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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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Does it originate in the British Isles?
Human?
[penelope] Originate in British Isles ? YES
[GL] Human? YES
Was the novel written after 1900?
Does the novel title begin with P?
[Rosie] After 1900? YES
[CdM] P word in title? YES
*audience senses a finish and cheers accordingly*
Is anyone willing to guess the obvious, thereby putting themself in the chair for the next puzzler?
Sure. What is it?
Is the character male?
Ronny Heaslop
That's got to be right. Because, seriously, how many non-figurative characters in post-1900 British novels with a word in the title that begins with P can there be?
... giving it all away
[GL] It's a girl
[Tuj] Male? NO
[CdM] Ronnie Heaslop? NO. And the play/novel has two P words.
... and it's linked to Phil's previous solution.
[Chalky] Oh, that's just darling.
Remind me never to play this game again ...
Aw, Chalks, don't be upset.
Frankly this one has stumped me.
Peter Pan?
(Chalky) Memo: Never play this game again.
[Chalky] I hope that comment made sense! If my guess is wrong, it probably just seemed weird (or worse, obnoxious).
with a woo and a hoo
A WINNER AT LAST! Wendy from Peter Pan it is!
Well played Rosie and CdM :)
Here - argue over this wand-shaped baton I nicked from Tinkerbell.
(Chalky) You beast.

And the next object is ABSTRACT

An Emotion?
Is there but a single word on the card?
[Chalky] I think when you said it was obvious, we all backed off presuming it must be obvious to somebody, somebody else...
(GL) Not an emotion.
(Tuj) A single word plus the indefinite article.
A silent P, obviously
Does the indefinite article begin with P?
(CdM) Of course - 's a particle innit.
Is it a human invention?
An expression?
Well done you old bu**er
(Tuj) NO, not a human invention.
(Softers) Essentially NO, but can be used figuratively, just about.
A ghost?
(Software) Not a ghost.
Is it visible?
There's not much to go on so far...
Is it fictional?
(Knobbly) Not visible, though its effects may well be.
(Raak) Not fictional.

I should add, perhaps, that the AOTC has a kind of material connection and that this would normally be thought of as Mineral.

