand eye of bat.
Kim - She sells shells on the shore, I'm sure.
Kim - Rice, treacle, mix, pop! Walk, drink, spend, pop!
Knobbly - A stitch in time saves eight or so.
Irouléguy - The force, Pike, use the force. Stupid boy!
penelope - Jack and Jill had a climbing accident, sadly
Tuj - Humpty Dumpty fell from a wall; royally irreparable.
Inkspot - Simple Simon says want it, want it NOW.
Software - Little Bo Peep is a proper air head.
Tuj - York's Grand Old Duke tested various men/hill formations.
Darren - Sorry, no way is "men/hill" one word.
Raak - Fictitiouscompounding both/and unspiritful, ungood. Suggest "military". Disobfuscationalise octologality.
Chalky - When in doubt - KISS - Keep It Simple Stupid!
Inkspot - Dr. Who eats three shredded Klingons for breakfast.
Underground Ernie - The Rain in Spain falls wherever it wants!
Rosie - Twinkle twinkle little star. Bugger, it's an aeroplane.
Software - Second favorite each way four thirty Sandown Park
Robin - Houston, Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed.
Tuj - When in doubt, blush. And pay more attention.
Knobbly - If at first you don't succeed, give up.
Darren - Looks like everyone has given up since Saturday.
Rosie - All games go very quiet at the weekend. Never call me controversial.
Software - Perhaps it is the heat making everyone lethargic
penelope - More likely they have better things to do.
Phil - Now that my holiday is over, I don't.
Juxtapose - Been away for a while. How is everyone?
Uncle Korky - This game would scare the arse off Rincewind.
Rosie - I can scarcely imagine someone without an arse.
Software - Some people can make an arse of themselves.
Inkspot - I have a strange feeling that somehow it
Tuj - Well? Please do not leave us in suspense.
Rosie - Perhaps Inkspot has fainted in the extreme heat.
Darren - Or been struck by lightning. Anyone else storming?
Knobbly - No, but a VERY loud aeroplane passed earlier.
Software - We had thunder and lightnng but no rain.
Inkspot - We had rain showers but still no snow.
Rosie - Be grateful for small mercies, I always say.
Raak - Mark my words, we'll pay for all this.
Darren - By the word, you mean? Words are cheap.
penelope - Some, ten a penny. Two big ones for a pound.
Kim - Words don't come easy (to me, that is).
Irouléguy - You just have to say what you feel.
Rosie - There are times when this is highly inadvisable.
Chalky - Certain feelings, if vocalised, could promote considerable consternation.
[Last post - 63 letters - is this a record?]
Software - Substantial endeavour necessary for outmanoeuvring carefully deliberated submissions. [Chalky] the gauntlet is down :)
Chalky - Ah, but my sentence was natural and uncontrived.
[Software] AND your italicised comment breaks the rules
Raak - Is this as short as it can be?
Rosie - No. I am to go to a do.
Knobbly - Is it a bird? Is it a 'plane?
Chalky - Perhaps using two sentences is a bit cheaty?
Chalky - I am a she and you a he.
Is that as short as it can be?
Raak - No no no no no no no no!
Tuj - [Chalky] That reads like a brief, succinct poem.
Knobbly - I don't see why; plenty have gone unchallenged.
Darren - Two sentences are acceptable. Only word count matters.
Rosie - I go as I am, or do I?
Tuj - I am who I am who I am.
Knobbly - There's a bright golden haze on the meadow.
Rosie - That sounds as if they are burning stubble.
nights - A smoking internet cafe - what a good idea.
Phil - F U N E X? S V F X
(There are nine letters, but only eight words)
[With acknowledgments to the Two Ronnies, of course]
Raak - It's actually much older than the Two Ronnies.
Darren - Most of their material was older than them.
Software - Anyway, did we all have a good weekend?
penelope - It was blasted curtains for me this weekend
Raak - [pen] How's that, did a bomb go off?
penelope - Looked like it, bit messy at my gaff
nights - Another late one here, got in at 7.
Software - Seven in the Morning or in the evening?
Chalky - Shall we wait until nights decides to reply?
Raak - The moving finger writes, and having writ departs.
nights - Oh, seven the following morning. I WAS tired.
Tuj - This sentence just about stretches to eight words.
Rosie - This, though has only five. Will that do?
Software - Certainly not. You must find another three more.
Kim - I'll lend you a three word sentence, Rosie.
penelope - I can manage eight. Three is more tricky.
Knobbly - Comedians suggest the longest sentence is 'I do'.
penelope - Poets reckon the happiest poem is 'Pay Day'
Darren - In that case, the unhappiest must be "mayday."
nights - Anyone know how I will finish my dissertation?
penelope - Keep working at it until it is done?
Raak - The sage does nothing, yet leaves nothing undone.
Raak - The sage writes nothing, yet leaves nothing unwritten.
Raak - He teaches nothing, yet students seek him out.
Raak - Perhaps I should write "The Tao of Bullshit".
Robin - The moving finger writes and, having writ, continues.
Rosie - Thank you, Kim. I shall use it wisely.
penelope - If only I hadn't wasted my three-worder.
Knobbly - Just out of interest, why was eight chosen?
Tuj - I like eight. (That is my three-worder.)
Rosie - Kim has some spare three-word sentences, penelope.
Tuj - Eight seems to be a good length, no?
Software - Isn't eight the lucky number of the Chinese?
Phil - One over the eight could well indicate drunkenness.
penelope - 'Pissed as 'owt'. Drunkeness expressed in three words.
Rosie - Sobriety, on the other hand, needs lengthier expression.
Tuj - Or a shorter one: "Not drunk" would suffice.
Knobbly - Friends, Romans, countrymen; lend me your aural orifices.
nights - You're all probably right about my dissertation, though.
Rosie - This evening the setting moon looked very red.
Software - That only happens once in a blue moon.
Rosie - A great song, especially The Marcel's sixties version.
Kim - Not to mention the seventies version by Showaddywaddy.
Knobbly - Wasn't Showaddywaddy's song "Under The Moon Of Love"?
Software - True, but Showaddywaddy also sung Elvis's 'Blue Moon'.
Kim - They never once had a number one hit.
penelope - I saw them play live at Pebble Mill
Phil - My mum once dated a Pebble Mill presenter.
Phil - Good old Google! His name was Bob Langley
Tuj - One two three four etc etc etc... eight.
Kim - They're coming to take me away, ha ha!
Phil - One, two, miss a few, ninety-nine, one hundred.
Darren - Can someone adjudicate on Phil's hundred minus one?
Kim - Speaking personally, I think that he is correct.
Raak - This line self-identifies as being eight words long.
Software - Not if it is blind to the hyphen.
Tuj - This sentence says that it has eight words.
Phil - Darren, I thought my hyphenation might provoke discussion.
CdM - This defines largest number expressible in eight words.
Tuj - Ninety billion billion billion is a large number.
penelope - Ninety nine billion billion billion billion is bigger
Phil - In eight words can you really reach infinity?
Raak - One more than the number that CdM defined.
CdM - I knew someone (probably Raak!) would say that.
nights - Isn't it just a lovely day, though? Marvellous.
Rosie - The tangent of pi over two is infinity.
Knobbly - Who knew algebra could be so much fun?
Software - n to the power of zero is one
Knobbly - I often ended up with x equals x
Knobbly - Which is almost certainly true but ultimately unhelpful.
Knobbly - Apologies for double posting... apologies for triple posting.
Tuj - [Knobbly] Stop right there! Don't worry about it.
penelope - I'd worry about it if I were you
nights - Goodness gracious me, the days are just packed.
Rosie - Why pack days? All countries now have days.
penelope - I always take an English Sunday with me
Phil - English Sundays? Yuk! Everyone seems to go shopping.
Rosie - Yes, this demonstrates a great paucity of imagination.
Irouléguy - There's a city called Pau in southwestern France.
nights - There's a city called Nizhny Novgorod in Russia.
Rosie - Is the River Po nominally an open sewer?
nights - Nominally yes, same way as with the Neva.
Phil - There is a house in New Orleans, apparently.
penelope - It's not called The Rising Sun, is it?
Raak - The sun does not rise, the horizon falls.
Inkspot - There's a dull and boring sky over Swindon.
Software - Swindon is dull and boring with any sky
Raak - Ohhh, dull and boring Swindon's dull and boring,
Raak - Think I'll cut my throat, no reason why.
penelope - Right to left, or left to right, Raak?
Phil - Or Swindonwards (if that really is a word)?
Rosie - They built about five thousand steam engines there.
penelope - Then turned the foundry into a shopping complex.
Raak - Got dem cuttin'-me-own-throat Swindon blues.
Rosie - Is that a routine twelve-bar in F?
Software - Their football team leaves much to be desired.
Tuj - They have won three out of three games.
Phil - I know someone with a Swindon Town tattoo!
Rosie - As a conversation stopper, that takes the biscuit.
penelope - Woah yeah got dem inked up Swindon blues
Botherer - I went round the magic roundabout in Swindon.
penelope - There's a similarly loony one in Hemel Hempstead
nights - But those in Telford really are the worst.
Software - Roundabouts with traffic lights are definitely the worst.
penelope - Swindon has its fair share of those too.
Botherer - There's nowhere quite like Milton Keynes for roundabouts.
nights - I like the ones with lights - they're easier.
Knobbly - I like small roundabouts you can see across.
Phil - The Magic Roundabout had an empty seat. Whose?
Rosie - Could be Dougal. He's gone for his tea.
Software - The Magic Roundabout doesn't yet have traffic lights.
nights - Dougal was definitely gone for something or other.
Knobbly - Have you seen any magic round about here?
nights - I think I saw some in the fridge.
Tuj - My fridge is not a time travel machine.
Rosie - Just as well - the Ice Age is past.
Software - The weather is getting me down right now.
Phil - We get weather every day - rise above it.
Rosie - But that would take you into the stratosphere.
Software - I'd find the air too thin up there.
Tuj - That is what they want you to think.
Rosie - In this case, for once, they are right.
Phil - Back down to earth with a bump then.
Rosie - That would be some bump, and possibly fatal.
penelope - OK then, just kill off some old games
Raak - Shall we begin with this one?...
Tuj - [Raak] I think you'll find that's only six.
nights - I arrived home yesterday. Heathrow's still no better.
Rosie - No, I certainly wouldn't want to live there.
Tuj - I'm not sure they would let you either.
Software - Gatwick is just as bad, so they say.
Raak - [Tuj] Should I have said the final words?
Tuj - Don't know - looks like we're talking about airports.
Kim - I've been on holiday, but I'm back now.
Tuj - Go anywhere nice? Go through any nice airports?
Kim - Switzerland, to stay with the in-laws. London City.
Software - My ex-in-laws live in Birmingham; not so exotic.
penelope - I don't have in-laws, ex, current or otherwise.
Rosie - I have parents, not ex, current, but otherwise.
Software - Penelope, would you like in-laws or ex-in-laws, best?
penelope - No idea, Software, having no eperience of either.
Knobbly - Current location: University Marine Biology Station - workload high
Rosie - Current location: bedroom. Workload: Nil. Current activity: Amusement. That's more like it.
Tuj - Location: in front of screen. Bored. Bored. Bored.
Tuj - ...that's been summer. Back to uni soon, thankfully.
Software - Penelope, you don't know how lucky you are.
Phil - [Kim] London City Aiport staff are rather dim.
Botherer - [Phil] I think you missed an r out.
penelope - Software, swings and roundabouts, mate. Solitary dotage beckons.
Phil - [Botherer] Eight words spent to tell me that?
Tuj - [Phil] Eight words spent on that reply? [oblig.]
Rosie - Orthographic rigour must be our sine qua non.
Software - Remaining single is much cheaper than divorce, Pen.
Raak - But two can live more cheaply than one.
penelope - And have a lot more fun, right Raak?
Botherer - It's not only married people who have fun.
nights - Certainly, single people can have excellent fun too.
Knobbly - I've been single ever since I was young!
nights - Oddly, I'm not really sure if I'm single.
Rosie - (nights) Ask at your local Citizens' Advice Bureau.
Software - Once married one can never be single again.
Botherer - I am. Once married, now I am divorced.
penelope - But divorced is not the same as single.
Rosie - It is if you've no kids, otherwise not.
Software - Even with no kids it still costs you.
Botherer - Divorced means not married. Single in my book.
oldbloke - Remarried is not single yet may follow divorce
Raak - Whom God hath jointed, can any man reassamble?
Darren - What on earth is "reassamble" supposed to mean?
Kim - Once married, divorced or widowed, never again single.
Rosie - (Darren) Concerning, or about, strolling with a donkey.
Inkspot - So not to do with stools and doctors?
Phil - Could be. It's an anagram of "mabels arse"
Rosie - I shall eat my trombone, "a brass meal".
Botherer - I'm going to go topless, "a braless me"
Darren - Then I must shoot you with "laser beams."
Robin - I "blame Sears", and Roebuck for good measure.
Raak - "Samba reels" are the very latest dancing craze.
Darren - Sailors invented those reels on long "sea rambles."
Phil - Beer soldiers were ordered to "arm bass ale"
Tuj - Not quite topical, but close: "a Blare mess".
Rosie - This used to be a farm, now it's just an "arable mess".
Rosie - Scrap that; too many words. Formerly a farm, now just an "arable mess." Bit pissed tonite.
Rosie - Bobby Darin; knackered gramophone; "A bass La Mer". Must be really pissed.
Rosie - Must regurgitate trombone as copper chloride. Anagram wrong.
Rosie - Penultimate one wrong, too. I'm going to bed.
Irouléguy - "A rebel mass" (one over the eight, Rosie?)
Rosie - Fencing has now introduced bling as "lamé sabres". (Irg) Well, a little too much + tiredness.
Tuj - "Bears' meals": Honey, apparently, trusting Winnie the Pooh.
Rosie - Vincent van Gogh hated his body. ("Blames ears").
blamelewis - Pardon? (Notes lack of apostrophe) Oh, I see!
CdM - Onyx vessels bearing aquamarine sails ply marble seas
oldbloke - Bless a mare, bishop, to win Haydock race
Kim - Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune.
Software - Suddenly we have taken on an astronomical dimension.
Rosie - Speak for yourself, young man. Just eat less.
Chalky - And run around a bit for good measure.
Phil - I ran around a bit. She slapped me.
Software - You should try to keep away from slappers.
Tuj - Or you could just turn the other cheek.
Rosie - Who wants to whack a big bloke's bum?
Phil - Was that question rhetorical, or a personal ad?
Rosie - I am a moderately bummed five foot eight.
Tuj - [Rosie] SWM? GSOH?
Phil - Sleeps with monkeys? Gets sweaty on horseback? Eh?
Rosie - Suburban West Midlander? No. Got Some Obnoxious Habits.
Botherer - Swim? Gosh! It seems for Tuj typos abound.
Tuj - [Botherer] That statement is only tooo treu. [obigl.]
Rosie - It appears I must be sensible for once.
Software - That would be a new departure for you.
Kim - There was a young girl from Port Said
Raak - Who ate nothing but food that was fried
penelope - Thanks very much! The third line is impossible!
Rosie - She is so mendacious - She's no longer gracious (pen) no it ain't :-)
penelope - Only if you're greedy and take two lines!
Software - Pen, you are not trying; no rhyme there.
Kim - Would someone care to submit the last line?
Phil - Not me; I thought "Said" had two syllables.
Rosie - So she'll be bridesmaid but never the bride.
Kim - I think that works. Shall we have another?
penelope - There's a perfectly good limericks game for that!
Chalky - Indeed there is, but not on this server :-(
Software - Why not start a new limerick game, then?
Quendalon - This appears to be an interesting Internet site.
Quendalon - I do hope to enjoy my visit here.
Quendalon - Though I hoped for more actual Mornington Crescent.
Chalky - Welcome Quendolen. MC is rare here, strangely enough.
Rosie - This means that we have only few Scots.
Chalky - Sorry Quendalon - I spelt your name wrong - tsk
penelope - So shall we cancel Mansell and play MC?
Quendalon - But I thought you were already cancelling Mansell?
Quendalon - (And fear not, Chalky; that happens a lot!)
Software - It has been very quiet on here recently.
penelope - We've been waiting to hear if Mansell's coming.
Rosie - Is he one of those vocal ones, then?
Inkspot - There is only on way to find out.
Software - Really? What way would that be then, please?
Rosie - Bug him. He bugs us, so to speak.
Quendalon - I have not heard one word from him.
Inkspot - He's busy on other line will you hold.
Quendalon - I need to choose simpler items in AVMA.
Rosie - Spill the beans here, then - no-one will notice.
Software - Why is there a sticky mess of beans here?
Rosie - They have caught fire due to Global Warming.
Knobbly - I blame El Niño for all our ills.
Rosie - Surely it cannot be blamed for traffic congestion?
Quendalon - We usually assign such blame to City Hall.
Botherer - What about those who live in towns?
Quendalon - Did that sentence have less than eight words?
Phil - It certainly looked like seven words to me.
Quendalon - Then it seems that we are in agreement.
Rosie - I think we should celebrate this transient harmony.
Inkspot - Everybody up on their feet and dance Agadoo.
Software - Really, that is going too far, I think.
Quendalon - For my part, I am unfamiliar with Agadoo.
ImNotJohn - I wish I could say the same thing.
Quendalon - Curious! Might I inquire as to its nature?
Rosie - It's a town in Morocco, according to Mycroft.
Software - I rather think that it is this Agadoo.
penelope - I didn't want to be reminded of that/
Robin - Which is worse, Agadoo or the Birdie Song?
Rosie - Neither song is as bad as "My Way."
Botherer - Doesn't it depend on who the singer is?
Lib - It is particularly bad when I sing it.
Rosie - That is no disgrace, I can assure you.
Tom P - So sing the quick brown fox et cetera.
penelope - How does that particular one go, Tom P?
Software - What about Jo Dolce 'Shut Uppa Your Face'?
Rosie - Outscores "Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polkadot Bikini".
Chalky - Polkadot? One word? Taking the poetic mickey methinks :-)
penelope - I'm still cross about my two parking tickets :o(
Software - Awe, tell us all about it, please pen.
penelope - My own stupid fault really, but it's expensive.
Quendalon - How expensive are parking tickets where you live?
penelope - £50 in Notting Hill, but £40 in Ealing
Software - Ealing would seem a bargain. It's £60 here.
penelope - I want parking tickets from somewhere more glamorous
Rosie - I'm afraid I can only offer you Warlingham.
Software - If you think Jersey is glamorous, pay mine!
Botherer - I was in Jersey only seven weeks ago.
Rosie - I was in pullover only seven minutes ago.
Quendalon - I watched the Torchwood trailer seven seconds ago.
Tuj - I'll be done typing in seven seconds' time.
penelope - That's less than a second per typed word!
Tuj - Does depend where you start timing from though.
Quendalon - Some of us type more quickly than others!
Software - The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy
Rosie - morniverser, who really ought not post an unfinished
Tuj - sentence when there are so many just waiting
nights - Waiting for what? The bus will be late.
Quendalon - Does anyone get reliable bus service these days?
Rosie - I'm sure the Germans do, being so efficient.
ImNotJohn - Wo ist mein bus, er ist nicht gekommen.
Rosie - Maybe my assertion lacks in situ experimental verification.
Software - Why are we discussing busses at this time?
Knobbly - Is "busses" the correct spelling? It looks wrong.
ImNotJohn - If you aren't sure, then say "kisses" instead.
Rosie - It's buses. I shall be subject to abuses.
Software - Either buses or busses according to my dictionary.
Darren - Don't be silly. Everybody knows it is "bi."
penelope - I never heard double deckers called 'Bi' before.
ImNotJohn - Unless they like a bit of motorem bum
Rosie - That should be " . . . bit motoris bi". (Genitive case).
Quendalon - Does "Aquitaine" actually rhyme with the word "queen"?
Rosie - No, but Software's French is good, unless pissed.
Software - One decided to invoke plummy British Royal pronunciation.
Rosie - I do not find this explanation wholly convincing.
Software - How about: "...France and England queen she became"?
Chalky - Better - but does 'became' actually rhyme with 'Aquitaine' :-)
Rosie - Methane rhymes with Aquitaine. It's a gas, though.
penelope - Methane, ethane, propane, butane - they're all rhyming gases.
penelope - Shall we continue where we left off, chaps?
Tuj - How many more rhyming gasses can you supply?
Rosie - Fluorine, chlorine, phosphine, arsine, acetylene, ethylene, propylene, allene. You shouldn't have asked. :-)
Quendalon - Can you name eight gases rhyming with "oxygen"?
Tuj - [Rosie] Why not? I'm beguiled and delighted. Thanks.
Software - I think naming gasses is far too elementary.
Tuj - One only comes up with such puns periodically.
Phil - I am such a Francophile; I say "a-kee-ten".
Phil - Actually, I think "a-kee-ten", but say "a-kwee-tain" aloud.
Rosie - I'm such a chemist I say "A ketone".
Rosie - (Quendalon) Hydrogen, nitrogen, cyanogen is all there are.
Software - I wonder if there were any Aquitainaise chemists?
Rosie - Yes, they stick dipropylene glycol in the wines. Allegedly.
Darren - But surely Rosie's last post contains nine words?
Chalky - That was a mightily bold statement young Darren.
Tuj - If Rosie's wasn't nine then this contains nought.
Tuj - Or does it have to be italicised also?
Rosie - Seems I've caused a bit of a shemozzle.
Software - Can we have a ruling on italics usage?
Darren - Perhaps we need a ruling on fonts too?
Chalky - And let's not forget coloured words as well.
Rosie - How long did that take you to type?
Quendalon - I'm not sure how that might be relevant.
Tuj - Who are people appealing to for rulings though?
Quendalon - I am always glad to issue a ruling.
Humphrey Littleton - What? Did somebody ask me something just then?
Chalky - You have spelt your own name wrong. Imposter!
Darren - That guy never claimed he was Humphrey Lyttelton.
Chalky - The poster also never claimed he was male.
Rosie - Furthermore, I have never claimed I am female.
Darren - Plenty of other people have done so, though.
Software - Many people think that Chalky is a man.
Rosie - Some must think you're just ones and noughts.
Raak - Wired ran a challenge. Can we match it?
Rosie - Yes. Needs a separate game. Perhaps eight words?
nights - I'm rather bored, who's up for some ping-pong?
Tuj - *grabs bat, throws ball up... down, serves* ping!
Rosie - Pong! This homophone deserves greater exploitation, I feel.
Software - Ping also has certain atributes for Unix® enthusiasts.
Tuj - Pong was a game. Before my time alas.
Darren - I feel sure you must have experienced pongs.
Rosie - As an industrial chemist I experienced them professionally.
penelope - As an effluent analyst, I experienced some too.
Rosie - You are clearly a woman of many parts.
penelope - Rosie, the things I did you wouldn't believe
Software - Maybe you could try to test our credulity.
Knobbly - Ping, Pang and Pong are characters in Turandot.
nights - So, guess who got laid last night then?
Knobbly - How many guesses are we allowed to have?
Rosie - nights is merely telling us he's a carpet.
Kim - People have told me that all my life.
Rosie - I shouldn't stand for that. Trip them up.
Darren - Glad we resisted jokes about "shag" and "piles."
Rosie - We have done so far. Melvyns and Chalfonts.
penelope - I'm off to Paris today. See you Sunday.
Chalky - 'Ave a wondairful 'oleeday chère jhoosteen. À bientôt.
Software - Pen, I hope that you aren't going alone.
Rosie - Still on the pull at your age? Disgraceful!
Darren - I think Rosie has started talking to himself.
Rosie - "Started", he witters. So little does he know.
Inkspot - He knows you know that I know now.
Rosie - I am from Warlingham, Surrey. I know nothing.
Software - But even in Warlingham, Surrey, knowledge is power.
Rosie - That's why SEEboard delivers encyclopaedias but not electricity.
Darren - I taught a battery to play Trivial Pursuit.
Software - And now I bet you win every time, Darren.
penelope - I've returned from Paris with a stinking cold :o(
Rosie - Did you have to pay duty on it?
penelope - They could take half of it with pleasure
Darren - ...once they arrested you for carrying illegal immigrants.
Software - Je pense que vous avez un rhume puant.
Rosie - Je veux vous montrer ma compétence en français.
penelope - What's the bloody French for 'Dead Ended Conversation'?
Rosie - Conversation tout inutile. Shall we now move on?
Tuj - Yes, let's. I have never known any French.
Irouléguy - Podemos hablar en Españnol, si lo quieren ustedes
Chalky - Now stop showing off and speak some English :-)
Software - Enough linguistics. The rain has cleared over here.
penelope - That's because it has blown over this way
Rosie - There's no peace for the wicked of Rickmansworth.
Software - Now it is blowing a gale over here.
Rosie - I doubt Admiral Beaufort would call it that.
Tuj - I doubt Kenneth Branagh would call it that.
penelope - Where does Kenneth Branagh come in on this?
Tuj - I just mentioned him. I did that indeed.
Rosie - But is he an experienced marine meteorological observer?
Tuj - Does that matter though? Julian Clary wouldn't either.
Software - What has camping got to do with meteorology?
Irouléguy - Humans are the only species who go camping
Lib - I thought bears were particularly good at camping.
Tuj - They defecate in woods but live in cities.
Rosie - A big one circles the pole every night.
penelope - A bit like a pole dancer then, Rosie?
Rosie - The women in this place are agreeably bawdy.
Lib - Trying to pole-dance, but not been to Poland
Rosie - Trying to shop, but not been to Iceland.
Inkspot - No self will today, bought bar of chocolate.
Rosie - No Will Self either, whom I rather like.
penelope - My new car is bloody full of water.
Software - Have you driven it off of a bridge?
penelope - No, I think the sunroof has a leak.
Tuj - Did your penultimate post originally say "bloody water"?
Kiely - How do you zap the commercials with TiVo
Kiely - Daniel Kiviat is here!
Kiely - Tuj, Can you speak French?
Kiely - Who is Tuj?
Kiely - Agatha Christie is constipated!
Kiely - Did you hear about George Bush?
penelope - [Kiely] Please re-submit your posts with more words
Rosie - That is rather ladylike but it may work.
Software - Highly restrained,Pen, in my own humble opinion.
Darren - Why do people think this is live chat?
Rosie - coz there saddos who nevr go out yeah
Lib - Well we are alive and chatting, so it is.
Software - Did I detect an extra word just then?
Lib - Yes, that is true. I cannot count. Bollocks.
CdM - [Insert joke about doctor who cannot count bollocks.]
penelope - Attention Lib: "Testes, testes. One, Two, One, Two."
Lib - Counting was not part of my medical degree.
Lib - Nor ENT, dermatology, anatomy. I make it up.
Rosie - You should have some ability at jazz, then.
Lib - Jazz, perhaps, but life is random and chaotic!
Rosie - I hope that's not true of medical procedures.
Lib - I have an exam tomorrow and feel very sick.
Software - That is quite obvious from your extra word.
Lib - Oh, sigh. Not again. Life is tough.
Lib - I find averaging makes everything much much better.
Rosie - We all hope you pass with flying colours.
Darren - Lib is still cheating, doubling up for sixteen.
Software - So, Lib, was all the stress worth it?
Lib - It was horrible. Results out in a week.
Rosie - My fingers are crossed, and it's not arthritis.
Tuj - I'm bored. What shall we all do now?
Rosie - We could all simultaneously shout "Points mean prizes!".
Lib - Points out that nobody has mentioned Christmas yet.
Tuj - Points mean prizes! Points mean prizes! Join in!!
penelope - The first person to mention Christmas here loses.
Raak - Is it ok to mention the Holiday Season?
Software - We haven't put the office decorations up yet.
Rosie - Don't forget to do a Risk Assessment first.
Lib - Exam results are out. I failed. Sigh. Weep.
penelope - Oh that's too bad Lib. A bad fail?
Software - Sorry pen. However I passed. I'm now MEng.
Software - Obviously I meant commiserations to Lib not pen. :-0
penelope - Congrats, Softers. Was that recently? So what now?
Lib - No marks. Doing again April. Well done Softy!
Software - Thanks Lib and pen. What next? Nothing really.
Rosie - There's an unusually bright object in the sky.
penelope - I've seen it too. The temperature dropped today.
Software - We has a touch of frost overnight here.
Rosie - That's no excuse for yokel-like grammatical infelicities.
Lib - Have you caught my non counting bug, Rosie?
Rosie - I think hyphenated words should count as two.
Software - I'm away for Christmas; therefore may not post.
Software - Merry Christmas to all; back for New Year.
Lib - I'm working Christmas nights so may post lots.
penelope - I'm fixing wireless for mummy, can I post?
Rosie - She'll be able to hear the Light Programme.
Puckoon - But the 'Light Programme' no longer exists, Rosie.
Rosie - Nor the word "wireless" as of old. Geddit?
penelope - It only worked for twenty minutes, f*ck it.
Rosie - (pen) No, you f*ck it; I'll hold it.
Software - I'm back. When's my turn to f*ck it?
Inkspot - Done mine, now when do I get paid?
Software - It has gone very quiet here this year.
penelope - I have just booked myself a September holiday :o)
Rosie - Something worthy, such as examining extinct Icelandic volcanoes?
Phil - I've booked a holiday in Cathar castle country
penelope - No, it's haymaking in Hertfordshire, for four days.
Rosie - (pen) That sounds fun, whether literal or metaphorical.
Software - I'm going to Salford to visit my son.
Lib - [Softers] Wave at Stockport. I'll wave back, probably.
Rosie - Lib IS Stockport, a town with a personality.
Lib - Stockport certainly lacks personality, I have stolen it.
Software - I'll wave at Stockport, should I recongize it.
Rosie - It'll say "Stockport. Jumelée avec Fontainbleau" ou quelquechose.
Software - En fait, il semble être jumelé avec Béziers
Lib - English now. Today I have bought a car.
Software - Is it an English car or perhaps Japanese?
Rosie - These days the distinction is not always clear.
penelope - Is it that Japanese cars have slitty eyes?
Software - No, it's that they are made in Swindon.
Lib - This one is from Prague. Its a Skoda!
Raak - I discovered that "škoda" is Czech for "damage".
Rosie - A Citroen is no better. It's a lemon.
Software - Skoda cannot be Czech, far too many vowels.
penelope - It's only forty per cent vowelated! VW's zero.
Rosie - Not in Welsh it isn't, indeed to goodness.
penelope - I'll be out of range next week - holiday :)
Lib - You're lucky. Where are you going Pen? Jealous!
Lib - Must have missed her already. That was quick.
Software - Hopefully, she'll tell us all on her return.
penelope - Wild and windy Dorset, a cottage with friends
Rosie - Is it now furnished with the Napoli booty?
penelope - Yep, all motorbikes and nappies. We ate catfood.
Software - Pen? Nappies? We need a better explanation, please.
penelope - They were washed ashore from that stricken ship.
penelope - Is no-one talking here any more? Suit yourself.
Uncle Korky - There ain't nobody here but us chickens, pen.
Software - And us chickens all have the avian flu.
Rosie - Fear not. That is strictly for the birds.
Lib - I've got girl flu, variant of bird flu.
Phil - "Vet is fine!", reads slow news day headline
Rosie - "Vet is bedder zan colt" says German mountaineer.
penelope - So 'man flu' is a completely different disease?
Tuj - Shall I draw you a Venn diagram, pen?
penelope - That would be beyond my small, pink brain
Rosie - You must have plenty of grey matter, though.
penelope - Yes Rosie, but I dye it brunette again.
Rosie - You could highlight the cortex and hypothalamus, surely?
Software - I didn't think L'Oréal was worth that much.
Rosie - That is something of an insult, isn't it?
Rosie - My last remark has killed things stone dead.
Software - Maybe it was something that you said. Eh?
penelope - Anyone seen the Hogarth exhibition at Tate Britain?
Software - Funny that you should mention that. Actually, no.
nights - Привет друзья! Я чуствую что я не умный.
Rosie - Nice one, Cyril, but could you decode it?
nights - No, as it takes fifteen words in English.
Software - Then enter two lines - plus an extra word.
Lib - But that's wrong and breaks the rules, softers.
penelope - There's only one rule; the eight word limit.
Robin - Not a word more, not a word less.
penelope - So no variations on that rule? No exceptions?
Tuj - Game summary (up top) exceeds the word limit.
Lib - Tuj you are being a pedant. Please stop.
Rosie - So, who led the Pedant's Revolt? Which Tyler.
Phil - That is one of my son's favourite jokes.
nights - I promise: no more Russian. It causes argument.
Tuj - [Lib] It was ironic, as I wrote it.
Software - Right, that's settled, now shall we move on?
Rosie - We have all moved on, as politicians say.
Knobbly - I can't think of anything worth saying yet.
Raak - Do you think we'll have a hot summer?
Lib - Hot summer, yes please. I'll be unemployed then.
nights - So will I, however sadly not through choice.
