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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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Is it solid?
...by which I mean rigid, pickuppable, even if it has voids within
[Raak] Solid? YES, in the sense you give.
Cabbage?
The most disgusting taste known to mankind.
[Rosie] Eat yer greens? NO
Normally eaten on its own?
[Ig] A solo dish? YES
Strong flavour?
[Lib] Strong flavour? This is subjective, but I would be inclined to say NO, on balance.
Is it primarily grain?
[Raak] With the grain? NO
Is it usually processed before being eaten (other than simply cooking)?
Does it feature in Peanuts round about this time of year?
Does it come in a bunch?
[Phil] Processed? YES! *applause*
[ISP] I don't read Peanuts, so I'm NOT SURE, but it wouldn't surprise me if that were so.
[Lib] Bunch? NO
From the genus Cucurbita?
[Ig] Cucurbita? NO
Dates?
[Rosie] Genus Calenda? NO
Easter eggs?
[Raak] Hoorah! YES!, the answer is "Easter Egg" (meaning the chocolate variety. I didn't include ANIMAL (milk) as I believe you can get dark chocolate eggs. *hands over bulbous, brown, slighly sticky baton to Raak*
The next one is M I N E R A L.
Stonehenge?
Diamond?
Solid?
Metal?
[Tuj] Not Stonehenge
[Lib] Not diamond.
[Projoy] Pickuppable, yes.
[Rosie] Primarily metal.
Peanuts
[Projoy] I was referring to the Great Pumpkin, and on reflection I'm not sure it's this time of year - I've a niggling voice in my head that suggests halloween.
[ISP] Not art.
Smaller than a toaster?
[Projoy] Smaller than a toaster.
Bigger than a matchbox?
A manufactured object?
Projoy - Bigger than a matchbox.
ImNotJohn - A manufactured object.
Matchboxes
Actually, it could be smaller than a matchbox, but not usually.
A child's toy?
A tool of some kind?
[ISP] Not a toy.
[Rosie] One would not ordinarily call it a tool.
A container?
A device?
[ISP] Not a container.
[ISP] YES! A device.
electronic?
[Projoy] Can be electronic.
Does it measure something?
Communication device?
[ISP] Yes, it measures something.
[Lib] Not a communication device.
A tape measure?
Weighing?
[Projoy] Not a tape measure.
[Lib] Does not weigh anything. Er, if you see what I mean.
Measures something invisible?
[Projoy] *applause* Yes, it measures something invisible.
Are most instances of it electronic these days?
A carbon monoxide detector?
[Projoy] Yes, usually electronic.
[Rosie] Not a carbon monoxide detector.
Measuring distances?
Measures some sort of radiation?
[I1] Not distances.
[I2] Not radiation.
Multimeter? Electricity meter?
A barometer?
[gil] Does not measure volts, amps, ohms, continuity, capacitance, impedance, hFE, diode leakage, or anything else electrical.
[Projoy] Not a barometer.
Used indoors?
Anemometer?
[ISP] Used indoors.
[Projoy] Not an anemonomometer.
Am I likely to own one?
Does it measure time?
A stopwatch?
[I] Quite likely to own one.
[P] *cheering* Yes, it measures time.
[P] Not a stopwatch.
An alarm clock?
[INJ] BRRRRRNNNNGGGG! It is indeed an alarm clock.
*applauds* That was a good one.
Ooooh
OK - I'm going out this evening, so you've got about half an hour and then a gap of 14 hours. This one is basically Mineral with Animal connections
Is it art?
Is it science?
[IS,P] Yes, but is it art? - NO
[Chalky] Science - NO (except in extremely broad uses of the term)
Is it found in the home?
[IS,P] domestic? - NO
Constructed?
[IS,P] constructed - YES
A single, specific object?
[IS,P] - zoo - NO
[PJ] one is one and all alone? - NO (they may not be legion, but there is more than one)
A building of some sort?
[IS,P] building - NO
A Henge?
Stonehenge, Brasshenge, Bakelitehenge etc.
[Rosie] hengist? - NO
Bigger than a phone box?
[Projoy] > phone box - YES
Bigger than a terraced house?
Something made largely of chalk?
[Projoy] 2 up 2 down - NO
[IS,P] Chalky - NO
Is it functional?
Is it specific to a particular country or culture?
Bigger than a shed?
Old, i.e. >500 yrs?
[IS,P] functional? - YES
[Irg] cultural specificity - Hmmm. YESish (but that's probably not going to help much)
[Projoy] > shed - YES
[Rosie] Old? - NO
Is it in a specific location?
Is there only one of it?
Generally lives outside?
Mostly metallic?
Too nice a day to be inside
[IS,P] In specific location - NO
[IS,P] Only one? - NO (see previous answer)
[Projoy] in the open air? - YES (some applause)
[Rosie] Mostly metallic? - YES (the 'basically mineral' description means that there will be some vegetable and animal, but not significant amounts)
Found in densely populated places or in the country?
