Is everyone here for the editorial meeting? Ok, good. Heavy news week this week, so only the best stories are going to get space. We'll start with Cheddar Headlines. Ten words max, and the headline can be self-explanatory as in 'The Independent', or horrendously convoluted, as in, erm, The Cheesy Headline Game. Once the headline is finished, I'd like a few words containing the story in a news style, please. Subs, clear your desks, and let's get the presses rolling. Spike it once we reach the usual back page move.
BBC4 spokesman I.M. Sanguin announced that July will be "Vampire Movie" month. Movies, informative documentary features, plays, musicals and operettas, ballets, Kabuki and Noh dramas and chat shows relating to Dracula and vampires in general will be broadcast around the clock. As a promotion, they are offering the first 100 viewers who sign up on their website and complete the sentence "I'd like enlarged Dracula teeth because...." to receive free of charge (and post paid) a set of oversized glow-in-the dark canine teeth. Further details can be found at www.special_offer/bbc4Canine/VV.