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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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[Dujon] ("Wiered" I don't know about, but "wire" is definitely a hint.)
Located in the UK?
The Forth Rail Brige?
Well, it is apparently the 8th wonder of the world...
The Gateshead Millennium Bridge?
The wibbly-wobbly bridge, aka the London Millennium Bridge?
Ironbridge?
A suspension bridge?
[Juxtapose] Not in the UK.
[FGZstar] Not the Forth Rail Bridge.
[INJ] Not the Gateshead Millenium Bridge.
[jim] Not the wibbly-wobbly London Millenium Bridge.
[Software] Not Ironbridge
[INJ] Yes, a suspension bridge.
In the USA?
In Europe?
[jim] Yes, in the USA.
[INJ] As above, not in Europe.
Golden Gate Bridge?
[Juxtapose] Yes, The Golden Gate Bridge it is! The bridge does have electrical connections primarily for lighting, and while its primary purpose is not to move, it can move during severe weather conditions. During the winter storms in 1982, the main span bowed and swayed approximately 6 to 7 feet. The baton made up of intertwined wire cable is passed.
I shall have to stop switching rapidly between this and 'Where am I' since I had it in my head that we were in the UK - wrong game!
I am afraid I am a bit to blame for that one, sice I created the latter. What do you think of it, by the way?
Easily confused
[FGZstar] I was worried it would just be a copy of this game, but it has taken off at a bit of a tangent. I think there's room for both.
Okay, all, get ready to be stumped with a

VEGETABLE

.
Is it alive?
Is it edible?
Wood?
A Cucumber?
Tree stump?
A specific plant?
Found in UK?
A bail?
Wicket?
Found on a farm?
The Answers:
[Alive?] This could be debated, but I will say Yes.
[Edible?] No.
[Wood?] No.
[Cucumber?] No.
[Tree stump?] No.
[A specific plant?] Yes.
[Found in the UK?] No.
[A bail] No.
[Wicket?] No.
[Found on a farm?] No.
A specific individual plant?
A Member of the cactus family?
A very ancient tree?
Found in Africa?
Insectivorous?
More Answers:
[A specific individual plant?] No.
[A Member of the cactus family?] I don't believe so.
[A very ancient tree?] No.
[Found in Africa?] No.
[Insectivorous?] Not to my knowledge.
A tree?
Used as a symbol or emblem?
'This here's the Wattle, the emblem of our land
You can stick it in a bottle, you can hold it in your hand
Kelp?
Begins with a P?
Better late than never
Mainly found in the tropics?
Is this a plant that, apart from its natural environment, is considered as a weed?
Les Réponses:
[A tree?] No.
[Used as a symbol or emblem?] I would call the answer emblematic, but as far as a nation's flag or team logo or something, No.
[Kelp?] No.
[Begins with a P?] YES.
[Mainly found in the tropics?] Mainly, no.
[Considered as a weed?] Certainly considered a nuisance.
Poison Ivy?
Primrose?
De Antwoorden:
[Poison Ivy?] No.
[Primrose?] No.
An aquatic plant such as pickerelweed?
A specie of thistle?
οι απαντήσεις:
[Aquatic?] No.
[A specie of thistle?] No.
A bush or shrub?
I thought irach had got it.
Pommegranite?
Coniferous?
Th' Ans'
[A bush or shrub?] No.
[Pom?] No.
[Coniferous?] No.
A type of grass?
BTW, when responding to 'Found in X' questions are you replying on the basis of 'native to' or 'at least 1 example grows there'?
Known for its flowers particularly?
FAQ
[A type of grass?] No.
[Known for its flowers particularly?] No.
[BTW] I have been trying to answer the questions as they've been asked. The VEGETABLE is not _mainly_ found in the tropics, and is _not_ aquatic. This may mean that at least one example may be found in tropical climes, but it means that it definitely does not grow under / in water. Is this what you meant?
Palm Tree?
Seed bearing? (as opposed to spore-bearing?)
Q&A
[Palm Tree?] No.
[Seed bearing?] Unknown. Applause from a single audience member who then wilts under the glares of the others
Nasty in some way such as prickly or poisonous?
Pipe-weed, a Middle-Earth plant, (smoked by hobbits with bad habits), as mentioned by JRR Tolkien ?
Does it have leaves?
Clarification on 'found in' is fine thank you
Answering Machine
[Nasty in some way?] Quite. A bit of laughter.
[Pipe-weed?] No. A lot of laughter, applause, and murmuring.
[Does it have leaves?] Yes.
Can it be smoked (and unlike Bill Clinton's claimed experience with a particular weed), actually inhaled?
A tobacco plant?
Ans her? I just met her!
[Can it be smoked?] No.
[A tobacco plant?] No.
Is any part of it edible?
Should we be paying attention to your aproposeses?
Does it "eat" insects?
Given that two of the last three questions have already been answered can we have a summary?
A dicotyledonous plant?
I apologize for the gap in answers, life has been a blur for the last two days.
Is it pineappleweed?
Pineapplweed
Is it a real, currently living plant?
Growing on the Earth, not extinct, not fictional (though that should be Abstract).
[Juxt] - Apology accepted, but you could have answered the outstanding questions at the same time.
Late Answers
Haste prevented me at the time. I have a terrible habit of remembering things only when I have no ability to address them.
[Is any part of it edible?] No.
[Should we be paying attention to your aproposeses?] I have attempted to relate accurately the reactions of the audience.
[Does it "eat" insects?] No.
[A dicotyledonous plant?] Unknown.
[Pineappleweed?] No.
[Is it a real, currently living plant?] No. As to category, I took my cue from Irach's latest outing - Fictional human, categorized simply as "Animal".
Summary
Vegetable. Alive by certain definitions, inedible, a specific plant, not found in the UK, not an individual plant, not a cactus, not an ancient tree, not found in Africa, not mainly found in the tropics, not aquatic, possibly an emblem, not a bush or shrub, not a thistle, not a type of grass, not known for it's flowers, definitely nasty, has leaves, cannot be smoked, not insectivorous, possibly a dicot, possibly seed-bearing, not a real, currently living plant, starts with P.
Not: wood, cucumber, a tree stump, bail, a wicket, kelp, poison ivy, primrose, pomegranate, a palm tree, pipe-weed, pinappleweed.
Found on earth?
Thanks for the summary
Hmm, irach got a bit of criticism for his categorisation at the time. But, then I don't claim to set the rules for this game.
Must be a ptrifid
But obviously isn't, i.e. I'm stuck.
Was this plant invented by JK Rowling?
Answers
[Found on earth?] No.
[ptrifid] Pno.
[Potter-ed plant?] No.
Phantom Fungus?
Is it from a book?
I have a horrible feeling that I'm not going to have heard of this one.
Is it from science fiction?
Aaaaaanswers.
[Phantom Fungus?] No.
[Is it from a book?] No.
[Is it from science fiction?] No.
Would this be a Paleozoic plant (e.g. a Progymnospermopsida)?
From a TV series?
Nswrs
[A a Paleozoic plant?] No.
[From a TV series?] The VEGETABLE has appeared in more than one tv series, but that is not the original source.
Puking tree of Mozambique?
Just clutching at straws now...
From a game of some sort?
Potato?
Getting warmer
[Puking tree of Mozambique?] No, but I wish I had picked that instead.
[From a game of some sort?] Yes!
[Potato?] No.
Pikmin?
I know nothing of Pikmin save the name, but it turned up on Wikipedia's list of fictional plants, so it's worth a try.
Piranha Plant?
See Jim's comment.
From "Plants vs Zombies"?
Fireworks
[Pikmin?] No, but an excellent guess
[Piranha Plant?] YES! Audience goes wild. The pipe-dwelling sharp-toothed menace from Super Mario Brothers. I'm sorry, but the baton appears to be in another castle. Please accept this 1-Up mushroom instead.
Well - never played the game, or seen anyone play it (actually I've never owned or held a games console, bizarre as that may seem to some people).