A Henry Moore sculpture?
[Projoy] dense people - could be either, I've seen one in a densely populated area
[Raak] lots of brass - NO
Anything to do with transport?
[Raak] Transport? - YES (Applause)
A preserved steam engine?
A traction engine?
[Rosie] steam engine - NO
[Projoy] in traction? - NO
Essentially mobile?
For transporting people?
A milk float?
[Rosie] essentially Mobile - YES
[Irg] For transporting people? - YES
[Projoy] Erniemobile - NO
Does it carry just a single person?
Some sort of lorry?
[Raak] just for one - NO
[Projoy] Lorry - NO
Bus?
Client site all day today - don't know how often I'll get on here
[Projoy] bus - NO
A particular make/model of car?
Connected with farming?
Airborne?
Do it got wheels?
A hot air balloon?
Does it run on rails?
Does it run on cables?
Does it carry its own fuel with it?
Sorry - no access today until now
[Irg] particular make/model of car? - NO
[Projoy] agricultural - NO
[Rosie] Airborne - NO (some laughter)
[Projoy] Wheeled? - YES
[Lib] Montgolfière? - NO
[UK] on rails - NO
[Raak] wiry? - NO
[UK] Does it carry its own fuel with it? - YES
Military?
[Raak] military? - originally YES, but now usually NO(more audience applause)
A jeep?
[Phil] Jeep? - NO (I thought that would be the next guess)
A Hummer?
DUKW?
Motorbike and sidecar?
Scratch that. doesn't fit the 'bigger than a shed' criterion
Mobile Canteen?
One of those VW camper vans with the concertina top?
We have a winner
[Uncle Korky] - Well done. A DUKW it is!
The other answers are therefore obvious. I'm disappointed that no-one examined the animal connection, nor did I ever manage to answer both land and water transport.

One slightly damp baton handed on.

*is a little embarrassed at having lurked to victory again*
Sorry about this delay, but I've got a job interview this morning, which I need to concentrate on. I'll post your new clue when it's all over (probably about lunchtime).
[UK] Good Luck! Keep focused and you'll shine. I had an interview (in Cardiff of all places) yesterday and it was actually quite fun. (I know I am a strange thing.) It was fun because the topic for the presentation I was asked to prepare was 'me', and as I'm sure you all know I have no problems talking about myself! GOOD LUCK!!!! Or, hope it went well, if you've already done it.
DUKW
I have a feeling that Connie Booth would have been found not guilty in Holy Grail - they'd never prove she weighed the same as a DUKW.
[Lib] Cheers, m'dear! It went pretty well, and should hear by the end of the week. [IS,P] Perhaps my guess was inspired by knowing England were going to face South Africa later that day...
Anyway - a new clue... let's say... animal.
Alive?
The England cricket team?
Livin' Thing? YES
All out? NO
After a bit of thinking, I'll tinker with the classification to say that it's animal with an abstract element.
One of it?
A job title?
Singular? YES *applause*
Jobsworth? NO
Fictional?
You're making it up? You could argue this either way, he says enigmatically...
Human?
Homo sapiens? YES *applause*
is it art?
Art? Not even in the broadest or most generous uses of the term!
Is it an avatar?
Is this person a charlatan?
Mrs Trellis?
Ever been alive?
Avatar? I had to check the definition on this one: the only explanation I found was an earthly incarnation of a divine personage, so the answer to this is NO. However, I suspect this may not be what you meant...
Charlatan? NO.
Trellis? NO *some applause*
Ever been alive? You could argue this either way, he says enigmatically...
The lovely Samantha?
The invisible woman? NO *similar level of applause as before*, as I can see how you're thinking...
Male?
Blokeish? YES *applause*
Humph?
Lyttleton? NO *diminishing applause* I think you're getting misled by earlier applause...
Archie Andrews?
An educated guess? NO
Is heard on the radio?
An actor playing a role?
Aged under 40?
Sven?
Borat?
Mycroft?
Avatar
I was thinking 'graphical representation in a game of a real person'
Wireless? NO
Actor? NO
Under 40? YES
The rippling one? NO
Borat? NO
Mr Holmes snr? NO
Avatar II? NO - but the audience senses that IS,P is poking around the right area, and responds with appropriate *applause*.
Is this person advertising something?
Back after these important messages? NO
Is it 'Uncle Korky' - is what I was trying, and failing, to get at.
We have a winner! The very words on the card are "Uncle Korky", so one morniversal baton is well and truly passed on!
[uk] However did you think of that one?
The next one is Mineral. In the immortal words of Ron Pickering "away you go"
Unique?
[Tuj] One is one and all alone and evermore shall be so? NO
Metallic?
Useful?
