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AVMA Take 2
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Yes, it's another round of that classic guessing game - Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Abstract [or any combination thereof]. This effort - '03/'04 should address any queries, but then again, may just serve to confuse and baffle which some might say is the point of the game. Patience, integrity and a decent search engine may be useful ....
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Does the game involve equipment of some kind?
Do the players typically get muddy?
[Phil] Competitions?   YES. I know of at least one.
[ImNotJohn] One culture?   NO. I think.
[cfm] Equipment?   YES-ish. Players need an item to play the game, but calling it equipment is perhaps misleading. Would the pies in a pie-eating contest be called equipment?
[Raak]   Mud glorious mud? NO. But the opportunity is there.
Cheese-rolling?
Does the 'equipment' constitute the vegetable and mineral part of the definition?
[Phil] Chasing Cheese?   NO.  
[NotJohn] 'Equipment' vegetable/mineral?   YES for vegetable traditionally.   Some mineral items can also be used. *Audience applause and murmur*
Is it a game in which two people play against each other?
Is there a non-human animal connection?
Does this involve the throwing/tossing of an object?
Does it involve climbing?
Is the vegetal matter wood?
[Raak] One-against-one? YES.   Or more than two. At least two.
[cfm] Non-human animal? In an abstract way, there is a connection, so YES.   *Audience mutter*
[Dujon] Tossing? YES *A ripple of applause*   Or at least using gravity.
[NotJohn] Climbing? NO.
[Phil] Vegetable wood? YES! *A wave of applause*   The vegetable part could also be a mineral to play, but in the origins of the game, it was vegetable (wood).
Poohsticks?
Golf?
Winner!
[Raak] A hole in one?   NO.
[NotJohn] Poohsticks?   YES!!   Your stick has passed under the bridge first.
Hands NotJohn a somewhat moist twig.
It's the little flick of the wrist as you drop it that makes all the difference.
OK, this one is VEGETABLE or (ANIMAL with ABSTRACT connections)
Wooden Horse?
[Phil] Sylvan equine? - NO
A vegetable?
As in, "a vegetable" being the answer, metaphorical for someone irreversibly brain-dead.
Some great guesses here
[Raak] Vegetable vegetable? - NO
Trojan Horse?
Is this a homograph?
A wooden sculpture?
A swede?
[GL] Trojan Horse? - NO
[Chalky] Homograph? - Tricky, I think it could be argued either way, but I'd go for - NO
[Raak] Wooden Sculpture? - NO
[Dujon] Swede? - NO
Is the Animal a human?
Is it usually eaten?
[Chalky] - Human animal? - YES
[Boolbar] Usually eaten? - NO
Made of paper?
[CdM] Papery? - NO, but * a few suppressed chuckles in the audience*
Is it unique?
Made of wood?
Some progress
[Boolbar] Only 1? - YES for the Animal
[Phil] Woody? - YES for the vegetable
Fictitional Animal?
[Chalky] Fictional Animal? - NO
Is it a tree?
Aha!
[Boolbar] A Tree? - YES *prolonged applause*
Family tree?
[Software] Genealogical? - NO
A specific kind of tree?
Warm
[CdM] Specific kind of tree? - YES *further applause*
Rowan?
Tree of Life?
[Phil] - Rowan? - NO? (So not ROWAN Atkinson, nor ASHley Cole, nor Gabriel OAK, etc)
[cfm] Tree of Life? - NO
Joshua Tree?
[cfm] U2 Tree? - NO (I wondered if someone would guess that)
There is no cheating or discrepancy going on here - the answer, exactly as stated on the card, is both a kind of tree and a unique human animal. Attacking either part is possible. Perhaps inevitably some people will find one alternative easier than the other.
Sequoyah?
[Raak] Sequoia? - NO (I'll look up your spelling - mine is that required to make it the equal shortest word containing all vowels once only)
{Raak] Isn't that fascinating - thank you. It's also a very good guess. Just happens to be incorrect.
Is the tree an evergreen?
Is the unique human male?
[Boolbar] Evergreen - YES
[cfm] - male? - YES
Did he die before 1900?
Died pre-1900? - NO *the audience is hushed*
Courtney Pine?
[Chalky] Courtney Pine? - NO
Stan Laurel?
[Phil} - A laurel called Stan? - NO
Just a a gentle prod, the person is probably the harder element to get for most of you.
Is it a pine tree?
[Boolbar] A pine? - Technically NO, but commonly YES *applause*
Scots pine?
A fir?
[cfm] McPine? - NO
[Raak] Firry? - NO
The monkey puzzle?
I thank my dear late father for one of his useless facts.
Araucaria
We have a winner AND we have a winner
The answer on the card is Araucaria, aka the Monkey Puzzle tree or the Chilean Pine.
Araucaria is also the pseudonym of the Rev. John Galbraith Graham, the doyen of British cryptic crossword compilers, who recently announced that he is suffering from terminal cancer using the answers to clues in one of his puzzles to do so. (Araucaria is suffering from 18 down of the 19, where the clue to 18 down was 'Sign of growth (6)')
Well then, now what do I do - Phil is exactly right, but he set the last one and in the absence of his answer I would have allowed Software's, so I will.
One 'Stick to continue the innings (5)' passed on to Software.
Department of Corrections
That's 'last but one'
Indeed, I meant to add that if I got that right, I would give the baton to Software, as I would not have got it without him. I remember the day (probably early 1990s) that I discovered what the crossword compiler's name meant. I hadn't heard about his illness though. Anyway, onwards and upwards (or downwards and acrosswards)
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