After that short interruption in services we restart with MINERAL with ANIMAL connections

A building?
[CdM] edifice? - NO
Means of transport
Mineral in its natural state?
[FGZstar] Lead balloon? - NO
[Rosie] Mineral in its natural state? - Hmm, I think the answer is YES, but I'm not sure what you mean by the question.
Metallic?
A fossilised material with embedded animal?
Made by man?
Fictional?
Mount Rushmore?
Where did that come from?
[FGZstar] - Metal? - NO
[Dujon] Fossil (with bits in)? - YES! (well, you could argue that it isn't a fossil and doesn't really have embedded animal - but that's being picky) (huge applause)
[GLogin] Man-made? - NO
[Juxtapose] - Invented? - NO - that would have been Abstract ;-)
[jim] Mt Rushmore? - NO
Crude petroleum ( "fossil" fuel) ?
[irach] Eau de Gulf? - NO (the audience is looking much more subdued)
A particular individual fossil?
[CdM] Individual fossil - YES (if you accept it's a fossil)
Begins with a "P"?
[pirach] The Tuj question? - There is at least one word begining with a 'P' on the card
A coal pit?
(Earlier question) I meant say, iron ore as opposed to stainless steel.
[Rosie] T'Pit? - Nay Lad - My answer to your earlier question stands, though it may be misleading.
Precambrian shale?
Does the answer include reference to a resinous preservative?
A geological feature?
The ruins of Pompeii?
Now on display at Fratton Park.
Homing in
[irach] Remnants of the pre-cambrian explosion? - NO
[Dujon] Resinous? - NO
[CdM] Rocky? - NO
[Rosie] Don't you think there's a bit more smoke than usual up there? - strictly speaking, NO, but the huge applause means that it's only fair to say that the word 'Pompeii' is on the card.
The Piltdown Man?
Pompeii and Herculaneum?
following Rosie's lead.
[FGZstar] You can't see the join? - NO
[Software] Pompeii and Herculaneum? - NO (the audience subsides)
An apology and correction
The response to Gusset Login's question some time ago - 'Made by Man?', should have been 'YES - to some extent'. I don't think it's actually put you much off the scent.
Pompeii ash?
Or the casts of the victims buried by Pompeii ash?
Nearly there
[irach] Put that cigarette out! - NO
[jim] Casts of victims - YES, but still needs a bit more precision
"Pompeii Plaster Casts" of victims
So close
[irach] You need to consider the answer to one of CdM's questions. If yours had been the words on the card I would have given the baton to jim.
The reconstruction of Pompeii and Herculaneum?
So we're talking a specific cast of a specific victim, then?
A plaster cast of a man-made object?
The man made plaster cast of the "Dog of Pompeii"?
To cut to the chase:
irach has it. It is The dog of Pompeii
I feel I lost the plot a bit there in that, although I knew when I set it that the object was a plaster cast of the natural void where the dog had been, I got that confused with a petrified object in some answers. Sorry.

A plaster cast of where a baton once was is passed on to irach.

Hot-diggity dog! Canis diggiti-calidae!. Me again? The next one is ABSTRACT with ANIMAL and some MINERAL connections.
Fictional?
The Adherence of the Repeated Meme?
[GLogin] Umm...hard one to answer...The entire phrase on the card is fictional in its overall abstract sense, but is based on a very real entity or phenomenon.
[FGZstar] No Meme. Not by a long shot.
Something to do with space travel?
A saying?
Single geographic location?
[Dujon] No space travel involved.
[Juxtapose] Yes, a saying.
[Software] Not a single geographic location.
Is the animal a domestic pet?
Raining cats and dogs?
[ImNotJohn] Definitely not a domestic pet, except to perhaps the most intrepid pet owner.
[Software] See above; therefore not feline and canine showers.
An Elephant in the room?
[FGZstar] No pachyderm involved, in the room, or otherwise.
Is the answer the title of some artistic work?
The cow jumped over the moon?
[CdM] No, not the Moo-na Lisa or any title of an artistic work.
[Rosie] A good guess, but no bovine-lunar connection here whatsoever.
Does the answer involve action, essentially?
Sneezing?
Is the animal an existing non-human species?
A Chinese proverb or an Aesop's Fable?
Is the animal, as it were, a fierce creature?
[Rosie] There is a verb signifying an action of some sort on the card.
[Dujon] Not sneezing.
[CdM] Yes, an existing non-human species.
[FGZstar] Not a Chiness proverb or Aesop's fable.
[jim] The reputation of the animal in question is definitrly fierce and/or scary.
Is the animal a member of the cat family?
Is the animal doing something that it would habitually do in the wild?
The lion was not so much fierce as was painted.
[Juxtapose] Not a feline.
[Gusset Login] In the literal sense, yes, doing what it does in the wild; in the abstract sense, not really.
[FGZstar] Not leonine.
Is it a mammal?
Live with wolves, and you learn to howl?
Does 'cooling the blood' come to mind?
[jim] Not a mammal.
[FGZstar] See above answer, therefore no. No Mowgli, or any dancing wth wolves.
[Dujon] Nothing involving an subtantial "cooling the blood" as far as I am aware.
Is the animal a shark?
[CdM] Not a shark.
Crying crocodile tears?
A Fish out of Water?
Is the animal an insect?
[GussetLogin] Not piscine.
[CdM] Not an insect.
[ImNotJohn] You got it! The exact words on the card! "Crying crocodile tears" it is! The crocodile baiting hook is passed.
Coo - me again!
Well, I was going to edge myself towards it, but I decided just to have a stab.
This one is simply Animal
Human?
[Software] Human? - YES - (I have awarded myself points for guessing the first question - and what do points mean?)
Alive?
Get the obvious ones out of the way...
Topical?
Points are measures of cider in Somerset, according to Jack Dee half an hour ago.
An association with football?
Raol Moat?
Female?
Younger than thirty?
[jim] Still with us? - NO
[Rosie] In the news? - NO, not particularly
[irach] Football Association? - NO
[FGZstar] Relate's man of the year? - NO
[CdM] Distaff? - NO
[Juxtapose] U30? - YES for 29 years and 364 days, then NO.
An author?
[irach] Author! Author!? - NO (he did have published and even prizewinning works, but that's not what you would know him for)
A clue!!
Aha! So his 30th birthday did not occur in the last ten months of a leapyear, or in the two following months!
Politician?
I knew I should have checked that
I was in a hurry, OK? However, the answer to Juxtapose, should have been 'YES for 29 years and 365 days, then NO'
[Projoy] Politician? - NO
An artist?
Nobel prize winner?
Albert Einstein?
[Rosie] Arty-farty? - NO
[Software] Up there with Kissinger? - NO
[FGZstar] Mrs Einstein's relative? - NO
Scientist and/or engineer?
[irach] Practical type? - NO
Born prior to 1850?
Disraeli?
[CdM] pre-1850 - NO
[SM] Dizzy? - NO
That's 9 NOs in a row, let's go for double figures.
Composer?
Political figure?
And on we go
[Rosie] Composer? - NO
[irach] Politician - NO (except in the very vaguest of senses - never elected, never held any political office)
Alfred Wainwright?
(Although I think you would have called him an author. He does fit the leapyear criterion, though!)
[CdM] The late great AW? - NO
Begins With a P?
Someone known for one particular feat?
Aww! You've spoiled it
[FGZstar] aka Tuj? - There is a word beginning with 'P' on the card (but you could get the answer without knowing that)
[CdM] One-hit-wonder? - YES (I'm sure he'd disagree, but history is cruel)
Royalty?
[FGZstar] Royalty? - NO *a little stirring in the audience*
The Artist Formerly Called Prince?
[Software] Tafkap? - NO
A religious figure?
[Irach] God-botherer (or god)? - NO *sounds of snoring from the audience*
A musician?
Nobility?
A sporting personality?
Progress
[FGZstar] Music Man? - NO
[GLogin] Nobility? - YES (well aristocracy, at any rate)
[CdM] Sporting Personality? - YES *a few exchanges of glances in the audience mixed with applause*
Pele?
[FGZstar] Senhor do Nascimiento (etc.)? - NO
Died in or around Munich?
British?
[FGZstar] Died in Munich? - NO
[irach] True Brit? - NO
The Nawab of Pataudi?
[Software] The Noob? - NO
To clarify: the audience reaction to the 'Sporting Personality' question needs to be borne in mind. I wasn't sure whether to answer yes or no to that question. Pele and the Nawab of Pataudi would definitely be Sporting Personalities.
Died within the last 20 years?
[FGZstar] Still warm? - NO
Died within the last 50 years?
[FGZstar] Died in last 50 years? - NO
A chess player?
American?
Percy McDonnell, or a Cricketer at least?
Under fifty years old at the time of death?
[CdM] Chess player? - NO, mate.
[irach] Yank? - NO
[FGZstar] Any of several thousand cricketers with a 'P' somewhere in the name? - NO (remember I said you wouldn't need the 'P' to get the answer - since I'm not going to insist you match the words on the card exactly)
[Juxtapose] Died young? - NO
A small clue in the form of a clarification: if CdM's question had been 'Sportsman?', the answer would have been 'NO'.
A sports commentator (in either a broad or narrow sense of the term)?
[CdM] Bill McLaren etc? NO (He would probably have said YES in the very broadest sense, but that's not why he's known)
A member of some sort of sporting organisational body, possibly the president?
Warming up
[FGZstar] Member/President of sporting organisation? - YES *Applause* You could quibble with the exact description but it's absolutely in the right area.
President of a sporting organisation?
Founder of some sporting organization?
Pierre de Coubertin?
[Rosie] Nice guess. I think you're right. At least it does seem to fit all the answers.
[Rosie] Correct! the words on the card are Pierre Frédy, Baron de Coubertin

One baton in the shape of a laurel wreath passed on.

