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The Obligatory Limericks Game Reincarnated
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And so it begins....
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Rosie
E'en when their patience is taxed
Projoy
Can I suggest a tweak?:
Though their patience must sorely be taxed
By the wool in their eyes
CdM
And so it's no surprise
muttleee
That they're calmest when recently waxed
Pablo
So may we now welcome the spring?
Raak
Or is it but premature bling?
CdM
Should we really focus
Bismarck
On tulips and crocus
Projoy
Late April, O where wert thy schwing?
CdM
Although last month was awfully cruel
CdM
Often I come back and re-read these lines, and find the scansion/stress in my head is less clear on the page. :(
Although
last
month was awfully cruel
Software
So cold it used up my fuel
Raak
("...
all
my fuel"?)
The forecast's Set Fair
Projoy
For somewhen; for somewhere
Chalky
So will now head south-east to Kitzbühel
Bismarck
Take one pound of self-raising flour
Projoy
And some free range eggs into the shower.
Chalky
Add dandruff shampoo
goldfinch
And a bath bomb or two
CdM
Then bake Gas Mark 4 for an hour
Projoy
I unwisely deployed a molossus
Rosie
A poetical speed-bump to boss us
(Pj) That was
difficult
Bismarck
The confounded thing
Chalky
Took an almighty swing
Projoy
And impacted my smarting probscis
When it's Friday you don't seem to know it
Chalky
Then you're told it's the Day Of The Poet
Rosie
But most say "Thank God"
Software
This verse is not cod
Invoking polari
Raak
But the lim'rick's a cramped space to show it.
Projoy
The bin round has started and, phew,
Chalky
Now diesel fuel's refused - who knew?
Projoy
Ah! No-one will touch it
Rosie
But they will take mutt-shit
Bismarck
So my dog's joined the diesel-fed crew.
Projoy
[Bismarck] Excellent!
It's raining, oh misery, woe.
Raak
My home's flooded, oh where shall I go?
Raak
On second thoughts, strike the "oh".
Rosie
Try the roof, for a while
Stevie
Bed down on pantile?
CdM
Failing that, well, just go with the flow
Projoy
I've acquired a decanter for whisky
CdM
But there’s no call to be so tsk-tsk-y
Chalky
Let's have no half measures
Software
Simply the pleasures
Raak
Of raising the urge to get frisky.
Projoy
In the process of looking for flowers
Stevie
I was caught in a series of showers
Rosie
But I had my brolly
Simons Mith
And wellies, by golly
Chalky
Such meteorological powers!
Projoy
Rising early, I wended to Wales
penelope
To
re
search the fledging of snails
(They take to the wing and leave the nest mid-June or so, I believe)
muttleee
I've spent my whole grant
Software
So now I just can't
Rosie
Deny that it's one of my fails.
CdM
A while ago I had this thought:
CdM
For greater scansion clarity, given that the line could also be read iambically
A while ago
I
had this thought:
Chalky
Can a poetic licence be bought?
Raak
Or is it innate?
Radox The Green
Let's ask the laure
ate
The laureate
Just nick one but do not get caught.
It is I, Rosie
CdM
My darling cannot understand
Projoy
Why her planes can't be friends with the land
Chalky
They circle above
Raak
Sighing deeply with love
Software
This whole verse is rather bland
CdM
Everything I have done, or would do
Simons Mith
I'd do it again, painted blue
Raak
I've bought futures in woad
Software
So I'll make a load
Chalky
Now I own this hex color code too
Radox The Green
"Hast seen the white whale?" Ahab cried
Simons Mith
It's white on only one side!
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