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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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[rab] A cassette? YES!
* hands over a biro so you can rewind to the start of a new round*
Bollocks
I should know better than to post before buffering off to the pub for six hours.

Mine is ABSTRACT, potentially with connections to all three other categories.

The colour red?
[Chalky] Whence "phnarr phnarr", I wonder?
Reality?
Imagination?
music?
[Tuj] I first encountered it in the 80s via "Finbarr Saunders and his Double Entendres" in Viz magazine (once the 3rd most popular magazine in the UK!)
Colours - not even close.
Reality - only in the sense that this does have a physical manifestation.
Imagination - components might transpire as a figment of the same.
Music - no. But the general level of tangibility is not far off.
A human invention?
An artform?
As opposed to a specific piece of art.
Is this an emotion of some kind?
A performance of some kind?
(Tuj, Phil) I'm sure it was "Fnarr, fnarr".
April Fool?
Sorry for asking two questions but this one had to be asked.
Human? - very much so yes.
Artform? - to say yes would be deliberately obtuse, but the level of specificity is spot on.
Performance? - of some kind, I suppose so.
Ha ha bonk? - no
Is this an emotion of some kind?
On behalf of Dujon the Whisperer ;-)
Sorrow.
Emotional? No. Not that human.
Academia?
Lackademicals
No, but I like the cut of your jib.
Teaching?
A theory?
Teaching - no, but keep thinking about performances in the broader sense
A theory - no
Might this involve 'letters after ones name'?
Legal connection?
A medical connection?
Postnomials? Probably, but not necessarily.
Legal link? *applause* Yes, keep going
Medical? Possibly, but not necessarily.
Being called to the bar?
Mine's a small americano
Nope.
Evidence?
*ooh ahh* part of the performance certainly.
Cross-examination?
Making a statement?
A trial?
Prosecution?
Grumpy looks? No, but this is definitely involved.
Statement? Likewise
Inspiration for Kafka? audience oohs, aahs and generally inhales in a "that'll costya" kind of way no
Perspiration? No.
A tribunal?
Advocacy?
Tribunal? Not long, now.
Advocacy? Less abstract.
A court case?
Luggage? Nope. Keep going though.
Legal Aid?
The Supreme Court?
Unexciting fizzy drink? No
Cooked in stock and cream and served with rice to make an unfulfilling dish? Nein.
You were closest with the tribunal-style performance.
A Judgement?
A judicial review?
Public Inquiry?
A Royal Commission?
A verdict?
Got there in the end
Yay, Chalky. It was a public inquiry. Well done.
Yay. Nice one. Good to see you, rab.
As is my custom - a quickie ...
A N I M A L

Human?
[Raak] Human? YES - ish.
Politician?
Maria Miller?
An extinct hominid?
Sajid Javid?
Alive now?
[Gusset Login] - Politician? NO
[Software]- Maria Miller? NO
[Raak] - An extinct hominid? NO
[Projoy]- Sajid Javid? NO
[Rosie] - Alive now? n/a
A group of people?
A post or position?
To do with the military?
[Raak] A group of people? NO *a smattering of applause*
[Rosie] A post or position? NO
[Dujon] To do with the military? As much as 'it' is to do with any person or group of people.

*clarification* Without the indefinite article I assumed the one-word opening question was an adjective as opposed to a noun - hence my vague-ish reply.
Humanity? I.e. everyone?
[Raak] Humanity? NO - however, this relates to 'everyone'
A specific individual?
Part of a human?
The human genome?
[Projoy] Specific? NO
[Gusset Login] Part of a human? YES! *audience whooop whoops*
[Raak] The human genome? NO - although given my reply to GL above - more relevant than earlier guesses ;-)
An internal organ?
An organ?
Oops. I meant, a bone?
The bridge of the nose.
hehe
[GL] An internal organ? Arguably - YES, this is classified as an organ in most places [that classify such things].
[Projoy] YES an organ, still ... but definitely not a bone.
[rab] The bridge of the nose? NO - but *audience seems to like all the last few questions*
Is this (or these) particular 'empty' spaces within the human body?
The skin?
[Dujon] Empty spaces? NO
[Raak] The skin? NO
The blood?
Is it found at one specific location in the body?
The appendix?
[Raak] The blood? YES! Need a little more for the AOTC .. *roars of approval from a very excited audience*
[rab] Specific location? As confirmed above - several locations throughout the body.
[Phil] Appendix? Nah :)
The circulatory system?
[GL] Circulatory system? NO
The corpuscles?
[Raak] Corpuscles - NO - although they are relevant ..
Anything to do with the process of healing?
Red blood cells?
The immune system?
No to all - it's about Blood!
Blood BLOOD
Blood vessels?
A blood donation?
Seeing the word so often on the page, the voice in my head is now making it rhyme with "mood". mood ... blood ... food ... blood ... hood ... blood ... wood .. blood ...
Black pudding, then. So there.
[Software] I think Chalky said yes to "human?", so that would be quite some black pudding if it is right.
[Projoy] Not blood vessels
[Raak] Not a blood donation
[Software] Not a human black pudding.

Remember ... it's all about the blood.
blood plasma?
An armful (very nearly)?
Haemoglobin?
Is this a type of blood cell which has various types?
[Raak] Plasma? Not the AOTC
[Projoy] Not an armful
[Rosie] Haemoglobin? Not the AOTC
[Dujon] 'Various types' is a phrase which should lead to the AOTC ... *audience wakes up*
A rhesus negative?
What took you so long ..?
[Projoy] 'A rhesus negative' is about as close as anyone has come to the AOTC, with the exception of Raak who guessed the 'blood' word. As the AOTC is Rhesus Negative Blood I am thrilled to hand over this gargantuan syringe-shaped baton to do with as you wish ..
It may be just a smear to you, mate, but that's life or death to some poor blighter.
OK, here's another.

ANIMAL
Human?
[Rosie] Human? YES.
Alive?
A particular human?
[GL] Not alive.
[Phil] A particular human.
Died this year?
[GL] Mort MMXIV? NO
A pianist?
An actor?
Died this decade?
Involved in "the arts"?
... or even "the sciences"?
[Dujon] Pianist? NO.
[rab] Actor? YES.
[GL] Mort -10? NO.
[Phil] Arts? YES.
[Chalky] Science? NO.
Male?
British?
[Phil, Rosie] British and Male.
Has he starred in a major science fiction movie?
Died post 1990?
[Raak] SF movie? Pretty sure that's a NO.
[Chalky] Died after the Thatcher era? NO.
Died before 1970?
Died before the Heath era? YES.
Shakespearean roles?
Garrick?
Died before 1960?
#obsessingonthedeaththing
[Raak, Rosie] Not known for Shakespeare
[Chalky] Died since 1960.
Kenneth Horne?
Stan Laurel?
Vocalist?
[GL] Stiff Horne? NO.
[Phil] Resting Laurel? Another fine mess: NO.
[Software] If you mean singer, then NO.
Tony Hancock?
The lad himself
[Rosie] It IS Tony Hancock. Please take this radio aerial (and send a tray of bread pudding to Kuala Lumpur).
Part of my early teenage years. On the Home Service, no less, or was it the Light Programme? Can't remember. Now, what shall I do with this thing? Ah, yes -

ABSTRACT and MINERAL.