Bit of a lurker's easy victory, given the clues. It had to be Coubertin, or possibly Jules Rimet.

Right - this one is essentially ABSTRACT.

Fictional?
(FGZStar) - NO, not fictional.
A scientific concept?
Artistic connection?
Yes, I thought it was pretty clear after FGZstar's key question. Interesting how difficult it was to home in on the area of importance.
Can you touch it?
I'm not saying anything. Whilst I concede that Rosie stated it first, I still must admit that I dislike the lurker's victory. No hard feelings, however, as I was convinced that the person in question had died within the last 50 years. I really must pay attention to the answers provided to my questions. I was thinking that it was a later president, anyway.
(CdM) - A scientific concept? - Hmm, the description is, but strictly NO. Nevertheless *cheers and applause from the audience*.
(FGZStar) - Tangible? YES, very much so, Gary.
It's normal to make some acknowledgement of a lurker's victory. The problem this time was that people were asking the questions before I had a chance to do so myself.
Electronic, possibly some form of microprocessor?
Is the thing that can be touched animal, vegetable or mineral?
Just trying to clarify the mysterious abstract but tangible.

It wasn't remotely a lurker's victory. Rosie had asked three prior questions in the round -- and even if he hadn't, he's a regular in the game, and the odd lurker's victory by a regular is no big deal. It's in the nature of AVMA that sometimes (probably most of the time) one person does the heavy lifting and opens up the answer for someone else.
Could this relate to silk cloth and glass rods?
(FGZstar) - NO, not electronic.
(CdM) - YES, one of the three, and most familiarly all three. The word on the card is Abstract in essence but can have a physical manifestation. Thanks for the endorsement, BTW.
(Dujon) (aside) He speaks in riddles. The answer is NO anyway.
Is the thing the sense of touch itself, as in the sense, which is tangible because it only exists when touching something?
(FGZstar) - NO, not the sense of touch.
Does the answer on the card contain a verb?
Air?
(Juxtapose) Contains a verb? - NO. Two words + the indefinite article.
(FGZstar) - NO, not air.
A printed document?
It's not another saying, is it?
(Software) - "Thank you for shopping at the Co-op"? - NO, not a document.
(FGZstar) - A saying? NO, not this time.
Does this have both a metphorical and literal meaning?
(CdM) Both metaphorical and literal? - NO, literal only.
Is it related to a physical phenomenon?
(INJ) - Related to a physical phenomenon? - In one particular case, YES, but otherwise the general answer would be NO. *some polite applause from certain members of the audience*.
Related to a specific emotion?
Would this, Rosie, describe some possible future event?
(Juxtapose) - NO, nothing to do with emotions. The abstract nature of the answer is of a completely different sort.
(Duj) - NO, not to do with the future.
Present in everyday life?
A naturally occurring phenomenon?
Essentially ephemeral?
(FGZstar) - Present in everyday life? In one sense, YES, but more realistically, well not really.
(CdM) A naturally occuring phenomenon? Well, not really a phenomenon but an otherwise honest answer is YES. *some vigorous applause*
(INJ) Ephemeral? Not really applicable but in some cases most certainly NO.

Then answer is one example of an abstract property of a material or imaginary object.

Affecting the colour or shape of the object?
(FGZstar) - Colour or shape of an object? YES. *vigorous applause*
A fuzzy navel?
(FGZstar) - Big Boy's Belly Button? Not really. Not at all, in fact.
Is it something that most people here will have experienced in some way?
Is it specifically just to do with colour?
A black look?
(CdM) - Experienced by the average Morniverser? - Mmm, difficult, that. You don't really experience it, but another answer could be YES.
(INJ) Specifically to do with colour? - NO.
(Softers) - If looks could kill - NO.
Specifically just to do with shape?
(FGZstar) - Just to do with shape? - YES. *Huge applause*
A square peg?
(irach) - Square peg - NO, nor even square.
A convex slope?
The fellwalker's curse.
A round belly?
A black hole?
Making the rounds?
A sharp edge?
A love triangle?
(INJ) - Can't see where I'm going? - NO.
(FGZstar) - Fat bastard? - NO.
(Softers) - The gateway to oblivion? - NO.
(irach) - "And how are we today?" - NO. (Not metaphorical).
(INJ) - Honed to perfection?- NO.
(all) - Equilateral promiscuity? - NO.

The answer is simply a shape, with no specific object implied, though one particular object strongly suggests itself.

A perfect circle, or a perfect square?
(FGZstar) - Circle or square? - NO
Is this some sort of crystaline structure?
(Dujon) - A crystalline structure? - NO.
Is the shape in question 2dimensional?
An oblate spheroid?
Diamond shaped?
(FGZstar and irach) - NO, because CdM has it. Well done. It's an oblate spheroid, a sphere that's fat round the middle. The obvious example is the earth, but any planet really, because they all rotate.
I hand the angular momentum to CdM.
ABSTRACT with ANIMAL, VEGETABLE and (perhaps) MINERAL connections
Starts with P?
P-begun? No.
Is the vegetable component a fabric?
Darwin's Origin of the Species?
Whole cloth? No.
Talking about an evolution? No.
A theory or hypothesis?
Theory or hypothesis? No.
Is the vegetable component usually a carrot?
Carrot? No. *audience laughter*
Phrase or saying?
Phrase or saying? No (technically I suppose the words on the card are a phrase, but not in the sense I understand you to mean).
A book?
Is the animal connection human?
An activity or event?
[FGZstar] I did the Origin of Species about 10 clues back...
Literary? No.
Oh, the humanity!? No.
Doing something? No.
Are the animal and vegetable elements edible?
Animal and vegetable elements edible? Yes. *some applause, mainly because the audience was getting bored*
A recipe?
A recipe? No.
Is the edibility of these elements important to the words on the card?
In other words it's not just happenstance.
The importance of being Edible? Yes *applause*
A knuckle sandwich?
Meat and two veg?
A square meal?
Mineral salt?
a TV dinner?
What, fisticuffs? No.
Filet mignon a la Bearnaise, mousseline d'asperges and chips?* No.
Pavé de boeuf? No. *some audience laughter*
See how they run? No.
Masterchef? No.

*Which is a reprise of the answer I gave last time someone tried that guess in an AVMA I was setting
A snack?
A 3 course meal, or 4 square meals a day?
Is the answer a description of a meal?
A nutritional concept?
Does it relate to a diet?
Afternoon elevenses? No.
Aperitif, main course, digestif OR breakfast, lunch, dinner, another dinner? No.
Mealy? No.
Nutritional? No.
Weight watchers? No. *laughter*
Just to clarify - my previous question was not restricted to a weight-loss diet.
A fat chance?
Does it relate to production rather than consumption, i.e. agriculture etc.?
Obesity?
Diet of worms? Still No.
Fluffy dice? No.
Production rather than consumption? It doesn't particularly relate to either. It doesn't have any connection to agriculture.
Obesity? No.

I think you need to ask more questions. You are going down some very specific lines of guessing based on very little information. So far, just to reprise, the only useful positive information you have is that the animal and vegetable connections refer to something that is edible (and that the edibility is relevant rather than incidental).
A figurative meaning?
Figurative? I think the expression on the card may occasionally be used in a figurative sense, but the best answer is No.
Any literary or artistic connections?
Arty? No significant literary or artistic connections that I am aware of.
I'm trying to think of a clue. One route to the answer is certainly by trying to find out more about the edible connection. In another sense, though, this idea is broader -- I could have specified essentially the same idea without any necessary reference to food at all.
"To live off the fat of the land"?
Fatland? No. Pretty clearly figurative, that.
Would the edible part be offensive in any way to either Jews or Muslims?
Not koshalal? No.
Is the aminal/vegetable connection a concoction of some kind (e.g. 'Toad in the Hole' or 'Haggis')?
Concoted? The AV connection is a prepared foodstuff of some kind, yes. *some scattered amused applause*
s/concoted/concocted. Also, by "foodstuff" I do not mean to imply a single ingredient (obviously enough, since there are both animal and vegetable connections).
To do with greed?
Is the foodstuff heavily processed?
Greed-related? You could perhaps make a connection but the best answer has to be No.
Heavily processed? Well, ingredients are combined and then cooked in a certain way. If that counts as heavily processed, yes. The ingredients themselves are also for the most part processed to some degree.
*retires for the nonent*
I love aminals
Does the answer describe a type of behaviour?
Spam?
Type of behaviour? No.
Spam? No
Curry related?
Vindaloo? No.
Do the words on the card describe an item?
An item? I suppose the answer is Yes, though "item" seems a slightly odd word in this context, given that the words on the card are describing something abstract.
By the way, as a follow-up to Rosie's question a while back, googling the phrase on the card does turn up one figurative use, and there may be others. But the one that shows up on a google search is pretty arcane (I'd never heard of it, and I would have been more likely to have come across it than most people here). So I don't think hunting for the figurative use will get you anywhere.
Eh?
Eh? No.
Anything to do with linguistics?
Linguisticky? No.
(I don't think this one is inherently terribly difficult. It's just no one has yet come up with a question that unlocks it in any real way. And no, that's not a clue.)
Any connection with politics /public affairs?
Connection with politics? No. (Actually, the figurative meaning that I alluded to earlier is associated with a particular public policy question/debate, but as I said, I really can't imagine that will help you.)
Can this be used to help people in everyday life?
Useful? No.
Any connection with economics?
Connected to economics? No.
Is it lickable wallpaper?
Lickable wallpaper? Nope. Not abstract enough.
When I was originally thinking of setting this I wanted to describe it simply as "this has animal, vegetable and mineral connections". Then I descided that it was still technically abstract.
Is colour involved?
Colour? No.
Is the food a dessert?
Progress!
Dessert? Not usually a dessert as such, but (almost always) sweet rather than savoury.
Food Pills?
Cake?
Food pills? No.
Cake? No (but a *smattering of applause*)
A sweet tooth?
Sweet tooth? No.
Brioche?
I'm sure I've seen an episode of QI in which Stephen Fry said that Marie Antoinette actually said "Let them eat Brioche, and so I wonder if that is the thing you are referring to?
Brioche? No. *another smattering of applause*. A reminder that the words on the card refer to something abstract, however.
As for let them eat brioche, I have seen that too. However, I actually ended up researching* that story recently, and discovered that historians think it unlikely that Marie Antionette actually said anything of the sort.