Software - I hope we move office before a hot summer.
Lib - Its not my choice either. Government lottery. Bastards.
Rosie - Have you been sacrificed for the Olympics? Disgraceful.
Lib - I am actually considering volunteering for Olympic sacrifice.
penelope - How do they decide who gets first place?
Rosie - Well, firstly, you have to live in Stratford.
penelope - On Avon (is Shakespeare fatal?) or east London?
Uncle Korky - Shakespeare can be fatal. Watch "Theatre of Blood".
Rosie - (pen) It's the latter. You will be made homeless.
nights - I speak of my impending graduation. With fear.
penelope - [nights] Most people survive graduation ceremonies, don't they?
Rosie - (nights) Do you mean your possible non-graduation? Ruling needed on hyphenated words.
Lib - I like hyphenated words. Small-talk. Short-list. Quad-biking. Any-thing!
Rosie - 1-(3,4-methylenedioxyphenyl)-2-methylaminopropane. You would like that. You'd be ecstatic.
penelope - Ecstatic at the word count or chemical effect?
Raak - I've just discovered virtual drugs in Second Life.
Tuj - [Rosie] A word with a comma in it!!
Kim - I haven't posted a line here in ages.
Rosie - I was "pushing the envelope", pen. It's Ecstasy.
nights - I'm more afraid of what it will mean.
penelope - Mrs Robinson says it'll mean you're The Graduate.
CdM - I want to say one word to you.
Rosie - Why didn't you leave room for it, then?
Software - Nobody can squeeze a word in edgeways here.
penelope - I manage OK, but nine-word cowboys are excluded.
CdM - [Rosie] I presumed you'd know what it was.
Tuj - [CdM] Was the "you" Rosie? I'd assumed penelope.
nights - Friday, everyone! Time to let our hair down?
Software - You assume that we still have some hair.
Knobbly - I still can't think of anything worth saying.
Tuj - [Knobbly] BZZZT! Contradiction! [nights] My hair's too short.
nights - Figure of speech, people! Get with the times.
Rosie - That figure of speech was around aeons ago.
snorgle - Who knows how long an aeon is, though?
Lib - I do. But I'm not going to tell.
Software - We didn't find out how pen's interview went.
penelope - Perfect job, but I think I'm too old.
Software - Surely, pen, that cannot be true, can it?
penelope - I'm older than those who interviewed me (badly).
Software - Were you applying to a young mother's group?
penelope - How patronising! I work in the motor industry.
CdM - [Tuj] "You" was actually nights. This may clarify.
Software - Sorry to offend. It was the age group.
penelope - Age group? I think you're a bit genderist.
Tuj - A bizarre crossbreed would yield Softlope and peneware.
Rosie - There would then remain the question of pronunciation.
Chalky - The trouble is - hasn't pronunciation always been questionable?
Rosie - Peneware means "almost fabricated", like The Spice Girls.
Software - I'm in a hole. Time to stop digging.
Tuj - Softlope could be an Australian rock band, perhaps.
nights - Excited people want to say words to me.
Raak - They all begin "You may already have won..."
Tuj - Surely better than "Where's what you owe us??"
Rosie - Softlope sounds like a wolf in sheep's clothing.
Software - Or a sheep in wolf's clothing, may be?
penelope - BBZZZTTTT-ding!! 'Maybe' is one word, Softers. No buts.
snorgle - But isn't BBZZZTTTT-ding two words in itself, pen?
Projoy - Per chance we need a ruling on archaisms.
penelope - Thought we agreed hyphenated words count as one?
Projoy - But what if they were not all-ways hyphenated?
Raak - The spirit of the rules needs no excuses.
Software - Good point. But let's not be too pedantic.
snorgle - For fun, we could be REALLY pedantic, instead!
Raak - Would that be as opposed to fictitiously pedantic?
penelope - In this game, I am only virtually pedantic.
nights - Happy Charity Guilt Day, everyone UK based!
Rosie - That's the most clunking sentence I've ever read.
Projoy - Yes, but do I look bovvered to you?
nights - Clunk off, I'm a linguist, therefore I'm right. :)
Raak - If two linguists disagreed, which would be right?
Rosie - Are you calling me a linguist? I'm flattered.
Software - That is not really flattery. That is indigestion.
nights - It certainly sounded like it from over here.
Rosie - That can only be explained by anomalous propagation.
penelope - Oh really? So explain it then, clever clogs!
Rosie - I can't - it's anomalous, or possibly very loud.
Software - Can somebody please turn down the volume, then?
Projoy - What sort of volume would you like, then?
Rosie - I'd turn down Wayne Rooney's autobiography without hesitation.
Projoy - But that doesn't really answer the question asked.
Software - Remind me of what the question asked was.
penelope - The first eight-word move in the new place!
Tuj - Indeed! Thanks rab for seemless transitions! Huzzah huzzah!
Rosie - Shurely not an unseemly transition? It works well.
Software - After all the accolades, shall we move on?
Tuj - What topic should we move on to then?
Rosie - I think we could usefully address patio heaters.
Projoy - My patio often remains chilly after using one.
Lib - I find drinking beer helps more than heating.
Raak - [Lib] Was that intended as an added consonant?
moroni - Beer makes me forget what I just uum, err
penelope - Err is right. That was nine words, moroni.
Software - Looks as though Spring has arrived at last.
Tuj - Oh dear. Don't put the mockers on it!
Graham III - There is nothing but fog here in Cambridge
moroni - Must remember to count the vertical single letter
snorgle - Ah, and I thought moroni was an insult!
Tuj - Perhaps moroni would care to explain his/her name.
moroni - Moroni is a mormon angel statue with trumpet
moroni - It is also "moron" followed by letter "i"
moroni - You decide if I am moron or statue
Tuj - Sure you're not the capital city of Comoros?
moroni - No man is an island, except Fred Madagascar
Chalky - *[hmmm - perhaps moroni is an attention seeker person]*
Tuj - [Chalky] Fred Madagascar made me laugh. Newbie, surely.
Rosie - There's Lennox Lewis. Don't laugh - he'll thump you.
Software - Tommy Cooper made me laugh; Tony Blair doesn't.
Phil - Rosie, remember Keith Harris? Not many laughs really.
Tuj - st dogmael made me laugh. Where'd he go?
Rosie - There's David Gower. No man is a peninsula.
moroni - Tim, Graham, Willie, Barry, Humphry made me laugh.
moroni - Newbie to board, fifteen year veteran of MC
Lib - Fifteen years ago I wasn't even a teenager!
penelope - Neither was I, but for a different reason!
Rosie - Come, children! Fifteen years ago is only yesterday.
Lib - Yesterday was Thursday, in my world at least.
Rosie - I really ought to go to bed earlier.
Tuj - A sentiment I voice for myself also [sigh]
Rosie - Sighs don't count, just as size doesn't matter.
penelope - How many points for a pair of pants?
Software - Pants with points in are really very uncomfortable.
Lib - Surely that depends on what activities pleasures you?
Rosie - There you go again. You really are disgraceful.
penelope - A PAIR OF PANTS! That's two heavy breaths.
Lib - [Rosie] I giggle cos mother thinks I'm innocent!
moroni - Flush, swirl, sounds of where game is heading.
penelope - Ladies or gents? Or perhaps both, it seems.
Rosie - We must stop this going down the pan.
Software - We always revert to toilet humour when bored.
Lib - I'm not bored. I'm panicing. Big exam today.
penelope - Deep breath, Lib. Stay calm, and enjoy it! :o)
Software - Good luck, Lib, better luck this time, eh?
moroni - Exam time, what joy, results time, what sorrow.
penelope - That's a bit of a pessimistic attitude, moroni
Raak - Prepare for the worst. Hope for the best.
moroni - An optimist cannot ever be pleasantly surprised, penelope.
Chalky - I think they can - because they're hopeful chaps
Chalky - I mean - why should expectation somehow negate surprise?
penelope - I think I'd call myself a realistic optimist
Software - Is that better than an unrealistic pessimist, then?
Tuj - We went from toilet humour to this quickly!
Rosie - We've all had a crap, and feel good.
snorgle - Let's swiftly move onto a less toilet-based subject!
moroni - Does a hyphenated word count one or two?
snorgle - Personally, I would count it as one. This-though-would-be-a-cheat!
Software - Haven't we had this debate before? Ruling, please?
Graham III - Sorry, I don't have a ruler on me
gil - I have. Hyphenated words always count as one.
Rosie - Let us all take that as definitive. Sorted!
penelope - How about a quick hands-up for the 'not-sures'?
snorgle - Can I put half a hands-up for maybe?
moroni - Is that an absolutely positive definite maybe, snorgle?
CdM - I'm in the not-quite-so-sure-that-this-is-so-cut-and-dried-as-gil-seems-to-think-it-is group, myself. I think.
Rosie - The generally-in-agreement word-perfect linguistically-dual Betws-y-Coed cottage-dwellers say no.
Tuj - [CdM] Why not found the-try-to-take-the-concept-to-a-logical-though-somewhat-absurdist-extreme-or-at-least-to-the-level-to-which-one-can-be-fussed-to-do-in-the-next-minute-or-so-provided-the-attention-span-lasts-and-one-doesn't-get-confused-by-the-lack-of-commas-or-other-such-things-such-as-the-fact-I've-pretty-much-forgotten-where-I-was-ah-yes-the-absurdist-extremes-that's-the-one group? More fun!
Tuj - ...and besides flights of fancy, I'd say no.
moroni - How is the weather today where you are?
snorgle - Sunny with occasional cloud, and really quite warm.
moroni - Forty Nine Degrees Farenheight, chance of snow tonight.
snorgle - Moroni, that's chilly. What country are you in?
Raak - 85°F in my office. Blazing sunshine, central heating.
Lib - Central heating? Fools. Don't you use centigrade yet?
moroni - USA but I am originally from the UK.
Rosie - Even with centigrade central heating is sometimes necessary.
penelope - I prefer to heat with Fahrenheit. It's hotter.
moroni - Kelvin is the hottest, zero is tricky though.
Lib - Absolutely! Absolute zero, easily defined. Tricky to find.
Rosie - Not at all. Google Whitehall. Click on Intelligence.
Lib - Bloody hell! I passed. Very very very happy.
penelope - Hurrah! Fantastic news Lib! Very well done indeed!
Rosie - Don't go and get drunk, Lib. Medically inadvisable.
CdM - Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay!
Software - Congratulations, Lib, we all agree you deserve it.
Lib - Thank you all very much indeed. Appreciated. Ta!
moroni - Well done Lib. Now you can play MC.
penelope - I'll admit I never took the MC test
Lib - I passed, but got stuck in Dollis Hill.
Chalky - Late as always - but ... well done that Lib!
Rosie - I hope there's a job for you, lib.
Software - Sorry that you got stuck in Dollis Hill.
snorgle - It's better than getting stuck in Silent Hill.
penelope - Silent Hill... in the old Mime Crescent game?
Tuj - This game would not work better in mime.
Graham III - I don't know, why don't we try it?
moroni - Mime it is, - - - - -
penelope - Nope, no idea Moroni. What's the nodding for?
moroni - . - + + - + . ,
Knobbly - *Pretends to be shut in an invisible box*
Chalky - [Knobblers] Ah Got it! You're a bent-over person?
Chalky - [Obviously that doesn't apply if the box is tall]
Rosie - (Knobbly) You're Schrödinger's Cat. Are you still there?
Software - If you are, are you dead or alive?
moroni - Maybe we could take a look? Puzzle solved.
Rosie - No, I'm afraid that would be puzzle aborted.
Software - Let's put him in this Klein bottle instead.
moroni - My mobius band seems to go on forever.
Irouléguy - I blame the guitarist - all those endless solos.
Rosie - Lucky you're not a jazz fan. Bass solos.
moroni - Triangle or gong solos are not very entertaining.
Rosie - It depends how long they go on for.
Software - Personally, I do not like maracas solos much.
penelope - Sounds like someone dropping a box of dominoes
Tuj - You can't go wrong with a kazoo solo.
Lib - I'd prefer the swannee whistle please. More dulcet.
Graham III - Not as dulcet as the dulcimer I say.
Rosie - I'd say a harp solo is even dulceter.
Rosie - Dulceter sounds like a rather twee small town.
moroni - It is east of Camberwick Green, near Trumpton.
Software - Pugh, Pugh, Barny McGrew, Cutherbert, Dibble and Grout.
Lib - A little known fact. Lib can play harp.
Rosie - You'll have to bring it to a pilg.
snorgle - Is the harp bigger than a bread bin?
Lib - Smaller than a phonebox, but bigger than breadbin.
I Say, Porter! - Begins with a P? (oops! wrong game)
I Say, Porter! - [Lib] Begins with a P? (oops! wrong game)
moroni - How did you "pluck" the courage to play?
Tuj - [I Say, Porter!] That was a bit close.
Software - A close shave, eh? Many ladies like that.
Rosie - Some, in my experience, prefer the opposite, fortunately.
Lib - Back, sack and crack? Better than close shaving!
Lib - I lie. Men are best in natural form.
penelope - Lib's right. I prefer slightly hairy men too.
Knobbly - I prefer slightly hairy women, come to that.
Lib - Slightly hairy women, like ones with nice beards?
Knobbly - Just on the head, maybe a small moustache.
Rosie - You're not in favour of luxuriant armpits, then?
Raak - I've always thought armpit shaving a strange custom.
Tuj - I wonder if the armpit dreadlock's been invented.
penelope - Wonder no longer. Rest assured, it has. Awesome.
Raak - Does anyone dye their armpit hair as well?
Tuj - This is reaching high levels of the bizarre.
penelope - I should hope so. We're all highly educated.
Rosie - I wonder. How many of us have tattoos?
Tuj - Not me. Doesn't mean you're educated though, surely?
moroni - Tatoos - Moving pictures all year round for partner.
Lib - I have no tattoos. But I am pierced.
I Say, Porter! - Tanni Grey-Thompson has tattooed right big toe
Phil - My lower lip is stretched like Sting's mate's
penelope - Phil, you big pouter! Do you dribble much?
Phil - I lied. My body has no deliberate modifications.
Software - Piercings? Tattoos? Are we a bunch of fetishists?
Rosie - My well-being depends on plastic in two forms.
Software - That would be credit and debit one assumes.
Rosie - Ha! No! Plastic lenses and acrylic upper denture.
Software - Sadly, that is the 'joy' of getting old.
Lib - Do any of you lovely crescenters have tattoos?
Software - Not I. To me they are simply repulsive.
moroni - No, not me. I never saw a need.
Rosie - (Lib) I asked that only a few moves back.
Rosie - BUM'OLES - that's nine. Replace a few with thirteen.
penelope - I prefer the chiaroscuro of wrinkles to tattoos.
Software - And unlike tattoos, they don't fade over time.
Software - Will Lib reveal where she has been pierced?
Lib - Sorry Rosie. I expected to be asked. Its....
Tuj - Interesting lack of apostrophe. Look forward to continuation.
Lib - I find no apostrophes is better than wrong!
Software - Such tantalizing silence, Lib. We can only imagine.
Tuj - [Softers] I've never been tantalised by punctuation... oh.
Rosie - Let's talk about gas stoves. They're very interesting.
moroni - We have a gas stove, it is nice.
Software - Personally, I hate gas. Our stove is electric.
Lib - Its a nipple bar. I cook on gas.
Rosie - I preferred coal gas. Very short intense flame.
Phil - A nipple bar sounds fun. Two pints please.
Raak - Try searching Google Images for "nipple bar". Ouch!
CdM - I searched and found this picture. Ouch indeed.
Lib - A picture makes up for a thousand words!
Chalky - Really? Then write a thousand words about it!
Projoy - Does that mean CdM has broken the rules?
Software - Rules are made to be broken, it's said.
moroni - CdM has made 125 moves, not broken rules.
Tuj - So 1/125 of a picture equals one move?
Rosie - And 1/125 of a second gives one picture.
Software - That appears to be high definition stuff indeed!
penelope - Is it time for another cup of coffee?
Raak - It's always time for another cup of coffee.
Rosie - In my youth, coffee was posh. Expensive, too.
Raak - And no-one in Britain could make it properly.
moroni - Make it in a proper copper coffee pot.
Software - I like good coffee and good tea too.
Lib - I have a massive hangover. Had exams yesterday.
penelope - I'm newly freelancing. That means no work yet. :o(
Lib - Pen I've got work. Cleaning and Ironing ok?
penelope - Lib, sounds fine to me. I love ironing.
Lib - But pen, you're worth far more than that!
Lib - Hope work appears soon! Keep going, you're ace!
I Say, Porter! - Have ironing. Can send from Belgium DHL...
I Say, Porter! - How did that become seven words? Add 'by'.
CdM - [Lib] She didn't tell you what she charges
penelope - It'd get creased again when I return it!
I Say, Porter! - Drop it off on your way to Holland!
moroni - Put "fragile" on the packet, it may survive.
penelope - Success! I'm doing PR for a Choral Society!
Lib - Excellent. Hurrah. Well done pen. Good luck too.
CdM - OK, folks. Eight word Choral Society slogans. Go!
Rosie - Carshalton Beeches Ladies' Choir. We're Singers not Mingers.
Software - Want a song? With us you're never wrong!
penelope - No competition. I think that takes the biscuit.
Phil - Who needs a blocked nose? We've got Tunes!
CdM - Mostly in Tune Since 1965 (Except the Tenors)
I Say, Porter! - No Accuse Teno's Of Singin' Wrong: It Debases
Projoy - All Our Bass Are Belong To You, Folks
Rosie - Hear our choir - we can Handel The Messiah.
I Say, Porter! - You practice in the bath? Take more baths.
moroni - She sings sweet songs softly so she says.
Software - Softly swishing soap suds she sits silently shampooing.
Projoy - That one would definitely encourage me to attend!
penelope - You mean there are no choral financial incentives?
penelope - I was at the Epsom Derby today. Heaving.
Rosie - Heaving? You ought not to drink so much.
Software - Penelope, were you wearing a silly stylish elaborate hat?
penelope - No, in the free bit with the hoi-polloi
moroni - How did the hoi-polloi taste? Too spicy again!
penelope - Tried not to taste them. Kept my distance.
Phil - The "the" in "the hoi polloi" is redundant.
Software - Some may say the hoi polloi are redundant.
penelope - By looks of them, a lot were.
Rosie - Phil is right. Standards must be kept up.
moroni - Penelope used only seven words. Standards are falling.
penelope - The 'redundant' was redundant. I left it out.
Rosie - That's neat, pen, but I am not convinced.
Phil - Alternatively, one could say "the polloi", I suppose.
I Say, Porter! - I have a parrot that says, "pretty polloi"
penelope - Is your parrot from Dudley, I Say, Porter!?
moroni - I hope it is not an ex parrot.
Rosie - No, it's an expatriate, living in Greece, obviously.
Software - Isn't living in grease a messy business, Rosie?
Raak - Better than living in a Saturday night fever.
penelope - Made lemon cake this morning, for afternoon tea.
Software - What will you eat for supper then, pen?
penelope - No idea. Fish finger sandwich, mayonnaise, ketchup maybe?
Software - I hope you defrost the fish fingers first.
moroni - They lose their crunch when you defrost them.
friendly_lunatic - yes and that is sad. crunch is best.
CdM - There's a lunatic in here! Looks friendly, though.
penelope - They're the ones you have to watch carefully.
Rosie - Yes, he said "crunch". That sounds rather violent.
Software - I like Crunchy bars straight from the fridge.
Rosie - That practice denuded me of half my teeth.
moroni - "Yorkies" are like concrete when they are cold.
I Say, Porter! - I hate the pathetic little nippy yappy bastards.
Rosie - I tried putting golden syrup in the freezer.
Software - ISP, try putting them in the freezer too.
moroni - Did you succeed Rosie or was it failure?
Rosie - How can I succeed Rosie. I am Rosie.
Projoy - I guess you could succeed at being Rosie.
Rosie - I'm giving it a go. Few others would.
I Say, Porter! - I would, but I can't play the trombone.
I Say, Porter! - [everyone] Please, no 'neither can Rosie' gags. Thanks.
Rosie - Actually, I'm a considerably better pianist than trombonist.
moroni - My music teacher asked me to stop playing.
Knobbly - You can't tuck a 'cello under your chin.
Rosie - Nor a piano. But you wear a sousaphone.
Software - I can't actually play any instrument at all.
Knobbly - I'm not very good, but I enjoy trying.
Knobbly - That could apply to many of my activities.
moroni - To parachute you must be good every time.
Software - Not necessarily if you are a lucky bastard.
Chalky - I didn't click on that link. Dunno why.
Rosie - There is a surreal quality in that remark.
Kim - [Software] His father said he'd "bounce back". Nice.
Botherer - I think you're confusing this with bungee jumping.
penelope - Bungee jumping and parachuting. What is the difference?
Raak - One is head first, the other feet first.
moroni - That can be said about lots of things.
Software - What shall we talk about next; any ideas?
Rosie - Just thinking how much I dislike windy weather.
penelope - Indeed, I hate flatulence in general. Most unsociable.
Knobbly - Could flatus replace fossil fuels if efficiently collected?
Rosie - Certainly. And the plentiful bovine variety is odourless.
Software - Putting cows in gasometers would be rather cruel.
Rosie - What about a tube up the bum, then?
Projoy - You'd never fit a cow into one of those!
Projoy - (Oops. Nine words. Here's seven to compensate.)
Software - Two wrongs do not necessarily make a right.
Rosie - Shurely two negatives make a positive, if multiplied.
Knobbly - Two rites do not quite make a ceremony.
Software - Two ceremonies ddon't necessarily make it right either.
moroni - Two "right" angles make a very straight line.
Rosie - It's as easy as pi to say that.
I Say, Porter! - Hear about the yokel mathematician? Married his cosin.
Rosie - Noah used yacht varnish to get an arctan.
moroni - This conversation is a Sine of the times.
moroni - I think we need to take another angle.
penelope - Does a right angle boil at ninety degrees?
Lib - It does indeed. And removes all beetroot stains.
Rosie - Methyl formate boils at approximately ninety degrees Fahrenheit.
Software - Just back from Lisbon; ninety degrees there too.
moroni - It was ninety degrees here late last week.
Rosie - I'm sure that statement is true, but WTFRU?
penelope - Somewhere where it's ninety degrees, obviously, Rosie. Duh!
moroni - It was only in the 70's today Rosie.
moroni - But enough of the weather, in sports today...
Graham III - Wicket dot rain dot wicket wicket dot rain
Software - Rain. There has been plenty of it lately.
Rosie - That's not the most controversial comment I've seen.
Graham III - Point of contention! Not in the Atacama desert.
Rosie - The Atacama Desert is not entirely without rain.
Inkspot - We are not greedy take our spare rain.
the other jim - Spare rain comes with a degree of humidity.
Raak - Can you get an honours degree in humidity?
Rosie - Yes, but it needs less inspiration than perspiration.
penelope - No chance to perspire in this rainy weather!
Rosie - Horses sweat, gentlemen perspire but ladies merely glow.
moroni - Horses sweat because "only fools and horses work".
Rosie - Shurely working horses would sweat, whoever else works.
Software - Would anti-persperant for horses work do you think?
Rosie - It would die of hyperthermia. Humane, at least.
moroni - Horse sweat is an ingredient in school dinners.
Rosie - In 1948 it was about the only ingredient.
moroni - In the 1970's we had "Mystery Meat", scary!!!
Software - Can't comment. I never ate school dinners myself.
Software - Anyway, why are they called dinners at lunchtime?
Inkspot - Breakfast, dinner, tea and supper. No second breakfast.
penelope - No. It's breakfast, elevenses, lunch, tea, dinner, supper.
Rosie - Such regimes are the reason we're all overweight.
Software - I prefer to say a bit chubby, myself.
Raak - Try Intermittent Fasting: eat nothing every other day.
Rosie - That would play havoc with your bowel movements.
Knob-bly - Show me a motion, tra la la la-la...
Rosie - "This House strongly approves of all lavatorial humour".
moroni - Flushed with pride, round the bend with happiness.
Phil - Toilet thieves leave me nothing to go on.
Rosie - Nessun Dorma, for Milan is on the Po.
moroni - Irish invented toilet, English put hole in middle.
penelope - Thank goodness for the hole. And the leak.
penelope - Other news. Job won. Moving soon. Ahoy Grantham!
penelope - One other thing. Anyone got any spare boxes?
Raak - [pen] You could try asking at wine shops.
Rosie - (pen) Three in two minutes. See a doctor.
Software - [pen] Congratulations. Grantham? Hope Thatcher not still there.
penelope - Thatcher gone? That means the roofs are leaking.
Rosie - Or fewer fouls by Manchester City. About time.
moroni - We have a thatcher snatcher in the house!!!
penelope - New Balls. On the theme of Autumn, anyone?
Software - [pen] Is that referring to your sex life?
penelope - Good Lord no. A seasonal reference, you noodle.
Rosie - Autumn, I think, is the warm dark season.
Knobbly - "Wohl ist der Herbst ein Ehrenmann" - Johann Voß
moroni - Not all of us can speak German Knobbly.
Knobbly - It means "Surely is Autumn a man of honour"
Phil - Babelfish: "Probably the autumn is an honour man."
Software - Sounds like an advert for Carlsburg to me.
moroni - Carlsburg, probably the best advert in the world.
Phil - Actually, it's spelt "Carlsberg", as in "Saccharomyces Carlbergensis".
Phil - Drat, I mistyped "Carlsbergensis". Silly me! How ironic.
Rosie - An egregious error. The place is in ferment.
penelope - Ferment? I just found some mouldy leather gloves.
Rosie - (pen) You could become the new Charlie Dimmock.
Phil - Calm down, Rosie. Remember what the doctor said.
Rosie - What if he'd said I'd got memory loss?
moroni - Best to forget about your memory loss, Rosie.
penelope - Just remind me, what are we doing here?
Phil - [Pen] Trying to avoid discussing your sex life?
Rosie - Do people in the Morniverse actually have sex?
penelope - Believe me Rosie, I do it anywhere but here
penelope - I should announce an Official Change of Subject
Phil - Only after you apologise for your extra word.
Rosie - And for the indiscriminating nature of your libido.
penelope - Sorry. And I'll be more picky next time.
Software - It won't get better if you pick it.
Rosie - Isn't that what trade unnionists are always told?
moroni - Arthur Scargill would want some Flying Pickets instead.
Software - Surely the Flying Pickets were a pop group.
moroni - Yes they were and don't call me "Surely".
penelope - Isn't that 'Don't call me Shirley', surely, moroni?
moroni - Should be Shirley but said Surely by mishtake.
Software - I've never heard of the flying Shirleys, anyway.
penelope - Their jokes would probably go over your head
moroni - That depends upon how tall your body is.
penelope - My body? Starts at neck, finishes at legs.
penelope - Here is today's eight-word offering for your perusal.
Rosie - I never really wanted to be an engine-driver.
moroni - Does that mean what you lack is "inginuity"?
Rosie - I shall treat that remark with complete ignoral. © George Brown, ca. 1968.
penelope - I have fourteen daddy longlegs in my house today
Raak - One of them gave you an extra word.
Phil - Americans use "daddy longlegs" for a particular arachnid.
Rosie - British daddy longlegs are not arachnids at all.
Software - Quite so, but many think that they are.
Raak - I found an enormous caterpillar on my doorstep.
Bob the dog - It may be an Elephant Hawk Moth Catapillar.
Rosie - Hello, Bob the dog. Where have you been?
Software - Gosh, October already. Where has this year gone?
penelope - Shooting into the past would be my guess.
Rosie - There's three months to go. Anything could happen.
I Say, Porter! - Uses enormous CaterpillarTM to dig up neighbour's garden
Software - Can a CaterpillarTM fell my neighbour's bloody trees?
penelope - I'm conserving trees now, I can't allow that.
Rosie - pen is the Tree Czar. Be very afraid.
moroni - Large Caterpillar can produce a very large Butterfly.
Rosie - Caterpillars in the stomach must be very unnerving.
Software - One must watch out for the butterfly effect.
nights - Especially as it is the most dreadful tease.
penelope - Nights, we're not quite sure what you mean.
Rosie - Maybe it's above our heads, like most butterflies.
nights - Never mind, I don't think I know either.
Software - It's fun writing about things you don't know.
penelope - Softers, you could go far in public relations.
penelope - Or be successful writing for the Daily Mail.
nights - Or teaching at a university in France, even.
Rosie - That really is a most disturbing revelation, nights.
nights - Why thank you, Rosie. I made it myself.
Software - Gosh! Could you make me one as well?
penelope - I'll have a go. I eat cheesy peas.
nights - I've done it all my life. No, wait...
moroni - That is funny, I usually eat Peasy Cheese.
Software - I prefer peas or cheese, not a melange.
Rosie - Yes, some things don't blend. Marmalade and kippers.
penelope - I think they do, actually. Try high speed.
Tuj - Marmalade And Kippers were a Dutch musical twosome.
nights - Oh yes. They were banned, weren't they? Hmm?
Phil - I like a little marmalade with breakfast sausages.
Raak - Maple syrup goes well with bacon at breakfast.
Software - I'm rather partial to Cheddar cheese and jam.
penelope - I eat my organic frozen peas with honey.
Phil - I dislike maple syrup. Golden or treacle please.
nights - [Raak] Agreed - and also with sausages and pancakes.
Tuj - Cereal-wise, lemonade isn't a good subsitute for milk.
penelope - Lemonade on Rice Krispies would go crazy wild!
Botherer - Brings new meaning to snap, crackle and pop!
penelope - I'll have to try that one out now
nights - Do let us know how you get on.
Tuj - Frosties can be sent through the postal system.
Rosie - They may also pass through the digestive system.
Phil - With Parcelforce they can also be anally tracked.
Software - With Royal Mail they'll probably not get through.
penelope - ConstiparcelForce. Not eight words, just one good one.
Rosie - Doesn't Parceline sound like a French girl's name?
Tuj - There are no games of Mornington Crescent here.
Software - [Rosie] No, Parceline is posh talk for china.
Raak - Isn't it a lubricant for *ahem* unmentionable practices?
Rosie - Parceline hydrochloride is illegal. Street name is "wrapping".
penelope - Addicts take Sellotape afterwards to hold it together.
nights - The French dub of Kill Bill's quite good.
Rosie - How does one say "to dub" in French?
Phil - "doubler un film" means "to dub a film"
nights - Rarely is it done well; I was surprised.
Knobbly - Perfume adverts on TV are always badly dubbed.
Rosie - Especially on S4C, so it is widely averred.
Software - Gerry Adams' lips still seem to be unsynchronized.
penelope - I've got to write 400 words. Hard work.
Rosie - Surely that depends on the subject, doesn't it?
Raak - Hard to fit in, or to pad out?
penelope - To draw the 'news' out of the subject
nights - Just write in a bigger font. It works.
Tuj - 400 = 50 x 8. Use this game.
penelope - Have we done 50 eight word moves yet?
Quendalon - Far more than 50 moves, I should think.
Rosie - We have done about one thousand three hundred.
Tuj - One thousand two hundred and thirty six.
Maybe.
Rosie - Shurely you didn't count them one by one?
Quendalon - That would be far too tedious, I think.
penelope - No, just tedious enough. Imagine it. *stifles yawn*
nights - A discovery - pretzels, in general, make poor sandwiches.
Raak - Have you tried filling the holes with cheese?
Tuj - [Rosie and Quenders] Hint: click on a name.
Software - [Tuj] Amazing! I'd not noticed that till then.
Rosie - (Tuj) You might have told us right click.
Quendalon - Yes, that would have been far more informative.
Software - Have you noticed the mornings are getting darker?
penelope - I can't tell, it's been too dark recently.
Rosie - Me neither, because I don't get up early. you could say.
CdM - How about seven words for a while?
Rosie - Some very quick thinking there by CdM.
Software - Surely that would change the game's nature?
Phil - Newcomers might be confused by a change.
penelope - Seven words from now on. That's clear.
nights - I am certainly willing to try it.
Phil - What if that scrolls off the top?
Tuj - What if some of us refuse to co-operate?
Rosie - You'll be Procrusteanised.
penelope - Yeah, we'll have to compensate for you
Knobbly - ti la sol fa mi re do
Tuj - Does anyone know what game Rosie is playing?
penelope - Oi Rosie, what's your game, sunshine? Seven?
Rosie - Just trying it on a bit, friends. :-)
Phil - So, are we doing seven and/or eight?
Tuj - [Phil] I'm sticking to my guns. [Rosie] Ha!
Rosie - I'm with Tuj here. Eight gives more scope.
CdM - [Rosie] Well, sure it does. Fourteen gives even more scope than that. Your point?
Tuj - [CdM] Point: eight's in the title. Fourteen isn't.
penelope - Now, now lads, keep it nice. A decision?
Rosie - I vote to keep it as it was.
Knobbly - I agree; that is probably the simplest solution.
