The count has been counted, Returning Officers have returned, and party rosettes have been trampled underfoot in the Town Hall Chamber at the end of election night. Get your glad rags on for the Local Party Election Victory Ball at the Town Hall Ballroom, 7.30pm for 8pm, black tie, carriages at midnight. But there are bound to be one or two late-comers...
Please now welcome Ms. Bristolcream hand-in-hand with someone, whose hand is it she's holding? Oh yes, it's her brother Harvey's; and now here comes Mrs.Ishwhisky with her husband Ira.
Here's Ms. Ness with her fiancee from Marseilles Guy; followed by Mrs. Aner-Dunkelweisse and her husband Paul and from Quebec here come Mr.Sonlager and his wife Molly, affectionately known as Mol.
Maybe it's time for a new set? How about Late Arrivals to the Shakespeare Enthusiasts' Garden Soiree? Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to our annual garden party felicitating the Bard of Avon! I am pleased to announce the arrival of Mrs. Ornottobe hand-in-hand with her little boy Toby, followed by her daughter Beth and husband Mac.
Now arriving, Ms. Morelovely and Ms.Moretemperate with their mutual friend Art and here's Mrs. Lock and her little daughter, oh she's so shy, as is Mrs. Budsofmay's little darling - they too have just walked in.
From Italy, please welcome Ms. Ofverona who's accompanied by two gentlemen, and now here come Mr. Tonio with his wife Ann, and his good friend Mr. Anio who's here with his wife Bess.
Now let's give a well proportioned welcome to Mr. Sureformeasure and his wife May , Mrs. Net who's accompanied by her son and Mrs. Zabethan and her husband Eli.
Coming up from the cellar Mr and Mrs N KRANTS and their lovely daughter ROSE, closely followed by Mr STEIN who has just tipped me a GUILDER. (cheeky sod not even legal tender now!)
Here come Mr. Ados and his wife Barb, Mr. Apolis and his wife Minnie, Mrs. Pelago and her husband Archie, Mrs. Tucky and her husband Ken, and finally Mr. Apagos and his gal.
Please welcome Mrs. Jave and her husband Mo, Mr. Livia and his wfe Bo, Mrs. Bleland and her husband Ara, Mrs. Ora and her son and Ms. Kistan and her Pa.
Now arriving Mr. Ence and his wife Flo, Mrs. Inburgh and her husband Ed, Ms.Rdeen and her beau Abe, Mr. Mentaryrock and his wife Sadie, Ms. Acabana and her fiance- he's a cop, and Mrs. Islava with her fidgety, whining little boy - boy, is he a brat!
Welcome now Ms. Ifornia and her husband Cal, Mrs Pinemeadow and her husband Al, Mrs. Ghazi and her husband Ben and Mrs. O'Mites with her little girl- she's such a little doll.
Now arriving are Mr. Bai and his Mum, Mr. Rradelfuego and his lovely wife Tia, Mrs. Enhagen and her husband, he's a cop, and Mr. Gota, accompanied by his lovely wife Bo.
Please welcome Mr. Tinentaldrift and his son Con. Heralding the arrival of Mrs. Wan and her daughter Tai, sorry, the young lady is now married to Mr. Pei. Late as usual we have Mr. and Mrs. Skye and their lovely daughter Isla.
Here's the gangster Don Davia accompanied by his moll, followed close on their heels by his ex-moll Ms. Ube, all dressed in blue, accompanied by her new gangster beau, Dan, and ahh, here come the Polis sisters, Anna and Minnie A.
Here come Mr and Mrs River and their two sons, Niall and Clyde. And following close behing them is Mr Issippi and his unmarried daughter, the beautiful Miss.
Look who's now arriving- it's none other than Mr. Jevo with his wife Sara, Mrs Aragua and her husband Nick, Mrs. Vador with her lovely daughters Elle and Sal; oh! here come Master Raguay and little Miss Kistan who're both here with their Pas , Mr. Aide whose arrived with his lady Adele, and finally the henpecked Mrs. Oya with his wife- she's a real nag!
Here comes Mr. Ir with his wife Pam, Mrs. Otho has just arrived accompanied by her hubby Les; Oh! here's Mr. Tok and his gang, and now arriving Mr. Tucket and his lovely wife Nan and his daday, affectionately known as Paw and finally Mrs. Bany who's arrived with husband Al.