mc5 - The Obligatory Limericks Game Reincarnated

A pack of Snopake^®

And a ticket for something by Feydeau.

While skiing one day in Zermatt

I chanced on a leprechaun's pot

I solved the Last Problem of Fermat (Juxt) That doesn't come anywhere near a rhyme. i'm leaving mine in.

But writing quite large in [Rosie] Hmmm. I read Marc's line as While skiing one day in Zermatt (which I think puts the correct stress in the place name), not While skiing one day in Zermatt. I agree you need a pretty strong (perhaps American?) accent to rhyme it with 'pot', though.

So, come to think of it, I'll bifurcate:
But, sadly, inside / But writing quite large in

zermatt, the stressed syllable of which does indeed rhyme nicely with "pot" to a Yank.

A problem I spied/The edge of the margin

Made both my skis freeze on the spaht / Made me think of old Father Dermat

This is, apparently, the correct pronunciation - whatever accent one has :-)

In order to find my religion

I launched my best trained homing pigeon

She returned in a day

To show me the way

To Mecca. She erred by a smidgeon

[M, i, S and CdM] bravo :-)

While cleaning out my old chest freezer

To my horror, I found Julius Caesar

For a chap who was dead

Phil

He looked very well-fed

Chasty

Though his stiffness so cold couldn’t please ‘er

Gather round, for I'll sing you a song!

Phil

"The Ballad of Fay and King Kong"

The note, maestro, please

Is the flattest of 'C's

Is the flattest of 'E's
Simons Mith - Could you gimme Big Ben for a bong?

According to my research, Big Ben was actually cast in E.
[Juxt] Hope you don't mind.

In order to sing out of tune

I borrowed a helium balloon

I then took a deep breath

Quendalon

Smoked a big hit of meth

Simons Mith

Now I sound like Eccles the Goon

The trouble with playing E Flat [SM] no worries

Raak

Is it startles my neighbour's tomcat

Quendalon

When that beast starts to yowl

My dog starts to howl

So I clubbed them both with my bat

The problem with clubbing ones pet

Is rather large bills from the vet

Raak

Plus a call from the Plod

And the vengeance of God

Simons Mith

And that's why I've not done it, yet

I think we should all have a party

Watson, let's not invite Moriarty

[irach] sorry to interrupt - but does your line scan - like really? Or is it just me that's having difficulty. I'm surprised - because you're usually spot-on in scansionland.

Phil

[Chalky] it scans for me: Watson, let's not invite Moriarty.
Mrs Hudson will strip

[Chalky] Sorry to offend. But Phil seems to feel the same way I did on the scansion when penning...er, posting the line.