mc5 - ... so help me God.

However, I have ruined my own invention by also creating the all-soap ploughman's lunch.

My jars of pickle all just flew off my desk, politely waited until someone opened the door, then made off down the corridor.

Projoy

[Thos] Ah. Nostalgia! My father was an All-Soap Ploughman.

Dunx

The word "shallot" is too selfish to pass the sugar when asked.

Dunx

My brother's trampoline has been knighted for services to raspberries.

Dunx

I have a brother.

Dujon

None of the Brothers of whom I have heard are considered to be 'one of the lads'

Projoy

My broom is my best friend.

Bob the dog

Lost X-rated Shakespeare scripts include Price of Denmark II - More Gore at Elsinore, The Merry ****s of Windsor (in which Fellatio returns from Venice, Bottom reappears and the messenger has a big part) and Bagpuss.

Ibid

I was driving from Oslo to Stavanger, and was tailgated by a large lobster the entire way.

Projoy

Our Chief Executive has been replaced by an Executive Chief, complete with feathery headdress, totem pole and attaché case.