The Philosopher's Stone?
The last train?
Sonic Screwdriver?
A legendary object?
(Phil) Nothing so concrete.
(Projoy) Nice try, but alas....
(GL) No, not a latter-day Swiss Army penknife.
(Raak) YES, at least in the Abstract sense.
A particular vision?
(Dujon) YES, something specific.
Hidden textI am now going to bed
Human-made?
(Projoy) NO, not a human creation though the Abstract indirectly involves humans.
Something that might be studied by scientists?
(Projoy) They might, as an incidental, but it's not the flavour of the AOTC.
Anything to do with steam engines?
(Raak) Vocal traction? Not a scintilla, not a smithereen, not e'een a wisp of steam from a leaky cylinder gland.
Is a lake often associated with this?
(Dujon) NO, nothing to do with lakes.
To do with "The Arts"?
A corno da tirarsi?
A brass instrument that Bach specifies in four of his cantatas, but no-one knows exactly what instrument he meant.
(Phil) Nothing to do with The Arts.
(Raak) Not a little trumpet.
Hidden text(Welsh) corn bach
Metallic?
(Software) NO, not at all metallic.
A natural feature?
(GL) YES, a natural feature.
Giant's Causeway?
(GL) NO, nothing so hexagonal.
In the UK?
(Raak) Mineral - NO, Abstract - Mainly NO but could be.
Is the AOTC a mountain?
(Dujon) NO, not a mountain.
Are the abstract and mineral two distinct (essentially unconnected) meanings of the AOTC?
(CdM) The two are connected, one literal, one figurative.
Is this a weather feature?
(Chalky) Weather? Broadly, YES. *audience stops texting and looks up*
Does the word 'global' appear on the card?
(Dujon) "Global"? NO.
Is this a weather formation that was given a name?
Confused as always.
(Dujon) YES, it has a specific name but this is not normally regarded as a meteorological term.
Is this a form of wind pattern?
I know that I shouldn't but everyone else seems to have knocked off for the weekend.
(Dujon) NO, not a wind pattern.
Is it associated with deserts?
A dust storm?
(GL) Maybe a stronger asssociation with deserts than other places but a long way from exclusively so.
(Softers) Not a dust storm.
Is this 'object' a form of visual 'trickery'?
(Dujon) Visual trickery? NO, very real.
Associated with water or lack of?
(Chalky) Nothing to do with water, most certainly not.
Solar power?
(Chalky) YES, very much so. *audience goes positively orgasmic*
So is that the AOTC ...?
If it isn't I'm not quite sure where to go from here ..
Ra, the Sun God?
Apollo?
The sun?
(Chalky) NO, not the AOTC, but it's about the sun.
(Phil) NO, not Ra, not a God.
(Projoy) NO, not Apollo.
(Gusset Login) Yes, but specifically....?
halo?
Sunshine?
(Software) Not a halo.
(Projoy) The AOTC is much more specific.
A little ray of sunshine?
(Projoy) Rather more than that, it would seem.
A supernova?
A solar flare?
Solar winds?
(Raak, CdM, Projoy) Nothing as technical as these. An earthbound phenomenon, not a scientific term.
A sunbeam?
(Projoy) Not a sunbeam. This is probably more Art than Science.
Is this something like the sight of a huge cumulonimbus lit up by the setting sun?
(Dujon) A nice image that conjures up but alas NO. HINT: The AOTC is the name of a pub.
The Rising Sun?
(Chalky) NO, but very close. Move on a bit. *audience now hyperventilating dangerously*
The Midday Sun?
Thanks to Google
The Sun and Ferret Droppings?
The Setting Sun?
The Sun and Heir?
(Chalky, Projoy,Raak) Not the Sun and Trouserpress, either, for

Phil has it. The midday sun. Well done. Stay indoors.

As soon as I saw it was in Surrey, it had to be right.

Next, for your amusement and intellectual delight, we shall have:

Vegetable & Animal

Edible?
Well, that's a nice easy start :)
[Raak] Edible? YES
A chicken salad sandwich?
[Projoy] Chix Salad Butty? NO
Pub grub?
[Software] Is the AOTC "Pub grub"? NO, but it could be classified as such
Is the animal red meat?
Scampi and chips in the basket ?
very 70s
Is the vegetable potatoes?
A 'lunch' of some kind?
Scotch Broth?
[Rosie] Red meat? According to the USDA, YES, but in my personal opinion, NO.
[Software] Scampi? NO
[Raak] Potatoes? NO
[Dujon] some kind of 'lunch'? YES, it can be.
[Chalky] Scotch Broth? NO *some encouraging applause*
Some form of burger?
[Rosie] Burger? NO
soup?
Does it contain sausage?
Is bacon involved?
[Raak] Soup? YES *more applause*
[Rosie] Inc. sausage? NO
[GL] Bacon involved? NO * A smattering of applause*
Does this involve ham and peas?
[Dujon] Ham & Peas? YES *Considerable applause*
Pea and ham soup?
Does it begin with a...
Ahem.
[Tuj] But 3 hours too late :)
[Raak] Pea and ham soup? YES
Officially, as far as I could find, pork counts as red meat in the USA, and appears to be undefined here. But in my opinion, 3 categories of meat exist :red, white and processed, hence my awkward answer earlier.
*passes a breadstick to Raak*
The next is ANIMAL.
Is bacon involved?
Does this animal consume bacon?
[GL] Bacon is not involved.
[CdM] Does not normally consume bacon.
Is it human?
Alive?
[Gusset Login] Not human.
[Rosie] Alive.
One particular animal?
[Rosie] Um...yes and no.
An animal foetus perhaps?
[Dujon] Not a foetus.
A swarm of bees attacking Topshop?
Is it a parasite?
[GL] Not a swarm of bees.
[Dujon] Yes! It is a parasite.
A louse?
[Software] Not a louse.
Does it begin with P?
Does not begin with P.
Is this an internal parasite (as opposed to a tick or its ilk)?
[Dujon] Not an internal parasite.
Is it a Benefit Scrounger?
[Chalky] * laughter and applause* Yes, I suppose it is in a way.
A mosquito?
[Rosie] Not a mosquito.
Was this once used by doctors as a remedy for various ills?
[Dujon] Not a cureall.
Tick?
[GL] Not a tick.
Does it have a relationship with bats?
[Dujon] Not below the phylum level.
A bedbug?
Flea?
[CdM,Software] Not a bedbug or a flea.
Does the average Morniverser harbour this creature?
[Rosie] The average Morniverser probably does not harbour this creature.
Hint: think bigger.
Is this more likely to be found on something other than a human?
[Dujon] Yes, does not parasitise humans.
Some sort of worm?
[Projoy] Not a worm.
Hint: bigger!
Do the parasite and its host live in water?
[Dujon] Not in water.
A vampire bat?
Dracula? No.
Cuckoo?
[Software] **riotous applause!!** Yes, a cuckoo! But which one?
The first cuckoo of spring?
[Projoy] Precisely so!
My mind went straight to Delius as soon as cuckoos came up.

