The big hand is pointing somewhere between the twelve and the one, the little hand is pointing somewhere between the three and the six. So it must be twenty past twelve. or so. ish.

At the third stroke it will be three eighty-six and ninety seconds.

At the third stroke, Mr. Bond, the device will detonate. Say your prayers, 007.

:)

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Leaving Mr Bond on a cliffhanger, we move on to: Personal Trainers

Got a light?

The best thing for a broken leg is to just keep on running. The more it hurts, the more it's healing.

Look! The sooner you finish the two press-ups, the sooner we can get down to the Sunday Buffet at the Chinese. It's 9.99 for everything you can eat today.

I steal your girlfriend!

Well if you can't be bothered, neither can I.

No, I promise you, it's just a vitamin supplement.