There will be a 33.25% chance of rain today and a 12.5% chance of snow. Sunshine is 8% likely and a warm dry day with no sun is a 25% chance. Cool and overcast is 20% likely. So that leaves a 1.25% chance of no weather at all. I'm Peter Snow, goodnight.

If you're going out today, make sure to take with you 40% of an umbrella, 10% of a pair of wellies, and 5% of a tube of sunblock.

[Raak] I was watching the weather report the other day and it stated a 50% chance of rain, essentially meaning that either it will rain or it won't. How very helpful.

(nfras) What would you like them to have said, given the inherent uncertainty in weather forecasting?

[Rosie] "It could do anything, if you look out of your window you'll have a better idea than we do."

Are the stars out tonight? I don't care if it's cloudy or bright, for I only have eyes for yooooou...!

Owing to a widespread attack of pathetic fallacy, tomorrow's weather will be determined by the collective mood of the populace. So please cheer up, you miserable buggers.