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Good News / Bad News
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Right, another chance to alternately build our spirits up and then disappoint them. I can't be bothered to change the winning move so it's still Mornington Crescent.
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Bad News
Unfortunately, you get swindled when you try to buy some E and then realise the old biddy actually sold you enalapril, an anti-hypertensive.
Good News
You crush it up and snort the lot and experience a massive wave of relief and joy as the tension oozes out of every pore.
Bad news
But then you collapse on the floor due to a massive hypotensive effect.
Good News
Lib is there watching you and rushes in to help with her trusty stethoscope !
Bad News
The floor is weakened by the rush of activity and opens up, you both fall, head first, deep down into the underworld.
Good News
It's remarkably similar to London, so you already know your way around.
Bad News
But the sulphurous fumes coupled with the fact that all the transport runs efficiently and on time, leaves you significantly disorientated.
Good News
You realise, after a while, that you are in Dnepopetrovsk, and vodka is very, very cheap.
Bad News
Vodka makes you come out in spots. All over.
Good News
Hot mud packs make one look much younger than one actually is and, as an added benefit, cure acne, red-eye and gout.
Bad News
But tastes bloody awful in vodka
Good News
The vodka company give you a lifetime's supply to compensate.
With that quantity of bad vodka, your lifetime is likely to be very short.
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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord