Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
[CdM] YES!! Actually NO, but I'm getting fed up. [Simon's Mith] Other than those witnesses to global warming, the Arctic Monkeys. Please stick to the subject. The audience has formed an action group and are shouting "What do we want? The Answer! When do we want it? NOW!"
I was going to say that CdM was close enough for me, but Blackpool rock it is, so Rosie cannot be denied. Rosie will now take this sweet baton (not that end, I've been sucking it there) and note that it has the word WINNER written all the way through! Audience clap Rosie politely
(Chalky) Hello, m'dear, nice to see you again. Unfortunately your suggestion is wrong. Isn't scorchio an adjective? If I may indulge myself I would suggest that it is a Welsh verb, the -io- ending being the giveaway. Could mean "to burn the toast" &c. (Simons Mith) NO, not an isobar, nothing quite so technical.
Counters set to zero, AOTC generator enclenched, combobulator aligned, sphinx tube at operating temperature, and posting a live Facebook stream. Ok, that should do it. This is MINERAL, and may God bless all that sail in her.
Part 4, in which Jane realises that the Comte de Chambord is up to no good, and she says "NO" a lot.
[Rosie] NO. [Raak] The galaxy being big an' all, who knows, there may well be some. But otherwise NO, though some "reports" etc. etc. [Bism] That gets a round of applause only for the inventiveness. NO.
[Rosie] YES. Now we're getting somewhere. [Raak] Also YES. [Simon] YES. Kryptonite it is. Studio tapes of hard static played, imitating applause. Please take this green, glowing baton, it's been having a bad effect on me.
[Bismarck] YES. Well I thought they were. Don't they sting you, then leave you to rot and soak up the juices? Perhaps that technically counts as something else. But AIUI even carnivorous plants only use meat as a dietary supplement. [Raak] No, just clackclackclack as far as I remember. Bismarck has it. I'll just put on a nice thick pair of gloves and then hand over this... baton.
[Simon's Mith] NO, not a dresser. The AOTC might have turned up in the eponymous film, I shouldn't wonder. [Raak] I feel it would make a rather unwieldy tool, so NO.
[Raak] NO, that is not its primary function. [Simons Mith] NO, this is a generic item. [Boolbar] There MAY BE examples that have finials and thingummies, but it isn't necessary for the definition of the whatever-it-is.
[Superman] NOT a dumb waiter. [Raak] NOT a church pew. [Simon's Mith, who henceforth will be spelt with an apostrophe as I can't be bothered correcting it any more] NOT a lectern. A hint - found in a house.
[Raak] NO, not a cabinet. IKEA still have a thing under the name of some fruit that could be described as the AOTC, but the version I found when the subject came up first has now disappeared from the catalogue.
Is it a display case sold with a subscription to receive a uniquely designed collectible thimble every month until you build up a treasured heirloom to pass on to your descendants, who will after a decent but short interval (say, on return from the funeral) chuck it in the bin?
People who collect thimbles (it says on a thimble-collecting site) are known as Digitabulists. How very depressing.
[Raak] I would have sworn that the whatsit was peculiarly British, but my in-laws also have one and they're Belgian. It was quite a culture shock. [Software] NO.
[Boolbar] NO, not some kind of table. [Raak] NO, not a tallboy, though I have no doubt that a room with a tall boy, a vitrine, an elephant's foot basket and maybe a Welsh dresser would also have one of the AOTC.
[Software] NO, drawers are very rare. [Raak] SORT OF, but these whatchamacallits are always open framed, so you'd have to take the sides and door off, probably ditch the MDF for real wood, make the shelves smaller as they rose (optional, but traditional), and make the frame somewhat decorative carved. I asked the Internet again and while you can still buy these things (including a modern plastic and aluminium version which gave me a frisson of horror), their heyday was before WW1.
Ah, grandchildren, gather round and I'll tell you the story of The Never-Ending Game.
Or you can ask Uncle Software, he did win it. Congratulations - a whatnot it is! Take this baton-shaped objet d'art once owned by a lady from North Wales and give us your estimation of the insurance value.
(Bismarck) Property? Only in the sense that many people have one of these, but realistically NO. (Boolbar) There is a connection with maths but it is so broad and vague as to be worthless. So, NO. (Raak) I doubt even Tracey Emin could make art out of this, so NO. (Software) NO, not a state of mind.
(Softers) A nickname? Strictly speaking NO but the AOTC does have some of the properties of a nickname. *alert members of the audience perk up* (Radox the Green) NO, not from the Greek.