A type of air movement?
(Dujon) Air movement? NO, but it could be said there's a connection, stretching a point.
An unfortunate brush?
(Software) NO, not an unfortunate brush.
Any political connection?
(Software) NO political connection whatever.
Has it always existed as an idea?
Is it bigger than a toaster?
(Tuj) I would say YES.
(Chalky) Could be. Could be any size. Its dimensions in its physical manifestation are irrelevant.
An emotion?
(Software) NO, not an emotion
OK, is it audible?
At last a customer
(Knobbly) Audible? NO, most definitely not.
Iron will?
(Softers) Ferrous (or ferric) determination? NO. It's not a human quality.
An ill wind?
Oh, dear. I am struggling with this.
(Softers) NO, by definition impossible.
Rock solid?
Any chance of a clue?
(Software) Rock solid? NO, for the same reason as before. This is not difficult; in fact there's nothing to it, really.
A vacuum?
(Raak) YES! A total absence of material entities. Now give us something easy FFS.
Vegetable and Mineral, with Abstract connections
Vegetable wood?
Yes, the vegetable is wood.
Is this some kind of machine or device?
Abstract religious?
[Rosie] Not really a machine or device.
[Dujon] Not religious.
Unique?
Is the AOTC the title of some work?
Not the title of a work.
Is the mineral metal?
Yes, the mineral is metal.
Unique?
Not unique.
Does it begin with P?
Does not begin with a P.
Found in the house?
Not typically. That is, the typical house would not contain any of these, and the typical one of these would not be in a house.
Would I be in danger of cutting myself on it?
You cannot cut yourself on one.
Mass produced?
Um...there are rather a lot of these, but I can't find any information about whether they are made on an automated production line.
Used in a sport or game?
Not used in a sport or game.
Do they tend to be found in particular areas of the world?
A fixture?
Not in particular areas of the world.
Not a fixture.
A garden shed?
Not a garden shed. I'd expect those to be fixtures, although I suppose you could put wheels on one and tow it on holiday with you.
Can these things be lifted by one man?
Yes, one man can lift one of these.
That is, any reasonably fit man, not one particular Schwarzenegger.
A barrel?
*cheering* Yes, a barrel. But can you be more specific? Bear in mind the abstract connection.
A Barrel of laughs?
Not a barrel of laughs.
A beer barrel
Specifically, real ale :)
Not necessarily a beer barrel.
A firkin?
Not a firkin.
A biscuit barrel?
Not a biscuit barrel.
Hint: It's not about what's in it ? quite the opposite!
The "?" was supposed to be a "?".
Er, not quite. It was supposed to be a "—". Let's see if that gets through.
Scraping the bottom of the barrel?
Scraping etc.? No, but that's more in the right direction.
The first word is the indefinite article.
A barrel organ?
Perhaps penelope could rustle a Dutch one up.
Not a barrel organ.
Do we have a stuck fermentation of ideas? A sort of barrel, that features in a figurative expression or saying.
A sort of barrel that has fish in it that can be easily shot
OK, that's probably not right.
There's a surprisingly lage number of figurative expressions involving barrels. Fish, for the shooting of, is not the one.
"lage": a synonym for "several", used of a severality that due to attentional bias one experiences as surprisingly larger than 1.
A barrel of laughs?
Not a barrel of laughs. Hint: nor a barrel of anything else!
An empty barrel?
YES! *the crowd's applause is drowned out by a tap on the side of one*
Oh, dear. Being a smartar*e I am now lumbered with the spile-shaped batton.
Let me think. Ah, yes! abstract with strong animal, vegetable and mineral connections.
The sound made by a tree falling in the forest when no-one is present to hear it?
[Raak] NO - abstract but not metaphysical
A fictional animal?
An organisation?
A stock phrase or saying?
[GL] Fictional? - NO
[Rosie] Organization? - YES
[Raak] Phrase or Saying? - NO
Created after 1900?
A governmental organisation?
Based in Europe?
Sorry for delay, have been away.
[Rosie] After 1900? - YES
[Raak] Big Brother? - NO
[GL] European? - YES
A scientific organisation?
[Raak] Scientific? - NO * audience chuckles *
A cult?
An NGO?
[Raak] cult? - NO * some guffawing in the audience * (well, some might say it is)
[Bismarck] NGO? - Mmmm. Tricky, probably NO
The National Trust?
Is it classed as a charity /not-for-profit?
A religion?
[Rosie] NT? - NO
[Bismarck] Charitable? - NO * more audience chuckling *
[Phil] Godbothering? - NO * further tittering *
Do they sponsor a football team?
Does it have its own URL?
The Mafia?
[Bismarck] Sponsorship? - NO
[Raak] URL? Why, YES
[Rosie] Those nice Sicilian gentlemen? - NO
An organised religion, then?
I'm taking a clue from the audience here...
Recapitulons, mes amis...
Post-1900 European company, with pretensions among supporters to be quasi-religious and quasi-scientific, yet not an NGO and not important enough to sponsor the footie. Neither the Mafia, nor their cousins the NT. Links to animal, vegetable and mineral. Hmmmm.
Are they able to ban people from the exercise of their professions?
[Knobbly] Godbothering with form? - NO * Phil ruled that out *
[Bismarck] - Big Stick? - NO
Does it begin with P?
...just to show gratitude for Bismarck's efforts by making a considered contribution ;)
The East India Company?
Do ships enter into this at all?
Eton?
[Tuj] P-ish? - NO (not one to be seen in the AOTC)
[Raak] Bubble? - NO (the right number of words, though)
[Bismarck] - Harbourish? - NO
[Rosie] The origin of our present governing classes? - NO
Is this a real-life organisation, or one that exists only on a screen?
[Bismarck] Real or imagery? - er, YES. * sporadic clapping from audience *
Logical NOR should have been used in previous question. Ahem. Is this an imaginary company?
[Bismarck] Virtual? - NO

Hint: The AOTC has 4 words one being the definite article it exists on screen.

The League of Gentlemen?
Never watched it; only vaguely even heard of it; but it popped into my head after reading over the game so I thought I'd go for an audacious lurker's victory.
[CdM] LOG? - NO
The Great Western Railway?
Is the third word "of"?
[Rosie] God's Wonderful Railway? - sadly, NO
[Raak] of-ly? NO

* audience shuffling *

Is this organisation viewed favourably by the British population?
[Rosie] Favourable to the Brits - mmmm, NO (not lately, anyway)
The European Court of Justice?
[Rosie] ECoJ? - NO * sporadic clapping from audience *
The Arsenal?
[Bimarck] The Gunners? - NO. * audience getting restless *
A political party?
Ah... do I hear a few bars of the prelude to Charpentier's Te Deum?
The European Court of Human Rights?
Well, it IS down the road from me...
[Bismarck] Party? - NO
[nights] ECHR? - NO * a few random claps from the audience *
Was my guess a bit too subtle? Is it the European Broadcasting Union?
[Knobbly] EBU? - NO * audience wakes up with enthusiastic clapping *
Is this a European attempt to celebrate the diversity of culture?
[Bismarck] multicultural? - YES! * audience getting excited *
Musical culture?
[Bismarck] music? - YES! * audience wild with anticipation *
The Eurovision Song Contest?
[Rosie] Tat for the masses? - YES!!!! at last.

