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The Obligatory Limericks Game Reincarnated
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And so it begins....
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And swallow them whole
'Til such greed took its toll
And a pig plugged his arse like a cork
If you eat too much meat please beware
Of the fate that befell Red Adair
The lard in his veins
Caused cardiac strains Actually, he lived to be 89
That gave him and his mum quite a scare
I played on my violoncello
A tune that was soothing and mellow
It brought to my mind
A view, well-defined
Of a man with a lit cigarello
Don’t smoke when you visit this site
Our eyes will get clogged we can’t write
And lay off the booze
R'else we'll all start to snooze
So do nothing to make us up-tight
I don't rate this double-line stuff Too easy
I like it when the rhyme's tough
If I feel it's too easy
If the topic is cheesy
Yes, I like my limericks rough! Grr!
There's an isle in the southern Pacific
Its coordinates not quite specific
Latitude though is lazy
And longitude hazy
Worth getting there though - it's terrific
“My good man,” the Cannibal said,
"I think you'd go well with some bread"
"Please jump in this pot"
"Be careful, it's hot"
"And then simmer down 'til you're dead"
I've just told a whopping great lie
'Twill haunt me for ever, oh my
As I said to my Miss http://www.missworld.com/
It goes something like this
"For you, the Hope Diamond I'll buy"
There once was a cat called Sylvester
A birdie named Tweety he'd pester
Though bird meat is tasty
He swallowed too hasty
And in his belly the feathers did fester
A birdie ran past saying "Meep!"
Sped away from Wile E.'s fast jeep (An Acme Brand Mail order jeep, of course)
He ran over thin air
Using some Acme affair
A plot device which made me weep
As I think back on Tom and on Jerry
And how their antics made me merry
I find, on reflection
I've lost all affection
So have I gone grumpy? Yes, very.
The thing about Samurai Jack [Brilliant cartoon, highly recommended[
Is that when he'd prepare to attack
He could not find his sword
For he couldn't afford
A vorpal that went snicker-snack
When the wind blows from north by northwest
I always get very depressed
As the low-pressures form
Is nowt but a yawn dodgy, I know
'Xcept to forecasters, whom all detest. Dodgy???? Crap more like. ©H. Laurie. I dunno, man of your calibre. ©A A Hancock.
Just close your blue eyes and you’ll see
That everything's as dark as can be
For it seems that the sun
(Without which we're done)
Is no longer shining for free
Has Rupert Murdoch bought the sun to go with the newspaper of the same name then?
That's a good idea - a bonfire of his penny dreadfuls with him as the guy.
I've just bought some shares in the sun
With a lottery prize that I won
It's a hot property
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