*Wikipedia
A croissant?
I did see something about a mathematical formula for a croissant shaped tissue expander, and thought it could maybe be that.
Croissant? No . *the smatterers provide another smatter, but more out of habit than anything else*
Pain Au Chocolat?
Pain au chocolat? No. *smatter*
breakfast?
Any type of pastry?
Is the shape of the foodstuff significant?
Breakfast? No, though this is frequently a breakfast foodstuff.
A pastry? Not technically, but sort of in the same space.
Significantly shaped? Yes! *the audience leaps to their feet and gives a relieved standing ovation*
Doughnuts?
Mmmm... Donuts....
The word doughnut appears on the card, yes. But remember you are looking for something abstract. *applause*
The hole in a doughnut
OK then!
Excuse the double post - but I left it nearly an hour
Phew!
The hole in a doughnut is correct! One baton bent into a circle and joined at the ends passed on. Not sure why that one took so long...
OK - I think it was to do with the abstractness of the answer which nevertheless had to be defined purely in terms of the non-abstract 'frame' (so to speak).
Anyway, having dealt with that without licking my lips I give you:
primarily VEGETABLE with Animal and Abstract connections
A turnip shaped like a thingy?
Any artistic connection?
[jim] Turnip for the books? - NO (Funny you should say that, because I've got....)
[CdM] Artistic connection? - YES *Sharp intakes of breath amongst the audience*
Made of wood?
Tracy Emin's bed?
Unique?
Decorative?
A form of pigment (e.g. paint)?
A lovely bunch of coconuts?
[Raak] Ligneous? - NO
FGZstar - Open to all-comers? - NO
[CdM] One is one? - YES
[Rosie] Ooh innit nice? - NO
[Dujon] Hogment? - NO
See them all a-standin in a row? - NO
Floral?
[Phil] Bloomin lovely? - NO
[flerdle] - sorry, didn't mean to miss your name off - have a clue as an apology:
I could have described it as Animal, Vegetable and Mineral with Abstract connections but thought the actual definition I used was more helpful.
Made of some sort of vegetable fibre?
A sculpture of someone made from vegetables?
Or the annoying orange?
[Raak] High-fibre? - YES
[FGZstar] Oh, you mean the sculpture is made from vegetables - NO
[ditto] Sarky seville? - NO (don't really understand the question, but I'm sure of the answer)
Fictional?
[jim] Made-up? NO (I'm one of those pedants who would call a fictional object 'Abstract')
Paper based product?
[Software] Papery? - NO
Clothing of some kind involved?
Are copies of the item available for purchase?
The 2012 Olympic Mascot?
Found in most households?
[FGZstar] clothing? Hmmm. I think I'm going to answer NO, but I could easily justify YES as well.
[CdM] Have you got that in pink plastic with fairy lights? - YES
[FGZstar] The Olymprick? - NO
[Phil] Domestic normality? - NO *some chuckles in the audience*
Is it worn for ornamental purposes?
[Raak] Prettifying? - NO *some more chuckles in the audience*
In case I didn't make it clear, the audience found my answer to CdM's first question controversial - some of you may think the same.
Used for recreational purposes?
[Phil] Plaything? - NO *audience etc.*
Is it larger than a telephone-box-sized representation of a toaster?
[CdM] Will he stop talking if I press this lever? - YES, Probably and NO
Made of cotton?
(CdM, INJ) I've told you two boys......
Are the copies the same size as the original?
Rosie] Really reely? - NO
[Raak] Life-size copies? - NO (in the vast majority of cases at any rate)
A building of some kind?
Should your answer to my previous question be interpreted as three answers, one for each dimension?
[FGZstar] A (very small) building? - NO?
[CdM] 3D? - YES (greater in 1 dimension, about the same in the 2nd and less in the 3rd)
(That's than a telephone box not a toaster.)
Is it foldable?
Is it rigid?
[CdM] Pliable? - YES *the audience is looking interested*
[jim] Board stiff? - NO
Is it a tapestry?
[Software] Gobelinish? - NO *a little ripple*
Closing in
I think this may now well be guessable from the information you have.
A rug, possibly sheepskin or shagpile?
Or a red carpet?
[FGZstar] Not any sort of floor covering.
Curtains, or maybe padded silk wallpaper?
It's all there, you know
[FGZstar] Decor? - NO
Check out CdM's first 2 questions again
Some form of designer Jute bag?
[FGZstar] Bagette? - NO (Not exactly unique)
Did the earlier audience reaction indicate that some would view this as a work of art but others would disagree?
[CdM] Yes, but is it art? - YES (and not on aesthetic grounds)
Tie Dye?
[FGZstar] Aging Hippie stuff? - NO *faint snoring heard from audience*
Has it been in a museum/gallery?
Is the colour(?) of this black?
Is this item located in Europe?
[Phil] In a museum/gallery? - YES (to a fairly broad interpretation of the words - it has been on public display.)
[Dujon] Black? - NO
[CdM] In Europe? - YES
I'll clarify my answer to Phil's question. To my (or wikipedia's) knowledge it has never been in a museum or art (or other) gallery. However it has on occasions been on public display in a dedicated space.
Is there writing on it?
[jim] Written on? - NO (actually there are claims that there is some writing on it, but I didn't know that when I set it - it's certainly not what you would think of).
Is there a religious significance to the item?
Aha!
[Phil] Imaginary friends? - YES *Prolonged and relieved applause from the audience*
The Shroud of Turin?
And the winner is...
[irach] You got it. The Shroud of Turin it is!

One slightly singed baton passed on.

