mc5 - ... so help me God.

The buns in my kitchen are plotting against the loaves in the freezer.

Kate Adie has been despatched to report on the coup d'toast in Ibid's kitchen.

I have just invented a cheese magnet which can attract pickle

However, I have ruined my own invention by also creating the all-soap ploughman's lunch.

My jars of pickle all just flew off my desk, politely waited until someone opened the door, then made off down the corridor.