[Tuj] Metallic YES
[Projoy] Useful? NOT AS SUCH
Bigger than a toaster?
Is it art?
[Tuj] Toastier than thou? YES [Korky] Art for Art's Sake? NOT AS SUCH
This is quite hard, isn't it? Ages since I did the setting for one of these.
Is it beautiful?
[Projoy] Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So... I wouldn't call it beautiful, whadda you think?
A work of architecture?
Is it bigger than the average garden shed?
[Raak] Millenium Tent? NO
[Uncle 'Two Sheds' Korky] NO.
Human-made?
[Projoy]A made thing? YES
Is it still manufactured nowadays?
[UK] Two questions in one? I'll choose to answer Is it manufactured. NO
Hmmm... Human-made - yet NOT manufactured... Is it a by-product?
All that is not unique is not manufactured.
[UK] Manufactured: to produce goods in large numbers, usually in a factory using machines.
Is it a by-product? Of what? The answer's NO anyway, I'm just curious.
I think my point is you can make more than one of a thing without manufacturing being involved at all.
... is going to sit in Place Luxembourg basking in the sunshine with a couple of cool beers ('cos it's Happy Hour - 2 for 1). Pissed if back later.
Are instances of this still being made?
(to re-pose the remainder of UK's question)
Is this specific to a particular culture or country?
[INJ] in production? The thing itself NO, images of the thing YES, in fact probably even manufactured (sorry, Korks).
[Irg]YES audience applause
Begins with P?
Bigger than a phone box?
[Tuj] P Please Bob? NO
[Pj] Between Phonebox and Shed? NO
Is it an implement?
[Kim] Implement? NO
Still confused... Is is hand-made?
Are the various instances of this essentially the same?
i.e. there is only one design and differences are due to variations in the making process.
Bigger than a tea-chest?
[UK] Handmade YES
[INJ] YES, recognisably similar.
[Pj] NO even smaller still than a tea chest. For free, it's larger than a tea caddy.
[ISP] We know it is. :) You already told us it's larger than a toaster :)
An example of a craft?
*quietly points out that, etymologically at least, the word "manufactured" means "hand-made"**
[Pj] Crafted? YES.
[Man-u-facture] Pardon me for using dictionaries to look up definitions. It won't happen again.
Is it light enough to be carried?
[UK] Portable? YES but unhelpful I expect. Not my first unhelpful answer, either.
A household item?
...however you wish to interpret that.
[Tuj] One in every home? NO
Does it belong outside?
Is the particular country/culture European?
Metal all the way through?
[Tuj] Out of doors? YES audience applause
[Irouléguy] Europe to something? YES indeed
[Projoy] Showing its mettle? YES more audience applause
Well done all three.
Street furniture?
Used in sport?
Red in colour?
[Pj] NOT street furniture.
[Irg] NOT used in sport
[Lib] Red? NOT AS SUCH.
A sculpture?
[CdM] Sculpted? YES audience goes wild. I still maintain that it is not ars gratia artis as such.
Does it have a purpose beyond aesthetics?
(particularly since you claim it is not beautiful)
[CdM] Purpose? YES it does indeed. (particularly since I think it's just a gimmicky piece of tat)
Is it painted?
[UK] Painted? NO
British?
Does it have moving parts?
[INJ] British? NO, foreign, I'm afraid.
[UK] NO. raucous audience laughter
Has discovered it's fun to say 'raucous'...
Does it convey information in some form?
*Blushing in the ridicule of the audience*
[UK] Info? NO.
PS it's not ridicule. You said 'parts'
Is it particularly British?
[IS,P] Ah! I just though I was being spectacularly wrong!
Keep up, UK!
... INJ asked that forty minutes ago. NO still.
Is it... British? NO - I'M KIDDING! Is it Italian?
OK - NOW I'm blushing!
Country specifics
[UK] Italian? NEANCHE.
The Manneken-Pis?
(although I'm not sure what its purpose would be)
We have a winner! The very words on the card are "Manneken Pis", and its purpose is "fountain" unless that counts as street furniture in which case its purpose is "tourist attraction", particularly with all the crappy shabby costumes they put on the nasty little sod. One manneken pis baton shaped like a corkscrew passed on! Thank god for that, the answering questions is much harder than the asking. I shall be sure to avoid getting anything right for the foreseeable future.
moving parts
[UK] It has water moving through its parts...
[IS,P] NOW I understand the merriment...!
Can't help thinking that your 'parts' hilarity contributed to CdM's victory. After all, it was the first real guess.
[IS,P] Yes, that audience reaction contributed, together with your location and your "gimmicky piece of tat" comment. OK, this one is

VEGETABLE and ABSTRACT
A turnip in the shape of a thingy
With acknowledgements to Richard Curtis
A work of art?
A wooden sculpture?
Fictional?
Carrot flavour?
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