The next is MINERAL.
Well it would wouldn't it? Dear old Fred.
Is the mineral natural?
Sorry, I forgot I was supposed to ask a question.
Is it metal?
Is it edible/potable?
[Duj] Natural? NO
[GL] Metal? NO
[Chalky] Edible? NO * a reflective chuckle from an audient*
Stony?
So close, oh so close :(
[Software] Stony? NO, this falls on stony ground.
Sorry I pipped you. The late worm catches the bird, I guess.
Plastic?
[GL] YES, a form of plastic.
Decorative?
A form of packaging?
[Sw] Decorative? YES, mainly
[Rosie] Packaging? NO
Lycra?
[GL] Lycra? NO *scattered applause*
A clothing fabric?
Ladies clothing oriented?
Latex?
Spray-on jeans of the sort that have lately become fashionable?
[Phil] Clothing? YES
[Software] Ladies'? NO
[GL] Rubber? NO
[Raak] Sprayon? NO
Is this pants/trouser support?
[Duj] Keeps your panties on? NO.
Is it a codpiece?
Though I suppose that could arguably be described as "packaging"...
[blame] Codpiece? NO *audience applause*
Is it used in the undergarment department?
[Phil] Undies? NO
Cricket box?
Not sure if that's undies or overies. Now I'm working on a pun involving overs... Meantime I'm emboldened to guess by the applause, if not by the html, but also aware they'll applaud anything remotely saucy that lot...
[blame] Overies unlikely to be found in a cricket box, shurely? NO.
Rubber?
[Raak] Rubber? NO, definitely synthetic.
*googles* Oh, there is such a thing as synthetic rubber. Anyway, it's not that.
Is the item visible on a normally-clothed person?
a hat of some sort?
[Rosie] I don't know about "normally clothed", but YES, it would be visible on a person wearing it.
[Chalky] Hat? NO.
A condom?
A wet suit?
A superhero's cape?
[Chalky] Une lettre? NON
[Phil] Wet suit? NO *an audient smiles, teasingly*
[Raak] Cape? NO
Hi-Vis jacket?
Is it work-related apparel?
[Software] Jobsworth uniform? NO
[Raak] Job uniform? NO
An umbrella hat?
[Raak] If you want to get ahead? NO.
Is this designed to keep the wearer dry?
Mainly decorative you say ... ?
[Duj] For dryness? NO
[Chalky] Decorative? YES.
Is it made of neoprene?
A substantial fascinator?
[Phil] Neoprene? NO
[Raak] Fascinator? NO
Does this item have any lascivious connections?
Comedy apron?
Is this normally worn above the waist?
[Rosie] Naughty? NO
[Chalky] Apron? NO
[Dujon] Above the waist? YES.
below the neck?
[Chalky] Below neck? YES AND NO.
Scarf?
[Soft] Scarf? NO.
Is it a form of necklace?
... or necktie maybe?
[Dujon] Necklace? NO
[Chalky] Necktie? YES, a form of... *applause*
A noose?
[Raak] Synthetic noose? NO.
Bow Ties are cool
Is it? A dickie bow?
[blame] Not a dickybird from the audience for that, I'm afraid.
Cravat?
[Software] Cravat? NO.
PVC collar for the BDSM community?
,[Phil] Of Human Bondage? NO. As per Chalky's answer, the AotC is a form of necktie, or 'tie', as we Brits call it.
A policeman's clip-on tie?
In that case...
[Phil] Clip-on tie? NO.
A clerical collar?
Not female wear. .. and mainly decorative?
Just so's we're all on the same hymn sheet ...
[Rosie] Dog collar? NO
[Chalky] YES, a form of male (by convention), decorative necktie.
"Bolo" tie?
[Phil] Bolo? X.
One of those hideous things Texans wear?
[Soft] A "bolo" tie, as I believe they're called? NO
A kipper tie?
Is that why they applauded codpiece? For the cod, rather than - as it were - the piece...
[blame] YES! the words on the card are "a nylon kipper tie", and the fish connection was indeed the reason for the applause. *turns the baton around itself twice, folds the end through the gap, passes it through the loop, tightens, and hands it over to blamelewis*
I was fishing from the shoulders of giants...
Yay, whee, oh cripes do I have to do one now?