Software - After all, that's the name of the game.
Phil - Octoverbal moves are what you shall see from me.
Rosie - Four-nil, four-nil, four nil, four-nil!
Knobbly - I thought we'd decided hyphenations counted as one?
Software - Quite so. A yellow card for Rosie, then.
Kim - And another one for Phil, wouldn't you say?
Quendalon - We must take a stand against invalid moves.
CdM - Why?
Phil - Oops! Meant to say "you'll" not "you shall".
Tuj - Crossharbour & London Arena, home at Goodge Street.
penelope - This could end in tears, mark my words
Quendalon - Canary Wharf, declaring home at Tottenham Court Road.
Software - This game is morphing. Are we getting bored?
Tuj - [Softers] Not morphing; it's in the game description.
Rosie - CdM really is a wind-up merchant, isn't he?
penelope - [Rosie] One of the very best, yes sirree!
CdM - [Rosie] Who, me?
Chalky - Now now now - what's going on here then?
Chalky - *waiting for Projoy's answer to my AVMA questions*
Chalky - Thought I'd while away a moment or ten.
Rosie - What-ho, Chalks. Would you like a choccy?
nights - TV in Strasbourg: nine channels, and all crap.
Chalky - [nights] and your point is? [Rosie] yes please :-)
CdM - [All] People! The rules of the game are oppressing you! Take a stand! Strike out for liberty and freedom!
penelope - Ignore this attention-seeking behaviour. There's freedom in conforming.
Phil - Three words good. Five better. Eight is best.
penelope - Is this turning into an eight-word Orwellian nightmare?
nights - [Chalky] It was just an expression of discontent.
Raak - Now is the winter of our dissed content.
penelope - I've got microwaved fish pie for lunch today
CdM - *nods eight times*
Software - [pen] I'm eating a mince pie right now.
Quendalon - You're all making me hungry. Please stop that.
CdM - [Quendalon] It looks as if your request was all too effective.
Raak - Rule 17 has something to say about this.
penelope - Rule 17 says: "Never order the shellfish dishes."
Quendalon - How unfortunate! I love shellfish. (Especially the scallops.)
CdM - [Raak] Rule 17? Are you sure?
Chalky - Can't bear shellfish. [CdM] You being provocative again?
CdM - Still, Chalky, still.
nights - Are anyone else's trousers rotating? No? Just me?
Rosie - Rotation about which axis? x, y or z?
Rosie - (x to your left, y up, z forward).
Chalky - This is all way too mathematical for me.
Software - Perhaps it is around the 'j' axis, then.
Rosie - Perish the thought that nights' trousers are imaginary.
nights - Indeed. That'd give the Alsatians a shock.
Rosie - That'd be a seven-word posting you put up. Mine is 8, 9 or 10 according to taste.
nights - Oh goodness me. Can't count. Very sorry, everyone.
Software - Never mind, it could happen to anyone.
Rosie - I'm sure Lynne Truss wouldn't be so cavalier.
nights - Yes, well, she's something of a paragon, no?
CdM - [nights] Doesn't bother me. :-)
Tuj - Comma, semi-colon; full stop. "Quotation marks" exclamation mark!
Rosie - I think it will be very cold tonight.
Red Wolf - It is very cold here in East Tennessee.
Knobbly - It is very cold in my nose. Atchoo!
Rosie - Please sneeze properly. There's a word at issue.
Software - It is even fairly cold here; quite unusual.
penelope - That gives me the chance to eat more.
Red Wolf - Winter break over January Ninth, and then, school...
penelope - [Red Wolf] Slacker. I'm back on the second.
Phil - Back to work Boxing Day morning, about 9.
Software - We're away for Christmas; not for New Year.
Red Wolf - I study at the University of Tennesse - Knoxville.
penelope - Tennessee: two ens, two esses and four ees.
Rosie - Are you studying British Humour? None here, mate.
nights - French universities are ace - not back till February.
Red Wolf - Studying math this time round. Français, [nights]? Bien!
Quendalon - Lack of sleep is really tiring me out.
Rosie - We're dying to know why you don't sleep.
penelope - He can't stand the dreams, the evil dreams...
nights - [Red Wolf] Mais bien sûr. J'habite là, donc...
Quendalon - Nothing terribly exciting; I'm assigned to jury duty.
penelope - Isn't that the perfect excuse for daytime snoozing?
Rosie - I fought you was an upright citizen, pen.
Red Wolf - Happy Christmas and Happy New Year to all peoples!
SteveA - This game is absurd! Eight words? No way!!
Simons Mith - 0x2C736559 0x20746920 0x72207369 0x65687461 0x20612072 0x6C6C6973 0x696C2079 0x2E74696D
Quendalon - Sorry, I don't understand. Would you please translate?
Rosie - I think he's saying "Naught for your comfort"
Raak - [Simons] ",seY ti r siehta a rllisil y=tim"?
Simons Mith - 0x525B6161 0x5D6B4D20 0x42534C2D 0x4253202E 0x61446E6D 0x6520646E 0x61696E6E 0x73652173
Rosie - I've a good mind to post in Welsh.
Raak - 0x5B534D5D 0x20317374 0x20726576 0x39642062 0x79746573 0x2C20326E 0x6420776F 0x7264732E
nights - You all know I'm a geek - Languages Ahoy!
Red Wolf - Perhaps Russian... С Рождеством и с Новым Годом!
CdM - It's all going to end in tears.
penelope - I think I've said that before, CdM. Kleenex?
Phil - Testing. One two. One. One. Two. One two.
Rosie - Passes randomness test. Numbers show no discernible pattern.
Knobbly - Anyone think SteveA is going to come back?
penelope - Maybe it's time for SteveB. New start?
nights - I've got BBC World now. Still nothing on.
Rosie - Well, get dressed then, you great narcissistic creep.
penelope - Really! You should be dressed by January 4th.
penelope - too bold, too bold, too bold, too bold!
Software - Trying to assert your authority, are you pen?
penelope - Quite the opposite. Trying to rein it in!
nights - You'll all be pleased to hear I'm naked.
Red Wolf - I'm not pleased to hear it. I'm here.
Rosie - You'll be relieved to hear I'm fully dressed.
penelope - I'm pleased I'm fully dressed. In the office.
Software - Stuffy suits are the order of the day.
Lib - I'm wearing my dressing gown over clothes. Nippy.
nights - Whee! I am still naked! See me run!
Raak - Are you running on the beach in Bude?
Rosie - The Lord preserve us from latter-day Greek athletes.
nights - Do we have a problem with my nudity?
Projoy - It rather depends what you do with it.
Ella - There's a time and a place for everything.
Rosie - What's the time and place for overcooked cabbage?
penelope - In the bin, and immediately, in my opinion.
Raak - All culinary errors can be salvaged by frying.
penelope - I don't think that's true for lumpy bechemel
Tuj - Or cereal made with milk that's gone off.
Phil - [penelope] lumpy bechamel? why else did God invent sieves?
Rosie - What about my case-hardened sausages? They can kill.
Quendalon - Right now, I could kill for a sausage.
Software - I like sausages, but would hesitate at murder.
Rosie - Some would claim that slaughtering pigs is murder.
Kim - Not least the pigs themselves, I would wager.
Software - Can slaughtering sausages be murder by implication then?
Rosie - You can murder a curry, equally a sausage.
Tesseract - Some pigs request assisted suicide,is this murder?
Thatguy - zero zero zero zero zero zero zero zero
Software - Tesseract - where does one find those talking pigs?
penelope - If we told you, we must kill you
nights - The trouble is that there is some trouble.
penelope - [nights] You got your troubles, I got mine.
Software - [pen] That would make a good song title.
Kim - There's some trouble up at the mill, apparently.
Rosie - I think they've run out of cotton reels.
Ella - Don't believe what they say. They're talking bobbins.
Phil - Talking bobbins? Whatever next - a sewing machine singer?
Software - Talking pigs, talking bobbins, too much animation here.
nights - Oh, but that my students would shut up.
Quendalon - Provide them with peanut butter, and perhaps caramel.
Software - [Quendalon] would that diet help bobbins/pigs talk?
Quendalon - [Software] I don't think it helps anyone talk.
Rosie - (nights) I thought you taught in conversation classes.
penelope - No-one has said anything since Thursday. Why not?
CdM - Nothing to say.
Tuj - I've not been playing enough Mornington Crescent lately.
penelope - [CdM] Would you expand on that statement, please?
CdM - [pen] Sure!
Quendalon - mc5 is a bit short on Mornington Crescent.
Rosie - (Quendalon) You mean "It's short for Mornington Crescent".
Quendalon - [Rosie] No, I actually meant what I wrote.
nights - [Rosie] Trouble is, they keep yelling in French.
penelope - You could rule that they shout in English?
Tuj - I think I have missed a subtlety somewhere.
Quendalon - [Tuj] Subtleties have a tendency to do that.
penelope - Perhaps we need some subtitles, not more subtleties.
Quendalon - Only if each subtitle consists of eight words.
Software - Perhaps we could dub over in English instead.
penelope - We're on a frogspawn hunt today. Seen any?
Software - A little early in the season, isn't it?
penelope - That's the point. I want freakish phenology statistics.
Quendalon - We all want something freakish now and then.
Phil - No frogspawn on my head. Oops, that's phrenology.
penelope - No, that's amphibian kidnapping and punishable by law.
Rosie - Would that be the Frogs (Abduction) Act, 1805?
penelope - Nooo, it predates that by years. Tadnapping 1617.
blamelewis - I knew the frog lied... It was amfibbing.
penelope - That starts a cascade... reps tiling and stuff.
nights - Went to the library, but each book: "reddit".
Tuj - [nights] How long have you been a frog?
Rosie - (Tuj) He isn't; he just works in France.
Software - Nobody works in France, unions are too strong.
nights - That much is true - Vive Les Syndicats! Ouuraaah!
Quendalon - I'm not sure 'Ouuraaah!' qualifies as a word.
Graham III - Ouuraaaah! Graaooohuuuuu! Meeeeeaaaargh! Blauauauuaauor! Mooooooooooooooo! Chchchchchchchchaaaa! aiergiiiiii! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiooooooooooooooooooooooow!
Chalky - Now now Graham the third - that's just silly :-)
Tuj - Have we tried any poems in this format?
nights - Ouuraaah is a word - it's a French word.
penelope - 'Cocorico' - French equivalent of 'cock a doodle dooo!'
Rosie - (nuits) Et ça veut dire quoi, ce mot?
Phil - [Rosie] I think it means "hurrah", if memory serves.
Phil - Oops, I didn't count [Rosie] as a word!
Graham III - "To Kokoraki" is Cock-a doodle dooo in Greek...
blamelewis - "To Hokeycokey" is to prat around while drunk.
nights - Phil a raison. Moi, je me couche maintenant.
penelope - Eight-worders in French don't count here. Try encore.
Rosie - Dyma wyth gair yng Nghymraeg. Cyfieithiad ar gael.
nights - Don't they? News to me. I'll try again.
Darren - What's been happening here while I've been away?
Rosie - People were asking where you had got to.
Software - Who were those people? I was not one.
Rosie - If not asking then certainly were probably wondering.
CdM - Sssssshhhhh! He's back.
penelope - [CdM] Shush yourself! You're out of line, buddy.
CdM - [pen] So, sue me, you conformist person you.
CdM - (That was only eight words by accident.)
penelope - I think rebels always want to conform, really.
Chalky - [Darren] I was one of the people that was wondering ....
Rosie - (Chalks) I thought you knew everything about everybody.
Tuj - [Rosie] Are our details all filed away somewhere?
Rosie - (Tuj) "Filed" is not quite the correct term.
blamelewis - "Severely chafed" would be a more accurate term.
Rosie - This is all getting rather abrasive, isn't it?
Tuj - When the going's rough, the rough get going.
Software - Roughage get you going, that is for sure.
Rosie - Especially Italians, for Milan is on the Po.
Tuj - [Rosie] Too devastatingly amusing to follow, I fear.
blamelewis - To fear amusement is to devastate Rosie's followers
Phil - We have nothing to fear but Rosie himself
Tuj - [Phil] What then does Rosie have to fear?
penelope - Failure to make fearful those who fear him?
Rosie - That's too oxymoronic for this time of night.
penelope - Isn't it pleonastic? Or self referential? Arrrrgh... brain....
blamelewis - [pen] It looks more like pyrex to me...
Tuj - Now I think of "Pyrex of the Caribbean".
penelope - The earth moved for me, alone, last night.
Rosie - (pen) So when will you actually be buried?
penelope - Not for a long time yet, I hope.
blamelewis - But did you notice the earthquake at all?
Software - Not for me. I was away in Brussels.
Graham III - I slept right through it. I was tired.
Rosie - I slept through You and Yours. Tiredness irrelevant.
Tuj - We've all slept for the last three days.
Rosie - We are sleeping the sleep of the just.
penelope - Sleep of the just what? Just plain lazy?
Software - Just downed ten pints more like for Rosie. ;o)
Rosie - Alas, those days are well in the past.
blamelewis - Alas for those days passed in a well
Rosie - Not the only thing passed in the well.
penelope - This has been a really lazy Sunday. Nice.
Tuj - I had a lazy week. Work tomorrow =(
Software - I shall have a lazy week; work tomorrow.
penelope - Chick pea Moroccanese with prunes and bacon tonight.
Software - Warning to keep clear of the ladies tomorrow?
penelope - How come beer doesn't get the same warning?
Tuj - I detect a certain deceleration in this game.
Rosie - The deceleration is proportional to the retarding force.
Phil - There are certainly some major retarding forces about.
penelope - Effort should go into moving forward, not back.
Software - Right then, let's everyone get out and push.
Quendalon - One, two, three, push! One, two, three, push!
Rosie - It would be helpful to release the handbrake.
penelope - OK, who's got the handbrake? Let it go!
Tuj - I think there's something wrong with the clutch.
Rosie - Never mind the clutch; put it in neutral.
blamelewis - (looks underneath) wouldn't some more wheels be helpful?
Software - There's enough of us, just lift it up.
Phil - Where's the Anthill Mob when you need them?
Rosie - That's no way to talk about the Chinese.
blamelewis - "Huh heh huh hulk hulk. Penelope's gonna die..."
blamelewis - (well you try rendering cartoon chuckling in text...)
penelope - That's not a very nice thing to say.
Software - [pen] - how can one be rude nicely, then?
Chalky - Just taype it heah in a naice eccent
penelope - Why do you need to say it anyway?
Rosie - The Grim Reaper always has the last word.
penelope - No he does not. Not by any standard.
blamelewis - That was just my favourite Anthill Mob line...
peneloep - It's no good quoting movies at me. Heh-heh-huh-hulk-hulk.
Rosie - I've only just noticed your new Dutch name.
Tuj - I know I shouldn't, but that brought sniggers.
blamelewis - [Tuj] Sniggers will always be Maragon to me.
I Say, Porter! - Wasn't Sniggers the one that famously "Played Pop"?
Quendalon - [ISP] Doesn't Sniggers contain chocolate, peanuts and caramel?
penelope - Stobbit. You're making me hungry. What's for dinner?
Rosie - I'm sure Alf Stobbit played for Middlesbrough once.
Quendalon - Actually, I believe a Stobbit saved Middle Earth.
Tuj - I need to mention Eddie Stobbit, but how?
Software - Doesn't he name all his lorries after laddies?
Rosie - Are you in the right game, old bean?
blamelewis - Old bean: astonishingly unsuccessful precursor to Old Spice.
Tuj - Old spice: rejected geriatric member of girl group.
penelope - It's about time I said another eight words.
Kim - These aren't the words I was thinking about.
I Say, Porter! - Shurely "These aren't the words you're looking for"?
Rosie - But you cannot possibly know Kim's innermost thoughts.
Tuj - Your Mum cannot possibly know Kim's innermost thoughts!!!!!!!!
nights - Stage Managers do not make tea. Ever. EVER.
Tuj - Your Mum doesn't make tea ever!!!!!!!! Annoying already.
Quendalon - I have two words for Tuj: "Your Mum!!!!!!!!"
Tuj - [Quenders] When can I have the other six?
Quendalon - [Tuj] Where's the "-ers" diminutive from, regionally speaking?
Rosie - (Quenders) It's not regional but rather upper class.
Tuj - [Rosie] Ha! It's just from Test Match Special.
Rosie - (Tuj) I suspect it has publich school origins.
Rosie - I suspect I've Germanised a certain word there.
Software - My mum used Germanised on my grazed knees.
penelope - Grazes, burns, spots and pimples, who needs 'em?
Phil - Dorothy: Grazes and pimples and burns! Oh my!
penelope - Rhett: Grazes? Pimples? I don't give a damn!
Rosie - (pen) Frankly ma'am, your insouciance utterly astounds me.
CdM - Are you people still stuck in your eight-words-in-a-move rut?
Software - [CdM] Nobody has really noticed I don't think.
Phil - [CdM] I don't do it deliberately any more.
Rosie - Quite accidentally, this consists of eight words precisely.
Quendalon - I don't believe that it was an accident.
Quendalon - In fact, I suspect you of treachery. J'accuse!
Rosie - My surname is Hughes but I'm not Jack.
Software - And I can say it's not Yosser either.
Rosie - It wouldn't be, bcause I can't even yoss.
Tuj - Don't worry: the Barber of Seville couldn't barb.
Rosie - And Field Marshal Montgomery didn't rearrange the countryside.
Software - And General De Gaulle was much more specific.
Rosie - And do spin doctors really repair industrial centriguges?
penelope - No, they just correct other people's typos, Rosie
Rosie - (pen) So why didn't they correct mine? Bastards!
Software - Then would that mean witches have spell checkers?
Phil - Are programmers in favour of metric weighing systems?
Rosie - Journalists should be carved up with a hacksaw.
penelope - Weather watchers should be tested for their mettle.
Software - Weather watchers should test their seaweed every day.
Tuj - She sells sea shells on the sea shore.
penelope - Shut up the shutters and sit in the ...
Rosie - Red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry.
Software - Peter Piper picked a peck of pepper corns.
Phil - However, the sixth sick sheikh's sixth sheep's sick.
Rosie - Not guilty then. The Leith police dismisseth us.
Tuj - But please note, I'm not the pheasant plucker.
penelope - Tuj, are you the pheasant plucker's son then?
Chalky - And will you always pluck the pheasants 'til .... ?
Rosie - The pheasant plucker comes. No, the job's crap.
Software - Has anyone noticed? The weather has improved, slightly.
Chalky - It improved, yes, but then deteriorated a bit
Phil - Just as I read that, the sun appeared.
Rosie - ...... and then went in again. Tomorrow be warm.
penelope - Saturday: warm; Sunday: warm with showers; Conclusion? April.
Raak - I got a slight sunburn on Saturday, cycling.
Software - I also caught the sun on my nose.
Rosie - That is some hooter you must have, mate.
Chalky - [Rosie] tee hee hee heee heeee chuckle chuckle
Software - You should know, Rosie, you have met it.
Tuj - Hooter? I thought that it was Humph's walrus?
Rosie - The Softwarian schnozzle is normal, more or less.
penelope - I had cheezbrgr for lunch. It was yours.
Rosie - (pen) That's impossible. I had already eaten it.
penelope - [rosie] i am inzide you, eatn ur fud.
Rosie - (pen) You realise that makes you a tapeworm?
penelope - Loltapeworms? Now there's food for thought. Or not.
Raak - "im in ur bwls, pokn my head out"
Chalky - *is not really appreciating the fake textual terminology*
Phil - [Chalky] I concur with your sentiments entirely, m8.
Chalky - Ah well. Who's up for a Sonnet? Anyone?
Raak - Would it not be insanely hard to do?
Chalky - Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Tuj - Or something that's a touch less plagiaristic?
Rosie - (Chalky) Thou mayest. I am dull and sweaty.
Raak - The scansion's fine thus far, but whither rhyme?
Rosie - Scansion is normally more withered than rhyme here.
Tuj - So, shall we try for a sonnet then?
Raak - Is this a task too difficult for us?
penelope - Have we changed to eight word questions only?
Raak - Let's boldly go where none have gone before
Chalky - Let's seize the day and take no pri-son-ers
Rosie - Steady on. This is getting a bit dynamic.
Raak - Great struggle makes this battle worth the more.
Raak - (That literal boldness was not what I meant.)
Chalky - We'll fight the fight in full-blown clichéd verse
Raak - And sweep the field of sceptics and faint-hearts
Chalky - For those who dare to sabotage our quest
Rosie - Onward, Morniversal soldiers, marching as to hostility scenarios.
Raak - We shall reserve the keenest of our darts.
Rosie - Our foes shall quake at our felicitous constructions.
Chalky - With poisoned tip to quell such vile unrest
Raak - So wage we our campaign for well-spun lines
Chalky - Our weapons primed with language, form and wit
Raak - The straitness of our measure shows the signs
Rosie - That we are really like up for it
Raak - (That scansion's foul; let all avert their eyes!)
Chalky - Resolved we weave a fitting end to it
Raak - (If I count right, the final couplet's here:)
Raak - If I count right, the final couplet's here:
Raak - (In afterthought, my thought seemed well to fit.)
Chalky -
Let's boldly go where none have gone before
Let's seize the day and take no pri-son-ers
Great struggle makes this battle worth the more
We'll fight the fight in full-blown clichéd verse

And sweep the field of sceptics and faint-hearts
For those who dare to sabotage our quest
We shall reserve the keenest of our darts
With poisoned tip to quell such vile unrest

So wage we our campaign for well-spun lines
Our weapons primed with language, form and wit
The straitness of our measure shows the signs
Resolved we weave a fitting end to it

If I count right, the final couplet's here
To doubters - we have writ what we hold dear

Thank you, Raak, for believing - that was fun :-)
Chalky - OK - fancy poetry's done - time for a chat?
Raak - [Chalky] Thank you for the dance, fun indeed!
Quendalon - But that last line, it has nine words!
Quendalon - (The last line of the sonnet, that is.)
Raak - [Quendalon] God is perfect, but we are not.
Raak - On the other hand, "we've enscribed" would fit.
Chalky - [Raak] Perfect. I rushed and spoiled it. Sorry :-(
CdM - Can you do a haiku, then? Three separate lines, mind: no cheating.
penelope -
Syncopating this
Is indubitably tough
Like making pancakes.
CdM - [pen] Not bad! But I meant three lines, each of eight words...
penelope - [CdM] I did think about that. How can eight words be squeezed out of five or seven syllables, unless you speak broad Yorkshire? Go on, show me! :oP
Phil - I am the tall bloke. That is me. In proper Yorks. accent becomes, I'm t'tall bloke, that's me
blamelewis - The poetry is great, please stick to eight!
CdM - Well, at least I broke the octofascistic hold for a couple of moves there. There is hope for you all yet.
Raak - Four feet per line makes all words short.
Tuj - All work no play makes Raak dull boy?
nights - Oh no, not another very difficult poetry game.
Rosie - (CdM) You have repeatedly trampled octofascism to death. :-)
Tuj - [nights] Do I detect a weary situational acceptance?
Raak - Hard thought is good play for the mind.
penelope - Doesn't anyone have eight pithy words for Friday?
Raak - We get the day off, in three days.
Raak - Let's skive off now for this week end.
Rosie - The Bank Holiday will be a total washout. Like colonic irrigation.
nights - We have no bank holiday here in France.
Raak - The sum shone all day here, no rain.
penelope - Some nice weather in Holland, where I stayed.
Phil - Day off? My next is seven weeks away.
Raak - Sun and Mon had much rain and wind.
penelope - Phil, you work from home - it's a pub
Software - I spent the weekend in wet west Wales.
Rosie - I bet it was warmer than wet northeast Surrey.
Software - Well, it just reached 12C on Monday afternoon.
Phil - penelope, I know. Still no days off though.
nights - Goodness it's warm here. 29 degrees today.
blamelwis - There may be 29, but the third's worst.
Rosie - The second's quite bad enough for a burn. My burn, nearly a year ago, has healed completely.
penelope - Quite so, Rosie. Meanwhile, it's Monday, and now...?
Tuj - [pen] ...for something completely different? I like maps.
Rosie - (Tuj) It's good to meet a fellow cartophile.
Chalky - Yeah - the map thing - even when I was young I always needed to know where I was. Sorry - have I broken the 8-word thingy?
Phil - Maps rock! Satnav is so crap it hurts.
Rosie - (Chalky) Not at all, m'dear. Pretend you're CdM. Ooh, get 'im.
CdM - [Chalky] Careful. It ain't easy to pretend to be me.
Software - [CdM] Yes, I find that a problem too.
Tuj - Rosie's last two comments have been somewhat cediemulant.
Rosie - Maybe so, but this one is satnavophobically Philoconfirmatory. (Tuj) V good, BTW.
penelope - Try switching it off and on again, Rosie
Rosie - I did. It's still James Naughtie wittering on.
Tuj - Should we switch MC5 on and off again?
FGZstar - I really don't understand what's going on here.
Quendalon - And yet, here you are. How very peculiar.
Phil - [FGZstar] Strangely, I think that's almost a prerequisite.
Software - Its raining again from where I am standing.
Phil - Are you standing on a cloud then, Software?
Rosie - It could be that he's having a slash.
Software - Rosie's explanation would better stand up to scrutiny.
penelope - Eeeeeuuuuwwww. Not something I'd like to scrutinise, really.
Phil - [penelope] Especially not when it is standing up
Rosie - In that state "rainfall" production is largely inhibited.
Software - It is certainly hard to disprove that statement.
nights - Goodness, I leave for five minutes, and look...
penelope - The eight word rule restored? Or something else?
Botherer - Been away for ages but now I'm back.
Rosie - I told you it was an addiction, mate.
penelope - I held off for four days. Cold turkey.
Tuj - I went on holiday for a week. Returned.
Botherer - Not the most popular of games, is it?
Software - It has its moments, perhaps this is another.
penelope - Damn. I think I blinked and missed it.
Rosie - I think that should be blunk, like wunk.
Tuj - An ant and antelope are after an annulment.
penelope - Is that because Ant and Bee hooked up?
FGZstar - I thought that Ant hooked up with Dec
Tuj - Everyone did - "all hands on Dec" they said.
Software - I thought we were in Jun not Dec.
Rosie - Yes, we are but not for very long. Clearly this is the Department of Great Thoughts.
Software - So, Tim is out, better luck next time.
Tuj - [Softers] Your Automatic Wimbledon Comment Generator needs updating.
Software - I wonder if the rain will stop soon?
Rosie - (Softers) There will be real rain today (Wednesday).
Tuj - Twelve hours of the wretched stuff so far!!
penelope - Don't care. Going to Holland tomorrow, my birthday. :o)
Software - It didn't rain Wednesday at all over here. :o)
Software - We did have a brief shower on Thursday.
Phil - Cold and wet in Scotland all next week.
Botherer - Come on, people! Think of new games!
Raak - I know! Each move seven words long!
CdM - [Raak] That was already tried, but by someone with much less authority than you.
Botherer - [CdM] Thirteen words it is you want now then? Yoda speak I like then...
Software - Those aren't new games, just a rearranged version.
Raak - To a connoisseur, each number is completely different.
Raak - Seven is good, six is better.
Tuj - I've said it before: it's eight for me.
Software - Yes, quite. It's an octal base for me.
Kim - Six words good! Seven words baaaaad!
Raak - But five is even better.
penelope - Four is plenty.
CdM - 3?
Kim - Whither syntax?
penelope - Gone.
Software - ( )
Rosie - i2
penelope - This is ridiculous. Let's get back to business.
CdM - y?
Software - I'm with pen. Not in the biblical sense.
Rosie - Ah! So we have a writer amongst us.
Knobbly - I haven't contributed for rather a long time.
Rosie - Have your knees been playing up, old chap?
Tuj - The quick brown fox jumps ...to be continued...
Rosie - .....over the fence and exuberantly shags receptive vixen.
Software` - We've now moved to nature study I see.
Raak - One for sorrow, two for joy, eight for...?
Botherer - ...the hell of it? Makes sense to me...
penelope - I've just made mushroom soup. From mushrooms. Yuk.
Rosie - (pen) More details, please, particularly regarding the yuckiness.
penelope - The soup was delicious. I hate whole mushrooms.
Software - Why does turtle soup contain no whole turtles?
Rosie - It would be too easy to mock them.
penelope - And they don't fit on the soup spoon.
Inkspot - Tried terrapin soup? a nipper in a dipper
Rosie - I prefer alphabet soup. It's educative, quite literally.
Software - What ever happened to traditional Brown Windsor soup?
penelope - Soup's off, dear. Want a nice prawn cocktail?
Rosie - Soup's off? Did the tanker not turn up?
Software - If the soup's off, there is always Spam.
Rosie - There is very little nourishment in junk emails.
Software - There is very little nourishment in Spam either.
penelope - Very little intellectual nourishment in here right now...
Rosie - Well, I did watch University Challenge last night.
Software - Were you able to answer any questions, though?
Rosie - I just like hearing the words "Jesus - HUGHES."
Software - This intellect seems to have halted the flow.
Rosie - To halt the flow you should take Imodium.
Software - Depends. It could be an incontinence pad, perhaps.
Phil - Or Luciano Pavarotti. Oops! Wrong kind of Tena.
penelope - Oh dear. It has all gone downhill, innit?
Software - It is easier going downhill than uphill.
Rosie - Quite so. Gravity has much to answer for.
penelope - Gravity is such a drag. Let's lighten up!
Software - Pen - I can not imagine you in drag.
penelope - My impression of a woman is quite convincing
Phil - Oh dear, dear, penelope. Who told you that?
penelope - [Phil] Your boyfriend, wearing pink shirt and earrings.
Software - Pen, you must have had years of practice.
Rosie - Let her tell us precisely how many years.
penelope - Are you all still holding your collective breaths?
Rosie - I'd rather be holding yours, to be honest.
Software - Rosie, you seem to have developed a lisp.
Rosie - Yeth I have, and I'm only thixty-five. Geddit?
Software - I thought that I said lisp not limp.
Rosie - References to limpness will be treated with derision.
Raak - Dr. Peabody's Best Derision, one shilling a bottle.
Software - At that price I'll take a dozen, please.
Rosie - Useful when listening to politcians on the media.
Knobbly - This post has exactly the right number of
penelope - Come on, come on, I hate the suspense
Knobbly - ...words necessary to pass muster in this game.
Software - Is that all? I was expecting a revelation.
Rosie - You'll find quite a few at the back.
nights - Does anyone here recall Blue Jam? Quite extraordinary.
Software - No, but I've a jar of blackberry jelly.
Rosie - (nights) Can you play C Jam Blues, though?
nights - If you can whistle it, I'll try to.
Rosie - Here it is: Woohoo, -, -, woohoo, woohoo, Woooo Hoo.
nights - Hmm. May be beyond my musical capabilities. Sorry.
penelope - Switswoo, la-di-da, switswoo, switswoo, switswoo swoooooo bum bum.
nights - I believe penelope is speaking in tongues again.
Software - What do you expect? It's probably Double Dutch.
penelope - It was an Edith Piaf song, Padam Padam.
nights - Ah. I see. Well, very nice, pen. Yes.
Software - Gosh, it is October already. How time flies!
penelope - And a new week! Eight Monday words, anyone?
Tuj - "this, queen, eldritch, lemming, towers, quell, mensch, trauma"
Knobbly - That sounds like a rather promising plot outline.
nights - I, am, fed, up, with, my, job. OK?
Rosie - Isn't imparting knowledge to others is very fulfilling?
Kim - Perhaps you could even teach Rosie about syntax.
Rosie - Oh dear! So much for the Whoops button.
nights - I was having a bad day. Better today!
penelope - Better now indeed. It's the weekend. Laundry looms.
Rosie - Sorry, pen; what the hell are laundry looms?
nights - Pen, I know what you mean. Laundry. Ugh.
penelope - I love ironing. Is that a bit freaky?
Kim - Not at all, Pen. What iron've you got?
Tuj - "Iron've" is an unusual word. Iron've iron've iron've.
Software - You can come and do my ironing, pen.
Rosie - Steel yourself and cast ironing to the winds.
penelope - Teflon plate with sports suspension and steam boost.
Kim - Cool. Mine's a rear sidewinder with overhead underhangs.
Software - Mine's a pint. Ironing's just a necessary evil.
penelope - A pint of steam? Is that all? Wuss.
Software - It's all right for you, you're a girl.
penelope - That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, Softers.
Tuj - [pen] There's something very Mainwaringesque about that line.
penelope - Sorry about that. I was in bossy mode.
Software - [pen] So much for your girly side, then.
penelope - Words to the wise. Girly side *is* bossy.
Rosie - That's the most tautological statement I've ever heard.
penelope - Do you want me to tell you again?
Software - Oooh! I like it when you're dominant, pen.
penelope - I don't think that was what I meant...
