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World's Worsest
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Start with World's Worst Chat Up Lines, till it wears out then start a new topic.
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"Have you ever danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight?"
Time for another topic, I think

World's Worst Thing To Say To Your Child's Teacher
He's very advanced, you know - he knows how to use Log Tables.
No I haven't taught him to walk or talk, that's your job!
We don't believe in constraint or restricting his natural creativity. So for the last four years he's been running wild in the garden, learning from nature.
(To a kindergarten teacher:) Are your lessons intellectually rigorous?
Forgive me, I've heard it's true my child has to share a class with those of inferior races. This surely isn't true?
He's almost potty-trained.
So? May I see your report?
Don't you worry. It's just the measles he has. You can just excuse my Paul from gym class while the other kids are there. That's all.
Could you please put her in for early GCSEs? I know she's only four, but there must be a waiting list we can join?
I'd happily help on Sports day but the judge said I shouldn't be close to children.
Sarah cnat be dyselctic! It dosen't rnu in our fmaiyl.
I want this child statemented for additional support and I want it now. What do you mean, diagnosis? You must have something on your list he's got.
What d'ya mean Jimmy need to stay after school for remedial grammar lessons? He don't need no grammar lessons- he speaks English as well as I does.
Can Tommy be excused PE? He hurt himself in our last satanic worship ritual.
"He's been reciting the bowling averages for every Hampshire cricketer since 1948? Well, I've taught him everything he knows about that."
I know there's a dress code. But Billy insisted on wearing his sister's dress and a hair bow to school this morning and I am a firm believer in non-confrontational childrearing. So I couldn't refuse him, could I?.
"Those scars around his lips? Well, when we think he's being too noisy, we sew his lips together."
"Gooooooood morning, sir" Though maybe only aging Aussies will understand that.
You're a teacher? Oh, teach me, teach me. Please teach me.
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