Errrrr... ANIMAL
A human?
A Duck?
The Duck-Man of Oswestry?
[Projoy] Oh I do hope that's right - we did a project on him at school.
No to all above sadly...
The Ocelot-Man of Oswestry?
The Owl-Man of Oswestry?
Part of a dead animal?
I fear Owestry has no part in it... And it's less part of a dead animal than the whole of a living one.
Mammal?
Fish?
Neither Fish nor Mammal.
Is it a bird?
dingdingding
[Rosie] Yes!
The Duck-Pigeon of Wrexham?
A penguin?
Associated with NE Wales?
The chick of Chirk. I know this part of the world rather well.
[Projoy] We need to have a talk.
[Gusset] Not a penguin.
[Rosie] Not to my knowledge.
Mythical avian?
A well-known phrase or saying?
So much for the Albatross of Acrefair, then.
A species of bird?
[Software] I have reasonably good reason to believe it's a real species
[Rosie] None that I've come across
[Phil] Yes, exactly that.
Does this bird fly?
Likely to be seen in a British back garden?
[Dujon] Shrewd. No it doesn't.
[Rosie] Alas no.
Is it a penguin?
Is it a Kiwi?
[Phil] Still not a penguin :)
[Gusset] Neither a Kiwi
An ostrich?
But not the Oswestry Ostrich, obviously.
Emu?
A dodo?
I know you said living but all the good answers were gone.
[Rosie] Obviously. Also, no.
[Software] U me? (no...)
[Gusset] I can promise you that just fewer than two good answers remain.
Is it extinct?
A bird that is to be found in northern Australia?
Grebe?
A cassowary?
(since Dujon never actually comes out with the guess) :-)
A gold star to CdM. What a morniverse-analytic person you are. :)
[Raak] Nope
[Dujon] Nope
[Gusset] Nope
[CdM] Nope
Rhea?
A caracara?
[Software] Not a Rhea, but Rare! (Not a Ratite, but a rarity)
[Phil] it is not, but thanks for introducing me to a new bird name...
A steamer duck?
Ostrich?
A recap
It's a non-mythical species of bird, flightless and rare.
It is none of the following:
Penguin, Penguin, Kiwi, Ostrich, Emu, Grebe, Cassowary, Rhea, Caracara, Steamer Duck, Ostrich.
A cryptic clue follows
Hidden textFilthy Teletubby!
The Kakapo of Ludlow?
The Po Bird?!
Is it someting along the lines of the Oomegoolybird?
This was posted via Eh-Oh L.
"Something". I have not gone Jamaican.
Penguin?
Projoy has it!
Apart from the Ludlow bit, as far as I'm aware...
[Gusset] A droll lol...
It is indeed the endearingly hopeless Kakapo, which I learned about from Douglas Adams' wonderful Last Chance To See and the later TV series with Stephen Fry and Mark Carwardine revisiting the species from the book years later.
[Rosie] I remember that joke, is it from Clue? "very short legs..."
OK, here's an ANIMAL, VEGETABLE and MINERAL
France?
Some form of food and drink?
[GL] France? NO
[blamelewis] Edible/Imbibable? NO
Can you wear it?
A gold embossed, leather bound book?
Arty?
Does the animal part relate to humans?
Is this an object once used in war and hunting?
[GL] Book? NO
[Raak] Art-related? NO
[Phil] Animal human? PARTLY/MAINLY, I suppose.
[Dujon] An object? NO. Used in war? ARGUABLY (but probably not that helpful an angle).
[Softers] Wearable? NO.
Is/was there just one of it?
[Raak] Just one? YES is the best answer.
The Earth, and all that is upon it?
A man-made environment?
[Raak] The cloud-capp’d towers, the gorgeous palaces, the solemn temples, the great globe itself, yea, all which it inherit? NO
[Rosie] A man-made environment? YES, I GUESS YOU COULD CALL IT THAT.
The Anthropocene Age?
[Raak] Humantime? NO
Is/was it in space?
[blame] In space? NO (except in the sense that everything is).
A theatre?
Can you see all of it at once?
[blame] Not a theatre.
[Rosie] Can you see it all at once? NO, not from most angles.
(I guess it depends how strict your definition of 'it all' is).
Bigger than a phonebox?
[Software] Much bigger than a phonebox.
Bigger than Ireland?
[GL] Smaller than Ireland.
About the size of Wales?
1 standard unit.
[Rosie] Smaller than a Wales.
Bigger than Kent?
[GL] Smaller than Kent.
A man-made island?
Bigger than Central London?
Within the M25
[Software] Not an island
[GL] Smaller than London, both in M25 and 1965 and 1899 boundaries terms.
er, 1889, I meant.
Bigger than the London Eye?
[GL] Yes, bigger than the biggest ferris wheel.
Is it an organisation?
[blamelewis] Organised? No, not as such.
A specific urban area?
[Rosie] A specific urban area? YES.
Slough?
In the UK?
[Software] Come, friendly bombs? NO
[GL] In UK? YES!
Is this an area which might be loosely termed as an 'entertainment' district?
[Duj] Entertainment? NO.
Is it a City?
Is it in Wales?
Is it a distinctive part of some large city?
[blame] City? NO
[GL] Wales? NO. *audience cries of 'bad luck, old chap'*
[Rosie] Distinctive part? NO.
Is it in England?
Shropshire?
[GL] England? YES!
[Software] Shropshire? YES!
Gotta be Oswestry.
[Rosie] Oswestry, home of the famous duck-man? YES! Please take this very short section of the England-Wales border.
Well, well, I've been Offa'd a Dyke. Oswestry was "town" to my Dad's family from Glynceiriog.

Enough of this rambling - the next object is

ABSTRACT with ANIMAL and MINERAL connections.

A human construct?
(Pj) A human construct? - YES.
Particularly linked to a specific human?
(CdM) Linked to a specific human? - NO.
Is there a religious theme to the answer?
(Phil) Religious theme - NO.

Clarification/Correction: The "human construct" applies to the wording rather than the idea itself.

Phrase or saying?
(Software) Phrase or saying? - YES.
Wales-related?
Is the animal element specifically human?
(Projoy) Nothing to do with Wales, or its border towns.
(Phil) Animal element human? - YES.
Is there anybody there?
(Rosie) Not a soul.
A fool and his money are soon parted?
I am
(Softers) So true, but not this time.

Hint: The AOTC contains no verb - it's a description.

So that'd be along the lines of a 'Man Mountain' then?
(Dujon) Possibly along those lines, YES.
Duck Face?
(Gusset Login) Not "Duck Face". *some aduience murmurings of approval*
Selfie?
(Gusset Login) Not a selfie.
Is the mineral naturally occurring?
(Dujon) Naturally occurring mineral? NO.
A photo bomb?
atomic or otherwise
Is this something related to some thing people wear?
(GL) Er, not sure what that is, but it ain't the answer.
(Dujon) No relation to anything worn.
Related to "The Arts"?
Something somebody does?
(Phil) The Arts and How They Was Done? NO.
(Software) Not a thing anybody does.
A type of person?
(Raak) Strictly, NO, but we may be getting somewhere. *audience, previously somnolent, now considerably animated*
A fictional character?
A role that someone plays?
(Phil) Fictional? NO. This is about real people.
(Raak) NO, not a role.
A job title?
(Phil) Job title? NO.
Raak's penultimate: The AOTC is not a type of person but describes a type of person.
A Fat Bastard?
A jobsworth?
(Software) Not a Fat Bastard.
(Raak) Not a jobsworth.
It's figurative - see the original definition.
Is this something one would be pleased to be described as?
(Raak) A nice description? Someone described thus may well say yes, but the vast majority, no.
Is the mineral metal?
Trying different line of attack...
(Phil) Is the mineral metal? YES.
Man of iron?
(Software) Not Man of Iron, nor Thatcher. Try just a little further up the Periodic Table.
Is it related to Polonium?
(Gusset Login) Polonium? NO. Not that far up the Periodic Table, nothing like it.
copper?
(Phil) Copper? YES, but not solely.
Bronze Age Man?
(Phil) Bronze Age Man? NO.
Brass neck?
(Software) Damn cheek, but the right answer! A Brass Neck it is. I hand you the brazen stick.
Gosh, I must get out the Brasso.