Knobbly - Well, if you don't know, we certainly don't!
penelope - I knew none of you knew, you know
Software - We'd like to know if you know, though.
Tuj - Anyone know if I know what's going on?
penelope - I'm not sure. How much do you know?
staniel - he knows more than he's letting on. maybe.
Rosie - I really don't know what's going on here.
Software - It's all on a need to know basis.
Tuj - I don't wish to know that, oh no.
Rosie - I think Tuj's real name is John Major.
penelope - Who are you calling Major in here, Rosie?
Tuj - [Rosie] That's hard for a twenty-one-year-old to take!
Rosie - Fair enough, I never fancied Edwina Curry either.
Software - Nor me, but maybe she's a good shag.
penelop - Change of subject. My, what a gloomy weekend.
penelop - I appear to have lost a vowel somewhere.
Rosie - I expect you left it on the train.
Tuj - [Rosie] Less likely if she has a care.
Rosie - pen is without a care, not a car.
Software - [Rosie] Are you implying that pen doesn't care?
penelope - Quite right. I don't. Off to Holland tomorrow. :D
Tuj - Auf wiedersehen! No, wait... Bon voyage? Hang on...
Software - Pen? Have you come back from Holland yet?
penelope - Yup, back, but 'flu. It stole my holiday.
Rosie - Football, though, steals the brain, which is worse.
penelope - Flu abated, hacking cough, but still off work.
Software - I'm always off work but have to attend.
Rosie - I do not recognise this thing called "work".
penelope - Come now, chaps. Are you lost for words?
Software - Buy me a couple of pints, I'll talk.
Rosie - That wouldn't get you far in Guantanamo Bay.
penelope - Eight words. Beef pie, carrots, cauliflower, gravy. Yum.
Raak - Rosemary foccacio, terrine de campagne, raw fennel.
Raak - I must have been trying to cut down.
penelope - I have a hunger for some proper paté.
Raak - Bray's farm pork pies are the very best.
penelope - Are they Irish pork and dioxin farm pies?
Raak - They insist on only the very best dioxins.
Rosie - One should always insist the dioxins are organic.
Software - Can Flash Gordon really save the financial world?
Mukor - What makes you think he'd be so inclined?
The Soundtrack - Flash! (crash) Ah ah... Saviour of the universe.
penelope - My final week at work... demob happy, wooohoooo!!!!
Sierra Mike - Luck in the Land of Wooden Shoes, penelope.
penelope - Words for the week between Christmas and NY?
Raak - "The December Sales" is their most prominent feature.
Rosie - "All Month's Now Available At Knock Down Price's."
penelope - Free apostrophe every time. Whether 'needed or 'not.
Software - Those free radicle apostrophes seem to get everywhere.
Tuj - So, how is everyone finding the new year?
Raak - I looked down the back of the sofa.
Rosie - The revelations of that practice can be horrific.
penelope - There's a menthol sweetie down the back of mine
Software - Actually, I'm finding the New Year rather chilly.
penelope - It's warmed and wetted up a bit now.
penelope - Boxes, boxes, boxes, boxes, boxes, boxes, boxes, junk.
penelope - Arrived. Semi-unpacked. Jeez, where will it all go?
Chalky - I reckon penelope needs a new dutch name
Phil - "Peneloopij" might provide something like the right pronunciation
peneloopij - Thank you very much. That's just marvellous. Not.
Software - Geen probleem peneloopij, al deel van de dienst.
Fogey - Intrigued newcomer wonders: is this a clique? Click.
penelope - Nah, jump in. Tell us your trivia, Fogey.
Rosie - (Fogey) Welcome, unless you are older than me.
Software - Does that mean elder's are not welcome, Rosie?
Rosie - (Softers) Nor larch's, oak's or baobab's either, chum.
penelope - Does that mean no cricket Ash's this year?
Phil - Hazel yews's birches to remain poplar and spruce?
penelope - That reminds me. I've tree writing to do.
Bigsmith - Oak aye. (This is my first attempt here.)
Rosie - I got sunburnt on a beech in cypress.
Chalky - Rowan a boat on Windermere made me sycamore.
Software - Fir goodness sake, this is getting very silly.
Raak - Ivy privet opinion that it's acacia running joke.
penelope - No snow talk in here. That's a relief.
Rosie - The rain will wash away the heagonal crystals.
Software - The nights are beginning to draw in now.
penelope - Oi! Not from where I'm standing, they're not.
Bob the dog - Are you are removing your winter drawers already?
Rosie - There must be a spring in her step.
Software - I'll have a word with the Windy Miller.
penelope - A Dutch word or an English word, eh?
Software - It doesn't matter. Neither will make much sense.
Knobbly - How about 'wainscot'? English, but with Dutch origins.
Rosie - Wainscot sounds like a place in say, Oxfordshire.
Software - Goodness me! The sun is actually shining today!
Rosie - Furthermore, it is visible from the United Kingdom.
rab - (Except for viewers in Scotland, who don't count)
Rosie - Neither do they in BBC TV weather forecasts.
penelope - BBC weather forecasts show weather in the Netherlands.
Software - Ah yes, but is it any better, pen?
penelope - No, it's usually worse. Probably get more rain.
Fogey - Sublime rhyme, "weather in the Netherlands". Whither Neverland?
penelope - Neverland? Repossessed by the bank, mate. Hard Luck.
penelope - Rain and wind... I have to go out :o(
Software - That's bad luck, the sun is shining here.
Rosie - What? Even for the global tax avoidance mob?
Software - The sun ALWAYS shines for tax avoidance mobs :o)
penelope - But they have to stand in dirty business.
penelope - Are you all currently saving up your words?
Rosie - I am naturally laconic, despite the Cambrian influence.
Software - Every word counts in the current challenging climate.
penelope - I thought words were cheap. What has changed?
Knobbly - A change is as good as a rest
Tuj - Has anyone talked about Twitter in this game?
Knobbly - I don't think so. Should we start now?
penelope - I don't know. Is anyone tweeting us yet?
CdM - Is this game now "Eight Words A Week"?
penelope - Wasn't that an early song by the Beatles?
Software - Did we resolve the Twitter issue at all?
CdM - [Software] Yes.
penelope - I'll Twitter on here. Is anyone actually interested?
Knobbly - By current activity, no-one will even notice, Pen.
Software - Maybe St George will, its his day today.
Tuj - On St. George's Day, I went to France.
Rosie - On St Patrick's Day, America goes to pieces.
Software - On St David's day the Welsh take a leek.
penelope - I made lemon cookies this morning. Utterly delish.
Rosie - I couldn't resist a tasty inverted equilateral triangle.
penelope - Did you have custard on it, Rosie?
Rosie - I was indulging in smart-arse mathematical symbolism.
Software - I See. In France they have Triangle Amande.
penelope - Are these the last eight words here ever?
Tuj - Is the Pope a bear in the woods?
Rosie - What's more, does His Holiness approve of picnics?
Juxtapose - Once upon a time there was this guy.
Rosie - He became station announcer at Bristol Temple Meads.
Raak - He announced the Second Coming, but no-one listened.
nfras - A man walks into a pub, now laugh.
Rosie - He should have looked where he was going.
penelope - [Rosie] Now, and just now, did I laugh.
Rosie - It seems possible to cause mirth on Tuesdays.
Software - Shall we try again tomorrow? It'll be Wednesday.
nfras - Does "it'll" count as one word or two?
Software - It it does we both used nine. Whoooops!
Rosie - Where's the Southeast England Severe Weather Event, then?
Raak - I woke up to rain, was that it?
Knobbly - [nfras] I think contractions've always counted as one...
Rosie - ....thing pregnant women would rather not think about.
Software - Ah, yes, but prevention is better than cure.
penelope - Ten days is too long without eight words.
Software - That's true. Where have you been then, pen?
penelope - Eindhoven, the Neunen watermills that Van Gogh painted.
Software - Shall we continue our discrete dalliance here, pen?
penelope - So discreet, I failed to notice it, sorry.
Software - You really know how to hurt a guy.
penelope - I trained long and hard for it, Softers
Software - So that's why you ended up in Holland!
penelope - Yep, he was the last handsome man standing!
Rosie - I feel disinclined to disturb this tender conversation.
Tuj - [Rosie] You may've shattered the illusion of seclusion.
penelope - Phew, it's not just me and him anymore
Software - If I can't see you, you're not there.
ImNotJohn - Either that, or I'm a master of disguise.
Rosie - It could be dark or foggy. Those polders.
Tuj - "Polder" rhymes with several other words. Like "older".
Knobbly - Coincidentally, I read what a polder is today.
Rosie - Coincidentally? I wonder if that is really true.
Software - So true. But then what is the truth?
Knobbly - [Rosie] As opposed to purposely looking it up?
Rosie - (Knobbly) Er, yes. Maybe I should trust you.
Software - Another week passes by without anyone making comment.
penelope - Perhaps it's the end move for this game.
Rosie - Shall we put it out of its misery?
Knobbly - I think we'll miss it when it's gone.
Software - What to do with these spare eight-word sets?
penelope - Pair them up in a sixteen word set?
Tuj - Melt them down for use in other sentences?
Rosie - Sell them to call centres as Good English.
Software - Eight is too many for call centre operatives.
Tuj - Anyone been watching the tennis? Short discussion mind.
CdM - No. Short enough?
Software - Andy Murray? A loosing Scot, not winning Brit.
penelope - Brit? The word is 'Briton'. Briton! Briton! Briton!
ImNotJohn - Someone else using 'loosing' when they mean 'losing'
Rosie - Perhaps he was adjusting his tight jockstrap. Geddit?
Software - Damn spell checkers. They do not understand me.
CdM - The spellchecker has no problem with "Brit", though. :-)
penelope - The spellchecker is wrong. 'Brit' is an abbreviation.
CdM - Yeah well, Brits always say that. :-)
ImNotJohn - I think CdM is shortchanging us, don't you?
penelope - Too right. We demand ALL our words!
Software - I have still got plenty sets of eight.
Knobbly - If life seems pretty rotten, there's something you've
penelope - Verboten? That seems to fit. Try again, Knobbers.
Software - Another week has passed by; still no progress.
penelope - Not strictly true, Softers. We survived another week.
Rosie - But to what end? We are but transients.
penelope - We eagerly await next week's exciting instalment, Rosie.
Tuj - The Exciting Adventures of Rosie! This week: PERIL!
Rosie - What's the excitement in a misspelt washing powder?
Knobbly - I prefer to use BALD, or sometimes TURF.
Tuj - [Rosie] So, what earth-shattering happenings have outdone that?
nights - Any ideas what to do with a Wednesday?
Phil - Hang onto Wednesday for two days. The weekend!
penelope - Can we bring Wednesday forward by one day?
Software - That would make it Tuesday, would it not?
Rosie - The Germans, calling it mittwoch, would be confused.
penelope - New news. Our ancient canary died this morning.
Software - Oh dear. I don't know what to say.
penelope - A relief really. Poor old thing. Dun Tweeting.
CdM - penelope! Get out of the mine now!!
Rosie - The sad demise of the first web-savvy canary.
penelope - Canary's demise may be due to summat else.
Software - Maybe the canary should have quit smoking sooner.
Tuj - Not a good week for canaries at all.
Rosie - But a much better one for Colchester United.
Tuj - [Rosie] We bask in their reflected glory. Ha!
Software - What can one say about these Essex boys?
Rosie - Use words of one syllable, whatever you do.
penelope - OK. Oh, that's blown it from the off.
Phil - What a shame you got that wrong, pen.
Software - Another month has passed. A month nearer Christmas.
Tuj - [Software] A month further from some of them.
penelope - Distant Christmasses. The present ages, the gifts go. wha?
Knobbly - [pen] I'm confused. Would you care to elucidate?
penelope - [Knobbers] I'm rambling without the right boots on.
Rosie - Shurely there are no mountaineers in The Netherlands?
PaulWay - Is it all right if I play here?
ImNotJohn - Of course, provided you promise to be nice.
penelope - Hi PaulWay. Is it Friday where you are?
CdM - [PaulWay] You should be warned that people disagree about how this game should be played as well*

*More precisely, I come here and behave obnoxiously
Rosie - Well, one person does. Could be two now.
Tuj - ...some half-hearted hyphen discussion too, though hardly contentious!
Software - Have we discussed bracketed comments on here before?
ImNotJohn - Yes, and we decided that they should count.
penelope - Looks like there are revolutionaries in our midst
Phil - Kill them, that's what I say. Kill them!
Rosie - It's Guy Fawkes Day every day in Leicester.
Software - Leicester sounds a bit cheesy to me, though.
Tuj - [Softers] Then it follows that they're communist revolutionaries.
Rosie - Leicester is precisely twice as cheesy as Gloucester.
Software - How do you able to conclude that, Rosie?
Phil - Are you referring to my cheesy humour, Rosie?
ImNotJohn - You need to double Gloucester to make cheese
Tuj - North South East West Hearts Diamonds Clubs Spades
Software - Tuj, what's that got to do with cheese?
Rosie - (Phil, Software) I really meant half as cheesy.
Robin - (Rosie) You should post more caerphilly next time.
Software - Frankly, I really do not give an Edam.
Rosie - Good, because I was only shooting the Bries.
penelope - Remember that marvellous cheese game from aeons ago?
Rosie - Aeons ago? Even I am not that old.
ImNotJohn - I think we'll be the judge of that.
Software - Can I detect a tiny hint of ageism?
Rosie - Ageism is unrealistic. There'll always be an earth.
Software - A good earth is important for electrical safety.
penelope - And critical for good carrots and healthy parsnips.
Software - I've heard of Electric Prunes but never evegetables.
Rosie - And there are battery hens and Steam Nuts.
penelope - Are your battery hens rechargeable? How's it done?
Rosie - Electrodes up the bum. Well, you did ask.
Software - We have slipped from vegetables to torture methods.
Rosie - Not at all. This is but benign revitalisation.
penelope - A bit like stringing beans, or chopping carrots.
penelope - I vote we kill off this dying game.
Software - Do you not have any heart left, pen?
Rosie - I've got some liver, if that's any good.
Tuj - Sausages for dinner tonight, I could spare one.
Software - Personally, I like sweetmeats and all other offal.
penelope - You can have mine, although they're already chewed.
Software - [pen] Shurely you never had your own sweetmeats?
Tuj - Two! Four! Six! Eight! Please do not self-immolate!
Rosie - Why shouldn't I? This room is bloody freezing.
penelope - Because there'll be no-one to poke the fire
Rosie - If I poke the fire I'll be electrocuted.
Tuj - [Rosie] Do you not have a pet, say?
Software - That is cruel unless it's an electric eel.
penelope - Is battery still cruel, even for electric eels?
Rosie - Fish from my local chip shop is battery.
Software - I bet they overcharge for it too, Rosie.
penelope - Fish and chips for tea tonight. Hurrah!
penelope - + 'Yummy'
Rosie - (Softers) Yes, but there is too much anyway.
penelope - Only two more days in Blighty before home.
Software - Does that mean you are going Dutch again?
penelope - Nope. Fish and chips is very, very British.
Software - Well, yet another week has passed us by.
nights - And thus, a new week begins. What fun.
Rosie - Yes, it's Monday, which means Big Band rehearsal. This is getting like Twitter.
nights - HAI GUYS, I'M HAVING A POO! PLEASE RT!
penelope - Oh my. That certainly wasn't what I expected.
Rosie - That's because you're a lady, so I'm told.
nights - I thought that we were being Twitter. Sorry.
penelope - Don't worry nights. Any more bowel movements yet?
Tuj - This game pre-dates Twitter, doesn't it? More, nights?
nights - Nope, I've finished being stupid now. Thank goodness.
Rosie - Bowel movements are one of life's simple pleasures.
nights - A bit like stealing your neighbour's newspaper, apparently.
Rosie - What, the Daily Mail? Associated with bowel movements.
nights - Sorry, was irritated that my Libération was missing.
imNotJohn - That just serves you right, you dangerous pinko!
nights - Mwahahaha! Forward, socialist agenda! Sorry, got too excited.
Tuj - [nights] Goodness me you're excitable! I wonder why...
nights - Perhaps because it's nearly the weekend. Good news.
penelope - Indeed. I'll bake a thousand mince pies tomorrow.
Software - Pen, I believe that a thousand is exaggerating.
penelope - OK, 900 is more accurate. They're hungry here.
Chalky - Baking!? Surely they have M&S in Southern Dutchland?
ImNotJohn - More seriously, can you get Robertson's mincemeat there?
Chalky - [INJ] Bet she makes her own. Goody Two-shoes.
nights - I know. I hate those who out-Christmas Christmas.
Tuj - Bzzzt! First "Christmas" mention. Defcon level two (/eight).
Phil - Mince pies? Yuk! Fruit cake and pudding? Bleaurgh!
penelope - Do you sell more beer at Christmas, Phil??
nights - Christmas beer is really very good here. Mmm.
Rosie - Beer is very good everywhere, except keg stuff.
penelope - But Beer in your keyboard definitely isn't good.
Phil - [penelope] Oh yes, yes, yes, very much so!
Software - I hope there's beer in my Christmas stocking.
penelope - Wouldn't it stick all the chocolate money together?
ImNotJohn - Beer, chocolate and stockings, everything a man wants!
Chalky - Actually INJers - not many women would say no :)
nights - Sounds like a winning Christmas to me, guys.
Software - Is it time to sing Christmas carols yet?
Chalky - [Softers] No no no no no no NO!
Software - Thank goodness for that. I don't like them.
penelope - "While Shepherds Washed Their Socks By Night", anyone?
ImNotJohn - Adeste fideles, laete triumphantes, venite, venite, in Bethlehem
CdM - Shouldn't that be "ad"? Or is that commercializing Christmas?
ImNotJohn - Don't criticise if you can't count to eight.
Rosie - Two, four, six, eight. So CdM is innumerate.
Rosie - *filthy spoons alert* The Whore's Bed Carol swings.
Tuj - CdM's not been playing by the rule throughout.
Software - We cannot put up with this consistent non-conformity.
nights - Certainly not. Some sort of action is needed.
CdM - *looks innocent*
Phil - Oh no you don't, CdM, you treacherous scoundrel!
Rosie - He may have the face of a cherub.
Software - But he has the heart of a devil.
Tuj - Perhaps we could nominate a translator for him?
penelope - Tuj, I think that got lost in translation.
Rosie - Your fluency in Dutch has overwhelmed you, pen.
penelope - Underwhelmed more like. I have another lesson tonight.
Software - From the Windy Miller? What sort of lesson?
penelope - One-to-one proper Dutch lesson, cancelled because of snow.
penelope - It's snowing again. I'm fed up of this.
Tuj - I still love snow! But I don't drive...
Software - Snow? You can keep it. Give me sun.
Chalky - *yawns* Can we talk about something else please?
Tuj - "Able acrobats aren't always adept at aquatic athletics"
ImNotJohn - But belligerent boxers behave better befriended by ballerinas
Phil - Competitive combatant cum chassé-champion combination? Complete cobblers!
penelope - Drawn-out deliberations decide delinquent débutantes' diatribes don't deserve...
Software - Every energetic element easily emits energy each evening.
Knobbly - Five fresh-faced foreign fishermen found Folkestone fairly frightening.
Rosie - Girls giving Greek guys gonorrhea generally go ga-ga.
Software - Happy Helen helps her husband have his honey.
penelope - Incredible ignorance ignites indifference into implied imagined insults.
Rosie - "Japanese jurisprudence justifies jailing Janis Joplin," jokes Jung.
Software - Kindly Kurd Kirsty kissed kinky kipper killer Kelly.
Rosie - Let lovable land-locked little Lesotho lure lager louts.
Software - Moreover, most morniverse members mention many miscellaneous matters.
Chalky - No nay never - Ner ner ne ner ner!
Rosie - Onomatopeia obviously offers one option, only obscuring others.
Tuj - Peter Piper poked people's pets, producing pitiful protestations.
Phil - "Quit Quake quickly?" queried Quentin, queuing quite quietly.
Chalky - Roger Rabbit reckons Rebecca Raccoon's rear requires rogering
Knobbly - "Stop sniffing, Stephanie!" shouted Sister Sally, scowling sternly.
Rosie - The through trains to Taunton tend to tardiness. (Chalky) Ace filth, m'dear.
nights - Umpires' union uniformly unites unemployed umbrella undertakers, unusually. To be fair, U is not one of the easier letters.
Vuj - Victor vaunted valueless Valentine's votives - vainly: Valerie vomited.
Raak - When? Where? Who? What? Why? Women worry wearilessly.
Phil - Xhosan Xavier's xanthous xenogeny, xylographer Xerxes, x-rayed xoloitzcuintles.
Audience - *shouts, screams, generally goes wild for Phil's effort*
Chalky - xoloitzcuintles? What a distracting word! Looks vaguely smutty ;^)
Rosie - Yr ydych yn ysgrifennu yn yr ystafell yma. reveal Someone have a go in English.
penelope - [Rosie] I'll take your word for it. Bravo!
Phil - [Audience] Thank you
[Rosie]"You yellow Yankee!" Yasmin yelled yesterday. Yves yawned.
Raak - "Zounds!" zithered zany Zaza, zeroing Zog's zesty zeal.
Rosie - Well done, Raak, for not mentioning Zinedine Zidane.
Raak - Zizou? I 'ave never 'eard of eem. Zut!
Phil - Alphabet been completely done? Exciting fresh gauntlet heaved! reveal
Chalky - Blair carelessly disseminated equivocal facts garnering headlines internationally. reveal
Rosie - Could dear Elizabeth Fry get herself in jail?
Phil - Does elocution fusspot get huffy in Jamie's kitchen?
Rosie - Ever fancied getting huge implants? Just kidding, love.
Software - Furry gloved hands intend just kindling love, mother.
Phil - Ghastly Harry's in J.K.'s latest magic novel.
Tuj - Having impressively jointed knees lets me navigate outlandishly.
Knobbly - I just knew last Monday's netball outcome. Psychic!
Rosie - Jeremy Kyle legitimises me nodding off pretty quickly.
Phil - King Lear? Midsummer Night? Othello? Please quote regularly.
Rosie - Let Midsomer Norton's older parishioners quit robust sex.
Tuj - My neighbours often peek quietly 'round some trees...
Software - Note our Prince's quirky royal standards, tremendously urbane.
Rosie - Obama's persuasive questioning requires sceptics to uncover venality.
CdM - I just keep laughing, mocking niceties of play, quite regularly scorning to use VIII words
CdM - reveal
penelope - [CdM] Disappointed that you didn't rise to the challenge of the XYZ full house...
Rosie - People quaffing really strong tequila unfortunately vomit woefully.
Software - Quite right. Strong tequila upsets, verified with x-ray.
Tuj - Really sloppily, Tuj uses only four sequential letters.
Rosie - This game has lost its momentum, it seems.
Software - Well, it never really had much forward velocity.
Knobbly - It tends to come and go, in waves.
Rosie - In that respect it seems to resemble desire.
penelope - Desire for carnal conjugation or for something else?
Software - Perhaps for street cars, they have forward velocity.
Rosie - The old Croydon trams had little of that.
Tuj - Are there any famous eight-word quotations out there?
General Sedgewick - "They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist..."
Tuj - By definition that's surely seven and a half ;)
CdM - "Elementary, my dear Watson"
Software - You are four words short, my dear Holmes.
penelope - Would nine words make this game more popular?
Rosie - Twelve and a half percent extra? Who knows?
Software - CdM seems to like it at any length.
Rosie - Having a dirty mind, I'd say that's libellous.
penelope - Due to inflation, every move now has nine words.
Rosie - All right then pen, I'll go along with that.
Knobbly - This introduces a whole new dimension to the game.
penelope - I find it requires a bit of extra thought.
Software - I thought that we were still in a recession.
Rosie - Perhaps we could think our way out of it.
FGZstar - I doubt Gordon Brown'll be around much longer
Software - Why is that, FGZ, are you planning an assassination?
FGZstar - No, Software. Your last move was too long.
Rosie - Au contraire, matey, for nine is the new eight. See above - confusingly, we've got bored with octality.
FGZstar - I graciously concede. Let us all embrace the nonality!
Phil - I don't like it, sir. Not one little bit!
Software - [Phil] Come on man! We must all embrace change.
Rosie - I agree with you entirely. Neuf est tout neuf.
Phil - [Rosie] Moi, je dis huit "Oui"s à huit. Oui?
FGZstar - Please could we revert to English? I'm confused.
Phil - I'd be delighted if we reverted to eight words.
Rosie - I now agree, and here is the proof.
Software - I concede I found nine a bit odd.
penelope - Nine *is* odd. That's the nature of the number!
Rosie - We want nothing to do with perfect squares.
Juxtapose - In botany, "perfect" means both male and female.
Chalky - In human biology, perfect is an impossibility
FGZstar - Well there's perfect, and then there's too perfect.
Rosie - Let us not mention the Footballer's Perfect, then.
Chalky - [Rosie] There's an oxymoron if ever I saw
Rosie - (Chalky) There's blood everywhere if ever I saw.
FGZstar - And so some more blood has been spilt.
Software - This game is starting to resemble a slaughterhouse.
Rosie - He mocks the Morniverse. Off with his head!
Software - I mock it not. Anyway, a bank holiday
Rosie - What we really need is a Bankers' Holocaust.
FGZstar - Is that quite similar to a hung parliament?
penelope - What's the Footballer's Perfect? Can anyone explain it please?
Rosie - "The referee's given a penalty". Should be "gave."
Chalky - Has given = correct. Has gave = incorrect. Rosie = tired? :^)
Rosie - Octoverbal constraints, m'dear. I'd say Chalky = wind-up merchant. :-)
Software - Time for a change of subject I think.
Rosie - Does anybody fancy talking about the World Cup?
penelope - Oh God, not that. Please. Anything but that.
Rosie - I am gratified that your response is so.
Tuj - Good bowling, good tactics, too many South Africans?
Software - Have we stumbled into a different world series?
FGZstar - In Football, New Zealand qualified. Scotland didn't. *sob*
Rosie - I really like football but I've had enough.
FGZstar - I never really liked it to begin with.
Tuj - I'm sports loopy! But I keep quiet here.
Tuj - Mostly I keep everyone else quiet too *sigh*
Gusset Login - That may be true, but does it matter?
Software - Does anything matter? Why are we here anyway?
penelope - We are here to make eight words each.
CdM - Speak for yourself.
Rosie - Oh, don't you start.
FGZstar - Oh not this argument again!
Software - Clearly it is.
Rosie - Come, come, Morniversers and let's stop pissing about.
Tuj - [Rosie] Isn't that exactly what we're here for?
Gusset Login - It might be why you are here, Tuj.
Rosie - We must piss about in an orderly manner.
Software - [Rosie] Surely that is an oxymoron, isn't it?
Rosie - Not necessarily. Think of it as Bounded Chaos.
Gusset Login - Complex, seemingly random conversations that actually have patterns?
Giertrud - Nine has four sides; it's both male and female.
Rosie - Mine has four sides; it is mostly male.
FGZstar - [Rosie] Are you sure that's the right game?
Gusset Login - Does it matter so long as we play?
Software - Yes, let's play the game, no nit picking.
FGZstar - Knit picking is just what I do, though.
KagomeShuko - If you pick nits, it means you remove lice, right?
Rosie - No, you may just choose them. Restoring the 8-word average.
Gusset Login - [Rosie] How do you expect me to choose?
Tuj - Anyone for eight concurrent games of Cheddar Gorge?
penelope - Shall I lead? Dear Sir or Madam; Please
Rosie - find enclosed an affidavit from His Excellency, The
Knobbly - Most Delectable Lord High Milkman of Chesterfield, who
CdM - is
Rosie - currently undergoing treatment for a condition that may (CdM) Predictable.
Software - , under certain circumstances, lead to a considerably worse
FGZstar - state of economic decline in relation to the
Tuj - Milk Marketing Board's recent disastrous adoption of the
Rosie - zloty than even the most zealous and hardline
Software - members of the communist party (North Cheam branch)
Rosie - would have believed possible, and I therefore request
FGZstar - That this game of cheddar be concluded immediately.
Rosie - Well, that was fun, but rather too easy.
Raak - How about eight concurrent games, to end simultaneously?
Software - {Raak] an interesting concept but probably quite tricky.
Raak - Especially if each "row" must also make sense.
Tuj - That's actually what I suggested. Worth a try?
Rosie - Yes. Here goes: There are three different ways
Software - For some people that have strange ideas about
KagomeShuko - Making their way through the narrow supermarket aisles
Tuj - [4]"Beware the tungsten death aardvark," said the man,
KagomeShuko - who was leaning against the stack of pineapples.
Giertrud - brought from the tropics only two days ago
KagomeShuko - seafood from there is not safe to eat
Giertrud - as the oil spill is out of control.
Software - I guess the full stop means it's finished.
Rosie - Shall we continue as before, making frivolous observations?
KagomeShuko - Why don't we start a new consecutive Cheddars?
Giertrud - I think that's a good (but cheesy) idea.
Software - I like cheesy flavoured food, especially real cheese.
KagomeShuko - Spray cans do not have that original taste
Rosie - You are not supposed to eat the can.
Software - Let us start a new topic of conversation.
KagomeShuko - My computer wants to eat my sister, Giertrud.
Giertrud - My sister seems to be sure of this.
penelope - Are you two related? Do you share sisters?
Phil - [penelope] They may not but I do sometimes.
KagomeShuko - Giertrud is my younger, and very weird, sister.
Giertrud - I am playing with my sister's dog, Woofles.
Rosie - Don't forget that the computer is very hungry.
Software - That means the computer wants a Big Mac.
penelope - Stand Back! I'm raiding the office biscuit tin.
Rosie - Feed the ginger nuts to the computer, pen.
penelope - I try, but the mouse gets them first.
Software - Well, pen, what you need is a cat
Rosie - A coarse-furred and fearsome beast called Boris, say.
KagomeShuko - Boris, is that like Bluto from Popeye cartoons?
ImNotJohn - That image is going to stick with me!
Rosie - Bluto was a pussycat really, so to speak.
Software - Yeah, he had to play soft for Olive.
Giertrud - Your olives are soft? Cooked them too long!
KagomeShuko - I think Giertrud started with the double entendres.
Rosie - Today is an august occasion, last of many.
penelope - Don't be so Septemberish. Think of the autumn!
Software - We now have Rs in the month again.
Rosie - Also numbers in Latin. August should be Sexber.
penelope - I'm confused. When would my birthday be then?
Rosie - (pen) January or February? Then Undecember or Duodecember.
KagomeShuko - Today's 90210. Did you watch Beverly Hills?
Knobbly - T'was only 90210 in America... Day first, please!
Software - American's had 9/11, we had 7/7. Avoids confusion.
KagomeShuko - But 7-11 is a convenience store. Free slurpees?
ImNotJohn - 'Slurpees'? Now who is on the double entendres?
Knobbly - Actually, today in Britain it's 8/9/10 - that works.
KagomeShuko - I only know "slurpee" as a cold drink.
imNotJohn - Sounds more like one at body heat (coat!)
Pony - Body heat, 37 degrees, Taraval, Parkside San Francisco
Software - Don't they use Fahrenheit scale in San Fran?
Rosie - Maybe he means cold-blooded creatures such as fish.
Pony - You mean Shion Sono's new movie "Cold Fish"?
Giertrud - >I have never even heard of this movie!
KagomeShuko - I've heard of the movie called "Catfish," though.
Giertrud - Plus, I have also heard of "Big Fish."
penelope - 'Big Fish' are only ever figments of imagination.
Rosie - Yes, my mate never caught a thirty-pound carp.
Software - What's that Rosie? You do nothing but carp.
Rosie - I perch, being a Norwegian Blue, albeit dead.
penelope - I goldfish. That is, I fish for gold.
Spangle - I hake. Hall over. It's the Harthritis. Houch!
Software - I kip, therefore I must be a kipper.
Rosie - I've just had my shoes soled and eeled.
Rosie - I hear sea shanties. Must be someone's Icod.
Software - Speak up, Rosie, my herring's not so good.
Rosie - (Softers) Surely you can still hear the bass.
Software - (Rosie) No, mate, I have a bad cod.
Rosie - Maybe you need the drumming of Max Roach.
KagomeShuko - Ah, Fish puns, fish puns, roly-poly fish puns!
Giertrud - I dolphin-ately am enjoying this bit of luna-sea.
Rosie - Isn't it a great song, Salmon Chanted Evening.
Phil - Another song beckons: Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
I Say, Porter! - [Phil] It's neither the time nor the plaice...
Software - Maybe it's time to get our skates on.
Rosie - I'd better take my mackerel I'll get soaked.
Phil - [Porter!] Even if I'm accompanied by Colin Sell?
Software - Not even John Dory would make any difference.
KagomeShuko - I think Nemo would take offense at these.
penelope - Not even eight words all weekend. Why not?
Software - Perhaps there has been an overtime ban, pen.
penelope - Overtime schmovertime. There's always eight words to spare!
