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I Woke Up From The Strangest Dream
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It went something like this: I dreamt...
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... that I was a hamster, which was strange, though quite enjoyable. I ran around in circles for a while, and explored what seemed to be my living environment. It was while doing this I found a gap I could squeeze through into the outside world. However I was promptly found by a large evil looking cat, who chased me around. Running frantically, I paused to look around to see the cat had stopped - it seemed to have been a clockwork cat. At this point the owner showed up - it was Rolf Harris! I fainted with surprise. I dreamt...
...of colourless green ideas dreaming furiously of the day when they might ascend from the abyss of potentiality, and I was the Guardian of the Way, that they might not autoimmanentizate, and they spake unto me, saying, "Art thou not also but an idea, a dream within a dream?" And I scorned them, showing them the sword that I bore, which was called the Sword of Russell that defeated Frege, and that by its virtue they might not pass. But they grinned and were unabashed, and said, "That is a mighty sword, but there is another which is mightier." ...
...pork....hmmmm...I had drifted of into another dream, no longer of swords, but of farmland and countryside. I found myself wandering through ancient hedgerows and treading deep into freshly turned soil. Whils looking up at a kestrel my foot falls into a pot hole and a bang my head. I start to stand myself up and turn to look at the hole that had caused my fall, only to find that I had fallen under a fence rail which now hit me squarely on the head, causing me to fall into an unconcious sleep, where I dreamt...
...that I was in an old gangster-style car with Humphrey Bogart. He was driving around on these endless colorless streets and told me he'd save me the trouble of explaining everything. He told me how I was the one who killed Maxine, but my twin sister had taken the fall for it. He illustrated how I had blackmailed my way out of that trouble with the Carson boys since I was the person who had seen Regan that night in the office with Berniece. He just kept talking. All these intricate plots seemed right on the mark at first, but as he talked he started mentioning names I had never even heard of and all these ludicrously entwined plots, and always driving down these dark grey streets. It wasn't too long before my head was dimly nodding. I realized I had fallen asleep when I began to dream...
...of how I met Augusta one last time amongst the evening trees at Sancéry, and sorrowed with each other over what had been, and as we passed through the formal garden to the sound of unseen harpsichords we turned behind a fomydrangea and there found our graves side by side, open and empty. And so we lay down, united as we had never been in life, and dreamed...
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