Now what have we here? The laser display board is showing the audience and the players are getting the clues:

This time it is ANIMAL

An individual?
A human?
Living?
Multi-YES!
In the entertainment industry?
Female?
[Raak] NO, would be the right answer
[GL] NO
Involved in politics?
[GL] In a way, YES.
Seen on TV?
Billy Bragg?
[Chalky] oh YES
[Pro} NO
In charge of a programme?
A presenter on current affairs?
[Rosie] NO
[Raak] NO
A comedian?
Anything to do with sport?
[Rosie] NO
[Raak] NO
An actor?
A peer?
[Phil] Not as such, NO
[Raak] NO
Something to do with 'reality TV'?
[GL] Big Brotherism? NO
Someone's side-kick?
[Rosie] Subordinate? NO very much his own man
Jeremy Clarkson?
Host of a TV programme?
[Raak] Wheel Spheel? absolutely NO
[Phil] Still not a TV presenter NO
known primarily for tv work?
Host of tv programme is not necessarily the same as in charge of one, or a news presenter.
[Phil] forget tv as a main issue NO
Involved in "the Arts"?
A scientist?
[Phil] arty farty? NO
[Rosie] Boffin? NO
Part of the financial world?
A doctor?
[Rosie] Wheeler dealer? NO
[cfm] Dr Whom? NO
Is the TV presence of primary importance?
[Rosie] NO not really but it is of some interest
Well-known primarily in the (still) United Kingdom?
[cfm] NO, pretty well known worldwide I'd say

Recap:
male, well known, not especially TV oriented, not an actor or a presenter but (clue) newsworthy.

[cfm] NO, pretty well known worldwide I'd say

Recap:
male, well known, not especially TV oriented, not an actor or a presenter but (clue) newsworthy.

A tycoon?
[Rosie] NO.
A musician?
[cfm] NO
Journalist?
You forgot to mention 'vague link to politics' in the recap.
[GL] Horrah! YES
Works for the BBC?
Mainly journalises for newspapers?
Piers Morgan?
[Rosie] NO
[Projoy] YES
[GL] Smarmy? NO
Would he be an ex-pat Australian?
[Duj] wizard of Oz? YES now we are cooking with gas!
Clive James?
[Phil] That Oz? NO
Not Rupert sodding Murdoch?
[Rosie] Absolutely NOT! - NO
John Pilger?
[Rosie] Not him either, but stick with the Oz theme. NO
Does this chap have a surname which is also a common given name?
[Duj] Daily Telegraph top 10 boys names? NO
Peter Greste?
Mark Austin?
[Phil] PG? NO
[Chalks] MA NO stick with the Oz theme
Aged over 50?
Leftish tendencies?
Regularly published in a UK Newspaper?
[Phil] > 50? NO
[Rosie] Red under the bed? YESish
[GL] Regular contributor? NO
Given your emphasis on OZ: Was this person involved with the OZ magazines?
Clarification: Oz = Australian. Anyway, the AOTC is under 50
Is this ex-pat Australian now based in the UK?
Richard Flanagan?
[Phil] In the UK? Well, technically, NO (but ponder on that)
[GL] had to Google him NO
Oh, it'll be that moron Julian Assange then, is it?
[Phil] That moron? - YES!

I didn't think that this would have taken so long, never mind, I now hand over the leaky baton to Phil!

Ithangyew, Software! Indeed, I think we could have got there earlier with the right questions. So lets be pressing on with

