(Just to get things started so other people can do someting better and wittier...) Nine companions (of various species) want to destroy a really evil ring. They manage... eventually. The End.

I had something along the lines of, a bunch of guys get obsessed with jewellery, and try to shove this one bit of it in the crack of some guy who lives in a tower with a giant eye. Three of them are really short, and one of the others does magic and stuff. They're also being followed by a skinny, naked midget with a speech impediment, who wants to wear the jewellery, but they set fire to him at the end.

America (again) decides to have a war. However on this occasion a woman gets involved. Lots and lots of 'stuffing' before she finally gets told to piss off.

Rich Londoners go to a lot of weddings. Then one of them dies and they all go to his funeral. And one of them falls for an American woman but is too much of a wuss to do anything about it until right at the end. Oh, and they all swear quite a lot.

The main character is dead when the film begins. What more do you need to know?