ImNotJohn - Feel free to borrow any of these ones.
Software - Right, I will go for a "feel" then.
Rosie - Good man. Do not bypass the gentlemanly preliminaries.
KagomeShuko - Software, somebody might want to "cop a feel."
Giertrud - Perhaps someone'd also like to feel a cop.
Rosie - Yes, certain people like a bit of helmet.
penelope - Well, I think that can't be capped, Rosie
Software - Could be if it were a welfare benefit.
Rosie - Also if it spouted oil, thus aiding lubrication.
penelope - Or played cricket, rugby or a sitting-down game
Rosie - Or were getting on in years a bit.
Software - You and me, Rosie, but what about others?
penelope - Don't worry. We're getting older all the time.
Spangle - 'There's no turning back' said the forward thinker
KagomeShuko - Stopped clock is right two times a day.
Giertrud - What's the time being we do things for?
Spangle - Has anyone got an idea for a game?
penelope - Pheasant. A very tasty game.
penelope - Oh bugger, mixed up haiku and eight words.
penelope - And too bold, too bold, too bold! Arse.
Knobbly - And there isn't even a haiku game here.
ImNotJohn - Except one with word count: eight, eight, eight
Spangle - This game is very good. Carry on chaps.
Rosie - That would seem to exclude penelope. Won't do.
penelope - *chaps it up with the best of them*
Software - We cannot have sex or gender discrimination here!
ImNotJohn - *wonders about the difference between sex and gender*
Spangle - *gives INJ a lesson on birds and bees*
penelope - Phew. Back to birds. Pheasant, a tasty game.
Phil - Constabulary. Also known as piggery. Full of filthiness.
Phil - Eight word haikus could become quite the thing.
KagomeShuko - Sex and gender are different: Learned in college.
KagomeShuko - Also, would be left out if only chaps.
Spangle - Revisit Phil's words. Consider gauntlet taken. Excellent challenge!
penelope - They taught you sex in college? How worrying!
Raak - They teach each other about sex in college.
Spangle - Forget the sex! Eight word haiku's the thing.
Software - Poetry shmoetry! Give me sex every time, mate.
KagomeShuko - Club called VOX wanted to teach safe sex.
Rosie - Garden waste in Esher is placed in secks.
Software - Now even the Pope is promoting safe sex.
Raak - Garden waste in Escher goes in Klein bottles.
Rosie - (Raak) In Klein bottles? What does that mean? otherwise v good BTW
Felix Klein - A non-orientable surface with no "inner" or "outer" sides.
Felix Klein - Whoops. For a mathematician I'm rubbish at counting.
penelope - [Felix Klein] That makes you a qualified accountant.
Rosie - (pen) Or a member of a musical ensemble.
KagomeShuko - Have an accountant friend: says, "But that's math!"
Giertrud - (Rosie) I like ensembles that sing birthday songs.
penelope - There are, I understand, three kinds of mathematician.
ImNotJohn - No, 10. Those who understand binary / the rest.
penelope - [INJ] Thunder stealing is neither big nor clever, sir!
KagomeShuko - Three kinds of people: Can count, can't count.
Spangle - That's the funniest thing you've said all year.
Software - Well, the year is nearly over, isn't it?
penelope - I hate saving the best until last.
penelope - Snow, snow, snow... when will it ever end?
Giertrud - Snow, of course, ends with the letter W!
KagomeShuko - There's no snow here in Lake Charles, LA!
Software - It has ended here. The sun is shining.
penelope - [Softers] What has ended? The week? The silliness?
Software - [pen] Whatever floats your boat, I would say.
Tuj - The existence of buoyancy has ended? Oh my.
penelope - [Tuj] Aye. Anyone else getting that sinking feeling?
Rosie - If the Netherlands sink any further they'll disappear.
Software - Dam it, that's what I say, dam it.
Giertrud - Know what I say? Leave it to beavers.
KagomeShuko - Which body of water do you want dammed?
penelope - Damn the lot of them. Damn you all!!!!
Rosie - I say, pen, this is most unlike you.
Software - It is probably the stress of seasonal shopping.
penelope - Dutch shops are utterly useless for Christmas shopping.
Software - Yes, after Sinter Klaus they are bought out.
penelope - There was never anything interesting in them anyway!
Rosie - Not even caps? They can always be useful.
KagomeShuko - Too many big box stores in the USA.
Knobbly - Is a 'box store' a cash and carry?
penelope - More like a smash and grab, I think.
KagomeShuko - I think in the UK, they are ASDA?
Giertrud - I would want to get outta ASDA ASAP.
FGZstar - Why? I quite like ADSA. Better than Tesco.
penelope - You ain't seen a Dutch supermarket yet, chaps.
FGZstar - Yes I have. I do quite like Vla.
penelope - It's just cold custard! Gullible, gullible, lemon gullible.
FGZstar - Also comes in chocolate flavoured gullible. Syrup waffles!
penelope - Stroop wafels - yeah, especially fresh and still warm.
Giertrud - Misheard lyrics: Windmill cookies, they'll give you gonorrhea!
KagomeShuko - Uh? Gier? You okay? Stroopwafels - cookies in USA.
penelope - Sometimes, people just don't make senseto me.
CdM - I don't even know what "senseto" means
penelope - Me neither. Any other buggers got any clues?
Raak - sen-se-to: Japanese art of making much with little.
Giertrud - 'Twould be quite different making mulch with little.
penelope - Sen-se-o: Art of pretentious coffeemaking using expensive gadget.
FGZstar - Ooh, Sen-sei: Line from a cancelled Carry-on film.
KagomeShuko - Pen, I thought that had the name Starbucks.
penelope - Not many in this Dutch nation of coffee-drinkers.
Giertrud - Pen, would that be Sterdollar or something similar?
penelope - Doncha know Europe uses Euros, not dollars, Giertrud?
FGZstar - Not all of Europe: Great Britain has pounds.
penelope - I know. I'm British, living in continental Europe.
Phil - You just have to admire the Swiss though
Software - Phil, on what basis do you admire them?
penelope - They roll extremely jammily, whilst yodelling folk songs?
ImNotJohn - They make extremely good knives for their army?
Spangle - Own up - what have you done with Rosie?
FGZstar - She was absolutely delicious served on buttered toast.
penelope - [GGZS] Deffo wasn't you. Rosie is a he.
FGZstar - Ros-he? Well then, who was it I ate?
Rosie - (FGZstar) Not female - not young either. See here.
FGZstar - So merely a confusing choice of name, then.
ImNotJohn - No, perfectly logical when you know his name.
Phil - Re: Swiss - well, there's the Geneva bus system
KagomeShuko - I happen to like the chocolate Swiss rolls.
Giertrud - Well, does the Geneva bus system bus tables?
Knobbly - Does the previous sentence have a word missing?
penelope - No. It uses the American verb 'to bus'.
Rosie - 'Twas an American who said "Verbing weirds nouns."
Rosie - But isn't it an adjective that's been weirded?
Phil - "to bus" is a back formation from "busboy"
Phil - "busboy" itself seems to come from "omnibus boy"
Phil - "omnibus" being Latin for "for everything", of course
Rosie - Ahem, I think in this case "for everybody".
penelope - Latin aside, what else is new and interesting?
Software - Shall we discuss the upcoming Oscars luvvy parade?
Rosie - Only if I can register my supreme indifference.
penelope - No registrations are being taken at this time.
Rosie - Oh, good. That means you can park anywhere.
Giertrud - Even on a cloud up in the sky?
Software - Virtual parking? The government will surely tax it.
Rosie - Croydon Council even taxes virtuous parking, the bastards.
penelope - Gives them something to feel good about, probably.
Rosie - My telescope objective is free from spherical aberration.
penelope - Nice to know. How's your belly for spots?
KagomeShuko - A spot on my belly meant chicken pox.
penelope - Hummmph! Now you've spread contagion into the game!
Software - Coughs and sneezes spread diseases, so they say.
Rosie - There are many agreeable ways of infecting people.
Giertrud - Sharks with laser beams is NOT a method!
KagomeShuko - Sharks with laser beams is from Austin Powers.
Rosie - Sharks with bank accounts are from Austin, Texas
penelope - Pleased to report windy miller much improved today.
Rosie - (pen) Good. May his quixotic pursuits continue unabated.
Software - The sun is shining bright. Well here, anyway.
Rosie - (Softers) Here also. Shows up all the dust.
penelope - Here too. I had to clean the windows.
Rosie - (pen) Did you play your jolly ukulele simultaneously?
penelope - [Rosie] The strings sound funny when they're wet.
Rosie - (pen) They would, like those of pub pianos.
penelope - Eight words for April, anyone? Someone? We're desperate.
Software - How about: where are all the April showers?
Rosie - They are biding their time, menacingly, until summer.
Phil - We've already had at least three of them.
KagomeShuko - A big storm came through Lake Charles, LA.
Giertrud - We need April flannels and April soap, too.
penelope - Time for your spring clean, Giertrud? Have fun!
ImNotJohn - April flannels? Surely it's too early for cricket?
Software - Not at all. Durham was playing on Sunday.
Rosie - Summer comes early to East and West Hartlepool.
penelope - Right. I'm off to work. Happy Friday, folks.
Rosie - Ha! Work. The state pays me not to.
Software - [Rosie] Can't wait, only 1038 days to go.
Rosie - A mere youth. Friday fortnight I'll be 25,000.
penelope - I'm sailing back to Blighty on Wednesday - hurrah!
Software - I'm sailing to France on Friday, hurrah too!
ImNotJohn - [software] Me too. A full wedding avoidance week.
Rosie - As usual during the day, the telly's off.
Software - I will be sipping beer and relaxing, myself.
Giertrud - Oh? Wedding Avoidance? Is someone getting married? (heh!)
penelope - My Union flag will fly in our straat
Software - Unfortunately, even the French television will cover it.
KagomeShuko - Gier, don't act like you are not interested.
Giertrud - You know I'm being sarcastic -- teasing the Brits!
Phil - Brits are notorious for misunderstanding sarcasm...and irony.
penelope - I fail to see the irony in that.
Rosie - As regards sunsets, coppery is better than irony.
Knobbly - Isn't irony what British humour is mostly about?
Rosie - (Knobbly) I assume that is third-order irony.
penelope - Most British humour is lavatorial, isn't it? *snigger*
Rosie - That is why it's gone down the pan.
Software - Right down the pan, just ask Mervyn King.
penelope - I wish I had gone to bed earlier.
Software - pen, where you tired or for another reason?
penelope - Regularly in bed too late, always up early :o(
Rosie - It's been the driest spring since records began. reveal
Software - In Surrey, maybe. In Jersey only number two.
Rosie - Sounds nice; I have always fancied desiccated rock.
Software - Rain at last. Wish it would go away.
nights - Same here. Least the drought warning's been lifted.
penelope - Why can I not stop thinking of doughnuts?
CdM - <mode="Homer">Mmmmmmm... Doughnuts</mode>
penelope - For completeness, please say 'doughnuts' three more times.
CdM - Doughnuts doughnuts doughnuts. Happy now?
KagomeShuko - [CdM], That is not eight words all at once.
Giertrud - I guess New Jersey takes after Old Jersey.
ImNotJohn - CdM doesn't need to count; he's an economist.
Tuj - In this game, CdM's entries just don't count.
Software - New Jersey is much bigger than Old Jersey.
Rosie - Old jersey has probably shrunk in the wash.
penelope - Not just Old Jerseys. My new-ish one shrank.
Rosie - I imagine that would enhance your delightful contours.
CdM - [K] "Eight words all at once." Now are you happy?
nights - I don't know about you, but I am.
penelope - I'm happy enough, for now. No particular reason.
Knobbly - I'm not very happy; but that's my problem.
Tuj - I'm not very happy; but that's my problem.
penelope - Sort it our guys. Whose problem is it?
nights - I don't think it's my problem - no explosions.
ImNotJohn - Pull yourselves together, you miserable bunch of wimps.
Knobbly - That's almost the end of a knock-knock joke.
Rosie - It would seem nights is a flatulence therapist.
penelope - [Knobbers] Happily, there's no end of knock-knock jokes.
nights - Oh, but that I were. Such great fees.
Rosie - Knock, knock. Who's there? A doctor. Doctor who?
CdM - I don't get it.
Knobbly - Does CdM intentionally flout the word count rule?
Rosie - To assume otherwise would be to invoke innumeracy.
nights - And we all know that could prove distastrous.
Rosie - Maybe. But other reasons are even less flattering.
ImNotJohn - CdM believes the market should set the count
penelope - By his reckoning, we would all be short-changed!
KagomeShuko - I just put the definitive answer in "Movies."
KagomeShuko - [CdM], I'm happy, but that's still ten words.
Rosie - I'm not happy, because Rupert Murdoch's still alive.
ImNotJohn - [KS] I'm afraid irach beat you to it
penelope - Yup, time for another eight words before Friday?
Giertrud - A restaurant sign here says 8 is great.
cfm - All I need do is write eight words?
Raak - Only if they are exactly the right words.
Phil - If not, someone might get testy. Or grumpy!
cfm - Where do I find the arbiter of rightness?
KagomeShuko - Oh, well. Maybe my next one'll be good.
CdM - [cfm] Me.
penelope - I hope so, Kaggers. Next time, try harder!
ImNotJohn - If in doubt; try, try, try, try, try again.
Tuj - One, two, miss a few, ninety-nine, one hundred.
cfm - [CdM] I'd like to have eight words with you.
penelope - Play nicely, boys. What plans for het weekend?
Software - Doing not a lot between all the visitors.
ImNotJohn - Get together with Mrs INJ's folks down South
Rosie - Enumerating the definite article in all European languages.
Phil - Barbecue on Sunday perhaps? Two days before birthday :-)
Tuj - Same thing I do every day, Pinky: nothing.
Chalky - [pen] I'll be playing nicely with the boys
nights - Reunion piss-up with old housemates in Bristol area.
penelope - Entertaining new nieces for a day - teenaged twins.
cfm - Wishing Phil a happy birthday, for one thing.
KagomeShuko - [Tuj] I learned that rhyme in middle school.
cfm - In New York, we learned something else entirely.
KagomeShuko - I learned many rhymes while in elhi grades.
Giertrud - Tuj and Kag, I learned it in Kindergarten.
Chalky - GiertKag RudShuko - so not that long ago, eh?
penelope - Last workday before nuptuals. Too much to do!
CdM - If anybody present knows a reason why...
cfm - I used to shoot weddings -- it was fascinating.
penelope - Ceremony takes 10 minutes. Party takes 10 hours.
Software - That seems to be in the right proportion.
penelope - Blissfully short, and in a foreign language. Perfect.
penelope - Finally, summer arrives. It's too bloody hot today.
Botherer - Never fear, penelope. Rain is on its way.
Chalky - And blustery whippy windiness. I do love autumn.
penelope - It's whipping round the 6th floor at 50kph
Botherer - How jolly exciting! Is the wind blowing too?
KagomeShuko - Chalky, I'll take that statement as a compliment.
Giertrud - Whipping? Are we talking cream or sadomasochistic stuff?
penelope - I'm thinking of split cane fly fishing rods.
Tuj - I'm thinking of a word beginning with P.
Knobbly - How long would it take to guess it?
Tuj - Eight times quicker than a one word game.
penelope - Unless no-one posts because they despise your efforts...
KagomeShuko - Possibly picturesque paintings put pretty pictures 'pon pillars?
penelope - Perch, Pig, Pony, Pygmy, Pike, Polyp, Percheron, Peacock?
Botherer - Plump pears, perchance per pound, perhaps per person?
Tuj - If those are guesses, no. Is this fun!?
penelope - Perfectly pleasant. Pie, profiteroles, pastries or potted pork?
Tuj - No, but you're travelling in an appropriate direction!
penelope - Patisserie or pork products? I give up peeing.
Tuj - [pen] Animals then edibles. The answer was "prawn".
penelope - When is it lunch time? I'm hungry now.
Software - I have already had my lunch, so there.
penelope - Is the weekend over? But I'm not ready!
Giertrud - Worry not, [pen], another will be approaching soon.
KagomeShuko - Can another weekend come before the new week?
penelope - Six days to write a 90 minute speech.
Raak - Does anyone listen to a 90 minute speech?
penelope - They must, if they want the cocktails afterwards.
Tuj - Fifteen minutes a day, no problem right pen?
penelope - You're forgetting umpteen re-drafts and bloody research, Tuj. -How am I supposed to know what he wants to say? I'm only the writer!!
KagomeShuko - Pen, ghostwriting is no fun. I know first-hand!
Phil - I was best man for groom I barely knew.
Phil - My speech was generic: "One speech fits all"
penelope - "Laydeees and Gennelmen, Eye thengyew fur turning up!"
penelope - Tuesdays are my Mondays. First day at office.
penelope - Seven days, but not even eight words. Shameful.
Knobbly - Seems as if no-one has anything to say.
Tuj - I'm baffled this game has lasted five years.
Phil - One, two, three, four, five years? Nice work!
KagomeShuko - Did you know "Bewildered" does not mean "Astonished?"
Giertrud - You're baffled? You've got things blocking you off?
Botherer - I assumed "Bewildered" was a synonym for "Confounded".
nights - Gosh, I do love this game. Don't you?
CdM - No.
Software - CdM has a thing about following the rules.
CdM - I can follow them if I want to. Really.
Raak - CdM follows the rule of not following rules.
Tuj - [Raak] Reverse psychology? Worth a try, I guess!
Giertrud - Happy Guy Fawke's Day As Well As Night.
nights - Guy Fawkes is one thing I really miss.
Tuj - When do they set off fireworks over there?
Rosie - Every bloody night, according to Dr Qu+xum (ret'd)
ImNotJohn - A really big bonfire at Taunton this year.
ImNotJohn - Yes, that's my coat. Why do you ask?
penelope - Can I borrow it? I need to swear.
Rosie - I rarely need to swear, but do anyway.
penelope - Swearing is clinically proven to make things better.
CdM - F*ck yeah!
Rosie - Well, why don't you do it properly, then?
CdM - [Rosie] Because some here are monitored by netnannies
CdM - Damn it! That was eight words, wasn't it?
penelope - Everyone conforms to the norm, sooner or later.
Norm - Sorry? Pardon? What? Was someone talking about me?
Rosie - Are you the Norm or any old Norm?
Software - Is there any such thing as the norm?
penelope - Not this Saturday, nope. Everything pleasingly abnormal today.
Abby Normal - Who? Me? What? Are you talking about me?
KagomeShuko - My sister is one more abnormal year older.
Giertrud - On the 25th, I turned 28, quite normally.
penelope, - Normally? No! You change age every year surely!
Rosie - Perceived time is a logarithmic function of age.
KagomeShuko - Do we need to discuss Einstein's Relativity Theory?
Rosie - We certainly do, because everyone's a neutrino nowadays.
ImNotJohn - I'm not. I travel much slower than light.
penelope - I rarely get home before dark these days.
Rosie - (pen) There's something of the night about you.
penelope - Maybe. Monday morning, good intentions, still in pyjamas.
penelope - It's too bloody early. Way too bloody early.
ImNotJohn - Went out and bought my Christmas tree today
penelope - So how was Tuesday for everyone? Dull here.
Rosie - Like uncooked baked beans, cold and rather windy.
penelope - Nearly the shortest day. First; the longest night.
penelope - Now, please let's have some lights on, eh?
KagomeShuko - Beans must be eaten before the wind happens.
Giertrud - Bean emitting gusts shall be returned to Tesco's.
Merlyn - Beans, Beans, The musical Fruit [to be continued]
Rosie - The more you eat, the more you toot.
Tuj - The more you toot, the better you feel...
KagomeShuko - We should have beans for all our meals!
penelope - Agree. I had beans on toast for breakfast.
ImNotJohn - Walked in in daylight; first time this year
ImNotJohn - First time for daylight, I mean; not walking.
KagomeShuko - I thought you learned to walk each year.
Giertrud - I'd be more amazed if you could fly.
penelope - I can fly, but I choose not to.
Phil - There is an art, or knack, to flying.
Raak - You can learn it from "Teach Yourself Flying".
penelope - Hold book, flap at the same time? Impossible!
Tuj - Perhaps the book's flaps act like stabilisers. Beginning...
Phil - Just throw yourself earthwards, and then miss.
CdM - I gave my views on this topic here but I needed 42 more words than are approved in this game.
Darren - Does it count if you fail to land?
penelope - Are you hovering mid-air, waiting for the answer?
Software - I am up in the air over levitation.
Phil - I once taught flying in a vivid dream.
Giertrud - Are you sure it was just a dream?
KagomeShuko - True or False? Dillon - one fifty-eighth of second.
Phil - False. False, false, false, false, false! Flippin' false!
Software - You don't know how true that is, Phil.
penelope - Pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake; one more pancake? Nope.
ImNotJohn - At half-time the Up'ards are leading one nil
ImNotJohn - Down'ards made it one all on day two
Botherer - Mid'ards stole the ball, reducing things to farce.
Software - Well, that is leap day almost done with.
Botherer - So now it's March. Spring is almost here!
penelope - Where is 'here?'? No sign of it yet.
Software - Here is where I am- on the rock.
Raak - I've found an old ha'penny in my change.
Software - It's probably worth more than the 2p substitution.
KagomeShuko - Are you going to wear green this Saturday?
Giertrud - There's no sign of here yet? Then where?
Phil - I shall be wearing red, for rugby reasons.
Software - I shall be drinking Guinness for obvious reasons.
penelope - Timne for eight words? Or time to stop?
Phil - I'm sure I can think of eight words
CdM - Me too! But I won't.
Tuj - Can we use CdM's self-appointed privileges for good?
CdM - Mwaahahahahahahahahahaha!!
Software - Ah ha! CdM ever the maverick, I see.
penelope - Attention-seeker, more like. Just ignore him for now.
Phil - Ignore who? Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
ImNotJohn - Remember rule of thumb: don't feed the troll
Tuj - How will we get to cross the bridge?
penelope - We're back on. That's all right then, chaps.
Software - Back from my trip to Bristol, in fact.
penelope - 'Back from Bristol' - is that a euphemism, Softers?
Software - Take it as it comes. It's not plural.
penelope - Spicy parsnip and cheese puffs. Cook or not?
Boolbar - Just drink the wine and cooking be damned!
CdM - Grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading






Grading
ImNotJohn - How is your new roadmaking job going, CdM?
Phil - Gradely (a word that comes from Old Norse).
Software - Time for a nice cup of tea, methinks.
Tuj - Went to Lord's for first time today. Terrific.
penelope - Might 'do' Madrid in November. Any recommendations, folks?
Chalkster - Wow -- haven't been in here for AGES. Remind me. What are the rules?
Phil - Not sure. I think CdM nicked the rulebook.
penelope - Used the pages to write shopping lists, probably.
Rosie - I use cut-up tea cartons for shopping lists. That should kill it stone dead for another week.
Boolbar - I list to one side when out shopping.
penelope - I tend to get very lost in shipping.
Chalky - My BlueAnchor Bay friend superscopes Bristol Channel ships :)
nights - I've rather missed all this. I think. Anyway.
Boolbar - What can I do with these seven spaces?
penelope - Fill them with Dwarves. Or Sins. Or Wonders.
Tuj - I'd suggest hangman, but that's already occurring elsewhere.
Software - The weather is getting drier or I'm mistaken.
ImNotJohn - Yes, that's very true; you are indeed mistaken
Botherer - I'm mistaken for someone I'm not most days.
Boolbar - [Botherer] Nice to see you here Prince Charles!
penelope - Listening to French radio sometimes helps. Wonder why?
Software - [pen] I have no idea. My it's hot!
nights - French radio is generally rubbish, except for FIP.
Rosie - (Softers) What's your it and why's it hot?
penelope - A propos nowt, when is it home time?
nights - Soon. Very soon. At least I hope so.
Software - Well, another month already. Autumn is nearly here.
penelope - Not quite yet. The weekend was a scorcher.
penelope - One week later. And only I speak. Why?
gil - 'Cos you're a bit of a chatterbox, Pen.
Rosie - Is there anyone here who fancies Nigella Lawson?
Phil - Not obsessively, Rosie. She is quite attractive though.
gil - She has a sort of louche appeal.
Rosie - She fancies herself too much for my taste.
Boolbar - Nigella! *daydreams for a while*   No, not me.
Phil - The mental image of her father is off-putting!
Giertrud - Thou shalt not have fantasies about Nigella's father!
Software - She is far too sugary in my opinion.
Giertrud - Sugary? Do you mean Nigella or her father?
Rosie - Her Dad's a climate sceptic and therefore bonkers.
CdM - [Rosie] Are you sure that you don't have that backwards?
Rosie - (CdM) It's quite plausible that he's bonkers a priori.
Rosie - His name, anagramatically, is We all sign on.
Phil - That reminds me of Bob Monkhouse on HIGNFY.
Boolbar - I am not sure about making amusing anagrams.
Rosie - Are you concerned with the propriety of it?
penelope - My hair is now fifty shades of grey.
Botherer - [pen] Hair dye makes it fifty shades darker.
Rosie - Then why doesn't it work on my beard?
Giertrud - It is hair dye, it's not BEARD dye.
Rosie - I am told that you can't dye beards.
penelope - No-one told Billy Connolly that. His was pink.
Botherer - [pen] That's true, but what about his beard?
Rosie - Are you challenging Phil as top filth merchant?
Boolbar - I do not want filth. Family phrases accepted. reveal
Phil - I have no idea whence this reputation came.
Rosie - Acrophil sounds like a top man to me.
Botherer - Apologies, but when they pop up, I'm obliged.
Boolbar - November. Not a good month for eight words?
penelope - January, February, March, April, May, June, July, Aug-Oh.
Phil - I only know seven words, including these words.
Boolbar - [Phil] No wonder you keep losing at Scrabble.
penelope - I'm the one who always loses at Scrabble.
Boolbar - [pen] You might be having a bad spell.
Phil - Only seven words I know. These seven only.
Software - At least there is a bit of variety.
CdM - Looks like six to me, Phil.
Phil - Seven! Including these seven, I know seven words!
Rosie - But do you know what they mean, severally?
Phil - These seven words? Only I know, I know.
penelope - I only know I've been to the dentist.
Boolbar - I guess you know the drill by now.
Phil - Thankfully, I have learnt more words. Another six.
Rosie - Are they in English, Welsh, Hungarian or Basque?
penelope - Two free lunches this week for me. Hurrah!
Boolbar - No free lunches for me though. Boo! Hiss!
Phil - [Rosie] Yes, they're English, Welsh, Hungarian or Basque.
Software - Basque? Isn't that a piece of female underwear?
Botherer - I thought it was a French lobster soup.
penelope - "Helleau. Je suis un Freynch lobsterrrre from Normandie!"
CdM - I thought it was the Spanish football coach.
Rosie - Are you calling pen a charabanc? How ungentlemanly!
penelope - He's frighteningly accurate - I have so much seat!
Tuj - Did CdM just play eight words, as requested?
CdM - When eight is appropriate, that's what I use. Usually.
Boolbar - Fashion experts say nine is the new eight.
penelope - That's just word game inflation. Resist it!
Phil - It's Friday, Friday. Gotta get down on Friday.
Software - Steady on, Phil, have you asked the wife?
Phil - Who do you take me for? Robinson Crusoe?
Rosie - It's good to see the philth is undiminished.
penelope - We'll need another eight words - about Christmas - soon.
Phil - Oh how I hope my wages are in.
Software - Merry Christmas to all in the Morniverse today.
Boolbar - Bah! Humbug! But mince pies are rather nice.
penelope - More cheese, vicar? Don't mind if I do!
Giertrud - I hope that everyone had a Merry Christmas!
Rosie - I shattered the peace with carols on trombone.
penelope - Tromboneronial carols sound fun. I ate too much.
Software - I did not drink enough in my opinion.
Phil - I never drink enough at Christmas. Blasted family!
penelope - Drinking it and topping up bottles with water?
Phil - Awkward being the only drinker in the house.
Rosie - I made a very alcoholic Christmas Pud sauce.
penelope - Was it just a glass of neat brandy?
Rosie - More like half a bottle and some flour.
Software - Why waste brandy by adding flour, I ask?
Raak - Otherwise it would just fall off the fork.
Rosie - There was also sugar and butter. Tremendously nutritious.
penelope - Surely a spoon is the implement for puddingisationalists?
Tuj - Softers might be going in with a straw!
Boolbar - Custard. That is all I have to say.
penelope - Which toothpaste for mains and which for dessert?
Phil - I hate most toothpaste. Stupid horrible minty vileness.
Rosie - Toothpaste is a very good trombone slide lubricant.
Boolbar - Does it keep the trombone in mint condition?
Rosie - That is one of the better trombone jokes.
Software - Tits pecking at my nuts in the garden.
penelope - What has that got to do with trombones?
Phil - Trombone: a Swanee Whistle with delusions of grandeur.
Rosie - Just-a one-a cornetto; one too many, I'd say.
Software - Sorry, pen, didn't realize that trombones were compulsory.
Boolbar - Robot Men! Rob me not or entomb trombone.
Rosie - The trombone makes a very good water pistol.
Rosie - In any case I'm better at the piano.
penelope - Aiming a piano is harder than aiming trombones.
Phil - Seventy-six trombones. Hundred-and-ten cornets. I rest my case.
Tuj - I thought there was just one cornet. Oh!
Rosie - (Tuj) There is, as I said on Tuesday.
Penelope - Good grief. My iPad works in the loo.
Rosie - Not only that but you've acquired a capital.
penelope - I was enthroned at the time. Quite appropriate.
Rosie - Yes, even Her Maj must have a crap. V good, BTW.
penelope - Anyone got owt interesting to say about February?
Boolbar - February : Rub Faery. Be a furry. Bear fury.
Phil - Best month: sort of has "brewery" in it.
Software - Even better, it has my birthday in it.
Rosie - You still won't be as old as me.
penelope - What happened to that Twix I just bought?
Raak - I had traffic jam at breakfast this morning.
Raak - Strawberry, apricot, and gooseberry, layered in the jar.
Rosie - I find "pen's Twix" very difficult to enunciate.
penelope - What a murky February day. Not much fun.
Software - Yes, it is even trying to snow here.
Botherer - New Year's Resolution not to drink remains intact.
Rosie - You must be extremely dehydrated. Saves weeing, though.
penelope - I'll watch the windy miller teach weather tonight.
penelope - I spent most of today doing the ironing.
Phil - Yesterday, I watched "O Brother, Where Art Thou?"
NotJohn - Yesterday I painted walls and ceiling - 2 coats
Rosie - Two coats? Turn the heating up a bit.
penelope - Dutch reflexive verbs in the 'past perfectum' - aaaargh.
Rosie - I shall counter that with - "Welsh prepositional mutations".
penelope - It's either too many or too few vowels.
Phil - Ancient Greek: Aorist tense. Middle voice. Such fun!
Rosie - (pen) Actually it's all to do with consonants.
penelope - Have just eaten proper, tangy, British cheddar. Delish.
Rosie - How can cheese be like a mathematical operator?
penelope - I don't know. How can it, Rosie? (joke?)
Knobbly - Hello folks, I still exist. That's all really.
Rosie - Del is a mathematical operator, among other things.
Software - "Number please?" Is that what you allude to?
kagomeshuko - Even the cheese is holey like a zero.
Giertrud - Will this holey cheese freeze at zero degrees?
Botherer - Zero is just an eight in a belt.
Rosie - Haven't you got that precisely arse about face?
penelope - Finally have spring weather, which means April showers.
kagomeshuko - It seems our spring skipped the year again.
Phil - I have discovered the delights of lunchtime hiking.
penelope - I have discovered the delights of lunchtime lunching.
Chalky - I have discovered lunches with some delightful hikers.
penelope - I have delighted some hikers with lunchtime discoveries.
Raak - I've lunched on hikers and discovered they're delightful.
Software - My local café has hiked its delightful lunches.
penelope - Anyone got eight lovely words for May? Anyone?
Rosie - My aunt's middle name was May. Florence May.
NotJohn - Berry, blossom, bug, day, fair, flower, fly, pole
Phil - "May the force be with you." Too geeky?
penelope - May the Tenth... for lisping campers. (Stolen joke)
penelope - Friday post. Three-day Whitsun weekend for cloggies. Hoera!
NotJohn - There was a hoopoe in my garden yesterday
penelope - I can't beat that. Saw cranes yesterday though.
Phil - Red kites for me yesterday. Yet again. Boring!
Phil - Saw peregrines at Lincoln Cathedral today, via webcam.
NotJohn - Today I handed in my notice at work
CdM - [NJ] Congratulations!
penelope - [INJ] Bold step. What's next, young man? (Apart from making up for other's shortfalls)
NotJohn - [Pen] 'Young man'!? - I'm taking (slightly) early retirement.
penelope - Needed eight words. 'Sir', too formal. 'Old', rude.