Animal

Human?
[Software] Human? YES
Alive?
[GL] Alive? NO
Died this century?
Begins with P?
Male?
Western?
Entertainer?
[Raak] 21st century death? NO
[Tuj] P-prefix? NO
[Rosie] Male? YES
[pen] Western? YES (unless you mean in the John Wayne sense)
[GL] ENtertainer? NO
Died before 1950?
[GL] Dead pre 1950? YES
Died before 1850?
Political connection?
[GL] Dead pre 1850? NO
[Software] Political connection? YES-ish
A scientist?
[Raak] Scientist? YES-ish, again
Was he an American inventor?
[Dujon] US Inventor? NO
A non-American Inventor?
Just to cover all bases.
Pre WWII?
German?
[GL] Any other inventor? NO
[Software] pre WWII? Yes
[Raak] German? NO
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle?
[Software] Sir A C Doyle? NO
Lewis Carroll?
[Rosie] Lewis Carroll? NO
72 hours without a question.
Time for a quick summary: A non-German western man who died between 1850 and 1939. Minor scientific and political connections. Neither an inventor nor an entertainer. Neither Arthur C Doyle nor Lewis Carroll. In addition, neither his Christian name nor surname begins with P.
On reflection I may have understated his scientific side, but would not call him a scientist.
Was he famous for something other than science and politics?
[GL] Famous outside of Science and Politics? YES *audience awakens from a short snooze*
Known as a philosopher?
Was he a neurologist?
[Raak] Known as a philosopher? NO
[Dujon] Do. neurologist? NO
A strong connection to medicine?
[GL] Strong connection to medicine? YES *some applause*
Louis Pasteur?
[Rosie] Pasteur? NON
Writer?
Was he a native English speaker?
(Yes, Americans and Australians count in this category don't be mean)
[gil] Writer? YES (be careful)
[GL] Native Anglophone? YES
Fiction?
[gil] Fiction writer? NO
British cinematic connection?
[Software] British cinema connection? YES, but only rather tenuously
A week since the last summary
So, all the previous summary plus: he has a strong connection to medicine and is a native English speaker who has written non-fiction works, has a rather tenuous connection to British cinema, is a native English speaker, and not Louis Pasteur, a philosopher or a neurologist. Other than "Western" we still don't know what nationality he is!
Canadian?
[GL] Canadian? NO
Scottish?
[GL] Scottish? YES *More Applause*
Dr Livingstone, I presume...
[gil] Correct. And have a bonus point for the question I was hoping to be asked.
A, V, M, a combination of these, or A
Begins with P?
Smörgåsbord?
[tuj] Doesn't begin with P
[Raak] not sm... what you said
A Scottish 'dish'?
[dujon] not a Scottish dish
Edible?
A collective noun?
Edible? While some varieties of this object are edible, the majority are not. It would mislead you to follow that line.
A collective noun? No. A noun? Yes.
Is the animal part a reptile?
[Dujon] The object on the card may be constituted from one or a number of components, one of which might conceivably be reptilian, though it's unlikely. Equally, another meaning of the above-mentioned object may be abstract. You may therefore assume that the object on the card is general rather than specific. Hope that helps. Actually, I once heard a team on the radio deduce this object in 20 questions to which the answers were restricted to Yes or No.
A work of art?
[Phil] Not a work of art, though I suppose someone could construe a particular example of this object as one. But the general run of objects like this have relatively mundane purposes.
An elephant's foot umbrella stand?
A Ball?
[Software] .... Almost...
[Gusset Login] You Win! Well done.
[Software] .... Almost...
[Gusset Login] You Win! Well done.
Double keypress glitch... Sorry
Next is MINERAL
Metallic?
[gil] Metallic? - No.
Solid?
[Raak] Solid? - No. (Assuming room temperature)
Liquid?
[Phil] Liquid? - No. (Assuming room temperature)
Would the liquid form of this element be rather nippy?
Part of the atmosphere?
[Dujon] Melting point more than 10 degrees Celsius lower than water? - Yes
[Rosie] In the atmosphere? - Yes, but probably not naturally to any great extent.
One of the rare gases?
[Raak] Rare/Noble gas? - No
CFCs?
Methane?
Flatulo ergo sum.
[Software] CFCs? *A smattering of applause* - No
[Rosie] Methane? - No
ozone?
Carbon dioxide?
[gil] ozone? - No
[Raaak] CO2? - No
helium?
Does it have a smell?
[gil] He? - No.
[Rosie] Smelly? - Yes.
Butane?
Hydrogen sulphide?
[Software] Butane? - No.
[Rosie] Hydrogen sulphide? - No.
Is this an NH compound commonly used in fertiliser and cleaning products?
[Dujon] NH? - No. Compound? - No. Commonly used in fertiliser and cleaning products? - Yes and No.
Chlorine?
[gil] Cl? - Yes. Have a baton made of purest chlorine. (Best hold your breath for a bit).
Abstract
Phrase or saying?
An emotion?
Begins with P?
Phrase? No
Emotion? Yes
Begins with P? Yes
Do some people suffer attacks of this for no obvious reason?
Panic?
Anything to do with fear?
Rosie wins. Raak a close second.
(Forgot to mention that Dujon was third. That was more like an attack of mass telepathy than an AVMA round)
Right then, it's ABSTRACT
Justice?
Is this usually a good thing?
(GL) Justice? NO
(gil) To most, YES, but in moderation.
Christmas Cheer?
(GL) Christmas cheer? NO.
Connected with the current season?
An emotion?
(Raak) Advent? NO. (nor any other season)
(Phil) An emotion? NO.
A condition, like peace?
(gil) A condition, such as peace. NO
An attribute, such as speed?
(gil) An attribute? YES, I'd say it is.
A skill?
Is the attribute associated with human beings?
(cfm) A skill? Not as such, but you may need it to bring this about.
(gil) A human attribute? NO.
Existence?
(gil) Existence? Rather less all-encompassing, so NO
(GL) The angular velocity of Resale Price Maintemamce? Sorry, but NO.
... stumped.
A sense?
(Phil) A sense? NO, but you need one of the senses to appreciate this.
A sound?
(Phil) A sound? YES.
The sound of one hand clapping?
Anything to do with steam engines?
(GL) Monochiral applause? NO.
(Phil) Steam engines? NO, although this has been mistakenly attributed to some of them by some writers. Hint I have another great interest.

AOTC is one word, a noun.

Thunder?
The sound of a trombone?
Music?
(Phil) Good guess, but alas WRONG.
(Raak) NO, not the 'bone.
(GL) Music? Well, actually, NO *audience now hyperventilating*
A whistle?
(Phil) A whistle? NO. (nothing to do with steam locos)

"Music" is not the AOTC, but.....

A Fanfare?
(GL) NOT a fanfare.
Muzak?
Melody?
(GL) Muzak? NO.
(gil) Melody? NO.
Jazz?
(Phil) NOT jazz, but heavily related.
Does this noun also describe animal droppings?
Sorry I'm late. The train was delayed.
(Duj) Can't quite see what you're getting at, but NO. molto con cowpat.
Blues?
A particular chord?
(GL) - NO, not the Blues.
(Raak) NO, not as particular.
Improvisation?
Is it a specific piece of music?
(Phil) Not improvisation.
(GL) Not a specific piece of music.
A musical form?
(Raak) A musical form? Strictly speaking NO, but that is in some ways misleading. Call it a feature.
A glissando?
(Phil) A glissandOOOOOoooooo? NO, but you're in the right area.
A trill?
crescendo?
(Raak) NOT a trill.
(gil) NOT a crescendo.

AOTC is one word.

Rhythm?
(Raak) Rhythm? You're getting very close.
Pitch?
Tempo?
(Phil) NOT pitch.
(GL) NOT tempo.
Not all music has the AOTC.
Swing?
(Raak) NOT swing, but swing often has this.
Syncopation?
(Phil) YES! Sin-coper-shone it is. Take this rather confused conductor's baton and proceed strictly alla marcia to The Next Object.
Ooh, a magical music stick
OK, for today's new guess-target, I am going to opt for:

