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rab's new gaff
help
This new place needs a little something, while rab has nipped out to sort out the solicitors call in and drop off your gifts.
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A bit of play after all that work, I'll pop this Noddy playset by the bed.
To help with the feng shui and determine the most auspicious place to meditate, a handy ommeter.
He doesn't have a Potato Peeler? How does he make peels?
A Queen CD will privide him some musical diversion while he's peeling those potatoes.
This ripsaw will be useful to help him fit that door he got earlier.
A sunshade, to cope with Edinburgh's tropical summers.
If it's Edinburgh we're talking about, surely a nice tartan kilt is in order.
This large remnant of "luxury" underlay will give rab's bedroom carpet that extra feel of softness and quality. And it's only £4.99 per square yard!
I brought a venus flytrap to keep the spiders down. You can just put it anywhere.
A tame will o' the wisp as a reminder of the transience of all things, even a new apartment.
A xeriscaped terrarium for rab to exhibit his exotic Saharan cactus collection.
A Yo-yo to while away those long hours sitting on the balcony.
.. and a complete set of ZZ Top CD's to annoy the neighbours.
Now what?
Isn't rab affianced? We should bring stuff over for his lady.
Splendid idea. I offer this nice ripe avocado.
Nothing like a large beanbag for those romantic frolics in the living room.
Play safe, here are some condoms.
A Dido CD should help set the mood.
A large roomy easy chair is an absolute must for rab and his affianced one to cuddle together in.
In front of a warm fireplace.
A goat, so rab's goat isn't lonely.
He'll certainly need this hat
I found some ice. I heard it has it's applications.
Some jojoba oil certainly helps with those long senual body massages.
Does the KY need any introduction? I'll get it from the peg on my way out
Some fine silk lingerie for his lady to set the mood.
A bottle of Moët often helps
A nanny goat will keep the aforementioned two goats already acquired by rab busy, so that rab and his lady can also cavort undisturbed.
Ready for when he wants to do a bit of cooking, several kilos of ready chopped onion.
All he has go to cook them on is this old Primus® stove.
Everyone should have a quern. You can't beat hand-ground flour.
A Rubik's cube is ideal to while away the hours whe rab's lady is not around.
Perhaps he could amuse her, or perhaps, himself with these sexy suspenders.
A nice cup of tea.
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