NotJohn - Hoopoe confirmed as 35th ever sighting in Derbyshire
Phil - 35th ever bird in Derbyshire? That many? Really?
CdM - What exactly constitutes an individual sighting? Serious question.
Rosie - Oh, come on, you never ask serious questions. :-)
NotJohn - [CdM] Too complex for here - see banter page.
Tuj - [CdM] So serious it warranted precisely eight words!
CdM - I'll use eight words if the occasion demands. If.
penelope - Eight words is easy for others. Not you?
Phil - I bet CdM thinks he's really cool.
Tuj - What're the most famous eight words in history?
penelope - We will fight them on the beaches. Yeah.
Rosie - Were you a mod or a rocker, pen?
CdM - "To be or not to be? That is"
penelope - Body: woman (meek, feeble); stomach: man (hairy, beer)
kagomeshuko - Four score and seven years ago our forefathers
Giertrud - Let them eat cake, cake, and more cake.
Phil - In the beginning were the Words. Eight Words.
Chalky - The moment one learns English, complications set in.
Rosie - Please don't say that to a foreign doctor.
Chalky - Much have I travelled in the realms of gold
penelope - He would say that, wouldn't he, your honour?
Rosie - Mandy Rice-Davies is not quite your type, pen.
Raak - Legitimate travelling, or just Bermuda tax domiciling days?
penelope - Monday... Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. Then... Saturday, Sunday!
kagomeshuko - Sometimes the weekend should last all week long.
Giertrud - Like each move here's eight words - Eight Days!
penelope - OK, done Friday morning. Next: attack Friday afternoon!
nights - Miles and miles and miles of boxes. Help.
Giertrud - Shall I add yet another mile of boxes?
KagomeShuko - You need some ribbons and bows for them.
nights - Please, God, no. I can't find anything anymore.
penelope - Situation critical. Citronella candle keeps going out. Mozzieeessssssss...
Rosie - Are the mozzies weeing on it or sunnink?
penelope - Kamikazi mozzies dive-bombing the guttering flame..... what larks!
Rosie - I wonder what proportion survive this suicidal megathermality.
nights - Is anyone else watching the tennis? No? OK.
Tuj - Well actually, I was. I watch much sport.
nights - The people here are turning themselves inside out.
Tuj - Inside out and falling through ceilings? Sounds dangerous!
nights - What can I say? My workplace is exciting.
KagomeShuko - Catnip oil keeps mozzies away from your skin.
Raak - Isn't catnip oil a Potion of Summoning Felines?
Chalky - Let's treat this game to some July posts.
Phil - Bright sunshine plus "dress down Friday" equals shorts :)
KagomeShuko - The heat makes me feel like I'm melting.
nights - Here, casual Friday usually means wearing no tie.
Rosie - Can you get away with wearing no pants?
nights - Ask me again on Friday evening, we'll see.
KagomeShuko - Do Brits still use "trousers," rather than "pants?"
penelope - Yes. And we're always 'Britons', not Brits. Ithengyew.
Phil - Many of us use both. Trousers over pants.
CdM - Actually, some of us are Brits. But don't tell pen.
Chalky - Pants are more often undergarments for both sexes.
penelope - According to the OED, it's a young herring.
penelope - And Brit meaning 'Briton' is third definition down
penelope - Reminds me of NOTW and The Sun so...
penelope - never use it about myself. Awful ugly abbreviation!
Phil - Britons were displaced by Anglo-Saxons. How about Britisher?
Chalky - [Phil - Bless you!] My shiny new grand-daughter sneezed fifteen times yesterday.
penelope - [Chalks] That's almost a whole years-worth in one go.
Software - My shiny new grand-daughter is in New Zealand.
Chalky - [Software] That's about as far as possible from Jersey.
penelope - Six drafts. Now number seven gets underway.
Rosie - 6 drafts? You'r quite a boozer, aren't you?
nights - There's no-one that can drink like our Pen.
penelope - If only it was as nice as beer.
Rosie - Beer absorbed rapidly tonight thanks to prior dehydration.
KagomeShuko - I am guessing you don't need a humidifier.
Giertrud - A toilet might be a good thing though.
Chalky - Let's treat this game to some August posts.
Raak - Eheu fugaces labuntur anni! Is that august enough?
Chalky - Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose
Rosie - I Fort Augustus was a town in Scotland.
Software - Another day. Another eight words. C'est la vie.
Phil - Wedding anniversary tomorrow. Must remember to visit shop.
Rosie - Why not try a restaurant? Far more congenial.
penelope - Dinner, washing-up, then out for coffee and dessert.
Chalky - That strange foreign custom - going out for afters
penelope - Because it's so expensive to eat out here!
Chalky - [pen] My french relations do pud and coffee out
penelope - Makes sense. Low-fat, low-cal firsts, sweet indulgent afters!
penelope - Who's going to give the next eight words?
Rosie - I solemnly predict that it will be Rosie.
penelope - Right. But then immediately wrong again. Tough luck.
Rosie - One simply cannot win against this fiendish wench.
Tuj - More predictions: how many words in CdM's next?
Tuj - And when the next comment about infrequent commenting?
penelope - No-one knows all the answers. How can they?
Rosie - They simply bribe the examiners with propelling pencils.
penelope - Oh Wednesday, Thursday Friday, hurry the fuck up.
Rosie - So, shagging only at the weekend, is it?
penelope - No, dear Rosie. I'm sick of being office-bound!
Software - Better than being egg bound one might suppose.
penelope - Monday morning office-bound after a weekend outdoors. Ugh.
Rosie - Life has a predictable cyclic quality, eh, pen?
penelope - Certainly does. But no cake today. Cycle fail. :o(
penelope - Cake today, I've been promised. My favourite word.
Software - Cake is nice but I prefer the cheeseboard.
penelope - Had a nice Ardennais cheeseboard last weekend. Tasty.
Rosie - You will never make a convincing xylophage, pen.
penelope - And you are getting better at pedantry, Rosie! :oP
Rosie - I think pedantry is a bit cheesy, frankly.
penelope - I don't have eight words to spare today.
Software - Neither do I. What a very spooky coincidence.
Rosie - I've got plenty but I'm a stingy bugger.
penelope - Garden centre has Christmas grotto open. Bah humbug.
penelope - I'm full of fish, chips and walnut whips.
Software - Fish have scales, therefore a well balanced diet.
Rosie - Maps have scales and therefore play the piano.
penelope - Logic dictates that maps show rights of weigh.
Rosie - But do they show the rights of Kurds?
penelope - Back to England on Thursday. Overnight ferry again.
Phil - You do spend lots of time on ferries.
penelope - Concerts, birthdays, etc. And it keeps me sane.
Giertrud - Today is my birthday, anniversary of my birth.
Rosie - The North Sea is not all bad, pen.
penelope - Back on t'other side of t'North Sea. Raining.
penelope - Is it time to call this a day?
Software - Perhaps, But what would would fill the slot?
Rosie - This in itself is a source of discussion.
Phil - Perhaps something with a different number of words?
penelope - Any other integer would feel... not quite right.
Phil - Perhaps it should not be an integer then.
Rosie - I'm afraid there's really no answer to that.
Phil - "I'm" and "there's" : one point five words each?
Giertrud - Maybe we should play the game in hexadecimal.
Rosie - Yes, let's. I would only be forty-seven.
Phil - And I've got two years till I'm thirty!
Software - Phil, why is your nose growing so long?
Phil - Noses run in our family, I've been told.
Rosie - You should all try and be more phlegmatic.
KagomeShuko - My finals are over for the semester. Hooray!
penelope - My husband is doing housework. I am redundant.
Giertrud - Maybe you could go and take his job.
penelope - I'm on a cross-channel ferry. *waves waves waves*
Giertrud - Merry Christmas to all. I repeat, Merry Christmas!
Raak - Maxed out iMac. My Christmas present to me.
Phil - From me to me: Trinidad and Tobago Rum.
penelope - Windy miller got me an iPhone. Big surprise.
KagomeShuko - A giant purple rhinoceros occupies my living room.
penelope - [KS] Is it still there? Are you coping?
Giertrud - It rode home with me on my trike.
Rosie - It must be on tricyclics then. Bad news.
Software - Well, the New Year is here, same crap.
Rosie - Yes, my bowel movements continue to be satisfactory.
KagomeShuko - Said rhinoceros has not moved. I'm okay, though.
Rosie - Well, that's good news. What are you on?
penelope - Planet Earth, as far as I can tell.
Phil - My word, what a cold morning it is.
penelope - Still a bit light - and 17.22! No, 17.23!
Rosie - No such luck for us here on GMT.
penelope - By Valentine's Day it's still light at 5pm.
penelope - That's at yours, not at mine. We're later.
KagomeShuko - It gets dark at 6pm here right now.
penelope - Where's 'here'? Further south than here, I'll wager.
Rosie - Where's 'here'? Further north than here, I'll wager. reveal
penelope - Correct. I'm at 51.9308°N-4.4792°E and four floors up.
Phil - I'm between you. 51.516094N, -1.2460551E, on first floor.
Rosie - Four floors up, pen? Just about sea-level then.
Rosie - (Phil) The OS places that in a field.
Phil - [Rosie] Not on my map it doesn't, matey.
Software - [Phil] I think it does with pen's coordinates.
Rosie - (Phil) My OS co-ordinate converter is out of date.
Phil - [Rosie] 3.069km, bearing 95°21′18″ from work to home
Rosie - (Phil) Parsonage Green, then? That looks quite nice.
Rosie - 51.31905N, -0.06190E. Points to right house, wrong address.
Phil - Hmmmmm, my directions weren't quite accurate enough apparently.
Rosie - (Phil) Aldworth, then. An error on my part.
penelope - Weekend! Rain now, clearing later, I've been promised.
Phil - [Rosie] Correct. Great pub. No mobile phone signal.
penelope - I have used a lot of goes recently.
Rosie - (pen) An infinite source, like that of rain.
penelope - [Rosie] I'm beginning to believe that you're right.
Phil - I appear to have absolutely nothing to add.
Rosie - Take it way, Phil, or perhaps multiply it.
Phil - Now? I was waiting for the division bell.
penelope - I've spilt tea down my shirt already today.
Rosie - Another fence panel down. It can stay down.
penelope - Has it got back up again yet, Rosie?
Rosie - I asked it nicely and up it leapt.
Phil - Would that everything rose so readily these days.
Rosie - With the exception of ground water, of course. not a sentence....
penelope - Not a sentence, but a grammatically correct retort.
Software - Now we are in March; how time flies.
Rosie - Now we are in March there is frost.
penelope - What's for dinner tonight? I have no idea.
Rosie - I'll be having fish from Barton-on-Humber.
penelope - I had fish from Ikea. Flat packed flatfish.
Rosie - A screwdriver rather than a knife and fork?
penelope - FOG! What say you about the fog, Rosie?
Software - Fog here stops planes, newspapers and the mail.
Rosie - The Clean Air Act (1956) has ruined fogs.
penelope - Back in the mists of time. Remember then?
penelope - The last move was a week ago. Blimey.
penelope - Since then I've been to England and back.
Phil - I've been to Oxfordshire and back many times.
penelope - Isn't Oxfordshire at the bottom of your garden?
Phil - A little further. Two miles down the lane.
Rosie - It's cruel that Berkshire is now so truncated.
Neophyte - True, "Berks" is ugly; it needs its "shire".
Phil - I'm definitely in the "shire" part. Hobbits ahoy!
Rosie - Lost most of itself to Oxfordshire, I meant.
Phil - Just the Vale of the White Horse, really.
Software - I used to live in Wiltshire, next county.
penelope - So did I. In 1997-1998. Happy days. *sigh*
Chalky - I'm still in Wiltshire. Sometimes, however, I move.
Software - Some of my children are true Moonrakers, consequently.
penelope - I've eaten my own weight in strawberries today.
Rosie - Is that a, er, very large quantity, pen?
penelope - Several acre's worth, so you could say so.
Software - It is my daughter's and son's birthday today.
Raak - Twins? Or by coincidence exactly N years apart?
Software - The latter. A bone of contention ever more.
Phil - I have nothing useful to say right now.
penelope - At least you prevented another boring monologue, Phil.
Software - Easter is nearly upon us. Lovely chocolate eggs.
Rosie - Mmm! yes, but school hall closed- no Band.
Phil - "Four days off" makes me a happy bunny
penelope - 'Five days off in England' - I'm happier still.
Phil - My four will be in England too, pen.
Software - Rosie and I have every day off - retired!
Rosie - Easter Sunday may well have some shitty weather.
Phil - I might mow the cricket pitch on Saturday.
penelope - Good Friday. So much to do. More tea.
Juxtapose - Still waiting for a call back. Freaking out.
Juxtapose - They emailed instead, and the news was good. =)
Phil - Farmer is mowing cricket pitch. Four hours saved!
penelope - I bet Phil's ruddy grass has grown again.
Phil - I noted such growth with disappointment last evening.
penelope - We don't have lawn. I dust the gravel.
Rosie - I never water the grass - makes it grow.
Chalky - Juxtapose - nice :) My garden has a wooden floor.
Phil - Ten days' growth. Still not mowed the lawn.
penelope - [Phil] About time you had a shave though.
Software - Well, another Bank Holiday but not for penelope.
Penelope - Ah, we had Liberation Day instead. Day off.
Rosie - Is it Libation Day for the boozy Dutch?
penelope - Are the Dutch bigger tipplers than other Europeans?
Rosie - Traditionally, it is what gives them Dutch Courage.
Rosie - The moon has risen above the trees yonder.
penelope - Nice. I watched stars and bats last night.
Software - Stars and Bats? Is that a reality show?
Rosie - Hot. 25 in the grounds of Plas Huws.
penelope - Truck fire in motorway tunnel on route home.
penelope - Bugger Bugger Bugger Bugger Bugger Bugger Bugger Bugger
Phil - Got stuck behind tractor. Eight minute commute today.
penelope - It took me two hours to drive home.
penelope - Last night, only took 1 hour 10 mins
penelope - Driving to work this morning: 25 mins. Gutted.
Phil - Six minutes almost every day. Including this one.
Rosie - What is this "work" of which everyone speaks?
KagomeShuko - I have this thing that is called "school."
penelope - I have this horrible thing called 'being workshy'
penelope - Another eight words for Friday? Can't be bothered.
Phil - First and last day at work this week.
blamelewis - I have started a new game at MCiOS
blamelewis - It's work themed, lest that seem a non-sequitur.
penelope - Catching the Blighty-bound ferry tomorrow evening, hurrah hurrah!
Rosie - Let us all tap our barometers and smile.
penelope - Can we still do the tapping smile, Rosie?
Rosie - Alas no. Tapped mine and broke the glass. reveal
penelope - I meant metaphorically. I'm all weekend in Zeeland.
Phil - Come on England. Three more wickets this afternoon.
Software - England fail - football, rugby, cricket bloody useless, bah!
penelope - Why waste time watching? Get outside! Summer!
penelope - Get inside! Rain! Bring the washing in quick!
penelope - I'm a year older than a week ago.
Rosie - A year in a week! That's time-lapse, pen. Appy burfdy.
penelope - Little pleasure in eight words: beer and crisps.
penelope - I mean 'small pleasure'. That meant the opposite.
penelope - Beer and crisps, beer and crisps. Beer. Crisps.
penelope - I think I'm really ready for a holiday.
Phil - Playing cricket on a Tuesday afternoon, in sunshine.
penelope - [Phil] Do you still have a job? Nights?
Phil - [pen] Yes I do. It's rather flexible though.
penelope - Are we running out of eight words? Sad.
Raak - Novel octets are
Extraordinarily
Hard to keep going.
Rosie - I disagree, sir; I find them quite easy.
Boolbar - Blimey! Is this still going. I am amazed.
Rosie - I've finished making my telescope, the Mk II.
Phil - Can you see the pub from there, Rosie?
Rosie - I'm afraid light travels in boringly straight lines.
Boolbar - Put a black hole near the pub then.
Rosie - I want to get home again, you know.
penelope - Shit or get off the pot. Any more?
penelope - Or shall we call it a day now?
Rosie - That's most unladylike - did you mean the po?
penelope - Feminism.
Is that a typo (or 'typot') Rosie?
Rosie - Kids sit on the pot, adults the po.
penelope - There's a fabulous shaggy-dog story about a pisspot.
Rosie - Unfortunately there are only eight words available, pen.
penelope - It starts with a down-at-heel adder, I remember.
penelope - Who starts to do much better in life
Knobbly - It sounds like the cue for a limerick
penelope - Hang on, you don't know how it ends.
penelope - And one of the adder's longstanding friends boasts
penelope - that he's known him for a long time.
penelope - More details in the next exciting instalment, folks!
Rosie - Loth as I am to interrupt the flow . . . . .
penelope - Go on... and I really hope it's important
Rosie - Of course it isn't - please carry on, pen.
penelope - He knew him from his days of penury
penelope - This is an extremely shaggy dog. Enough yet?
Raak - Shaggy enough to make a big woolly jumper?
Rosie - It's not an adder, it's a boa subtractor.
penelope - Did that spring to mind at night, Rosie?
Rosie - For me it was late evening, I confess.
penelope - Anyhow, the done-good snake's reminiscing friend evenutally says:
Giertrud - Fun fact- I'm writing this from my PlayStation.
Rosie - Go on, pen. I'm agog, despite the hour.
penelope - "Oh yes, I've known him for so long...."
penelope - "I knew him when (this may surprise you)..."
penelope - :He didn't have a pit to hiss in."
Rosie - Tonite (sic) I am going to a jazz gig.
Giertrud - I've written eight words for your reading pleasure!
Tuj - [Rosie] Well then, eight word gig review, please!
Raak - There's a wasp in my office. In November!
Software - Saw two butterflies in my garden only yesterday.
blamelewis - Another unquestionable sign of the impending end times?
Rosie - (Tuj, belatedly) The New Delta Band played their arses off.
penelope - The first eight words of the New Year.
penelope - At this slow rate, we'll have summer soon.
Phil - Fair old stretch on the evenings this week.
Software - It will soon be my birthday, so there.
Rosie - They say it'll snow but I've had none.
Software - Me neither but it is brass monkeys outside.
penelope - The brass monkeys are queuing to get in!
penelope - Signs of spring. You can list them here.
penelope - Magpie carrying twigs this morning, from kitchen window
Software - Why do you keep twigs on your window?
penelope - For making twiglets. Doesn't everyone have twigs handy?
Giertrud - I used to, but they were pretzel twigs.
penelope - I didn't try Marmite until I was 19.
Rosie - Ma might have been looking after your health.
Tuj - I hope Mamma laid on alternative spreads instead.
penelope - Jam jam jam jam jam jam jam jam!
Phil - Low fat cream cheese, the sweet chilli flavour.
penelope - On bread, I mostly like marmalade and honey.
Rosie - You and I are as one on that.
Tuj - Jam jam jam jam jam jam jam jam...
Rosie - I gather you have just left the M25.
Kim - Jam, jam, jam, jam, jam! I've grown accustomed....
blamelewis - Amazing things can emerge from extensive jam sessions.
Software - This game seems to have been largely forgotten.
Phil - But eight words can bring it to life.
blamelewis - If only we could work out which eight.
Phil - I wonder if it is one of these?
Knobbly - OED random word generator suggestions: implex, quickhatch, profligation.
Rosie - If only I knew what these words meant.
blamelewis - The second is uttered while impatiently awaiting chicks.
Tuj - The first's the building where Santa's team works.
Raak - The last is someone who gives bondage classes.
Gusset Login - Should we find another list of random words?
Raak - Pack my box with five dozen liquor jugs.
Rosie - Random? It seems the monkeys have typed Shakespeare. Er, sorry Raak, old chap.
Tuj - OED random word generator II: topsoil moellon toughly
Giertrud - Great name for Public House: Pug Pup Pub.
Giertrud - Or how about this one: The Starving Starling?
Knobbly - Expanding on Raak's: 'Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas'
Knobbly - I seem to have stalled three games. Sorry.
Rosie - Nail gnats, Aesop, or pay apropos East Anglian. reveal
Giertrud - Big gnat? Small ogre? "Ergo Tango, gnat ogre!"
Phil - Hmmm. Re: bum sag - Rosie is "orgasm über"
KagomeShuko - Known. Ten animals I slam in a net.
Software - Time for another seven words, I suppose.
KagomeShuko - I can handle posting eight, so can you.
penelope - It's taken ages to find the right eight.
Software - I have just found another eight lying around.
CdM - Here's three more.
penelope - I must find five to make it right.
Rosie - Ha! Chance would be a fine thing, Phil.
Tuj - Je suis en le France avec mes amis.
blamelewis - J'ai parlez Francais com un vache Espanol, Oui.
Rosie - 'Dwi'n siarad Cymraeg fel Saeson, mae'n ddrwg geni.
penelope - Three words saying it's Thursday? Friday minus one.
Phil - Weekend minus two? Monday morning minus four? Yuk!
blamelewis - One, two, miss a few, ninety-nine, one-hundred! Coming!
Software - We must get over this obsession with numbers.
Rosie - I agree. Let's make it Greek letters instead.
Phil - My favourites are zeta, xi, theta and psi.
Rosie - And I thought you were an alpha male.
Phil - Funnily enough, that'th what Catherine Theta Joneth thaid.
penelope - Is it lunchtime yet? Did someone mention pie?
Rosie - Have you got permission to eta pi, pen?
penelope - Permission? It's more like Pie et mon droit.
Tuj - Pun time? If you can't beta them, join them.
penelope - One man's meta is another man's poison. Aye.
penelope - One man's meat is another man's poisson. Oui.
penelope - One man's meat is another man's possum. Beaut!
Rosie - One man's meat is another man's posaune. Ja! reveal
penelope - Have you tried eating troms off the bone?
blamelewis - And chase it down with sacks of phones.
penelope - I've just booked a two-night break in Ipswich.
Software - What do you plan to break there, pen?
penelope - The monotony and effort of working life, Softers.
Software - Working life? Ah, yes. I can remember that.
penelope - Only another 17 years to go until retirement.
penelope - The first eight words in October? Really? Blimey.
Software - Some of us are more active than others.
Rosie - Is there a game for the naturally reticent? reveal
penelope - It's would be the 'No Moves Necessary' game.
Phil - I'm busy with other things these days, alas.
penelope - Are you grandfathering a new generations of Crescenters?
Software - Grandfathering is easy. I've seven at last count.
Phil - Yes, penelope. He's due to be born tomorrow.
penelope - Oh my word... back to the future, Grandad!
penelope - It's bleddy dark, innit folks? Not very keen.
Tuj - Oh, there goes "No-Move-Ember". No-one tell you, pen?
penelope - [Tuj] I've got the golden ticket. You lose.
penelope - A small bonfire planned for tonight. Just because.
Software - Do the clogs understand the Guy Fawkes fascination?
penelope - Nope. Most of them don't know about it..
Giertrud - Wingtips, loafers, and trainers, however, love it dearly!
Kim - Not to mention winkle-pickers, brothel-creepers, espadrilles and Jesus-boots!
Software - That is quite a substantial list of footwear.
penelope - I can only wear one pair at once.
Phil - Why wear a pair, my dear old thing?
penelope - An odd pair makes me limp, old bean.
Software - That's strange; it's alcohol that makes me limp.
penelope - Take the bottle out of your shoe, numpty.
Rosie - I think limp was intended as an adjective.
Giertrud - Limp can be a noun, verb or adjective!
Blob - Whereas a limpet can only be a noun.
penelope - Meaning a small wet limp, isn't that so?
Software - Nobody is playing AVMA. Have I upset them?
Giertrud. - Happy New Year. Here Are Five More Words.
Rosie - Ah, so you are still alive over there, Giertrud.
penelope - Anyone else alive? I'm suffering death by chocolate.
Rosie - I'm alive, and undergoing death by condensed milk.
Software - I'm alive and recovering from jet lag, slowly.
penelope - I overslept this morning. Got away with it.
Rosie - Sirius was very bright over Thornton Heath tonight.
Phil - Stars over North Wessex Downs were stunning too.
penelope - And over Heijningen, but it was bloody nippy.
Rosie - Surely the stars are indifferent to their audience.
Chalky - Maybe so - but they look very different tonight.
Rosie - Why is that? Have you been ingesting substances?
Giertrud - Rosie, yes, I am still alive--sometimes kicking!
penelope - Minus six at home this morning. Very invigorating.
Software - You're made of tougher stuff, pen, warmer here.
penelope - I have single malt on my Weetabix, Softers.
Software - What? And the sun not over the yardarm?
Rosie - I think the sun has actually gone out.
penelope - Rainy Sunday. Bacon and egg sandwiches. That's all.
Rosie - The Met Office are now naming Atlantic storms.
penelope - I'm naming my bad moods. This one's Aelfsige.
Software - Rain, rain, rain. When will it ever stop?
penelope - I'm now part-owner of a 70-year old tractor.
Rosie - Anything 70 years old should be scrapped forthwith.
penelope - My mother might rightly put up a fight.
Raak - They don't make them like that any more.
Rosie - No, they're all diesels (diseasels, colloquially) these days.
penelope - Is it spring yet? Is it spring yet?
Zebedee - BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING!
Rosie - Starts 1st March, pen. We shall have snow.
penelope - How prescient, Rosie. We had snow this morning.
Giertrud - Chicken, fish, four sides ... am so full now.
Rosie - I must not indulge; I am already overweight.
KagomeShuko - But I can cook some really good food.
Giertrud - Oh yes, she can. I second that emotion.
penelope - I do not have my work head today.
penelope - Another Monday morning post, a month later. Pfft.
Tuj - Woo, Wednesday afternoon, woo! ...woo, woo... woo... Twit.
penelope - This looks like the end for one of
Rosie - the slowest games on record in the Morniverse.
penelope - Some things are really worth waiting for. Sometimes.
Software - I think that I see what you mean.
Rosie - I've got a mate who uses up-speak? Sad.
Tuj - Imagine sometimes being age bracketed with millenials. Terrifying.
penelope - Less chance if you cultivate your grey hairs.
Rosie - My cat was a millennial, born about 1990.
Bismarck - My millennial falcon was stolen by George Lucas.
penelope - Freddie Starr ate my hamster. No, wait, ummm...
Raak - It's Summer! It was Winter a moment ago.
Rosie - (Raak) That's a pretty good definition of Spring.
Bismarck - True English people, nostalgically talking about the weather.
penelope - Nostaligic? It's happening right now! There's no waiting!
Raak - Spring again. Looks like Summer, feels like Winter.
Rosie - Shurely not with the Cup Final coming up?
Bismarck - Summer starts on Mid-summers day. Finishes shortly afterwards.
Rosie - I hope Mourinho cocks up at Man U.
penelope - I never wish ill on anyone. Except Trump.
Bismarck - One no trump, doubled, redoubled, went three down.
nights - *waves tiredly from under a pile of marking*
Rosie - We have had rather a good thunderstorm today.
Rosie - And another one today (sic) and tomorrow's Thor's Day.
Thor - Glad to be of service, don't you know.
Boolbar - Too much pizza. Too much cake. Now sleepy.
Software - Hummmph! European cup boredom has set in already.
Rosie - Being of the Cambrian persuasion I profoundly disagree.
penelope - I didn't leave the house the whole weekend.
Boolbar - Too much pizza. Too much cake. Again? Yes!
penelope - Ooooh cake! I need coffee and walnut. NOW!
penelope - In fact, I think that's tonight's project. Yummy.
Bismarck - Don't leave that cake out in the rain.
Tuj - I fear that this sentence will non sequitur.
penelope - Did anyone get solsticed overnight or this morning??
Boolbar - Is it Summer? Dense rain is hiding everything.
Software - Well, that's it, the days are drawing in.
penelope - Thank goodness. Short nights are short of sleep.
Rosie - When nights grow longer the heat grows stronger.
Raak - Longer days give more time to do things.
Giertrud - Finally out of hospital after hit-and-run... reveal
Bismarck - There's a story behind that, mark my words.
Rosie - I hope you are well and fully reassembled, Giertrud.
Software - Well, that hot spell did not last long.
penelope - Was hot here yesterday - bought a new hammock.
Raak - Still sweltering in mad dogs and Englishmen weather.
penelope - I'm on hols. Forecast: three days' persistent rain.
Software - Well, it is raining here if that counts.
Rosie - Nineteen millimetres of rain have ruined my drought.
Software - More rain in August than in July, already.
penelope - [Rosie] So sorry about your ruined drought. *snigger*
Bismarck - Radio Four long wave, Test Match Special, civilisation.
penelope - American niece arrived safely. Sent her to Amsterdam.
Rosie - Why you sen' 'er Amsterdam? Wa' she done?
penelope - She wanted to see. Ate pancakes, drank beer.
Rosie - Next week's over-hyped heatwave has been toned down.
penelope - I wish someone would tell the mosquitos. Ouch.
Rosie - There's a full moon Thursday night. Take care.
Boolbar - I suggest you put your trousers back on.
Rosie - Nobody will see anything - it will be cloudy.
Software - Weather report Jersey: It is quite windy today.
penelope - Is your Jersey windproof? Mine has knitted holes.
Rosie - Next Wednesday looks very hot (at the moment).
Software - It was here, at any rate, old chum.
Rosie - It was quite sweaty this Wednesday, 27 degrees.
Software - Sweatier here, 29 degrees by all accounts.
penelope - We had 31 yesterday. I'm buying discounted sweaters.
Bismarck - 28 here, which means I am a sweater.
Software - Somewhat cooler today and windy too, by jingo.
penelope - Another 30 degrees today. Thunderstorms tomorrow, I hope.
Boolbar - 3 Degrees now. Next up is The Supremes.
Rosie - My baby love went completely pear-shaped, alas.
Rosie - Eight words is insufficient for Morningtonesque prolixity, obviously.
penelope - People can look stupid in just in eight words.
CdM - Eight? Two!
Rosie - Behold, the full moon beams down at us.
penelope - Is it now a waxing or waning sliver?
Raak - Silver should be scrubbed with Silvo, not waxed.
Boolbar - Wax would make the Lone Ranger slide off.
Superman - The clocks went back! The clocks went back!
Rosie - What did they find when they got back?
penelope - [Rosie] They found there was no time left.
Rosie - Poor clocks! Let's hear it for the Luddites.
Boolbar - Apparently Donald Trump's clock has two little hands.
penelope - We're out of time on that one. Next!
Superman - Critical mass of stupidity attained, implosion countdown started.
Bismarck - Where's the bloody Kryptonite when you need it?
Rosie - Kryptonite? What I need is a crap tonight.
penelope - [Rosie] Just had eight days of the other.
Boolbar - I find a crossword helps. Number two down.
Rosie - Italians no problem. Milan is on the Po.
Rosie - I have been barred from my local. Hooray!
Software - Is that because of your outspokenness then, Rosie?
penelope - That's one way to save money over Christmas.
Rosie - (Softers) They cannot stand even mild web criticism.
Rosie - (pen) Nah! There are plenty more agreeable places.
penelope - So you're looking for a 'yes' pub? Cheers!
Rosie - (pen) Not difficult. A splendid one in Croydon.
penelope - It's bleddy dark, innit? When's the solstice then?
Rosie - (pen) Wednesday at 10.44 UT. Gloom, glorious gloom.
Boolbar - Horrah! That means it will soon be Summer!
Raak - The sooner Summer comes, the sooner Winter follows.
Software - Raak, that is really a very depressing truism.
Raak - The sooner Winter comes, the sooner Summer follows!
Bismarck - Which comes first - the winter or the summer?
penelope - Storm Barbara hits as we go to sea.
Bismarck - Ploughing the waves is a desperately wet affair.
Raak - And the furrows don't stay where they're ploughed.
Giertrud - I'm adding a comment here for no reason.
Rosie - That statement defies its own logic, doesn't it?
Boolbar - I'm adding a currant here for no raisins.
CdM - Happy New Year!
Software - And the same to you.
penelope - My keyboard is all smeared with coconut oil.
Software - Not being naughty in the office, are we?
penelope - The painful truth; seasonal excema, defies cortisone cream. :o(
Raak - I have some coconut oil -- must try it.
Rosie - Is it any good for trombone slide lubrication?
Boolbar - I find it stops my coconuts from chaffing.
penelope - [Rosie] You'll be playing all the Copacobana tunes.
Rosie - I can only play The Girl From Ipanema.
penelope - But not The Boy From New York City?
Rosie - I can do this screamer at half pace.
penelope - [Rosie] Go on then. Don't blow a gasket!
Bismarck - A nine millimetre snowdrift appeared outside my house. ?
penelope - Please keep me away from the news today.
Software - pen, I've become a newsphobe since May's promotion.
Rosie - (pen) Got any gaskets, then? There are limits.
Superman - I'm going back to bed and staying there.
Rosie - Is this a form of hibernation, then, Superman?
Superman - Yes, it's the next step in human evolution.
