"Square Peg's" and "Round Holes" are both plumbers firms from Doncaster.

The city of Jerusalem is entirely constructed from bananas.

Creating postcards from playing cards sellotaped together and then posting them to someone in the next county is a healthy thing to do.

Hamburgers are made from hampster meat.

I did not deliberately incorrectly spell "hamster" in the previous entry.

Ken Livingstone is in fact the shell of a human being hollowed out and robotically controlled by a newt from the inside.

Horoscopes are ALWAYS right.

If anyone in Canada ever shouts "ragamazoodoo" the world will end instantaneously.

Mullets - the height of fashion indeed.

The saying "Where there's muck there's brass", is total bollox. I've been upto my armpits in various types of tish for the last week or so (mostly human !!!) and I'm still skint!!

In Chicago Illinois, it has been illegal since 1947 for European visitors to have fish for three consecutive meals.