Hands over the tacky microphone-shaped baton to Rosie

I could object that the Eurovision Song Contest is not an organisation (whereas the EBU is which is why I went for that), but I wouldn't want to be accused of taking this too seriously.
I also don't want the baton at the moment.
As you were...
Blast! beaten to it. Rosie, congratulations. May your all dihydrogen oxide be changed to dihydrogen dioxide for twenty milliseconds.
Peroxide blonde
(Bismarck) Now you see it, now you don't.
And the next object is ABSTRACT with ANIMAL connections.
Human animal?
(Softers) Human? Humans are involved but essentially NO.
Is it green?
Does it begin with P?
Does it make a noise?
Can I live without it?
Sorry for the delay
(Bismarck) NO, not green.
(Tuj) P? Not in any language I can think of.
(Knobbly) A noise? YES, it must have done.
(Boolbar) Essential for life? NO.
The Llangollen Amateur Vivisectionists' Society! It just came to me in a flash.
(Bismarck) Dee-scission? I'm afraid not.
Fictional?
Fictional?
Oops.
Fictional?
The Big Bang?
Going for an early attempt...
Is it a human invention?
(Raak + Gusset Login) NO, not fictional.
(Knobbly) NO, not the Big Bang.
(Tuj) YES, human, but I wouldn't call it an invention.
A philosophical concept?
(Raak) NO, not philosophical, not a concept.
Does it still exist?
(Bismarck) Still exist? NO.
Associated with a particular geographical locale?
Also, could you clarify an earlier answer? When Boolbar asked "Can I live without it?", was your answer of "NO" directed to that question or your contrarily-rephrased "Essential for life?"?
(Tuj) Point taken. The rephrasing had got a bit out of hand. The answer to "Can I live without it?" is YES. As for your actual question, the answer is YES, followed by *audience animation*.
Todo with the planet taken as a whole?
Animal bit-were they raised for food?
(Raak) NO, not to do with the whole planet.
(Bismarck) For food? YES.
May not be able to have another guess for a while, so I'll try bovine spongiform encephalitis.
Did it exist for a specific period of time?
[Rosie] An animated audience, eh? At least no people were harmed in the making of assistance-giving reactions =)
(Bismarck) Mad cow? Now who am I thinking of? I'm afraid the answer is NO.
(Tuj) YES. *even more audience animation*
Powdered egg?
Some sort of public event?
(Softers) Powdered egg? Good stuff - it wasn't even on the ration IIRC. But NOT the answer.
(Raak) A public event? Certainly not intended as such though most of the public would be aware of it.
Cheese rolling?
Cheese rolling? Er, NO.
Did it happen in the UK?
(Bismarck) In the UK? Essentially NO, though I suspect some elements of it did.
A global event?
(Softers) NO, not global
was the specific geographic locale in Europe?
(Bismarck) In Europe? Well, YES, sort of.
Confusticated... has a 'specific' locale (++audience animation) 'sort of' in the European continent and 'sort of not' in the UK. Ireland?
Deconfustificationment
(Bismarck) Specific locale, YES. European continent? NO, but a strict geographer may disagree. Ireland? NO. If I say much more I may as well tell you the answer.
a political event?
Thanks, Rosie. Let's try for the timing - did this happen within your living memory?
(Raak) Political? YES.
(Bismarck) Within my living memory? YES.
an event relating to the EU?
(Raak) NO, not related to the EU.
Did it happen in the previous century?
Suez crisis?
in 1989?
(Bismarck) 20th century? YES.
(Software) NO, not the Suez crisis.
(Raak) In 1989? NO.
1970's?
(Bismarck) 1970's? Partly, YES.
Were fish involved?
(Bismarck) Fish? YES, they were indeed.
Did Iceland win at least 3-0?
(Bismarck) YES. That, I recall, was the score.
"The Phantom Menace", the cut that left the fish-slapping dance scene in?
Stop taking the piss
(Bismarck) NO, it wasn't that one.
The library, you say?
all right, all right... it's the Cod Wars.
It is, of course, the COD WARS. Well done. Take this giant baton-shaped fish finger and proceed to the next object.
Well, nothing for it now (gulp)...
The next object is MINERAL with a side order of location, as there may be multiple instances.
man-made?
[Raak] YES.
Metal?
[Raak] NO, not so as you'd notice
Does it begin with P?
fffrrttt
Mainly stone?
[Tuj] NO, not in any language I am aware of oblig.
[Raak] YES
On Earth?
[Raak] Terrestrial? YES.
Habitable?
[Tuj] NO.
underground?
In Europe?
[Raak] buried? NO
[Tuj] EU-ish? YES
Arc de Triomphe?
[Software] Etoile? NO.
Is it in an urban area?
[Rosie] Downtown? YES.
A statue?
A tourist attraction?
[Rosie] YES
[Raak] YES
Oh and in general their is the odd approving noise from the audience
Nelson's Column?
[Raak] YES - audience cheering but then subsiding as that's the main dish, but the "side order" needs to be found too.
The actual statue of Nelson?
[Raak] Trafalgar Square? NO, that would be too easy... Some applause from the right wing of the audience.
The Fourth Plinth?
^[Software] NO.
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