Boolbar - My mouth has evolved into a cereal port.
penelope - How long can we possibly avoid the inevitable?
Rosie - For as long as your toothache is bearable.
penelope - For as long as I still have teeth.
Tuj - I haven't eaten cereal in about 6 months =(
Superman - Alas for [Tuj], the bears steal his porridge!
penelope - My local supermarkets have stopped selling Weetabix. Brexit!
Rosie - Brexit? Well, f***s it up if nothing else.
penelope - Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday yay!
Bismarck - My opinion doesn't count. Probably best that way.
Bismarck - My opinion doesn't count. Probably best that way.
Boolbar - Friday pizza cake Friday pizza cake double yay!
penelope - Sunday afternoon. Wasted most of it asleep. Bugger.
Boolbar - Monday morning sunshine! Stuck in the office. Bugger.
penelope - Monday morning rain. Snug in the office. Smug.
Software - Monday morning, retired, lazing at home, even smugger.
Raak - Aching shoulders, arms. But in a good way.
penelope - [Raak] Have you been lifting pretty ballerinas again?
Raak - [pen] Just beating on drums the whole day.
penelope - What goes with fried onions? A friend asks.
Raak - Liver. Sausages. Bacon. Black pudding. More fried onions.
penelope - Steak, hot dogs, more hot dogs. Damn. Hungry.
Rosie - Your appetite appears insatiable, pen. Is this good?
penelope - [Rosie] Absolutely not. I'm a fat bloater, curses.
Rosie - Never thought of you as a fish, pen.
Bismarck - The pen fish is mightier than the swordfish.
Software - Nobody has made a comment for two weeks.
penelope - Except you. You broke the radio silence, Softers.
Raak - If we're very quiet, that might mend it.
Rosie - Such an approach requires elimination of the flatulent.
Software - pen, did I transgress in some obscure way?
Bismarck - Incoming! This message will self-destruct in five seconds.
Boolbar - [Bismarck] Your message may have a faulty fuse.
penelope - Don't touch it! It might still go off!
Rosie - My wholemeal rolls have gone off, but quietly.
penelope - Longer life wholemeal. Kept cryogenically frozen, for ever.
Raak - They're not "off", they have a freshness difference.
Rosie - I wouldn't try that approach with chicken nuggets.
Software - Nor mussels, definitely not with mussels, oh, no.
penelope - My home-made chicken liver pate was off immediately.
penelope - And so was I. Anyone need a purge?
Superman - After Brexit, all communications will be reduced by
Rosie - The early worm is caught by the bird.
Software - Birds are sharp; especially their pointy little beaks.
Superman - The dawn chorus is in E flat major.
Rosie - I didn't know the dickybirds played alto sax.
KagomeShuko - The birds outside my window play fowl music.
Bismarck - Ta-dum, ta-dum, ta-tee and I've forgotten the rest.
Rosie - Not just the rest but the key change.
penelope - I'm not changing keys. Mine still open doors.
Rosie - They won't open my back door - it's stuck.
penelope - Have you tried some sort of greasy lubricant?
Superman - Rosie, you didn't glue the front door, too?
Rosie - (pen) It sags. Cheap 'n' nasty from B&Q (one word).
Bismarck - France apparently voted for a macaroon as president.
Boolbar - [Bismarck] Preferable to a biro that works underwater.
penelope - Brexit friends coming for the weekend. Shit fuck.
Bismarck - That's the "entertainment" you're putting on, pen?
Superman - The Eurovision Song Contest has been and gone.
Software - Has it? I did not really notice it.
Rosie - It's been chucking it down here all day.
penelope - Muggy but dry here. It was 30c yesterday.
Bismarck - Oh the joy of the decaffeinated vole dance!
Rosie - The caffeine content of voles is quite remarkable.
Boolbar - Makes them jump over composers. Vole Over Beethoven!
Tuj - *fixes a vole where the rain gets in*
Rosie - Italian voles can fly, caffeinated or otherwise. Volare!.
Giertrud - Fixing a vole? Isn't that by The Beatles?
Rosie - Revolver is by the Beatles. I remember it.
Boolbar - Volvic. Ideal for voles with a blocked nose.
Rosie - Volvo. Ideal for transporting large numbers of rodents.
Superman - Evolution, or the development of Vole mark 2.
blamelewis - Voluntary. To ask the vole to hurry up.
Bismarck - Alcovolism, a terrible trend among the gnawing youth.
Raak - Voles never need to wear spectacles — nolens volens.
penelope - Is it the weekend yet? How much longer?
KagomeShuko - A couple of days need to go by.
Boolbar - I wonder if voles look forward to weekends?
Rosie - Most voles support Sunderland, so I doubt it.
Superman - The vole weekend runs from November to March.
Rosie - This proves that voles are of Australian origin.
Bismarck - Hot. Rug under shady tree, watermelon. No voles.
penelope - Hot rug. Under shadytree? Water me lonno voles.
Rosie - Watermelons can swing like mad. Just get this.
penelope - So do cement mixers; a favourite of Pater's.
Rosie - Compared with that, my playing is crap, alas.
penelope - My playing is like a cement mixer's, alas.
Software - I can play the cement mixer - musique concrete.
Bismarck - He who pays the builder, calls the tune.
Boolbar - Music for plumbers. Sounds ideal for tap dancing.
Software - There was once a group called The Scaffold.
Rosie - Didn't they hymn the virtues of capital punishment?
penelope - You want to get ahead? Get a guillotine.
Boolbar - Are pesky seabirds annoying you? Get a gullotine.
Superman - Is the guillemot a seabird which headed off?
Bismarck - Guillotine motion in the Commons: A good idea!
Rosie - Whose head shall roll? Such a wonderful choice.
penelope - Head rolls? I prefer bacon butties, sans ketchup.
Software - You are teasing my taste buds now, pen.
penelope - Friday. FRIDAY! Do you know what that means?
Rosie - Your devices are buggered, yesterday being THOR's day,
drquuxum - But today is Wednesday, and it's nearly lunch.
Bismarck - ...Tuesday, Wednesday heart attack; Thursday never looking back...
KagomeShuko - Your British Friday comes before our American Friday.
Giertrud - American fry day means we eat French fries.
Boolbar - Chunky chips or French fries? Which is better?
Software - Mmmm. A tough choice. Can I have both?
Superman - Mayonnaise, ketchup, brown sauce or salt and vinegar?
penelope - It's Saturday, I'm on hols and I'm working.
Raak - Is not all of life, the great work?
drquuxum - "My heart is in the work", said Carnegie.
Rosie - "My work is in the heart". (Christiaan Barnard).
drquuxum - Ergo, the work equals the groove (Deee-lite, Bootsy).
Bismarck - "Heart is work and work is heart." (Physics)
Bismarck - That would be the first law of thermodynamics,
Bismarck - At the third beep, it will be Friday.
Rosie - I hear no beep; this man is mad.
Bismarck - I am as sane as the next man!
penelope - As far as I know, he's mad too.
Rosie - Mad people are simply those you don't know.
Raak - Friends are the ones who share your madness.
drquuxum - Close friends are the ones who cause it.
penelope - Another rainy Saturday. This really isn't good enough.
Superman - Rain, rain, go away, come again on Sunday.
Tuj - [Superman] Your fault the Southern Vipers lost today?!
Rosie - Another Wembley victory for My Lot, I crow.
Superman - That makes you one of those London Welsh?
Giertrud - Currently I'm eating bangers and chips... crazy huh?
Giertrud - Currently I'm eating bangers and chips... crazy huh?
penelope - Two plates and bangers and chips please, waiter.
Bismarck - Will madame take the Lincolnshire or the Cumberland?
penelope - [Bis] The lesser of two evils, or wurst.
drquuxum - [pen] Shouldn't that be comparative and not superlative?
penelope - Pay day and wedding anniversary. My cup overflows.
penelope - But husband had a dental mauling this morning.
Rosie - (Superman) Yes, but a Chelsea supporter for sixty years.
(Giertrud) Clearly those sausages are repeating on you.
Giertrud - I don't know why that line posted twice!
Bismarck - Today is the day. Tonight is the night.
Rosie - (Busmarck) Are you on a promise or something?
Bismarck - Deadline day Announcement: Chelsea did not sign Bismarck.
penelope - Football schmootball. It's autumn! Best time of year.
penelope - It's Friday again. That went very quickly.
Superman - Tuesday special: Peas, grilled mackerel and baked potatoes.
drquuxum - I should probably go grab my epi-pen, then.
Superman - No Friday message from pen - is something wrong?
penelope - Friday's message is approximately three days late. Soz.
Bismarck - Maybe you could do a few in advance?
Giertrud - Will we have to retreat after we advance?
Superman - Bees breeze May's maze before beef awes me.
penelope - Two weeks have passed. Doesn't time fly when...
Boolbar - ...you are trying to find eight words that...
Phil - ...express succinctly, yet clearly, that which you wish...
Rosie - ... were true, but owing to the lamentable state ....
Superman - ...of things, coupled with self-imposed octo-verbal asceticism, only...
CdM - ...serve...
penelope - lunches between 12 and 2, teas from five.
Software - Phew, that was quite a long eight word ...
Raak - peregrination through the farther reaches of le huitisme.
Rosie - Shurely le huitisme must include the friendly octopus.
Tuj - I have not worn my surgical stockings today.
Raak - My second-best truss is on the writing table.
Superman - Thanks for your support. I'll always wear it.
penelope - So who wore your surgical stockings today, Tuj?
Software - Not me. I just word nylons and suspenders.
Rosie - Does The Morniverse really need a pantomime dame?
drquuxum - …I feel like everyone is looking at me.
penelope - Oh no they're not! He's behind you!
Rosie - My attention has been diverted by a leopard.
drquuxum - Can't be me...my fursona is a skunk.
drquuxum - Speaking of which, how is Projoy these days?
Rosie - Alive, AFAIK. Posts occasionally.
penelope - He's alive and well. We tweeted last night.
Rosie - Is that what it's called these days, then.
penelope - [Rosie] I suppose so. *Tweets regularly and often*
Software - Bloody Christmas muzak in all the shops already.
Boolbar - I wish it couldn't be Christmas every day.
drquuxum - "Sleigh bells ring, are you listenin'?" Cheeses, no.
Tuj - Well, now I want to change the subject.
KagomeShuko - I don't like losing my voice, at all.
penelope - I've looked everywhere and can't find it, KagomeShuko.
Software - Look! There it is! Go stop it, quickly!
Bismarck - It turned out to be only an echo.
Boolbar - to be only an echo. only an echo.
penelope - If only Monday was an echo of Saturday.
Rosie - You can say that again, pen. Bloody traffic!
penelope - Decent covering of snow this morning. Now thaw.
Rosie - (pen) Same here in the Elevated Surrey Desert.
penelope - House tidy, presents wrapped. Shame we'll be away.
penelope - Too late for any more Xmas shopping now.
Giertrud - Merry Christmas. Hanukkah's been over for a while.
Boolbar - Too many mince pies. I'm farting currants now.
Rosie - This can only mean they pass through unchanged.
Raak - This is metaphorical of an esoteric spiritual truth.
penelope - I’ve had enough of unchanged raisins. Long story.
penelope - Today's positive: It's actually a sunny Monday morning.
Rosie - The sun dazzled me whilst driving to hospital.
penelope - And yesterday was a sunny beaut. Today's glum.
Boolbar - The sun has got its hat on today.
Rosie - The moon, though, is happy to parade starkers.
KagomeShuko - It is Mardi Gras season here in Louisiana.
Bismarck - All these days that turn into seasons... Sigh...
Rosie - My car's MOT repairs will cost a mint.
Boolbar - I wonder if you drive a Volkswagen Polo?
Bismarck - Moving slowly in a high-speed train through France.
penelope - That’s quite some achievement. A real brake through.
Bismarck - Three inches of snow was all it took, Pen.
penelope - French snow falls in centimetres not inches, innit?
penelope - We're expecting snow this afternoon. Three centimentres, misschien
penelope - Meeting with lunch soon. Lunch yay! Meeting yuk...
Boolbar - Have we run out of eight word sentences?
Tuj - [Boolbar] It doesn't matter. There are other ways.
blamelewis - Like two of four. That's the terse version.
Rosie - Four of two, though, is taking the piss.
Boolbar - Is it? Should I? Best not. Bye now!
Tuj - Extremes? Visited. Regrets? Pending. Steam? Out. Um. Of.
Rosie - Watching University Challenge completely undermines my self-esteem.
blamelewis - I find Only Connect has the same effect.
Tuj - For me it's just being alive! Oh well.
penelope - That's why I watch them when I'm ironing.
penelope - Tidily folded things means a small achievement achieved.
Superman - Clothes origami is more fun than it sounds.
penelope - Clothes origami is less fun than it sounds.
Boolbar - I was quick at origami. Like creased lightning.
Rosie - Plenty ackers. Origami backwards is "I'm a giro".
penelope - I’m sitting in the car outside the windmill.
Bismarck - Memo to pen - next windmill with a garage.
penelope - I've just finished a 120-hour working fortnight. Ouch.
KagomeShuko - Not as painful as so many hours of job searching.
penelope - Don’t chop chillies and then poke your eye.
Rosie - Nor peel potatoes and lacerate your finger.
blamelewis - Likewise, grated carrots should not be stained red...
KagomeShuko - Carrots never used to be orange in color.
Rosie - So, I wonder, what colour were they, then?
blamelewis - Black and White, as was everything until 1936.
Raak - I think the colour palette also included sepia.
blamelewis - Nah, stuff just went brown with age, surely?
Rosie - I wish that were true of my beard.
penelope - Odd. My hair greys but my beard blackens.
blamelewis - Pigment drains downwards. (Nobody look at their feet!)
Juxtapose - Pack my box with five dozen liquor jugs.
Rosie - Jackdaws love my big sphinx of quartz. Innit.
Boolbar - I am jolly vexed with Scrabble rack NPFQUZG.
blamelewis - [Boolbar] Pug? Fun? Gun? Fug? Pun? Up? Gnu?
Superman - "Permanence" comprises all the eight principles of Yong.
Rosie - I somehow think Boolbar was taking the piss.
Juxtapose - There are over 300 American people named "Abcde".
Rosie - I'd like to know how they pronounce that.
blamelewis - "Absidy" - Dave Gorman did a thing about it.
Bismarck - Ho! What news from Brecknock this fine morn?
KagomeShuko - I am up way too late, once again.
penelope - I woke early. Still managed to be late.
Juxtapose - Americans say "It's five o'clock somewhere..." (then drink).
KagomeShuko - Seussical, Jr. was my local entertainment last night.
blamelewis - I woke up today full of Joyce's offspring.
penelope - Is it lunchtime yet? I'm flipping starving, mate.
Bismarck - One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Nine.
Superman - You've been promoted from Graf to Count? Congrats.
penelope - Four day week then a week off. Spiffing.
blamelewis - Working in the Lake District this week. Bliss.
Rosie - I sweat like a pig in this weather
Raak - I went to work. Unexpected holiday. Came home.
KagomeShuko - I should be writing a paper for class.
blamelewis - [KagomeShuko] Write it in eight word chunks, maybe?
penelope - Unexpected holiday? Does not compute. 'Highly anticipated', shurly?
penelope - Another eight words for today. Here you go.
Rosie - Has anyone here ever actually been to Bal-ham?
penelope - Gateway to the south where the honey's off?
Rosie - The very place. There's a jazz pub there.
KagomeShuko - I've been to the city of Nashville, Tennessee.
Penelope - And the next line of your song is ...?
Rosie - A quiet week. Is nobody outraged at anything?
blamelewis - I reckon "Outrage fatigue" might be a thing...
penelope - I've been angry for two years and counting.
Bismarck - What were you before two years ago, pen?
penelope - An EU citizen with guaranteed freedom of movement.
Rosie - (pen) We, by contrast, wear the Brexit straitjacket.
Software - Brexit? Just don't get me started on that!
penelope - Steady Softers. I'm two years angry and counting.
Rosie - What magic potion shall pacify thy troubled soul?
penelope - [Rosie] I'll have a gin and tonic, thanks.
penelope - I'm writing 20 Tweets. For work. Not fun.
Simons Mith - I'm enjoying my new job - even the commute!
penelope - [Simons] You sound surprised! What are you doing?
Simons Mith - [Pen] Technical writing, and surprised by the commute part.
penelope - [Simons] Describe the commute! You have eight words...
Simons Mith - Two one-hour train journeys, relaxing, looking at trees.
Simons Mith - Apologies for shouting - my bolding habit's rather ingrained.
penelope - We all get bolder with age. Nowt new.
Raak - A day of respite from the heat wave!
Rosie - No respite from the canonisation of Gareth Southgate.
penelope - I wasn't expecting football to come home, TBH.
Bismarck - Football is not in favour of Brexit, obvs.
penelope - Who else is not going home anytime soon?
Simons Mith - Well, for one there's the Spirit Mars rover.
penelope - Anyone having anything really interesting for lunch today?
Boolbar - Ostrich and walnut salad with a mint dressing.
Rosie - My lawn has turned to concrete and straw.
CdM - Spotted it!!!

Wait. Wrong game; sorry.

As you were.
Bismarck - [CdM] The Bird awaits its game creation on OrangeMC.
Juxtapose - They're summarizing films as limericks over on Reddit.
Rosie - Meteorological records OK but it makes me knackered.
blamelewis - Awestruck ostrich. I like the sound of that.
Boolbar - Awesome sandwich. I like the sound of that.
Bismarck - Things are not as they seem, said I.
Rosie - Maybe you are under the influence of substances.
blamelewis - There certainly seem to be some substantial influences...
KagomeShuko - I had an awesome cheesesteak the other day.
KagomeShuko - Thank goodness for the fact that interjections exist.
Giertrud - Are the influential influences influenced by influential fluids?
Rosie - Why on earth do people buy bottled water?
Raak - For the free reusable bottle it comes with.
KagomeShuko - The tap water in Lake Charles tastes gross.
Boolbar - Tap water and you will make some ripples.
Bismarck - Was that an underwater tap for drinking from?
Software - Hmmmm. More Brexit bollocks from Boris Johnson's pen.
Bismarck - There's no business like show business, except Brexit.
Raak - I haven't turned on my central heating yet.
Boolbar - I don't want to arouse my central heating!
Rosie - *filth alert* Mine arouses itself. It's a bit of a wanker.
Rosie - Mine arouses itself. It's a bit of a wanker.
Rosie - Er, ignore the last entry.
Software - Ignorance is bliss, or so they do say.
Rosie - Fortunately, I have never heard that phrase before.
Boolbar - It's just a phrase I am going through.
Bismarck - But is bliss just a form of ignorance?
Bismarck - In the duty-free at Folkestone - the Chanel Tunnel...
Software - Mmmm. Duty free? Are you in the future?
Bismarck - Duty-free was never abolished in the European Union.
Software - Mmmm. Duty free? Are you in the future?
Bismarck - In the duty-free at Folkestone - the Chanel Tunnel...
Bismarck - But is bliss just a form of ignorance?
Rosie - Certainly not - I know full well I'm pissed.
Software - Well, now it's November, winter does draw on.
Boolbar - November? Already? It will soon be Summer again.
Bismarck - I wish you all a winter of content.
Software - The government is collapsing all around us today.
Rosie - The Prime Minister is lost in the Mayhem.
Superman - Rats that can't swim leaving the sinking ship?
Superman - Are Harry and Meghan's children the Brown Windsors?
Software - May kicks the can down the road again.
Rosie - Are we ever going to see pen again?
Software - [Rosie] when she gets some Dutch courage maybe.
Superman - I suspect she contributed to the Almanac.
Superman - Please add a word of your choice, above.
Rosie - acerbically
Software - Foggy here and flights disrupted. I fly tomorrow :(
Superman - Indigestion. Rennies, orange flavour. All much better now.
Raak - Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Yamato! Taiko! Bang! Bang!
Rosie - Is this a reference to your percussive abilities?
Raak - I was at a taiko concert on Saturday.
KagomeShuko - Brexit sounds like a breakfast cereal to me.
Pablo - It sounds like a total disaster to me
Bismarck - Election's over - welcome to a brave new world.
Software - Well, another month has passed without further comment.
Bismarck - Don't disturb us, we're aestivating. Takes effort, that.
penelope - Hello all. Long time no see. How's everyone?
Bismarck - Hi pen, we were pining for the windmills...
penelope - How can you mix up windmills and fjords?
Boolbar - Mrs Jowls did Finland. That is one way.
Bismarck - Pine. Pine, pine, pine, pine. Your turn now.
penelope - More likely to be clogging up the fjords...
blamelewis - I'd like a Norwegian car. A Fjord Escort...
Pablo - Is that a spin off from the Hillman?
Bismarck - The Humber might have been a fjord once.
Rosie - The Humber Super Snipe was a Ford once.
penelope - The Humber Snipe was delicious.
Superman - As a result, I have to do something with eleven words.
Pablo - Shall we go back to the eight now?
Rosie - Indeed, we should accord this game proper dignity.
Bismarck - Why not take a bath with a squid?
Pablo - Excellent idea - someone pass the bath salts please.
penelope - Which clever clogs is hiding the bath pepper?
Bismarck - Not me. I do have the Bath buns.
Blob - While I have a model of Bath Abbey
Pablo - Are you all members of the Ba'ath Party?
Bismarck - I'm one of the founders - an early Ba'ath.
rab - Hello. Sorry I’ve been absent for so long.
Software - Welcome back, then, Rab, pull up a chair.
rab - Yes, I would like a cup of tea.
Rosie - Treat it as cannabis and heat the pot.
Pablo - Would you like one of my special cookies?
Superman - Why is Pablo dressed as a Guide Girl?
rab - I think they are coming to get me
Bismarck - Haven't heard anything from rab - they got 'im!
Pablo - I am not a Girl Guide - sod off
Rosie - I now have Localised Surface Water Flooding Issues.
KagomeShuko - There's no snow here and I'm very happy.
Rosie - Is snow normal at Christmas where you live?
KagomeShuko - Where I live, snow isn't a common thing.
CdM - If I recall, KS inhabits the Deepish Southreveal
KagomeShuko - Yes, deep South of United States of America.
Pablo - In Australia, they have the Deep North - similar.
Tuj - Anyone for a game of ping-pong? *bounces ball*
Rosie - Involving predicting when your microwave starts chucking up.
penelope - Visit Louth Pie Day dot com. Thank you.
Superman - louthpieday.com’s server IP address could not be found.
Raak - When I tried it it worked for me.
penelope - Sometimes our pies conflict with our cookies, presumably.
penelope - Please try loading Pies again. Better luck now?
Superman - Works. Who is this pie competition contact "xxx"?
penelope - [Superman] It might be me. I'm Madame Pie .
Bismarck - Let's throw, though, loathly thespians athwart Louth's pies.
Rosie - Let's include as many th's as we can.
penelope - We'll spit out our pies with those ths.
Software - Sorry can't oblige, because I have a lisp.
Rosie - Shurely your pies are not actually spitworthy, pen.
Bismarck - Does twenty-six miles of pies make a python?
penelope - How many pies in a pylon? Anyone know?
KagomeShuko - Do pies belong in the Labyrinth of Nightmare?
Bismarck - Surely a pile of pies makes a pylon?
Boolbar - Pies fit for a king: cooked in pyrex.
Software - I think that I shall self-isolate for now.
penelope - So how's everyone doing? Anyone working from home?
Bismarck - Yes, but since all the kids are here...
Rosie - .....and some of them may well be mine.
Bismarck - Not likely. Should I send two on spec.?
Rosie - I have no kids. I was channelling Boris.
penelope - Does anyone want sunflowers? We've grown too many.
Pablo - Hmm. How does one transport sunflowers these days?
Boolbar - [Pablo] Quickly. Put your petal to the metal.
penelop - We've got spare sunflowers. Has anyone got room?
Rosi - Couldn't you make cooking oil out of them?
Boolba - I'm sure some hungry hamsters will enjoy them.
Rosie - Goats love them so send them to Llandudno.
Bismarck - Llandudno. Post-apocalyptic goats make better job of it.
Rhosi - Llandudno. I bet you can't pronounce it properly
Bismarck - I'll put my money where my mouth is !
Rosie - This may well cause you heavy-metal poisoning.
Bismarck - Still preferable to taking on a post-apocalyptic goat.
Rosie - Goat in Welsh is gafr, the plural geifr.
penelope - In Dutch, geit is goat. Giet is pour.
Software - And Welsh cheese is cwas, Dutch is kaas.
Rosie - It isn't, it's caws, which rhymes with house.
Software - Ah, alas. A typo in a foreign language.
Rosie - My favourite Welsh word is mochyn, meaning pig.
penelope - Secured a supermarket delivery, first for eight weeks.
Rosie - I still have to hang around outside Waitrose.
penelope - Yeah but Waitrose! Anticipating the posh goodies within!
penelope - Dutch supermarkets are lacklustre and the cheese stinks.
Raak - I thought all cheese was supposed to stink!
Rosie - Not that posh, pen but just nicer people.
penelope - Warp and weft. Weft goes weft to wight.
Pablo - So it ends up on an island then?
penelope - Yep. And then it gets weft behind, obvs.
Pablo - Boom boom! You get a ten point bonus.
Software - Warp factor ten, when the sun is shining.
Rosie - That's what happens when you leave timber outside.
penelope - I'm marooned on the continent. Please send sausages.
Pablo - What flavour? Ferret and coriander? Goose and bubblegum?
KagomeShuko - I prefer bratwurst or maybe cheesy Italian kielbasa.
Software - Pen, does not Albert Heijn stock Toulouse sausages?
penelope - Not the little stores near me. Helaas, nee.
Rosie - How can anyone be marooned on the continent?
penelope - When ones native island country cuts itself adrift?
Pablo - Hee hee hee hee Brexit hee hee hee
penelope - Three-day week for me, sunny weather coming up.
Software - Rosie and I have a seven day weekend.
Rosie - This is true - thus TFI Friday is meaningless.
Bismarck - Who's F, and why T them at all?
penelope - We're on Version 16. I hate editing sometimes.
Software - Version sixteen of what, may I please ask?
Boolbar - [pen] Call it version 2 of version 15.
penelope - Fooled myself with versions 7.1-7.9 to avoid V8!
penelope - The history [yawn] of the business [yawn] school.
Bismarck - Like "Hogwarts - A History", the book nobody read?
(And don't forget to slip a few "innovations" in.)
KagomeShuko - I've worked way too many hours this week.
penelope - As long as they are all paid hours...
Rosie - The state and BP pay all my hours.
Bismarck - Anyone know where I can buy some spats?
Rosie - Other than a spat shop, I can't help.
KagomeShuko - Maybe on Park Avenue in New York City.
penelope - Or Jermyn Street. Who needs spats these days?
Raak - Someone planning a vacation back to the 1920s?
Rosie - I thought a spat was a violent disagreement.
Boolbar - Are spats worn in the present, called spits?
Pablo - No, they are in fact called an affectation
KagomeShuko - I do fine with my paw print galoshes.
penelope - So what are galoshes, exactly? Oshes for gals?
Software - Does that mean the existence of ladloshes, pen?
Boolbar - I think it could be galoshes and galohes.
Pablo - Ex Irish gal'o'sheas: "woman of the Shea clan".
penelope - Hot enough for you yet? [Southern hemisphere exempted]
Rosie - No. I need thirty-six for a new record.
Boolbar - Blimey! I hadn't realised LPs cost so much!
Radox The Green - Did anyone here ever collect Green Shield stamps?
KagomeShuko - I collected cartoon stickers for comic making books.
Rosie - I collected engine numbers, some of them prime.
Dujon - Train spotting! I used once to enjoy that.
Rosie - I find your word order rather unusual, Duj.
Dujon - That is because I'm an unusual chap, Rosie.
Bismarck - Train spotting is an artistic form of graffiti.
Boolbar - I last spotted a train at a wedding.
Simons Mith - Don't trains usually get married at marshalling yards?
Dujon - No, Simons Mith, they are measured in yards.
KagomeShuko - Yards of ale sound like very big drinks.
Rosie - They are barometric units like inches of mercury.
Simons Mith - Important safety tip: Don't try quaffing the latter.
Rosie - I think it would pass through you unchanged.
KagomeShuko - As long as you don't inhale the stuff.
Rosie - Even Bill Clinton didn't inhale the stuff, allegedly.
Bismarck - Old presidents never die, they just stop inhaling.
penelope - My dog's got no nose. What comes next?
Simons Mith - A tragic inability to differentiate odours. Poor dog.
Rosie - One could also say "How does he smell?"
Bismarck - Pen, you need to take that dog back.
Bismarck - I mean, it's still under guarantee, isn't it?
penelope - I was merely alluding to a favourite joke.
penelope - (From my childhood, obvs. I'm more sophisticated now)
Boolbar - What's brown and sticky?    Entertainment for dogs. Fetch!
KagomeShuko - At least you took the high road, Bool.
penelope - Lo! Roads and beaten tracks are for losers.
Software - Imagining pen careering downhill on her mountain bike.
Rosie - Difficult, given the planar nature of the Netherlands.
Pablo - Could it be she would go flat out?
penelope - You can't ride a bike with a flat.
Rosie - You can't ride one in a flat either.
Dujon - I find the Flat Earth Society rather odd.
Boolbar - They say they have members around the world.
Rosie - Rather odd, Duj? What is really odd, then?
Dujon - There are levels of oddity, 'rather' is one.
Dujon - 'Really odd' means the opposite of even; true?
Rosie - Covid is getting to you. Take it easy.
KagomeShuko - Really odd or very odd or extremely odd?
Pablo - In quantum mechanics, are there degrees of "Oddity"?
Bismarck - I think there are in BBC wildlife programmes.
penelope - Only one in space programmes, according to Bowie.
Software - Combining wildlife with degrees there's always Bill Oddie.
Pablo - Bill, I think, has always qualified as "wildlife".
penelope - Sometimes I wish *I* had a wild life.
KagomeShuko - Pen, methinks wild lives are usually grately overrated.
penelope - Maybe. My dog retrieved a dead rat yesterday.
Rosie - Was the rat dead before the canine intervention?
Pablo - I have a very painful canine right now
Rosie - I should take him to the vet pronto.
Dujon - Or, perhaps, if one is closer, a dentist.
penelope - The rat was deceased, no more. And mummified.
Rosie - Is it really appropriate to mummify a rat?
penelope - Maybe it volunteered - seeking paradise in rat afterlife.
Dujon - No! In my mind 'Ratty' will never die.
KagomeShuko - Was it a female rat? Was it NefRATtiti?
penelope - Hard to say. Shrivelled genitals. More like NosfeRATu.
Pablo - May Zarquon save us all from shrivelled genitals
Rosie - He certainly did the job with Buster Gonad
penelope - Was everyone taken aback by that last one?
Boolbar - I thought it was a load of bollocks.
penelope - *Looks aghast, askance at Bollockbar and faints, faintly*
Dujon - That's it, penelope, hit 'em where it hurts.
penelope - Friday afternoon. What a shocker of a week.
Superman - Here, have a cup of tea. Do you good.
Dujon - This is just to balance the pile. (Sorry, Superman, but it had to be done.)
KagomeShuko - A dog pile? I sometimes have that, literally.
penelope - I have no idea. What's 'a dog pile'?
Boolbar - Is it a carpet made of dog hair?
KagomeShuko - It is Radar and Niblet on my lap.
penelope - I'm still none the wiser. What's that about?
Rosie - You ought to know this, pen - they're pets.
KagomeShuko - Niblet and RAdar can make little barking sounds.
penelope - Ah. Mine's 'Chip' after potato, not the microprocessor.
penelope - Not a peep since Monday. Is everyone OK?
Boolbar - Busy week. Too much work. Please send cake.
Bismarck - Belgium will start lockdown again on Monday. Wonderful.
This was announced on the Friday evening before.
Pablo - Break it! (You've broken the eight word rule...)
Bismarck - [Pablo] That was two eights, you steaming nit.
KagomeShuko - Two eights still break the eight word rule
penelope - [Boolbar] Wilco. I'm in need of cakes myself.
Chalky - Did someone say cake? Is it a home-bake?
penelope - Certainly is. We’re in bake-down here, not lockdown.
Boolbar - I am craving a Victoria sponge right now.
Software - Just had a digestive biscuit, hits the spot.
Rosie - There are no limits to your dietary adventurousness.
CdM - I made fudge.
penelope - [CdM] No, you have fudged. There's a difference.
penelope - And the difference is those five missing words.
Simons Mith - [Bismarck] Penelope shows the double-move loophole, exploited correctly :-)
CdM - [pen] I've consistently rejected this game's fascistic octoverbism.
Rosie - (CdM) A false claim, alas, given your last contribution.
Radox The Green - There may be only eight things worth saying.
CdM - [Rosie] Moves can be eight words by accident!
Pablo - What's happened to the cake? Where is it?
