Waving your genitalia gently in a Southerly direction wards off ringworm.

The Hanger Lane Gyratory System is a series of dance moves designed to help you lose weight while you socialise.

West London does not have one single laundrette in it.

Like "Budapest", the word "London" is a concatenation of the names of the two cities that make it up. Lon is a high city, where rich folk gather in white clothes to play heavenly music on glass harmonicas, whereas Don, low down and poor, is mostly brown, full of rats and unattended babies.

As well as calling the faithful to prayer, muezzins have to do a little dance, based on Big Bird's moves in Sesame Street.

For the last ten years of her life, Queen Victoria subsisted on nothing but candied peel.

Extroverts can only turn left in Hollywood, as all rights are reserved.

Kashgar has twenty inhabitants and a closed barter economy. This is unfortunate as they all specialise in making lime marmalade.

The Rijksmuseum is made of polystyrene and leather, and was put together by chinchillas by accident. Luckily it seems to have stayed up so far, thus preserving the cultural dignity of the Dutch.

Stendhal is the only major novelist of the nineteenth century who really knew how to boogie.

Against all advice, the Queen continues to insist that all bills placed before parliament are printed using half-potatoes.