Abstract and Animal

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?
Human?
Santa?
[GL] Rudoplh? NO. Although I wish I had done that now.
[Rosie] Human? YES
[Raak] St Nick? NO
Currently topical?
[Rosie] Topical? NO ... apols for the delay. And happy Christmas
Female?
[GL] Female? YES
Holder of an office?
[Rosie] Office-holder? NO
Alive at this moment?
Fictional?
A witch?
[Rosie] Alive at this moment? NO (although see below)
[GL] Fictional? YES
[Raak] A witch? NO
Did she have a few friends who were small in stature?
Did she once throw a metal bar torn off a street light at a talking lion?
Did she die in the work of fiction for which she is best known?
[Dujon] Friend of little people? NO, at least no more or less than anyone else, on average, I would surmise.
[Raak] Talking-lion-abuser? NO (I'm pretty sure that would have been mentioned, if she had)
[GL] Dead in fiction? NO
Is she best known for appearing in a film?
[GL] Best known as a film role? The answer would be different depending on whom you asked. For me it's a NO
Did she first appear in a book?
Was she created before July 12th 1956?
Raak - first in a book? YES
GL - Pre 12/7/56? YES
A child?
A children's book?
[Rosie] A child? NO
[Raak] Children's book? NO
Is she the title character of the book?
[GL] Title character? NO
A literary character?
[Rosie] Literary? YES
Nineteenth century?
A correction
[Rosie] On reflection "literary" can be taken by some people to mean "from great works of 'Literature'", although I don't know how one would define them. The AotC is a character from fiction, and I have seen her mentioned as a "literary character", although I wouldn't rate the "literature" as "Literature", but some probably would. In all, she's a character from a book or books.
[gil] C19? YES, but not exclusively.
Was the book in English?
Mrs Hudson?
[Raak] In English? YES
[GL] Mrs Hudson? When one has eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, is indeed Mrs Hudson. CORRECT. Congratulations!
Hmm... OK, next up is: ABSTRACT with ANIMAL connections.
Is the animal connection human?
[Phil] Human? - No.
Is it a characteristic of a particular animal?
A fictional animal?
[Rosie] A characteristic of a particular animal? No, but there is a connection.
[Phil] Fictional animal(s)? Yes
Mammalian?
[Knobbly] Mammals? Not primarily but some.
Do they talk?
Is it the cast of a particular childrens' book?
[Raak] Talking animals? Thankfully, No.
[Dujon] Cast of a particular children's book? No.
Do such animals also exist (or have they) in the real world?
[Raak] Real animals? Yes. (Or at least something similar in most cases)
Native to UK?
[Software] Native to UK? Some might be, others certainly aren't.
The story so far...
Fictional animals of multiple species almost all of which are non-mammalian and in as far as they can be identified, are probably based on real animals but not UK natives (probably). They are not from a children's book and they don't talk. The character of the animals is important but is not likely to be guessed in a "____ as a [Name of animal]" sense.
Taking a backward step: Did they originally appear in a book?
[Dujon] originally from a book? No but apparently books have been made since (including children's books)
Mythical?
[Raak] Mythical? No.
Bunnyish?
[Software] Non-mammalian bunnies? No.
Earth-based?
[Phil] Earth-based? Yes, but not earth-based versions exist.
Unicellular?
[Raak] Mono-celled? No
Clues
I think everyone is as bored of this as I am. Here are some hints to push the game forward to less boring, more finishing moves.

1. The AOTC is two words. One of these describes the non-mammalian animals and the other is an attribute that sets them apart from the majority of their real world counterparts. The whole is the name of a 21st century abstract that was not originally literature but has since spread to various other media.

2. The mammalian animals are a less well known aspect of the AOTC and except with regard to colour, clearly represent an animal that is common in the UK, US and several other places. The primary animals are less easily identified.
Desert Rats?
Cat girls?
[Phil] Dessert Rats? No (Rats are mammals)
[Rak] Cat Girls? No (Cats and Girls are both mammals)
lizards?
[Raak] lizards? No
Fish?
[Raak] Fish No
Birds?
[Raak] Birds? Yes
Angry Birds?
[Raak] Angry Birds? YES Let me fire this avian baton at you.
Next: MINERAL
Manufactured?
Metal?
[Rosie] Manufactured.
[GL] Partly metal.
Can you (or I) lift it?
Can we lift it? No, yes, or no, from various points of view.
Unique?
[GL] Unique.
Does it belong to a single person?
[Tuj] Does not belong to one person.
Is it a pyramid?
[Dujon] Not a pyramid.
In UK?
(amusement in the audience) Not in the UK.
Bigger than a phone box?
[GL] Smaller than a phone box.
Could it be called art?
Smaller than a breadbox?
[Rosie] Not art. [GL] Larger than a breadbox.
Is it assembled bit by discrete bit?
[Dujon] Assembled piece by piece.
A triangulation point at some particular place?
[Rosie] Not a trig point.
Does it have a technical application?
[Rosie] Yes, it has a technical application.
A light?
[Rosie] Not a light.
Does it begin with P?
[Tuj] Yes! Yes, it DOES begin with a P!
Was it manufactured in the twentieth century?
Is it associated with a particular type of geographical feature?
[Kim] Made in the 20th century.
[Rosie] Not associated with a type of geographical feature.
Would it be a product of WWII?
[Dujon] Not a product of WWII.
Oops, my answer to Kim was wrong. On searching out the date of its completion, I find it was not in the 20th century.
A telescope?
[Rosie] Not a telescope.
Philae lander?
And Knobbly scores a hole in one! Have this genuine Rosetta stone. My answer to the weightlifting question is explained by the fact that on Earth, it would weigh about 100 kg, which is more than I've ever bench pressed, but sitting on the comet it's estimated to weigh about 1 gram -- but you can't get there to lift it.
Sorry Tuj, was that where you were heading?
Next up is Vegetable
Is it edible?
Well, someone has to kick it off.
Alive?
Wooden?
Is it unique?
[Knobbly] One letter at a time? No =)
Does it have a practical use?
[Raak]
Hidden textMeasuring weight in g/kg rather than N?
Some catching up to do...
[Dujon] No, not edible (is the least misleading answer, although everything is edible once)
[GL] Yes, alive
[Phil] Yes, wooden *ripple of applause*
[Tuj] Yes, unique (or at least specific)
[Raak] No practical use
Does it live in Sherwood Forest?
Is it unusually old?
Is it a fruit tree?
[Dujon] Not in Sherwood Forest
[Raak] (Back from checking something I probably should have before starting) No, not unusually old
[GL] Not a fruit tree
Is it in the UK?
[Rosie] Yes it is in the UK
A specific sycamore?
[Dujon] Not a sycamore, no
Royal?
Is it a specific tree?
I thought I'd ask in case we were heading in the wrong direction.
Why did the internet eat my post twice?
[Raak] Royal connection, yes indeed
[Dujon] A specific tree, yes
[GL] Yes, an oak!
*Audience beside themselves with mild interest*
Oak Apple Day?
[Software] Not the 29th of May... A custom worthy of revival but not really a specific tree
Is it a son/daughter of a famous oak?
That Royal Oak wherein King Charles II hid from the Roundheads?
[Dujon] Do you know, I can't find out if there was any genetic continuity, but I'd be surprised if there wasn't... I'm going to unilaterally change your question and say yes it is a successor to a famous oak
[Raak] Not that Royal Oak, no
Merlin's Oak?
[Phil] Not Merlin's Oak
One of the Tree Council (UK)'s "Great British Trees" in 2002?
[Phil] Not a Great British Tree
In Kent?
[Phil] Not in Kent
An extant oak tree?
Does the royal aspect of the answer arise from a royal planting the acorn?
[Phil] Yes, an extant oak tree
[Dujon] Hmm... Well, the extant oak tree which is the AOTC was royally planted, but the royal connection was already there. I realise that wasn't a yes/no answer
(Although I rather expect the 'planting' was a photo opp holding a spade next to a sapling rather than heeling in an acorn)
Did the planting happen after the invention of photography?
[GL] Yes, photography had been invented. Can't find a photo though...
It's gone a bit quiet, shall I re-cap?
This Vegetable is a living oak tree, which is not itself unusually old, nor is it one of the Great British Trees. It was royally planted (although a royal connection already existed) and is neither the Royal Oak in which King Charles mk.2 hid, Merlin's Oak or in Kent.
Is it in England?
Being an ex-pat for nigh on sixty years this is becoming something of a guessing game to me. It's time to narrow the focus.
[Dujon] Yes, in jolly old England
Is it north of Watford?
[Raak] Yes, north of Watford.
South of Hadrian's Wall?
Mmm,
That was otiose, reading above.
In Yorkshire?
[Software] Yes, south of Hadrian's damp-course, and not in Yorkshire
North of London (Charing Cross, just in case)
[Phil] Yes, north of London (as implied by being north of Watford)
The Midland Oak?
[Raak] Not the Midland Oak
I'm trying to think of a clue that isn't just giving away the answer...
Selly Oak?
[Phil] Not the Selly Oak
Hidden textTry and find out who the royal is
Is the royal Queen Victoria?
[Raak] Not Queen Vic
Is the royal female?
[Phil] She is a female royal
Queen Anne?
Our current Head of State?
A British royal?
[Raak] Not Queen Anne
[GL] Yes, a British Royal
[Dujon] Yes, the oak you could visit now was planted by our current Head of State but I'm not sure how helpful that is, she must have attended many tree plantings in her time... Keep finding out who the original connection was - I reiterate, she is a female British royal who is neither Queens Victoria nor Anne.
The good old late Queen Mum?
[Software] Not the Queen Mother
QE 1?
[Raak] Yes, Queen Liz the 1th
Is there also a direct connection to QE1's sister Mary?
I think the answer must be what you find if you google "Queen Elizabeth I" and "oak", but I'm going to be away a lot in the next few weeks, so I'll leave it to someone else.
[Dujon] Yes, a connection to Queen Mary also
[Raak] You can find the answer that way, yes... Who will do so?
Queen Elizabeth Oak, at Hatfield House?
Absolutely right... you even chose the right Queen Elizabeth Oak (not the one in Cowdray Park). The current tree was planted by QE2 in 1985 on the site of the original tree, beneath which Elizabeth was sat when told that Queen Mary had died and she was now the queen.
I really didn't think I'd chosen a hard one...
I pass Phil the baton, made of exquisitely turned english oak.
Re - hard ones
[Knobbly] It happens. I remember setting Jeffrey Dahmer a few years ago, and was astonished to find no-one knew who he was. He's a household name in our family. But, thanks to Google, and Raak, I've know heard of Hatfield, its house, and its trees.