Rosie - (CdM) Only if their numbers have Gaussian distribution.
Chalky - (Pablo) Consumed. There'll be more in good time.
Chalky - Good time. Walnut cake with cream cheese frosting.
Software - Sounds delicious. I'll make do with mince pies.
penelope - I found two mince pies in the fridge.
Superman - How did you resuscitate them after cryogenic freezing?
Raak - That is not dead which can eternal lie...
Raak - I saw the first snow of winter today.
Raak - I just finished a year-old box of paklava.
Raak - Upcoming first trip to London in 10 months.
Raak - Socially distanced Tantra, Titian, Artemisia, Gesualdo, and Sin.
Pablo - Are you okay Raak? I'm just slightly worried...
Radox The Green - [Pablo] Relax, he's gone all ...arty on us.
Raak - The excitement of my life knows no bounds.
Boolbar - As does a kangaroo standing in super glue.
Chalky - Which made me laugh out loud - cheers Boolbar
Pablo - Actually, I haven't had any mince pies yet.
Boolbar - I've just been sent four in the post.
Software - A week to go. Start on the booze.
penelope - I think I've just finished working in 2020.
Rosie - I finished working a long time before that.
Software - So did I. Pass the bottle opener, please.
KagomeShuko - I need to find a new job. now.
Rosie - The Bluebell Railway is looking for engine drivers. reveal
Boolbar - I've 11 days work to go in 2020.
penelope - I finished work for the year last Friday.
Software - All this talk about work makes me thirsty.
Boolbar - I fancy a little bit of cheese: Wensleydale.
Pablo - I fancy a lot of cheese. Port Salut.
Raak - A little bit of bread and no cheese.
Software - Are you trying to give me the bird?
Tuj - [Softers] Just a pear tree. With no partridge.
penelope - The first eight words of 2021 have arrived.
Boolbar - I hope they don't include "Brexit" or "Covid".
Raak - Covid Covid Covid Covid Covid Covid Covid Covid...
Raak - Covid Covid Covid Covid Vaccine Vaccine...A MUTANT!
Pablo - We must burn down more five G towers!
Rosie - I don't think 5G towers are very combustible.
Superman - You have to fire a Qanon at them.
penelope - So what dreadful news can we expect now?
Raak - Trump declares an emergency and suspends Inauguration Day.
Raak - The Covid vaccines prove fatal in three months.
Raak - A deadlier virus escapes from the Wuhan lab.
Raak - The Earth's magnetic poles begin to flip over.
Raak - Aliens arrive, who see us only as food.
Raak - All the bees die and no-one knows why.
Raak - Jesus returns, takes one look, leaves in disgust.
Raak - Wolves, raised in a laboratory to superintelligence, escape.
Raak - Antinatalists release a virus designed to sterilise everyone.
Raak - India and China have a brief nuclear war.
Raak - Skarl the drummer ceases to beat his drum.
Rosie - Waitrose, Sanderstead, have run out of blackcurrant cheesecake.
Raak - Iä! Iä! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!
Raak - Putin annexes the remnants of India and China.
Raak - Trump and Putin get into bed together. Literally.
Boolbar - Putin annexes the Waitrose cheesecake aisle in Sanderstead.
Software - Has Armageddon arrived while I was not watching?
Raak - "And I saw, and behold a white horse."
penelope - Raak, how many coffees did you have yesterday?
Raak - "And the name of that horse was 'Binky'."
Raak - Alas, the coffee runs out, the vision fades.
Chalky - I'm quite exhausted and it's only the 15th
Software - Try retirement, like me and Rosie, you know.
penelope - I'm remodelling my home office. Another 17 years...
Pablo - That's got to be a blockbuster movie, Raak.
KagomeShuko - I like reruns of the Blockbusters game show.
Bismarck - Do you watch it by renting the video?
penelope - "I'll have a P please Bob" *Guffaws memorably*
Software - Well, nobody has posted since penelope nineteenth January.
Rosie - Pen's memorable guffaw has quite simply destroyed us.
penelope - Sorry about that folks. Now I'm straight faced.
penelope - Friday at last. Any giggles to be had?
Software - Friday? Is it Friday, Rosie? Just another day.
Tuj - Haha! Haha ha haha ha. Haha ha... bonk.
Boolbar - I must find an aisle to roll in.
Rosie - It's Saturday, for all the difference it makes.
Tuj - Bonkbonk! Bonkbonk bonk bonkbonk bonk. Bonkbonk bonk... ha.
Pablo - Can anyone help Tuj? Or even want to?
Rosie - Sexual frustration in males (I assume) is terrible.
Tuj - If you've nothing useful to say, try surreality?
Chalky - An ox in shott or head of leather?
Radox The Green - One is the result of the other...
penelope - A game of consequences. Life's like that, innit?
Chalky - Feeble attempt at County punditry * .. whoosh - over heads*
penelope - Got the punditry but had no worthy retorts.
Chalky - Yup I need to cease conjuring wordgames from nothing
Chalky - Some friends and family are understandably disowning me
Rosie - Not over my head, Chalky. Keep it up.
KagomeShuko - Yesterday, a joke went over a friend's head.
penelope - We move in elevated comic circles. What fun.
Chalky - Let's drop our standards and go dirt low
Rosie - Bleed'n' 'ell, I fought you was a lady.
penelope - We'll let that roll off into the distance.
KagomeShuko - Balls roll well when the ground's not frozen.
Rosie - Surely even better when the ground is frozen.
Boolbar - Especially those balls belonging to a brass monkey.
Software - The weather has now taken a warmer turn.
penelope - I thought the heat was just my age.
Rosie - Eighty in the shade, pen? Don't believe you.
penelope - Am I eighty in Fahrenheit or Celsius? Important!
Simons Mith - And how does that translate into dog degrees?
penelope - Dogs always have masters, never bachelors or PhDs.
Tuj - [pen] Applau, applau, applau, and one more applau.
Simons Mith - Dogs are much better educated than I'd thought!
Rosie - How well did you think dogs were educated?
Simons Mith - I thought they mostly stopped with obedience school.
Chalky - The purebreds on to Barking and Dogenham College
penelope - Long old day. Had enough. Turning laptop off.
Raak - In the transhuman future, laptop turns you off.
penelope - [Raak] You're a ray of sunshine today. *Click*
KagomeShuko - Sunshine does not come out until the dawn
Rosie - And in most of Britain not even then.
Pablo - What comes out in Britain is best avoided
Raak - English winter ends in July; recommences August. (Byron)
Rosie - July in Welsh is Gorffenaf, "end of summer".
Boolbar - British Summer is a random week in May.
Raak - The hay fever season is February and March.
KagomeShuko - Louisiana fall is a random day in winter.
Bismarck - Would those all be things that happen... outside?
penelope - Bismarck, how long since you saw real daylight?
Bismarck - Well, not since that accident with Uncle Vlad.
penelope - [Bismarck] I think you got away with it.
KagomeShuko - Sometimes the inside is nicer than the outside.
Chalky - This is indeed true of ripe juicy pomegranates
penelope - But not so true of secretly rotten potatoes
drquuxum - Speaking of rotten, hello everyone; I still live.
Rosie - Stands Pittsburgh as of yore? Good to hear.
Chalky - Dr Q - the man who knew .. techie stuff :^)
KagomeShuko - The Guy With Compupter Know-How - a great song
Rosie - Those words nicely fit The Eton Boating Song.
penelope - Today I have The Rage. Nothing shifts it.
penelope - (Apart from hurling work laptop out the window)
Boolbar - I heard that defenestration is all the rage.
Rosie - (pen) Are you French? La rage is rabies.
penelope - [Rosie] Mais non otherwise I'd speak in italics.
Rosie - That would be a most interesting sound, pen.
penelope - You have to lean in to hear it.
Chalky - Only when you're masking your discernible Tuscan dialect
Pablo - [Chalky] Surely pen would speak in double Dutch?
Software - Single Dutch is difficult enough in my experience.
KagomeShuko - Is a Swedish accent able to help anything?
Raak - Bork bork? Bork bork bork! Bork bork. Bork.
Boolbar - Borg borg? Borg borg borg! Resistance is futile.
Rosie - In that case try capacitance. Much more elegant.
Pablo - Agreed. Nothing like ingesting a few good farads.
Rosie - Don't try it. A farad is absolutely huge.
Software - Quite so, Rosie, but perhaps Pablo is electrolytic.
Bismarck - Some Henrys would make good farad ingesters.
Chalky - Ingesting farads is just taking the Michael surely
penelope - Are farads nice served with a hot sauce?
KagomeShuko - [Bismark], Those are the cutest vacuums I've seen!
Pablo - Farads do go well with a warm tesla
penelope - We haven't had eight words since last week.
Rosie - Well, pen, I've got a new digital piano.
penelope - I thought all pianos were played with fingers.
Rosie - They can be played with anything. Ask Liszt.
Pablo - I play mine with a glass of cabernet
Chalky - Both of ours when the neighbours are out
KagomeShuko - Have we run out of eight word topics?
Dujon - Hardly, m'dear, there is much more to come.
Rosie - Why are the voters of Hartlepool so stupid?
penelope - I don't know. Perhaps they just lost hope.
Tuj - Hartlepool minus "h", "o", "p", "e" equals artlol
Rosie - It could equally be interpreted as "a troll".
KagomeShuko - If they are anything like residents of Hooterville . . .
Rosie - Is Hooterville the American equivalent of Ambridge, possibly?
Tuj - This fist's takin' a one-way trip to Hooterville!
penelope - I have absolutely no idea what Tuj means.
Boolbar - I think Tuj wants to punch somebody's nose.
Raak - I thought it might be about Hooters restaurants.
Tuj - [Bool] Ta! Didn't have the word count to
Boolbar - [Tuj] Yes, this eight word limit is rather
Software - restricting. Is that what you meant to say?
Tuj - [Softers] I think you've hit the nail on
Rosie - The Head of Octology is not amused, unsurprisingly
KagomeShuko - [Rosie] Not really. It's a much sillier place.
penelope - An hour of Dutch conversation class. About Eurovision....
penelope - I have absolutely nothing to say about that.
Superman - There's no point to the Eurovision Song Contest.
Rosie - An opportunity to indulge in mocking. Useful, surely?
penelope - Not when everyone else takes it more seriously.
Software - Especially with the UK up its own arse.
Pablo - We must keep up our nul points record!
Rosie - You must be a supporter of Sheffield United.
penelope - I must stop finishing every glowworm. Bad habit.
Bismarck - This world does not have enough glow worms. reveal
KagomeShuko - Glow worms are larvae of mosquito like flies.
Pablo - [Rosie] No - oddly enough I'm often in Sheffield
penelope - Apparently there's a Sheffieldstraat in Rotterdam. Joins Glasgowstraat.
Rosie - How on earth do they pronounce them, pen?
Bismarck - There's a Sheffield Road in Rotherham, as well.
Rosie - Naturally. They are only a few miles apart.
Chalky - Every South Yorkshire town has a Sheffield Road
Tuj - Is that Yorkshire for "Every cloud... ...silver lining"?
penelope - Just checking: everyone had ice cream this week?
Boolbar - Not me. I'd rather eat nice juicy berries.
Chalky - [pen] I indulged myself with an Oreo cornetto.
KagomeShuko - I ate lots of cookies, not ice cream.
penelope - For those that haven't, I had two yesterday.
Software - Ice cream? I think I prefer a beer.
Pablo - For your sanity, do not mix the two.
KagomeShuko - But, Frozen Pints sells Craft Beer Ice Cream.
Rosie - Nothing would persuade me to buy that stuff.
penelope - Watching online graduation ceremony, end of week treat.
Software - A treat but only up to a degree.
CdM - *clap clap clap clap clap clap clap*
Pablo - That's a clap you owe us, CdM mate.
Boolbar - [Pablo] I guess CdM got rather clapped out.
CdM - I have a reputation to uphold.
penelope - Never mind. Gives me a couple extra to use here.
Rosie - Surely the wordcount is not a transferable quantity.
Boolbar - I've just borrowed eight words for use later.
penelope - Roadworks outside my home office. No peace anywhere.
Chalky - Ditto. Although my home studio is out back.
Rosie - You mean you have to commute to Australia?
penelope - Out tonight. First time for 18 months. Wahoooooooooo!
Superman - Well go on, do tell (if you're back)!
penelope - Colleague moved nearby. Scones and tea au jardin.
KagomeShuko - My friend can't come see me this weekend.
Rosie - Would it be terribly intrusive to ask why?
Chalky - The statement begs the question in a forum.
KagomeShuko - She was not feeling well, so stayed home.
penelope - I think I got away with it. Hurrah!
penelope - No side-effects from second vaccination. Am finally double-Pfizered.
Software - [pen] you did better than me with that.
penelope - Although that makes me wonder if it's working...
penelope - Weekend, folks! Plans? Good newses? Positive check-ins? Hurrahs?
Raak - Baroque concerts (hurrah!), taiko class, artistic composition class.
penelope - I loafed, ate chips, made jam, did ironing.
Rosie - Loafed? A latter-day term for "ate bread"?
KagomeShuko - I've been double Pfizered. Felt blah next day.
penelope - [KagS] Good that you're done. I Pfelt Pfine afterwards.
Tuj - Still three 'narf weeks 'til my second course.
Bismarck - Despite having had Covid, second jab also taken.
penelope - My jabs have matured, going to France tomorrow!
Software - [pen] well done. We're in France in September.
Chalky - I wouldn't touch France with a barge pole.
Boolbar - I wouldn't touch Poland with a French baguette.
Rosie - An overbaked baguette is a pretty fearsome weapon.
Mat - But the penne is mightier than the sauce.
Pablo - "Vermicelli"? Stringed instruments infested with rats, I'm told.
Rosie - Pentre bach yng Nghymru yw Tal-y-ban.
Radox The Green - Food crime: stabbed with a piece of Parmesan.
Raak - [Rosie] Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu yng Nghymru wgah'nagl fhtagn.
Rosie - (Raak) If you say so, my good man.
penelope - [Rosie] Are you channeling Bluebottle, my good man?
Rosie - (pen) Not consciously, m'dear, but as I heard it all first time round it could be in there somewhere, along with lurgi of course.
Software - [Rosie] I guess that you have been sponned.
Rosie - Yes, but I haven't fallen in the water.
Boolbar - [Rosie] Three moves at once. That's so Bohemian!
Rosie - (Bools) Four, mate, positively Moldovan. Please keep up.
penelope - Dunno about you but I'm ready for autumn.
Rosie - Are you feeling mellow and fruity, dear lady?
penelope - Harvest-fattened and mellow, if that's what you mean.
Rosie - Should we interpret this self-assessment with satire?
penelope - Actually I've lost weight. Dog walking, smaller portions.
Bismarck - So your husky has shrunk in the wash?
penelope - No, I usually wear a Barbour for walking.
Superman - I walked to the barber two days ago.
Pablo - So did I. And I regret it now.
Rosie - Was the barber in Blaenau Ffestiniog or something?
penelope - [Rosie] Are you thinking of Shaun the Sheep?
Chalky - [Rosie, penelope) Or quite possibly Shorn the sheep?
Rosie - You will be slated for those remarks, ladies.
Chalky - Always enjoy being recognised as a lady, Rosie :^)
penelope - Which definition of 'slated' Rosie? Uk or US?
Rosie - (pen) UK. 'Twas a joke.. I dunno.. 'Dwn i'n gwbod.
penelope - [Rosie] I see. I'm Google Translate's best customer.
Rosie - (pen) Cymraeg o'r Gwgl? Paid! Pentwr cachu ydy.
Software - L' y'a longtemps qu'jé n'vos avais pon veu.
Rosie - Colloquial Welsh is one thing, colloquial French another.
Chalky - Ark at ee - out west's a proper job
Pablo - I'd do colloquial Australian but no-one would understand
Rosie - Ooh, I dunno, we've all watched Monty Python
Chalky - All? Are you absolutely sure about that Rosie?
Rosie - I can't help it if you weren't born.
Software - Surely everyone knows about the dead parrot sketch?
Boolbar - T'was on the TV by the exploding penguin.
Rosie - Penguin and parrot will be partners in mortality.
penelope - And dictionary neighbours, along with pangolin and panther.
penelope - Back to Blighty tomorrow. Mother's 80th. Family reunion.
penelope - Back home. Three days of cake and champagne.
Software - Back on the lettuce and water diet, pen?
Superman - Were there any problems with the Covid passport?
penelope - None at all. Only Stena asked for it.
nights - Terribly overexcited to see the fun continues online.
Chalky - (nights) Reassuring isn't it? Great to see you
nights - Builders building at eight on a Saturday. Sigh.
Software - Lucky that you can find bnuilders since Brexit.
Rosie - That's a huge finger you've got there, mate.
nights - I only wish they were building for me.
penelope - nights, have you thought of selfbuilding with Lego?
Rosie - That sounds like a dodgy euphemism to me.
nights - Dodgy euphemism or not; a Lego house? Nah.
Pablo - I dunno - tiling must be cheaper with Lego?
penelope - [Pablo] If you're only 18 inches tall, sure.
Pablo - [pen] I am - I was struck by a lift
penelope - [Pablo] Oh. I was struck by a thought.
Rosie - I hope you struck back with characteristic feistiness.
penelope - Happy New Year, Eight-word-smiths and all the others.
Software - Happy New Year, let's hope it really is.
penelope - One week in. So how's it going, folks?
Software - Not so good. My wife broke her foot.
penelope - Ouch. Limping along then. What about everyone else?
Rosie - Feet are unbroken, but not a pretty sight.
Software - [pen] now I have Covid, so not good.
nights - Feet are mullered, but new insoles on order!
Rosie - Mullered? Didn't know you were a German footballer.
penelope - [Softers] Bummer. Hope you don't get it bad.
Software - [pen]how to compare? My throat was sore.
Chalky - Hope the Covid afflicted are on the mend.
Software - Still have a cough and feeling very heady.
penelope - How's everyone doing? Keep taking your vitamins, folks.
Boolbar - The best vitamin for remembering things: Vitamin B4.
penelope - Is that 'B4 I forget to take it'?
Chalky - And more certainly B4 the best by date
Software - Hurrah! I have tested negative. Hope it's over.
Pablo - [Softers] Was that an LFT? Don't count your chickens...
Software - [Pablo] Yes, three in a row, fingers crossed.
nights - Hoorah, outbreak amongst colleagues. Obsessively testing daily, then.
penelope - Clear blue skies, sun shining, Friday. Deep joy.
Bismarck - Anyone want an NFT? Go on, take two.
Rosie - (Bismarck) I must refuse because I can't funge.
nights - I always thought fungible sounded a little racy.
penelope - Fungible - is that like mushrooms? I hate mushrooms.
Mushrooms - *Cries and hides away in some moist woodland*
Pablo - Fungible means "like a bogeyman" - so I'm told.
Rosie - Is this someone who continually picks his nose?
penelope - If I could pick my nose, I'd choose...
nights - Well I certainly wouldn't have chosen this one.
penelope - I would not have chosen that one either.
Software - Michael Jackson picked his quite a few times.
Pablo - Did he use a nosepick? Like a toothpick?
penelope - Colleague bought chocolate croissants. Return to office - hurrah!
Software - Retired, one has to buy one's own cakes.
Boolbar - Still working from home. No sharing my chocolate!
penelope - Working from home alone four days a week.
nights - [penelope] Chocolate croissants? A flogging offence, here, surely.
penelope - I believe they're export-only. Not for domestic consumption.
penelope - Or better to call them pain au chocolat?
Software - With my coffee I had ginger cake today.
Boolbar - Had my first coffee of the year today.
Bismarck - You'll be needing more around half past October.
nights - Nothing would happen in my classes without coffee.
penelope - Nothing would happen in my coffee without glasses.
penelope - Your week in eight words, I'll go first.
Cancelled trip home, booked another, still no rain.
Raak - Saw last half of “Tove”. Trains to blame.
Boolbar - Looking at lovely weather outdoors while working inside.
nights - I'm a workplace agony uncle now, it seems.
Chalky - Covid visited for ten days then thankfully left.
penelope - [Nights] Surely here's safe to share it. Do.
nights - [pen] Kind, but this is my happy place.
penelope - Happy but difficult. I'm stumped on limerick lines.
Rosie - There was a young lass here called pen.
penelope - Well that fails to help MY stumpedness, Rosie.
Raak - Who lived in a mill on the fen.
Pablo - Eight words on a third line? No way.
Rosie - We should try French. Full of silent letters.
Raak - She baked a vleestaart / van struisvogel en hert
Raak - En serveerde het met eieren van een hen.
nights - Saturday morning snow. Not ideal for going marketwards.
Rosie - We had a good snow shower here, too.
Raak - It was a bright cold day in April.
Pablo - Where? Not here in Sheffield I assure you.
Raak - A story in eight words by Augusto Monterroso:
Raak - "When he awoke, the dinosaur was still there"
Raak - But the Spanish original is in seven words.
nights - May the Fourth be with you, of course.
Raak - The fourth word of this sentence is "of".
Raak - The eighth word of this sentence is "anything".
Raak - The ninth word of this sentence does not
Rosie - I contend that that is not a sentence.
Raak - The first rule of Fight Club is that
Bismarck - I've better - the secret of happiness is simply
penelope - Wait! Bismarck! Is there something important you wanted
Chalky - I've never really got this game because everyone
Boolbar - [Chalky] Be like me. I don't give a
Radox The Green - I'm from the police and I'm here to
penelope - One more cup of coffee can't hurt, eh?
Pablo - Not with the sort of posts we're getting
Rosie - There have been no posts for ten days.
Software - There, two posts in just two days, wow!
penelope - The blind man has been. We have blinds.
Software - I see, but perhaps the artisan does not.
Radox The Green - That depends how well he drew them, innit?
penelope - If it wasn't for blinds, it would be...
Superman - ...easy to see what the neighbours are doing?
penelope - ...curtains for all of us, obvs. Oh dear.
Phil - You lot really are all a load of
Pablo - Brilliant minds, as Phil was about to say
Software - Well, another week has passed with many incidents.
pnelope - Incidents? Tornado in Zierikzee (near mill), one dead.
Bismarck - Incidents- storm in Westminster, four resignations, nobody hurt.
Software - Now we have fires all over the place.
penelope - Four more days of work, four more days!
Rosie - I didn't know you were a fireman, pen
Radox The Green - Give us back our ten days of holiday!
Boolbar - It is very quiet. Is everyone on holiday?
Rosie - I am always on holiday. I am retired
Software - We've had guests for the past three weeks.
Rosie - I just can't imagine you as Basil Fawlty.
Pablo - Would perhaps he be better as Manuel then?
penelope - Have you all read the manual? Good, good...
Rosie - I will when I find the English bit.
Software - Guests all gone. Back to normal. Never again!
penelope - Three guests gone yesterday, three more coming tomorrow.
penelope - Guest-free. Home alone. Feels a bit empty now.
Radox The Green - Silence. His Majesty will now address the nation.
Rosie - Hello nation. Get on your knees, you serfs.
penelope - It does all seem a bit old fashioned.
Bismarck - Yo homies, I's a-gonna reign and like it!
nights - "M'sieur are you sad about ze Queen dead?" direct quote from one of my students
Raak - "Eh bien, ça va, mon petit choux, hein?"
Rosie - There appears to be a plurality of cabbages.
Boolbar - [Rosie] That is because we are all heart.
Rosie - That sounds like a very good bridge hand.
Pablo - Are you talking about playing cards or snooker?
Rosie - Could you please frame that question differently, possibly.
Software - Actually, I think that I get the picture.
penelope - The picture I get is impressionistic at best.
Pablo - Are you talking about Debussy or Monet then?
Rosie - B flat is still B flat, you know.
Software - Yes, even when the rent increases above inflation.
penelope - I'll end this week with eight words. Maybe.
penelope - I'll end this week with eight words. Again.
Software - [pen] you seem to be a regular weekender.
penelope - [Softers] I do it every week. Don't you?
Software - [pen] no real need since I have retired.
penelope - Shall we have a break from eight words?
Boolbar - We could try four. But do it twice.
Bismarck - Two words! Four times! Two words! Four times!
CdM - One.
Software - Two, three, four, five, six, seven.
penelope - I'm sad we can't ever waltz in here.
Tuj - Start!
One two three, one two three
Stop!
Rosie - Waltzing, pen? I'd only tread on your toes.
penelope - [Tuj] Was that the minute waltz? Quite small...
Software - The foxtrot, that's a short gait I imagine.
Bismarck - Repetitively, but without hesitation, the fox trotted overdog.
Rosie - But what sort of fox was it, Bis?
Bismarck - An American cluster fox. It brings bad luck.
penelope - Failed. Not one mince pie passed my lips.
Boolbar - [pen] Not to worry, I had your share.
Chalky - Mini ones are best - more pie less mince
penelope - Still haven't made any mince pies. Ruddy Covid.
Tuj - This year, I propose that we try to...
Rosie - Arrange a pilg. What sayeth ye, fellow humorists?
Chalky - Is thou humouring us, Master Of The Rose?
Rosie - I can barely master dandelions, let alone roses.
penelope - It has rained constantly, steadily, relentlessly, all day.
Some Passing Ducks - [pen] Lovely weather for this time of year.
Bismarck - [Pen] That's not the sea rising, is it?
Software - Don't worry, Holland has plenty of good dykes.
penelope - I think you'll find they're actually called dijks
Software - [pen] I was not thinking of water barriers.
penelope - [softers] I was ignoring your inappropriate thought processes.
Chalky - We're moving to another street
Software - All of you?
Rosie - Such blatant numerical dissonance I have rarely seen.
Pablo - Kentucky legislating to make pi equal four, maybe?
Rosie - Pi was three point two in Indiana, 1897.
Radox The Green - Ha! I remember when we had REAL constants.
Rosie - Are you suggesting that current constants are imaginary?
penelope - [Chalks] Need to update my ancient Filofax then!
Radox The Green - [Rosie] No, just variable, and hence not constant.
Radox The Green - That seems to have successfully killed the conversation.
Software - Then shall we start another topic of conversation?
Tuj - I like hazelnuts. What is your favourite nut?
Rosie - One without rounded edges. You can undo them.
KagomeShuko - Cashews are easily the best nuts in existence.
Software - Cashews are not nuts, technically they are drupes.
penelope - Chocolate-covered brazils. But also walnuts. And peanut butter.
Bismarck - Only nuts in a date-nut-apple loaf are suitable.
Chalky - [pen] Change of address is on its way
Pablo - Are we forgetting pecans? Then shame on us!
Bismarck - Try writing while Chopin's Ballades are being played.
Rosie - Shurely it depends on who is playing them.
Software - Another month has passed, it'll soon be Christmas.
Tuj - I'm thinking of a word beginning with P.
Bismarck - Pish! Prime persiflage partially precluding proper purple prose.
Rosie - Cumulonimbus clouds can congregate continuously, causing certain catastrophe.
Pablo - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Rosie - Careful, I'll do one in Welsh - all Y's.
Boolbar - Yesterday your young yellow yaks yielded yummy yoghurt.
KagomeShuko - Perhaps people pursue pleasures precariously practicing private pilates.
penelope - Eight days a week. Eight words a month.
Tuj - This game is, somehow, almost 17 years old!
Chalky - Somehow [adverb] - in some way; by some means.
Software - Well, well, well. How time does fly, then.
nights - Especially when you don't log in that often!
Radox The Green - I burnt my diary. Finally, something to write!
penelope - Check the beginning - look how young we were!
Chalky - [pen] and quite funny back in those days
KagomeShuko - Are we not still young and funny people?
Boolbar - I am still. I don't move much nowadays.
penelope - I got older yesterday. Ate too much cake.
Bismarck - Proficiat! Just in time for the holidays, too.
Chalky - Happy Belated Greetings dear pen - sorry I'm #rubbishonFacebook
penelope - Thanks Chalks. Baked myself a cheesecake to celebrate.
KagomeShuko - I've never had a baked cheesecake. Just refrigerated.
Chalky - Cake's not real cake unless it's baked *controversial*
Rosie - Baked then frozen, like Waitrose blackcurrant cheesecake. Wonderful!
penelope - Mmmm baking. But holiday is over, diet time.
Rosie - There's much talk of food in this game.
Chalky - I talk it more than eat it nowadays
Rosie - In that case you should be on telly
penelope - [Rosie] When will autumn arrive? I'm too hot.
Rosie - (pen) That's an unusual remark for a woman.
KagomeShuko - The heat in Louisiana has caused forest fires.
penelope - [Rosie] Most menopausal women chant that mantra incessantly.
Raak - [pen] Thought at first you meant KagomeShuko’s comment.
Superman - We should ensure to post every three days.
CdM - Done!
penelope - Well... you've done *something*, not sure it's enough.
Rosie - I would say that it is heptaverbally deficient.
CdM - It's been eight days, people! Pay attention!
penelope - Supplementary-word-that-gets-us-back-on-track.
CdM - [pen] Sorry, what?
Bismarck - Gaaah! He's done it again!
Rosie - I think CdM should be lynched tout suite
Software - The weather has changed again, now it's raining.
Rosie - The weather has changed again, now it's stopped.
penelope - The weather has stopped? Are you Chicken Licken?
Rosie - I have just had a water meter fitted.
Raak - Saturday felt like August. Today felt like November.
Radox The Green - [Rosie] For monitoring your use or your production?
blamelewis - "It is vitally important to get a receipt."
Rosie - Here, the "p" is silent, as in bathing.
Software - At my age a p is very frequent.
blamelewis - Just don't get yourself stuck in a q.
penelope - P before you get stuck in a lift.
Software - There are more Qs in the ladies, though.
Rosie - Speak nicely and mind your P's and Q's.
KagomeShuko - Eat "Ps" with honey; keep them on knife.
blamelewis - All we are saying: give "Ps" a chance
Bismarck - Wishing you a better 2024 than 2023 was.
CdM - Happy New Year, everyone! May we start the year as we mean to continue!
Rosie - Does anyone here live in Pease Pottage, Sussex?
Tuj - There once was a man from Pease Pottage...
Raak - Who lived in a tumbledown cottage (problem looming...)
blamelewis - His roof lay agape (Indeed. How to pad?)
penelope - In a circular shape (Just keep going chaps)
Rosie - So heating consumed a huge wattage
Raak - ...(The end.)
Pablo - Nice to be back after a long absence
rab - If only the server code wouldn't rot so.
Rosie - Does it smell when it goes off, then?
penelope - What does bad code smell like? Suggestions please.
Software - I have a bad code, maybe it is 'flu.
Bismarck - Let's have a toast to the absent members.
penelope - Is anybody absent? Would you make yourselves known?
Rosie - I'm not here but I am all there.
Radox The Green - I'm all here but I'm not all there.
Chalky - I'm here, there and everywhere - like a beetle
Software - Chalky, did you not really mean a Beatle?
penelope - Chalky works at least eight days a week.
Chalky - That'll all stop when I'm sixty four, Pen
Rosie - You'll be eight squared but I'm nine squared.
Pablo - Eighty-one square feet? Bigger than I thought.
penelope - I'm 7.61577310586 squared. Still too long to retirement.
Bismarck - 1966 in my view was a vintage year.
Chalky - You're a rebel just for kicks now
Tuj - Chalky, you rebel! Did you mean "You are"...?
CdM - [Chalky] Chalky! Welcome to the resistance!
Rosie - And while we're about it have some capacitance.
Pablo - There doesn't seem to be anything current here
Tuj - I am still in shock from CdMalky's volt-face.
Rosie - I do hope none of this is terminal.
Chalky - Not likely. I'm now on a trans mission.
CdM - Watt are you all on about?
Chalky - If you ask me 'tis a circuitous route indeed
Software - Chalky, I see you are joining the wokerati.
Rosie - Whoa! Karate can be a very painful pastime.
Pablo - As is Farnarkling, so I have found out
Pablo - Ignore the bolding....not properly awake yet begorrah...
CdM - Pablo! I didn’t know you weren’t Irish!
Pablo - I'm not - don't know where that came from
Rosie - Equally, I am not Welsh, indeed to goodness.
Chalky - Neither I a Scot, hoots mon
CdM - Whereas I am half-Welsh and half-Scottish, Duw Duw the noo.
Chalky - That places you in the County of Eee-by-Gum
CdM - Chalky! You've come so far. No backsliding!
Bismarck - I am divided into three halves, all non-English.
penelope - What's your definition of a half? Think again!
Rosie - (pen) maybe Bismarck is including his other half.
Software - Is it your round? I'll have a half.
Pablo - This is obviously a game of two halves
Bismarck - reveal
Chalky - Pure bred here. But no Kennel Club certificate
Software - Does that mean that you can go dogging?
Chalky - As my beloved dog died last week - no :^(
CdM - [Chalky] So sorry to hear that. :( Have a *hug*
Radox The Green - Are you going to get a new one?
Why not take a stand?
B I P HR