[ImNotJohn] Thanks, but I am going to busy and away on business the next couple of days, so I'd like to pass the baton on in turn to Phil, who I really think was on to "The Shroud of Turin" as well with his question pertaining to the "religious significance" of the words on the card. So, Phil, it's all yours...
Ow!
*kicks self*
...third attempt to post without being interrupted
[irach] You really are too generous. I wasn't THAT close to the shroud, but I did have a feeling it was some kind of religious artefact. Given your unavailability and kid offer, I will gladly take up the baton on your behalf, for the first time in absolutely yonks!
Right, let's go for MINERAL, sometimes with a little vegetable
Is the vegetable wood?
Any precious minerals?
[Raak] Wood? YES, but not exclusively
[FGZstar] Precious minerals? NO
A naturally occuring substance?
A manufactured object?
Is the vegetable unintentional?
A geographical feature?
[Dujon] Natural? NO
[Rosie] Manufactured? YES
[Gusset] Accidental vegetable? NO
[INJ] Geographical feature? NO
Some form of building?
Maybe a skyscraper such as the empire stste building?
Bigger than a 4-slice toaster?
[FGZ] A building? NO *some interest from the audience*
[INJ] bigger than 4 slice toaster? YES, in all 3 dimensions
Is it a unique object?
A statue or Sculpture?
Maybe lady liberty?
A garden object?
Made of stone?
Is it primarily functional?
[jim] Unique? NO
[FGZ] Statue? NO
[Rosie] Garden object? NO
[GL] Primarily functional? YES *a tiny suggestion of applause*
Can you pick it up with one hand?
A signal of some kind?
Begins with a P?
[Raak] Pickupable-onehandedly? NO *giggles from audience*
[FGZ] Signal? NO
[Tuj] P...... ? NO
Made of concrete?
(Also, you missed INJ's related question.)
A steam locomotive?
[Rosie] I think that's what the psychiatrists call "transference".
Apols to [INJ] Made of stone? NO
[CdM] Made of concrete? YES *applause*
[Rosie] A steam loco? NO. alas
Unique?
Can a person go inside?
[Software] You think all but one have been destroyed since Jim asked?
Some other form of structure?
Such as a bridge?
Normally seen in groups?
(Rather than being used singly)
Usually found outside?
A concrete bollard?
[CdM] doh!
[Software] Still unique? NO
[CdM] Can a person go inside? YES *some applause mixed with mutterings from the audience*
[FGZ] Other form of structure? YES *same mix of sounds from the audience again*
[INJ] Seen in groups? NO
[GL] Usually outside? YES *gentle applause*
[Software again] Bollards? NO
Does it have an industrial purpose?
A shelter of some kind?
(CdM) Transference? Of course. But up to that point it fitted. :-)
A shed or barn of sorts?
[INJ] Industrial? NO
[Rosie] Shelter? NO
[irach] Shed/barn? NO
About the same size as phone booth?
A bridge?
Possibly tower bridge?
[irach] Phone booth sized? NO
[FGZ] Bridge? NO
A tunnel?
[Rosie] A tunnel? NO, but a tunnel might be incorporated.
A sewer?
A tube station?
Possibly the one that must not be mentioned as it would cause a game end sequence?
[GL] A sewer? NO
[FGZ] Tube station? NO *audience starts to lose interest*
A highway or rail route?
[irach] high- or rail-way? NO
Time for a summary, methinks.
The words on the card relate to something that is Mineral, often with a little vegetable
Positives established are:
  • The vegetable portion is wood
  • It is manufactured
  • bigger than a 4-slice toaster in all 3 dimensions
  • primarily functional
  • made of concrete
  • A person can "go inside"
  • some other kind of "structure" (other than building or statue/sculpture)
  • Usually outside

Negatives established are:
No precious minerals; not naturally occurring; no accidental vegetable material; not a geographical feature; not a building, not unique; not a garden object; not made of stone; can't be picked up in one hand; not a signal; doesn't start with P; not a steam locomotive; not seen in groups; not a bollard; not industrial; not a shed/barn; not a shelter; not phone-box-sized; not a bridge; not a tunnel per se (but may incorporate a tunnel); not a sewer; not a tube station; not a highway nor a railway.

The audience were appreciative of it being outdoors, primarily functional and made of concrete. They were given to debate amongst themselves as to whether a person could go inside, or whether it was a form of structure. I am, however, confident of saying YES to both of these.

A subway?
Some form of outdoor furniture?
Possibly a bench or picnic table?
[Raak] Subway? NO (MAY incorporate a tunnel, but not in the majority of cases)
[FGZstar] Outdoor furniture? NO (a person can go inside?)
A dam?
A cooling tower?
Any military connection?
[FGZstar] A dam? NO (it's not industrial)
[GL] Cooling tower? NO (ditto)
[INJ] Military? NO
Would a person normally go inside it?
[jim] Hmmm...*reconsults dictionary*
Hidden textinside (n): on the inner side or part of; within

Would a person normally go inside it? YES is the potentially misleading, but correct, answer.
Agricultural?
Not sure if it would count as industrial, so a grain silo?
A concrete overcoat?
Were these things ever made before the 20th century?
When you are 'inside' it, is there a roof over your head?
A cellar?
Concrete Boots?
[FGZstar] Agricultural? NO
[GL] Concrete overcoat? NO
[Raak] Made before 20th century? NO *Audience re-awakens*
[INJ] "inside" = "indoors"? NO *applause*
[Rosie] Cellar? NO
[FGZstar] Concrete boots? NO
A sports stadium?
Would this be found in a Winter Olympics competition?
A wall of some sort?
[Rosie] Sports stadium? Using Wordnet's definition
Hidden texta large structure for open-air sports or entertainments
 YES (other dictionaries would lead to "NO, not strictly" being the answer) *Best applause yet!*
[Dujon] Winter Olympics? NO
[Raak] A wall? NO
Half pipe?
As in skateboarding
[GL] A half-pipe? NO *rapturous and enthusiastic applause in anticipation of an early conclusion*
A sewer?
A skate park?
Blatantly taking off Gusset Login's guess, here.
[Software] A sewer? Hmmmm...that's still a NO, as nothing has changed since Saturday :-)

[jim] We have a winner! - a skatepark (or skate park) it is!

Hidden textI got a skateboard for my birthday, which I'm calling a midlife crisis on a budget. I used to be quite handy on a skateboard in the late 70s, but kick-flips, ollies etc hadn't been invented then

So, one baton with its jeans hanging off passed on to jim
[Phil] Just a quick query - why is that concrete and wood? The one I know best is all metal - I suppose the wood could be the boards.....
[INJ] Metal skatepark...hmmm I've not come across one. All the ones I know are concrete, with the odd wooden ramp thrown in for old-times' sake (plus some trees and fencing). I've now done some further searching and found that you are right. I was working mainly from a quote from a skateboarding magazine that concrete is the industry standard these days. My apologies if that threw people completely off the scent.
Ooh, is it me? OK, I am thinking of a ABSTRACT, with animal, vegetable and mineral connections.
Animal connection human?
Fictional?
Related to the arts?
[Humanimal] Yes.
[Pulp fiction] No.
[Arty farty] You could say so, but in the way "The Arts" is generally understood, the answer is no.
A published work?
A human construct?
(oblig)
A geographical feature?
[Crime and publishment] No.
[Constructive] Yes.
[Geomantic] No.
A phlosophical idea/concept/construct?
Related to any form of government?
The pledge of allegiance?
[Eeeeeeeeeeemannuel Kant...] Nope.
[Governmental] No.
An engineering design of some kind?
Related to the sciences?
A phrase or saying?
[Engine ears] No.
[Scientism] In the same way as it's related to the arts, i.e. not really.
[Rearrange the following...] No.
Is the animal connection a single specific human?
A concept?
[Singularity] Nope.
[Conceptuality] No.
Is this an action?
[Action this] Not an action as such, although there is a particular activity involved.
Waterskiing?
[Waterskiing] Nope. Firefox doesn't even think it's a word.
A deliberate 'no ball' in a game of cricket?
Sorry, sorry, I'll go away now.
Some kind of sport involved?
[Duj] Please stay, daft guesses keep the game running.
[Goebbels] Nope.
[Sporty] Not unless you're using a broad definition of "sport".
A certain type of position?
Does the action mentioned involve large numbers simultaneously?
Connected with human interactions?
[Assume the position] No.
[Large numbers] If "large numbers" means what I think it means, then yes.
[Interactivity] Yes, human interactions are involved.
Some signs of interest from the audience, mainly due to finally getting a couple of affirmatives
A flash mob, or maybe a mexican wave?
Would this be a board game?
The Glastonbury Festival?
I think that's its proper title.
A historical event (or series of events)?
[Flash ... AAAH!] No.
[Bored game] No.
[Festival of Mud] No, but you're getting warmer.
[Hysterical event] No. Well ... no.
Some members of the audience are nudging others awake
Some form of festival?
Woodstock?
[Festivities] Yes. Audience applause
Edinburgh Festival?
A Music Festival?#
The Edinburgh Fringe?
Related to food or drink?
[Auld Reekie] Nope.
[The sound of...] No, although there is music involved.
[Fringey] No.
[Alimentary, my dear...] Yes. Audience applause
The GBBF?
[GBBF] YES! Audience goes wild. The Great British Beer Festival it is! One slightly sticky baton passes to INJ.
Well, that's what my previous question had had in mind, so I don't feel too guilty about asking 2 questions in a row - and I did leave over an hour between guesses.

