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... so help me God.
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I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth...
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Scientists have conclusively proved that the most satisfied a human can be is when it has removed all the grit from under its fingernails, provided there are no oranges in the vicinity.
"Tuj" is actually aboriginal for "thanks for sharing".
By rubbing in a tablespoon of lemon juice, a tablespoon of malt vinegar and a tablespoon of single malt whiskey to a stain on white or pale fabric, one can easily add three new types of stain to one's laundry!
My friend Scott is not the living embodiment of Doctor Who.
Tomato ketchup has nipples, it turns out.
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