Mineral, Animal and Vegetable

Human construct?
A town or city?
Does it begin with P?
[Knobbly] Well lasted =)
[Software] Human Construct? Ummm, no, I don't think so (although I've always been rather vague about what "human construct" means).
[GL] Town or city? NEITHER
[Tuj] Pstarted? NO
Bigger than a K6 telephone box?
Is there just one?
Is either the Animal or Vegetable human?
[Software] Bigger than telephone box? YES
[Raak] Unique? YES
[GL} Human? NO
Is it in Britain?
[Raak] In Britain? YES. most definitely
A building?
[Software] A building? NO, although it includes a building or buildings
Is it a region of some description?
Some form of animal sanctuary?
[Knobbly] a region? NO
[Rosie] an animal sanctuary? NO *much laughter*
A farm, then?
[Rosie] Farm? YES, slightly surprisingly
Chalk Farm?
[GL] Chalk Farm? NO
On reflection, my answer to Is the Animal or Vegetable human? could be YES - with a little chuckle from the audience.
A non-fictional real-life farm? (...which we've heard of?)
[Knobbly] YES-ish. You will have heard of it, I expect, but you may not be aware that it functions as a farm.
A royal estate?
Belonging to the Prince of Wales?
[Dujon] Royal estate? NO *audience wakes up*
[Raak] PoW-owned? NO
Belonging to a religious institution?
[Raak] Religious? NO
Is it a tourist destination?
[Raak] Tourist destination? NO, or if it is I'd be surprised
Is this farm maintained by people detained at Her Majesty's pleasure?
[Dujon] HMP-farm? NO
Is it in England?
[Raak] In England? YES
Does anyone live there except the farmers?
[Raak] Non-farming inhabitants? YES
Privately owned?
[Raak] Privately owned? NO *some applause*
Porton Down?
[Rosie] Porton Down? NO
Is it in a National Park?
[Raak] in a National Park? NO, but it is in an AONB
Stonehenge?
[Software] Stonehenge? NO
A similar monument?
A research establishment?
[Software] Stonehengey-type-monument? NO
[Rosie] Research establishment? NO
Some clues from answers already given
"Royal estate" woke the audience up, but it's not privately owned, and not owned by Prince Charles. It includes buildings and farmland, and is in an Area of Outstanding National Beauty in England.
Longleat?
Ah ... just spotted the 'not privately owned' bit. Scrub that attempt please.
The New Forest?
[Chalky] New Forest? NO (and not Longleat either, of course)
In Cornwall?
[Rosie] Cornwall? NO
Another clue
In the Home Counties
Legoland?
Hampton Court?
Aha! NOT a tourist destination eh?
Um, the estate surrounding Hampton Court containing the piggeries and grouse shooting, where tourists never go?
[Software & Raak] Neither Legoland, nor Hampton Court. Nor the estate surrounding it.
The Chilterns?
[Chalky] The Chilterns? NO *huge applause from audience who thought it was all over, for a moment*
The Chiltern Hundreds?
[Raak] Chiltern 100s? NO *Audience apologises for over-reacting earlier, leading to the thought that "chiltern" is in the answer*
One of the nuclear places near the Kennett valley?.
Is it an SSSI?
[Rosie] One of those nuclear type things? NO
[Chalky] An SSSI? NO, but I think it includes part of one, but I can't be 100% sure.
The Ridgeway?
[Chalky] Ridgeway? NO, but the Ridgeway does pass through it. *Applause, from me for remembering where I've been recently, and from the audience too
Salisbury Plain?
So-called. Actually the very opposite.
Chequers?
... piecing together the clues
Uffington White Horse?
[Rosie] Salisbury Plain? NO
[Software] Uffington White Horse? NO (although I was there the day before I was at the AOTC, in Feb this year)
[Chalky] Chequers? YES - the estate, that is, rather than just the house that lies within. And what splendid timing for me to hand over the leadership of this fine game to you, given that we don't yet know who'll be spending their weekends there for the next five years.
We do now.

Time for an ANIMAL
Human?
A politician?
[Software] Human? NO
[Raak] A politician? NO
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