So the next one is ABSTRACT with Animal Connections

Does animal = human?
[FGZstar] Human animal? - YES, mostly.
Fictional?
[GL] Tall tales? - YES
A traditional tale such as Little Red Riding Hood?
Well this is going well
[Rosie] Once apon a time? - YES (with slight reservations)
A Hans Christian Anderson story?
Aaah, you've spoiled it.
[FGZstar] Danish and Scandinavian books? - NO
On a religious theme?
[Raak] God-bothering? - NO is easily the best answer
Made into a Walt Disney film?
Made into a non-disney animated film?
Related to knights in shining armour?
Aesop's Fables?
[FGZstar] Walt disnae? - NO
[GL] Other animated film? - NO *some murmuring in the audience*
[Duj] Tin Men? - NO
[Rosie] Aesop? - NO *a small ripple of applause*
The audience is definitely awake after that series of questions.
La Fontaine?
[Raak] The Urinal? - NO
Was this tale known in antiquity (say, BC anywhere)?
[Raak] BCE story? - NO, on current evidence.
Babes in the wood?
[FGZstar] Pre-freudian paedophilia? - NO
Anthropomorphised animal(s)?
[Rosie] Bunnykins etc.? - NO
Greek connection?
One of the canterbury tales?
[Phil] Attic? - NO
[FGZstar] Chaucerian? - NO
Collected by the Grimms?
[Raak] Eeh it's Grimm? - NO *the audience is settling down again for a long haul*
The Chronicles of Narnia?
Is the human part of the animal part a part of a partitioned animal (in the sense, say, of a centaur)?
The boy who cried wolf?
Going off at a tangent
[FGZstar] Religious metaphors? - NO
[Dujon] Part man, part ....? - NO (If I hadn't done some research, I would just have answered 'YES' to the 'Human?' question - so it's probably not a helpful angle)
[GL] Serial false alarms? - NO
Both animals and humans in the story?
[FGZstar] Animals & Humans? - Animals are not significant in the answer
Attempting to adjust orbit:
Something to do with 'artificial intelligence'?
Good thought, but actually getting colder
[Dujon] AI? - NO
A porky pie?
[Software] Coo, what a whopper? - NO (Well, it's fiction, but I assume that isn't what you meant)
A clue: There is one word on the card with no article.
Related to a television program?
[Juxtapose] Boxy? - NO *a few chuckles in the audience*
Is the answer on the card the name of a mythical/legendary/fictional 'person'?
Well, it's been a bit quiet in here of late.
I thought you'd all gone to sleep
[Dujon] Mythical Person? - YES *the applause from some of the audience wakes the rest*
Rumplestiltskin
Shrek?
[FGZstar] I'll guess that name in 3? - NO
[Software] Schrecklich? - NO
None of the guesses have really been in quite the right genre, although you've got close to identifying it a couple of times
Magical in some way?
[FGZstar] Just like that!? - NO *A very few audience members purse their lips*
Is this word also the title of a book?
[Dujon] Eponymity? - NO
Blair?
Which, you may ask.
[Software] Journeyman? - NO
You really don't know enough to be guessing actual names/answers. I'll try to think of a hint.
You don't know language/culture, location, author, time set/written/drawn/sung, symbolic importance, etc. - some of these would help (but possibly not all)
Written by a british author?
Start with the hard one, why don't you?
[FGZstar] British author? - Tricky one. I don't know. YESish is probably the best answer, but if there was a single author it's doubtful if they would have considered themself British.
An Anthology of short stories?
[FGZstar] Short stories? - NO (technically the person does appear in a collection of stories, most of which are short, but yes would lead you wildly off-track)
I'm going to be offline from later this evening until Sunday evening (for reasons known to people on Dan's site). I'll pop in again in a couple of hours.
Rhyming?
.. anxious not to offend
(ImNotJohn) Should I be asking 'people on Dan's site' why you haven't returned?
Sorry about that
I've just spent a week away in the South-West, but although I had my laptop and 3G card I had no connectivity at all. Anyway, back now, so:
[Spangle] Rhyming? - NO (actually, I'm not quite sure of that, but I would be surprised if it were). I will attempt to get a definitive answer, but assume NO
Where are we?
Who am I?
A Superhero?
[Software] Ubi? - On a speck of dust
[GL] Quis? - You are Gusset Login and I claim my £5
[Spangle] Superhero? - YES, though possibly not in the sense you're thinking of.
Originating before 1000AD?
Ooh, a question!
[Phil] 1st millennium? - This could be one of 2 questions - I'll answer them both.
YES - the mythical person referred to is from pre-1000CE
NO(ish) The written work(s) referring to the person are post 1000 (but with internal evidence of earlier works)
Merlin?
[Software] Rolls Royce? - NO
Noah?
OK, I'm down to guessing now. Sorry.
Is this something to do with the bible?
[Dujon] Noah? - Ah NO.
[FGZstar] Biblical? NO
I know that I didn't help by my absence, but I'm surprised that this has got so stuck. I think you need to pin it down to a culture/location before guessing names.
Related to the Egyptians?
Imhotep? (Actually an Architect)
From Asia?
[FGZstar] - Egypt? - NO
[GL] Asia? - NO
Europe?
[GL] European? - YES
Germany?
Ancient Greek character?
Nordic?
[GL] Germanic? - NO
[Phil] Lost in the attic? - NO
[Software] A Thor point? - NO
UK?
Aha!
[Phil] UK? - YES (primarily) *the sole remaining member of the audience applauds*
Is the word 'magician' relative to the answer?
Is one of the authors Malory?
[Dujon] Magician-related? - NO
[IS,P] Malory? - NO
Regal?
Bat's dos. I notice that Knnnnniggets in armour was already a NO. Duuuh.
[IS,P] Royalty? - NO (at least the named character is not a monarch although there are connections to royalty)
A person from legend/fable?
Thank goodness for that!
[Phil] Legendary/fabulous/almost Beckhamesque? - YES
Male?
Beowulf?
(I know it's not right, but I'm hoping I might learn something from the audience reaction.)
Merlin?
[Phil] Male? - YES
[CdM] - Beowulf? - NO *the audience are all awake again and looking expectant*
[Spangle] Merlin? - This would be a different Merlin to the last one that was suggested and not a magician, I assume? - Still NO I'm afraid
Pryderi?
Getting closer
[CdM] Pryderi? - NO (he would have got a Yes on the Regal question)
From Celtic legend?
Finn MacCool?
Nearly there
[Phil] Celtic? - YES
[Spangle] Finn MacCool? - NO *the audience is torn between loud applause and gathering up bags, coats etc. ready to head for the exits*
Cuchulain?
A male legendary character from the UK, pre 1000AD, written about post 1000AD, one word, Celtic, not royalty...hmmm, don't think I'm right, but I need to rule Colin's Dog out.
[Phil] - YES CUCHULAINN it is!
The non-human element referred to the physical changes that affected him in battle when he suffered a beserker frenzy and turned into a sort of monster. As for the rest - exactly as you said - UK because he is mostly associated with Ulster.

