Mutton can be used as paper.

If you find you appreciate art too much, your best bet is to take an anaesthetic.

[Projoy] Does calculating your position using Pythagoras' Theorem involve using a right East Anglian?

Most Roman mosaics are actually massive Rubik's Cubes that have gone stiff and settled in one configuration. The pictures they appear to show are projections from the viewers mind.

"A right East Anglian" is a euphemism in the church for anyone who routinely appoints gay bishops.

My bishop has been deceased since 1985 but still says Sunday mass with the aid of a truss, two vicars, and a ventriloquist.

Conifer trees are very militaristic. During the cold war, hundreds volunteered to leap into the Arctic Ocean and scud around under the Polar ice cap looking for enemy submarines.

Privet bushes can reach speeds of nearly 200mph on the flat.

Pot Noodles are highly nutritious

They are also deadly when armed with a straw and a small handful of frozen peas

Frozen peas should under no circumstances be defrosted without adequate radiation shielding and a written promise from the President of the US that they won't view it as a hostile act.