I am not wearing a gnome's hat and ears, attached by elastic under my chin.

'Tea and cucumber' is my favourite sandwich filler.

Suddenly I find that I no longer fear for Tuj' sanity.

Halloween derives from the ancient custom of introducing yourselves to your neighbours as winter draws in so that anyone who is new to the area following the summer's inevitable house churn will have someone to talk to over the long cold season.

Pumpkins are elastic and can be expanded by vigorous inflation with a bicycle pump.