A dusty cobwebbed baton handed on to Phil

Gosh - I was aware of the Ulsterness, and thought the animal smidgen might refer to his name, and status as Culann's hound (hence "Colin's Dog", which was a name I used in a few MUDs many years ago).
This time I'll go for ANIMAL
Human?
Mammal?
Merely a fall-back question should the answer to FGZ* be 'no'.
Single specific human/mammal/something else?
[FGZ] Human? NO
[Dujon] Mammal? NO
[CdM] A specific instance of a creature? NO (presuming I've interpreted the question correctly)
Aquatic?
Currently extant?
[Raak] Aquatic? NO
[INJ] Extant? YES
Reptilian?
[Dujon] Reptile? NO
Avian?
Dodo?
Naturally occuring in the UK?
[GL] Extant, not extinct.
Puffin?
Damn these eyes. I must get them replaced.
[INJ] Avian? YES *applause*
[GL] Dodo or puffin? NEITHER
[jim] UK-native? NO
A bird of prey?
[Raak] Bird of Prey? NO
Generally found in a watery habitat?
Waders, gulls, waterfowl etc
Flightless?
Parrot?
[INJ] Found in a watery habitat? NO *a smattering of laughter*
[GL] Flightless? YES *more laughter, mixed with applause*
[Software] Parrot? NO
Alive?
As opposed to, say, cooked.
Native to the continent of Oceania?
My first instinct is to say 'Kiwi'
Ostrich?
Turducken?
[INJ] Alive? NO *the distant echoes of previous laughter are replaced by rapturous applause*
[FGZstar] Native to Oceania? NO
[Software] Ostrich? YES-ish, but not the answer on the card. more applause*
[GL] Emu? NO
[jim] Turducken? eh? *sound of Phil googling* Ah! NO, alas.
A clue
The answer on the card is three words, one of which is the indefinite article.
A wild goose?
[Raak] A wild goose? NO
To clarify - perhaps my answer to Software should have been YES, rather than YES-ish. It's not the complete answer, though.
An ostrich egg?
[CdM] An ostrich egg? NO *much applause for two words out of three*
I'm predicting there will be at least one more incorrect guess :-)
sommat do with flaming resurrection?
An ostrich omelette?
Ostrich Egg Omlette?
being more precise
An ostrich steak?
[Dujon] Phoenix? NO
[GL] Omelette? NO
[Software] OMELETTE? NO
[Raak] An Ostrich Steak? YES - the very words on the card! I was expecting feather first. Please accept this low-cholesterol baton of ostrich meat.
Yum. The next is VEGETABLE and MINERAL.
Vegetable = wood?
A hammer?
[Software] Not wood.
[GL] Not a hammer.
Is the mineral metal?
[INJ] Not metal.
Is it man-made?
Edible?
[GL] Yes, man-made.
[Software] Edible? the audience murmurs, wondering how the referee will adjudicate this Strictly speaking, no.
Is the mineral liquid?
[INJ] It is liquid.
A nice cup of tea?
[jim] Not a nice cup of tea (but some applause from the audience).
The brew of a witch?
Is the vegetable paper/card?
[Dujon] Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble? No.
[INJ] Not paper/card.
A pint of beer?
[Software] Not a pint of beer.
A really bad cup of tea?
Containing alcohol?
[jim] Not bad either.
[Spangle] No alcohol.
Is it something that people normally choose to drink?
[GL] Yes, people drink it. (Hence it not being "edible".)
Normally drunk hot?
[INJ] Normally hot.
Associated with a particular place or culture?
[CdM] Particular place or culture? Um...very broadly. We're not talking about boiled yak's milk or infusion of Patagonian lemurs.
Ovaltine?
Used on occasion to promote sleepiness?
Cafe au lait?
A triple venti decaf skinny mocha latte with one shot of hazelnut syrup and whipped cream?
[Projoy] Not Ovaltine.
[Dujon] laughter Does not promote sleepiness.
[irach] applause! Not café au lait.
[CdM] Not, erm, that thing you said.
Contains coffee?
Is coffee?
I'll have a double espresso please.
[INJ] *applause*
[GL] *more applause*
[INJ] *cheering in the aisles* Of the 40,000 ways to prepare an infusion of Coffea arabica, it is indeed a double espresso. One stainless steel lead-weighted rosewood-handled coffee tamper passed on.
Coo
Moving along quickly then. This one is:
ABSTRACT with Mineral (and arguably Animal and Vegetable) connections
A human concept?
[Software] That human question? - YES
Is the mineral stone?
[CdM] Stony? - YES and NO (but more NO than YES)
Fictional?
[CdM] Fictional? - NO
Begins with T?
Unique?
Specifically cultural?
Ends with Y?
[Puj] FirstT? - YES (ish) - I would accept an answer with an initial T although it isn't the first letter on the card
[Dujon] Unique? - YES (at least as a human concept)
[CdM] Neither specifically cultural nor culturally specific in the normal sense of those phrases.
[GL] Yending? At last, an easy question - NO
Something people do?
[Software] An Action? - NO
BTW I've just looked again and technically 'T' is the initial letter on the card, but that's because it's the definite article.
Two word answer incl the definite article?
[Spangle] The Answer? - NO
(4, 5 or 6 words will be accepted - the 6 word version is on the card and starts with the definite article)
Confused enough yet?
Actually I can also think of a 2-word answer that I'd accept as well.
Does the answer contain a superlative?
Does the answer contain a number?
Do any of the words begin with P?
[Raak] Bestest? - NO
[jim] Numeric? - NO
[GL] P-ness? - YES
Scientific?
A geographical feature?
Does the answer involve damming?
[CdM] Boffinology? - YES *considerable audience applause*
[Raak] Geography? - NO
[Dujon] Dam your eyes? - NO (where did that one come from?)
A scientific law or theory?
Related to theoretical physics?
Related to applied physics?
Completely unrelated to physics?
[jim] law/theory? - NO
[CdM] Theoretical? - YES
[Projoy] Applicable? - YES
[GL] Unrelated? - I think you can guess this one;-) - NO
Does this have to do with standard weights and measures?
[Raak] Weights and Measures? - NO (well, actually it has got quite a lot to do with them, but not in a helpful way)
Might we poor souls who aren't very scientific have actually heard of this?
Rephrase: Is it a phrase or saying that is in common usage?
[Spangle] Well known to us poor non-scientists? - YES (I promise you'll know this). As to the rephrase, I wouldn't really call it a phrase or saying, but it is in common usage.
Does it have to do with levers?
[Raak] Momentous? - NO
Does the word Principle appear on the card?
[CdM] You should know by now that I'm completely unprincipled, so: NO
Does the word Power appear on the card?
[GL] Powerful? - NO
Electrical?
[Software] Electric? - NO
A summary
OK, it’s a non-fictional unique scientific human concept, but not a law or theory. It’s related to Physics, both theoretical and applied. The mineral connection is partly, but not predominantly to stone. It has nothing to do with electricity, levers, weights & measures (with some caveats – as a clue, I would say that you can draw a tenuous connection to an awful lot of things if you put your mind to it). There are 6 words on the card, one of which starts with P, the first word being the definite article – I will not insist on your getting the exact words. None of these words is a number nor a superlative.
It is not an action, nor is it culturally specific, nor to do with geography.

So, if it’s not a law or a theory but is a scientific human concept, what is it?

The periodic table of the elements?
Not really physics, but connected, and it fits the pattern of words.
Fallait y penser
[jim] Indeed yes. The periodic table of the elements it is
No-one asked the Chemistry question, but I couldn't really say it was not related to Physics.

Here, have this glowing transuranic baton before it disappears.

Takes glowing thingy with some caution
My hair is falling out fast enough as it is, thankyou. No, the physics thing was definitely the right call. It's amazing how misleading one can end up being--completely unintentionally--by simply answering the questions as asked.

Anyway, let's have a nice ANIMAL/ABSTRACT.

Is the animal element human?
[Jim] Many of us will sympathise with that. I've gotten myself terribly tied in knots before now, just trying to say "yes" or "no" truthfully.
Is the answer a fictional character?
[jim, Kim] I know exactly how that feels, I remember trying to decide if Jupiter was flammable.
Unique?
[Kim] Human: YES
[GL] Fictional character: YES
[INJ] Unique: YES

Well, it doesn't look like this is going to take long.

Related to Harry Potter?
Male?
[GL] "Is Jupiter Flammable?" There must be scholarly philosophical articles written on that very question.
[Raak] Potter: NO (phew!)
[GL] Male: YES
In a work originally published post 1899 CE?
Originally in written fiction?
Narrowing frighteningly fast
[INJ] Post 1899: YES
[Raak] Written: YES
Biggles?
Was the fiction written by a British author?
[Raak] Several, they generally conclude that there isn't enough oxygen (or mass if you want to use fusion to light it) but if you could provide that, then it would be.
An eponymous character?
[GL] British: NO
[INJ] Eponymous: NO (that is, there are many things named after this character, but the book in which he originally appears isn't.)
Raffles?
[Software] Raffles: NO
In a work originally published prior to 1999 CE?
[GL] Pre 1999: YES
Was the author American?
In a work originally published in English?
[Raak] American: YES
[CdM] In English: YES
Originally in a cartoon/graphic work?
[INJ] Cartoon: NO
Science fiction?
Would the creator of this character be blessed with a name that relates to the provision of particular goods and services?
Did this character appear in more than one book?
Is this character under the age of 20?
[Raak] Science fiction: NO
[Dujon] Service industry: NO
[CdM] Multiple books: As far as I know, NO. He's mentioned in other works, but the only book I know of that he actually appears in is a stand-alone.
[Spangle] Under 20: NO
Is the work based in a war zone?
Sorry, missed one
[Raak] Biggles: NO (you might have been able to infer this from other answers)
[INJ] War games: NO, it isn't Catch-22 :)
Oh dear, that's a major, major disappointment!
Sports connection?
[Software] Sporty: NO
"Other works" = film?
Written between 1950 & 1970?
[Phil] Film: That's not what I had in mind when I said it, but the original written work has been transferred to the silver screen.
[INJ] 1950-1970: YES
In children's literature?
[CdM] Kid stuff: NO
Holden Caulfield?
Getting the guess out of the way.
[INJ] Lousy...: NO (isn't he a "goddam minor"?)
Written in the sixties?
Did the book win a prize?
Yes, I missed Spangle's question. Also, of course, there has never been a film.
[Projoy] 60s: Mostly NO.
[INJ] Prize: YES
Was it the author's only published novel?
Does the book cover a span of several years (say, more than a decade)?
[INJ] The one and only: YES
[CdM] Decade plus: NO
Did the character share his name with a popular beat combo?
Give or take a letter.
[INJ] Popular beat combo: YES
If you don't put us out of our misery soon, you're going to get gazumped, and I for one will laugh :)
There are still at least 2 possible answers - even if my suspicions are correct.
Clarification
Actually I'm taking "give or take a letter" to mean "give or take a letter plus the definite article" in my answer to the previous.
Boo Radley?
Well, I know it's bad form to have 2 goes in a row, but it is over 24 hours since the last one. Assuming I'm heading in the right direction I should like to point out the existence of 'The Tom Robinson Band' and bands called 'Atticus Finch' and 'Scout', not to mention a singer called 'Jem'.
We have a winner
[INJ] YES! It is Arthur "Boo" Radley from To Kill a Mockingbird. A pale figure emerges blinking into the light and slips a baton into your hand before vanishing.
Your point is taken, although you could probably find a band called just about anything if you looked. I suppose I'm the right age and nationality to immediately think of The Boo Radleys if TKAM and bands come up together.
[jim] Sorry if that sounded like a complaint - I was thinking of The Boo Radleys as well when I asked the question (plus Tom Robinson in my comment afterwards). The rest were as a result of googling.
Anyway, since it's me again we'll try not to be too tricky. This next one is VEGETABLE with ABSTRACT connections
Is the vegetable wood?
Is this a well-known phrase or saying?
Edible?
[GL] Woody? - Mostly YES *some applause and a few chuckles in the audience*
[Spangle] Phrase or saying? - NO (not that you won't have seen or heard the words on the card many times)
[CdM] Edible? - NO (or at least, almost entirely No)
Newton's apple tree?
Unique?
A religious reference?
Related to the Occult?
Related to Christmas?
[irach] Newtonian? - NO
[CdM] Only one? - YES
[Dujon] Religious? - NO
[GL] Wooooo? - NO
[Raak] Yule-y? - NO
Toaster < Words on Card < Telephone Box?
I'm a bit embarrassed given we have ladies present, but does this unique item have some sort of phallic symbolism (real or imagined)?
[CdM] Toaster < telephone box < Words on Card
[Dujon] Ooo-er Missus? - NO *a few chuckles*
Sherwood Forest?
Wow!
Hit the bullseye! Sherwood Forest it is.
One baton disguised as a quarter-staff handed on.
For a while there I couldn't see the forest for the trees ... The next one is simply ANIMAL
The Conservative Party?
Human?
[FGZstar] Good answer, but no.
[Gusset Login] Yes, human.
Mammalian?
[FGZstar] Human, so, yes mammalian.
Alive?
More than one human?
Famous?
[ImNotJohn] Dead as a doornail.
[Spangle] One human.
[Softers] Yes, famous.
Was alive in the 20th century?
A scientist?
Male?
[Raak] Not alive in the 20th century
[jim] Not a scientist
[Spangle] Yes, male.
Connected with the arts?
[ImNotJohn] The arts were one of the things he was known for.
European?
[Software] Yes, European.
A writer?
[ImNotJohn] Yes, a writer.
British?
[jim] Yes, a British writer.
Warm Blooded?
Born before 1800?
[all] Warm-blooded when he was alive, yes.
[Gusset Login] Born after 1800.
Popular novelist?
Known in other fields as well?
Apart from writing
[Software] Not a novelist.
[ImNotJohn] Known for at least one other field apart from writing.
Benjamine Disraeli?
[FGStar] Not Disraeli (but quite coincidentally all the letters in the last name of the person on the card are contained in "Disraeli"- HUGE HINT!)
Edward Lear?
[Raak] Right on. Edward Lear it is.
A runcible spoon in lieu of the traditional baton is handed over to Raak.
Begins with a...
...oh hang on, I'll come back later.
Looking for a 'P', Tuj? I've left a few for you; down the hall and turn left.
There was an old man of Morn. Crescent
Who received a mysterious present
"'Tis MINERAL!" he said
And nodded his head
That puzzling old man of Morn. Crescent.
Metal?
Begins with a P?
[INJ] Not metal.
[GL] Does not begin with a P.
Man-made?
Unique?
Liquid?
[Software] Hmm..."yes" is probably the less misleading answer.
[jim] There is only one.
[INJ] Not liquid.
Made of Stone?
[GL] *murmurings in the audience* No. Not made of stone.
Made of glass?
[Phil] Glass? Better not be. *laughter*
Used in a sporting context?
Plaster of Paris?
Geographic feature?
[INJ] Not sporting.
[FGZ*] Not PoP.
[CdM] Not geographic.
Is the answer on the card the name of a famous jewel?
[Dujon] *applause!* Spot on.
The Graff Pink?
Guessing at topicality
[Phil] Is that a reference to some royal betrothal? I haven't been following the news. Anyway, not the Pink 'Un.
The Koh-i-Noor?
[jim] Not the Koh-i-Noor.
A diamond?
[GL] Not a diamond.
:"The Star of India" sapphire?
[irach] Bollywood? No.
Is it a corundum?
[jim] It is a corundum.
Red or reddish?
[irach] Not red.
Was this a gem from Sri Lanka?
[Dujon] It is not known to be from Sri Lanka.
The sapphire in Kate Middleton'e engagement ring?
[FGZ*} Ah, is that her name? Having checked the latest news, I believe the corundum I have in mind is still in its traditional setting.
St. Edward's Sapphire?
[GL] The very one. Have this sapphire-headed sceptre.
[Raak] No, not royal. It broke the record for most expensive jewel this week.
That was unexpected. Let's go with a simple ANIMAL.
A simple human?
[Software] Human? Yes
[Software] Simple? I refuse to comment
Kate Middleton?
I think I'm getting the hang of this "news" thing.
[Raak] The Queen of the Future? No
Alive?
[Software] Alive? Not anymore
British?
Alive in the 20th century?
[Software] Brit? Yes
[Raak] C20? Yes
Writer?
[Software] Writer? No
Connected with the arts?
A political figure?
[INJ] Artsy? Yes
[Raaak] Politics? No
Entertainer?
[Software] Entertaining? Yes
An actor?
Michael Jackson?
Comic?
Female?
[INJ] Actor? Yes
[FGZ*] MJ? No
[Software] Comic? If you mean stand up comedian, then no.
[CdM] Girly? No
Has he won an Oscar?
[Raaak] Oscar? {Sounds of mirth from the Audience} No.
Better known from films rather than TV?
[INJ] Films > TV? No.
Norman Wisdom?
[Software] Sir Norman? No
Is he known for sitcom roles?
Did he die before the age of sixty?
Would half of an hour be an appropriate comment?
[Raaaak] Sitcom roles? He is known for a sitcom role but perhaps better known for other roles.
[CdM] Dead before Sixty? No
Hancock's Half Hour? No
Primarily known for roles on children's TV?
Sid James?
[INJ] Primarily known for Kids TV? It depends on your age and/or opinion of the programme. But possibly Yes.
[Software] Sid James? No
English?
Whovian?
[jim] English? Yes
[INJ] Related to Doctor Who? {Much applause from the audience that takes time to die down} Yes
Sylvester McCoy?
[Rak] Sylvester McCoy? Isn't English or Dead. So obviously, No.
Wurzel Gummidge?
Or rather Jon Pertwee.
[Software] Jon Pertwee? Yes! Have a sonic baton.
Who? me?
Well, well. Now I must think!

After due consideration: ANIMAL and VEGETABLE.

Is it unique?
Is the vegetable wood?
Is the animal alive?
A leather-covered writing desk?
Tuj - Unique? - NO
INJ - Wooden? - NO
GL - Alive? - NO
Raak - Bureau? - NO
Is it edible?
INJ - Edible - YES
Meat enclosed in bread?
Haggis, Neeps and Tatties?
A guess, since it's St Andrews day.
Raak - Ham sandwich? - NO
FGZ - Wee beastie? - NO
Does pie enter into the equation?
Culturally specific?
Meat enclosed in pastry?
GL - Pie? - YES
INJ - Non-universal? - YES, probably
Raak - Snake and Sidney - NO
Fish pie?
Shepherd's pie?
Spangle - Cod piece? - NO
FGZ - Spudlike? - NO
Is the answer the name of a dish?
Is pasta involved?
Is the animal part - meat?
Is it a custard pie?
INJ - Menu item? - YES
Raak - Italian? - NO
Spangle - Cow pie? - NO
GL - Laurel & Hardy? - NO
Is the animal part a dairy product?
Does the animal part include eggs?
INJ - Bovine? - Can be, YES
Raak - Fowl? - AFIK NO
*small voice*
I'm having a bit of difficulty understanding your replies as you seem to alter the question asked prior to responding, egs: 'cow pie' [I didn't ask that] 'bovine' and 'fowl', 'italian' etc. Sorry if this is the way this game should be played. Clearly, I'm not very good at it!
Chessecake?
That is, cheesecake?
Mind you, a chessecake would be interesting, with the chessemen made of plain and chocolate marzipan.
Raak - Cheesy? - NO
Spangle
Are you American?
Related to Christmas in any way?
FGZ - Seasonal? - YES
Mince Pie?
Phil - Yule fuel? - YES!

Phil has it! I therefore hand over the cracker-shaped baton.

Ooops!!!
Multiple and profuse apologies for my recent absence from this game. I offer no excuses, only reasons, which are too diverse and manifold to detail at this time.

The challenge I set is ANIMAL

human?
Alive?
Unique?
One of the man-eating sharks of Sharm el-Sheikh?
[INJ] Human? NO
[GL] Alive? YES and NO is the most correct answer I can give
[CdM] Unique? NO (which explains the previous answer)
[jim] Sharm-el-Shark? NO
Avian?
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